A Brief Apology

Damn i wish I could still watch the video, but it seems deleted. Can you post it here?

I know from my own difficulty that pain is sometimes all you can think about, especially if you don’t let yourself think about it. Don’t forget that you are outstanding at what you’re doing and behind all the shitposting and humor-laden dark history is a lot of powerful messages and stories that are landing directly on who you’re wanting them to. Thought provoking essays you’ve created will inspire an entire generation, I’ve already seen some of it myself.

There was a moment in one of your videos recently where you saw a turtle off camera that almost instantly disappeared and you said "It's gone now. That turtle was for me, not you." I laughed so hard because I remember thinking the same thing about the little private moments of life where it seems as though something wild and universal, something that's supposed to be true, whispers to me. I've loved your channel and creations and I hope I get to indulge in the things you make some more. But nevertheless, I have already greatly appreciated your work, sir. Thank you. It was a honor to hear part of your story

I pay you for art. Your history videos are art, your gaming videos are art; and God fucking damnit this video is the epitome of art. I really resonated in that video about the hunger. How you feel a need to love everybody because we're all just slightly different versions of each other. I have also struggled with my misanthrope, I was never able to so beautifully put it into words as you have. But with the birth of my daughter I am both more horrified and more forgiving of humanities sins. I hope to be able to provide her with a life in where she realizes her worth and doesn't cower in terror of what we as a species do to one another. That all being said, I'm with you man the whole nine yards. You'll come through this some way some how and I hope you continue to produce art for us to enjoy.

What you create matters. it resonates with people and i’m thankful for it.

I wish I was half the wordsmith you are. This one hits pretty close to home. Glad to join patreon for the first time.

The irony is, this video being too personal is the very reason I decided to support the patron after YouTube choke slammed the video off the platform Love your work, dude. Keep making whatever you wanna make

Always enjoyed your videos because of you, funny how it doesn't matter the content, we can really see you in it. Your story hits so close to me and it trully helps putting in beautifull words. I hope i could help even a little bit being in patreon for you as you help me and others a lot.

I’m here after that last video, I’ve been watching for years now and always watch the day I see an upload. YouTube taking this down is, while predictable, bullshit and pushed me to pay. YouTube prefers rich people with fake smiles posting scams and slop that makes them look good, so don’t take it personally.

I am a monkey telling myself endless stories. The only things I know are the stories I tell myself. When I see something my brain tells my a story of what that thing is. When I see another monkey my brain tells my a story about how the monkey is now here. And when I see a monkey a lot, then my brain tells me an old old story, one of friendship and trust. I cannot do much, but be para social with my choice of talking heads, and since you're one of them, I perceive a relationship there. I pay you bc I like your art. I pay you, bc in the story I tell myself about myself, I take care of my friends. You aren't, but that doesn't matter. I am still a creature of narrative. You're not a machine churning money into content, you're simply an artist. My patronage is for you to continue to make art, and you uphold you end of the bargain well

I chose to subscribe to your Patreon because of this video. YouTube as always is unreliable, and I want you to keep going. Your videos are a constant comfort, I often listen to them to help me sleep (nothing like horror and genocide to help you catch some Zs, its weird but it works and Ive always struggled sleeping), but this video, I found your writing here to be genuinely excellent, and worth every penny i now pay.

I just started paying you because of this video. I don’t deserve to watch art this beautiful and courageuous for free. No-one does.

i paid you BECAUSE of this video, very courageous and will undoubtedly help others. excellent writing.

Contrary to this not being what the patrons are paying you for, because of it, I am now paying you.

I hope you upload the video here, I've just recently subscribed to your patreon, as I have - after watching you since the pandemic started, bloody hell that was 5 years ago? I was still in school and you hadn't even posted a history video yet - finally gotten financially stable enough to give back to a person who reignited my love of history after so long of a nihilistic teenaged hood. You've been through the ringer my friend, and I wish you well. There seems to be a curse with artists I love, they don't live long nor do they live well. Whether it is Peter Steele, Eliot Smith, Hemingway, Nietzsche, Hendricks, Van Gough, Jeff Buckley or the dozen others I cannot not name. I hope you may break this curse, or delay it long enough. Forgive my pretentious ramblings.

