Dispatch no. 27 // Updates Podcast

Oh yeah, I’m really not a kid person either…and I have two of them. Haha! It turns out, I really enjoy hanging out with MY kids; I just don’t like other people’s kids. And though I think my kids are interesting humans, I limit those conversations to my husband and my parents because, imo, listening to stories about other people’s kids is just as bad as having to sit through their vacation photos, or (even worse) stories about their office life. 🤷‍♀️ Anyway, this is just to say please don’t automatically discount a seemingly good friend match just because they are a child caregiver. Some of us parents have a really hard time making friends for this reason, too!

I think a lot of people dislike kids unless they’re related to them lol

I have said since 6 years old that I don't want kids and now at 30 years old, I still think that way. I don't get the whole idea and "baby fever" thingy. My fiancee doesn't either, we kinda hate kids tbh. If one can say such a thing. I'm okay with them if they are not around me. But yeah, I guess it's mostly about finding like-minded ppl, I hope you don't hang less with us straight ones either, some of us are not so into babies or "basic" lifestyles either:)

After seeing your kitten joy my family is now adopting a ginger boy who will come to us In two weeks! He is joining two old men kitties to keep them on their bean toes teehee My dad is from upstate New York and lived in a Victorian home. It is beautiful there, my only complaint is how cold it gets in winter, so save extra for the heating bill but otherwise awesome and Within reasonable distance of some cool ass places. So I have four kids(two sets of twins) and I can’t help but feel attacked lol. I am a pessimist as well but one of my contrary traits is that I believe more leftist awesome open minded people need to raise kids in order to see change. If your parents hadn’t done the baby thing Bianca I wouldn’t be able to have your creations and personality to enjoy alongside you. Also i think I feel like everyone else here when I say I think we would be good friends and have fun hanging out together. I feel your “couple” friends should have included you more and that’s just bad manners on their part maybe. Lastly if we ever hang out we can compare awesome Egyptian tattoos. My husband has a little scarab that is thousands of years old and it might be one of the reasons I married him. JK How the writing going? Mine is stalled lol 😂 Anywho have a great day and I can’t wait for your next post. Much love, Karin (egyptianbloom)

I was impressed with Ithaca the one time I went through there. I feel you on the price of old houses -- where I live the century homes are in the millions, let alone the older, more ornate ones.

I did not know that cats loaf. I have a rabbit and know about bunny loafs and dead bunny flop.

You should move to Nashville. It's not all country music crap. The cost of living