I can no longer find it on YouTube. I would like to watch. Can you add it to your Patreon?

I'd just like to add my "hear hear" to the chorus of supporters saying "this is exactly what we pay for, we pay for you". That's exactly it. Obviously none of us want to disappear too far up our own assholes, yeah, always something to be careful of, but I like YOUR content, not just content. Anyway, please upload here ... But I understand if you are off two minds on such a personal subject, you do what's right by you, but I'd love see it if you could post it here.

Please repost it here. I only got to watch it at work and I would love to see it again in a better context. You always seem to be there when I need you most. Thank you.

I like your contributions to the information/meme (in the Richard-Dawkins-Metal-Gear sense) pool. This is why I decided to support you. If YouTube takes down your video, I hope to watch it here or elsewhere.

While I cant be a patron of you all the time the few times I can support you it is for the reason so I can support and allow you to create whatever you want and as this video showed no matter what you create you make it worth all the money, so keep going and doing what you want to create, its much more meaningful that way.

The video was taken down before i was done watching it but just from what I’ve seen it’s convinced me to join the Patreon and realistically I should’ve joined when you uploaded the Aztec Trilogy since it’s probably my favorite thing I’ve ever seen uploaded on YouTube in the 10+ years I’ve been on it

This sort of thing is exactly why I’m here, don’t apologize for shit. Thanks for sharing this, it was raw, real, and true. I’m always here for that. Much love to you, it’s a privilege as always to see your art.

I got patreon to help you out because i like you and i relate to your struggle not because i wanted to decided what you should talk about

Can't find the video on YT hope you can upload it here. Love everything you do. And became a supporter because u ar a inspiration in hard times.

I dont like you for gaming and history i like hearing your opinions this is the reason i got on the patreon for because i want more of you not for more of the things we have in common i like hearing about but your perspective and your views and im sad i missed the opportunity to learn more about you

I h@te patreon. if i could find you on su₿scribest@r i would have. i was in the middle of pouring over your words that reached my heart- before youtube took it from me. i think I'll keep my subscription up for the man that changed my life for the good until other options arive. may God bless you, I believe he has great plans for you.

Ive been struggling with alcohol and drugs since im 12 im now 28 and i knocked back drugs 2 years ago and you helped me a lot try to get the drinking under control

I didnt became a big fan of you because of gaminlng or history videos even if i love those things i did because you make me laugh and feel

I hope i get to watch the removed video soon but i mostly hope that it helped you to share mr cobbler

Can you please post it on here? i couldnt see it before it got removed from youtube i was working 10h and youre my favorite person to listen too i dont want to miss the video about the lore of your life i came here trying to see if i could see it

Sorry for my stupidity in advance, but can someone explain the garden analogy to me? What does escaping it mean? At first I thought it was life but now im wondering if its hatred or guilt? What are we growing? Ignorance?

If this was an elaborate ploy to bare your soul then rip it away just to get people to join the Patreon to see it again like some sick carny that hides a malformed person behind a tent... it worked. Now show me that soul.

Your art is always welcome, please share it on Patreon 🙏

It gone from yt before I could watch. Send nudes here

❤

I missed it, and as an alcoholic with certain childhood trauma I wouldn't like to get into right now, I would really value it. I hope it's not down forever

I've watched every video you've made at least twice and many of them more than that, I was in the middle of re-watching this when it got taken down. Please host it on patreon and if you're willing, post an unedited version on another site. I imagine an edited version would fly on youtube considering your Scorn video is still up, but I understand if you're unwilling to change it for those fucksticks.

Love your Videos cobbler, I’ve been watching them since high school and they always made me feel less alone, I didn’t see this one before YouTube took it down, but I hope you post it here. Thanks for everything.

I liked the video so much I watched it twice and then promptly became a wood elf. I've been a fan of your content for a few months now but now I'm a fan of you. Please hang in there, and also post it here so my little sister can watch it aswell

if anybody sees this the video was just removed from youtube. literally while i was in the middle of it because youtube does not like to see inside the soul of a human

Oh shit he's self-deprecating and talking about factory farming boys were eating good tonight

We pay for you big dog, maybe getting this shit from inside of your brain provides some type of catharsis, but it probably won’t. Hooves hurt yet we keep trucking.

Brother, this made me cry. Thank you for being you. It hurt, I know you hurt too. I hope one day we can truly escape the garden and look back upon it with peace in our hearts.

Never stop making content like this. Thank you

thank you cobbler

Watched the video a bit ago and honestly, it was beautifully made. Even if the topic was hard for you, it felt meaningful and wasn’t a waste of anyone’s money for you to spend time on! Keep on keeping on, and know that we enjoy everything you make and you’re valued just as you are (as much as you can to those of us on the other side of the screen)

DJ I just want you to know that many of us fans appreciate your work. Mine wasn’t as graphic but I was sexually assaulted by a man in high school. All of your videos, including this one, have encouraged me to move forward and I’ve found a better place in life. I love your videos and think you do a great job, and I would love to keep watching them, so please stick around with us. You might not see much of the results but the world is brighter with you in it, trust me.

I guess yee haw summer is over

Highly convinced this is a suicide note

Thank you for making this video.

The sentence was beutiful. I'm so happy and glad you are here. That you exist. I will never fuckin know you. I don't care. You have a beutiful soul and the strugle with the fuckin garden. I felt it too. I called it The Lie. And in my hour of doubt you force me to try again. Your words over the years made me see humanity and to not hate it. Thank you

We pay for the art you make. Whether it's a creative analysis of video games and their cultural significance, a satirical "world news" update, an amazing series of history videos with deeply moving stories, or an incredibly deep, self-reflective video about our lives and the human condition, we pay for those. We pay for the art you make. We're here because we appreciate what you create, and we appreciate the person, you, that makes them. Especially if creating such an important video for yourself allows you to further create more videos. Continue to create, make what you want, and what you find important. I've been watching for years and finally created a Patreon specifically to subscribe to you so you could keep making these projects. I actually want to personally thank you. Many of your videos are deeply moving and made me much more introspective about what I wanted out of life and how I should interact with the world around me. You're an amazing YouTuber and a magnificent creator.

also on a serious note, I access youtube through 3rd party client to avoid google stealing my dick pics. this video is age restricted and requires login, so upload to patreon would be cool. but I'll figure out how to watch it either way.

don't you tell me what I fucking pay for I'll pay for processing trauma if I feel like it

I pay to hear the ramblings of a funny and intelligent madman so I’m getting my money’s worth

The ending sentence of the video, thanks in part your delivery, was so utterly powerful. Thank you.

I disagree, this IS what I pay for, it might be a crowd sourced patronage, but it's a patronage all the same, and to reinforce that point, I upped my membership from £3 to £4 a month, if I could afford more, I would pay more.

Bitch I paid FOR YOU. Not your content

I’ve increased my membership tier by $2 just to spite you

Cobbler, I signed up here BECAUSE of these videos. Never think your work in this direction is anything but worth it. Post it here, I know I'd love to see it.

Cobbler, what we are „paying for“ is your story, your life your Art and whatever you feel like to create and share with us. You are express a kind of depth that is not often seen in creators and it’s all worth it Thank you big guy

Thank you for this video. Its strong its tough, its what life is. All i can say is respect to you , respect for the artist, respect for the man you are

My dude I don't pay for game reviews I pay for art, I pay for you, I pay for the soup of the human condition unleashed in both pain and splendor. The tangible form of what you make and give to the world is not a percentage of the reason I support you, the fragment of your soul is what i see in all your work and I want to support. I had the opportunity this week to visit the national gallery of art and of the countless displays only four caught my eye. One was the architecture built by the blood and toil of countless people who infused their very being into the foundations. Another was the skater which was a composite of the central figure ive skating and flexing on the city put together after what was recorded as a display of prowess and fun. In every single piece I enjoyed the form did not matter, it was the soul that I loved and it's your soul that you put into everything you do that I cherish. I see that you're an artist and I'm sorry, the least I can do is watch and appreciate you and I believe the world is better for it

I ain't paying for Game Reviews, nor Aztec History Rants, nor Yeehaw Summer (though I really should). I'm paying for DJ Peach Cobbler and that is something that requires no apology from you.

I know it's parasocial, and you don't know me. I am just a Batgirl profile picture that gives you money… but I hope you find peace. I hope we all do. Your videos often feel like a shot of adrenaline to me—something real and raw in a sea of AI and soulless corporate bullshit. Make what you will, post what you will, but I'm here for the long haul.

Can you post it on here also? Just in case YT decides to get funny, it can be here as some sort of backup. I really would hate for something like this to be lost due to some algorithm or policy update.

don’t tell me what I’m paying for. Shut up & take my money.

Fuck dude

Jesus let me be a scitzo femboy cuck, godamn it man

I'm here to support an artist, not pay for a streaming service. So there is nothing to apologize for. What you need to create in order to sustain your art is what I want to support. I've learned so much from your videos and I want to keep learning for years to come.

We support the artist not the art! If you need some introspection and to make art for YOU too then we support that as well👌🏻 post it where you wish and we will watch as soon as we can 🫡

We, or at least I, am not paying you for a specific type of content. I'm donating to support your creativity, wherever that brings you.

Apology denied, I pay for this content because nobody makes it like the recovering alcoholic pie musician

I've been following you for hot minute BECAUSE of your voice and the art you put out there. From one Vet to another, the things that are most personal, are usually universal. Look forward to this and any other artistic adventure you set out on from an intentional and personal place.

I haven't seen it but I already love it. Candor and vulnerability make for content that CONNECTS. Them's the rules, you pasty pastry

I pay for you to make art & cultivate your voice. This is absolutely what I pay for.

Don't tell me what I pay you for. I pay you to do what you want.

As a parasocial Andy who pays you to create, I can't besmirch what you choose to make. You felt compelled to make it and feel it is worth it to share. Thank you for putting in the effort you do in what you make, and I'm sure this piece, while presumably different than the norm, will be worth it to watch by that basis alone. Take care of yourself, that's some of the best we can ask of you

Broke MFs have parasocial relationships on accident, i on the other hand Woke Chad i have parasocial relationships because i want to and yes, i want to know what my Texas femboy alkoholic is up to and how he's doing. As someone who grew up in abusive home with alkoholics(yes i'm Polish) i love to hear others talk about trauma, being autistic truly is "please, don't do the small talk, i will literally prefer to be trauma dumped" because it's more interesting. And to be honest i think you are in my top 3 youtubers(with hbomberguy and Ssethtzentach) and listening to the creator talk about themselves is like adding a bit of that creme and those red cherries on top of a cake you may not present shit 100% as it is IRL for you, you may even lie most of the time but the illusion... i enjoy it. please take my money i love you xoxo

To find treasure, you're going to have to dig. It's hard work, and the digging is part of what we all pay you for. Thanks for sharing your process with us, man.

You are the one artist I support. You do you bro. This plebe isn’t going to tell the chef how to cook.

Brother, I (and probably the others) support you because we like your content, but most importantly, we like you and want you to have a bit of stability in this bitch of a world. Keep up the good work Peach boy. Whatever it may be I'll be watching it

Apology not accepted as it was not necessary to begin with.

I pay for your content man, all of it. Release what you need to.

Do your thing cobbles yeehaw

Good, everyone has already said the thing I was going to say.

The deep thoughtful understanding of literary significance and history is why I like your particular blend of lib cuck, incel, gamergate humor. The content I want is whatever you can make and I am genuinely interested in whatever tangents or self discoveries you go down. Also on a side note, its really awesome that you seem to be cleaning up your life and developing personally, and your content is getting better. Lots of artists think their drug use or depression is fueling the quality of work, but when they let them selves treat their depression in healthy ways they find that the depression was slowing them down.

I only want folks like you to have one incentive. Create what you feel right in making. That’s exactly what I pay for, Pie Man.

You are mistaken, I paid for your content because I want you to feel free to make the art you want to make.

Giving you the security to make self indulgent bullshit is exactly why I'm here. Make what you need to make.

How do I explain to this man that I just want to see him happy and working on whatever the F he is most passionate about?

I mean. We like your videos as many do with YouTubers for their personalities and takes. I think it's a bit short sighted of you to think this video is not what we support you on the Patreon for.

I pay to hear your perspective on anything and everything. I’ve been watching since before the history content and your videos have impacted my way of thinking about history by applying the same Deeply Human approach to the subject as your gaming videos. Your videos about sobriety was impactful even to someone who hasn’t struggled with the same issues. Be safe out there Mr. Cobbler.

Love you Pie Man ❤️

Peaches. Unless I didn't get the memo, I don't believe anyone was provided with a syllabus or content schedule. We showed up, tossed you what we all could, and waited to hear you speak. If anybody here is having misgivings about the journey, I'd think they have not been paying attention for some time. We're here for the perspective, the insight, the jokes that light up the dark, the short jaunts and long rambling journeys, and all the things that make up not only what is coming to the table but who it's coming from. Keep going. *Every time a video gets posted here I raise my monthly sub. I'll do it now even though not posted not on patron, just this once >>

Don’t be so presumptuous to assume what I pay for. I pay for you to make what you want. History, games, or your spiraling, I’m here for it.

Godspeed

I don't want to go all parasocial on your ass, but I contribute to the patreon because I enjoy your purely entertaining content, but mainly I fund the channel because of the whole package, I think of you as an artist. I know that word is loaded"artist" but the amount of time you dedicated writing, editing, scripting, thinking about things, reading, books, literature. I think you've met that bar

bruh I pay for all videos, even if it was a 5 second peak into the homie hole. godspeed you magnificent bastard childhood trauma is a bitch to deal with, especially if you've ignored and suppressed it for years (speaking from experience lmao). proud of you man

Idk what you're talking about bud, anything made by you with any semblance of effort and passion is exactly what I'm paying for

We're here for you my guy. Make whatever you wish, we'll support it

I agree with everyone else here, we pay because we want to hear what you have to say. You've earned our continued attention, and you've earned every dollar we give you

Cobbler, we’re getting what you wish to make, yearn to make, and can make. We’re getting exactly what we’re paying for. I’d like you to post it to Patreon, though that’s just because you’ve (semi-jokingly) said you’re afraid YouTube will delete your channel. If you don’t think they’ll actually do it, eh, skip posting it here. Use that bandwidth for something that makes you happy. Excited to see the video tomorrow - take care and rest before trying to run on bruised feet

Thanks. Your videos are art (and sometimes informative). If something personal is what you needed to do, then it's what you had to do. I've always thought this patreon shite was to support an artist to make whatever they're making. If this is some 5 tier ironic confessionalism I will lose it. As for speaking on your past. It will help those who are yet to deal with their version of the same mucked up nightmares. Thank you. I think it's safe to speak for everyone in; we hope this finds you well and long may you ride these dark stormy waters to brighter skies or some other poetic watery shite. Thank you!

We love ya Cobbler! We all know getting in touch with your feelings is gay, but we can all be a little gay once in a while

We have been paying because you have earned our trust as a creator of art; making something outside of your normal parameters doesn’t mean it isn’t what we are here for.

Your videos always mean so much to me. I have had my struggles with alcoholism (sober for years now, thankfully) and recovering from childhood trauma. Your video about sobriety was so impactful for me, so I imagine this one will as well. I love your work, I love the way you phrase things, and if this helps you process them by all that’s worthwhile in this world I am happy to view it. Stay strong, pie man.

This is good and cool but, is it also cool and good? Only time will tell.

we pay to support you as a creator and your endeavors of entertainment. job well done sir.

looking forward

Bro I pay you for your art all of it. No matter what you want to put out I'm just here to observe and take it all in

Still, as always, a happy patron and will continue.

Can't wait for it man, hold you in high regard. You showing your humanity and struggles and your steps forward, they inspire me. Creatively and as just another man. Hope this gave you some peace.

I pay for a glimpse into a real, articulate, over baked mind that is a picture of anyone similar, and under the age of 50. If you wanna show us the inside of the oven, and the rack your brain fell on that gave it the perferation that made you eat chalk (hope you stopped btw), than I'm all here for it, take my fucking money.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but I know I support you to see what you have to say. Nothing more, nothing less. Keep up the good work.

“This is absolutely not what you’ve been paying for.” Dawg, hearing you talk about whatever the fuck—big or small, personal or not— is exactly what I’m paying for.

You being authentic is exactly what im paying for

Love you boo 😘

There’s nothing to forgive

Need that personal Cobbler lore so I can deepen my parasocial relationship with the pie man

As if anything you make is less than a stunning work of art.

Anything by you is worth watching, DJ.

We're paying for your thoughts. So this is what we're paying for.

It's cool dude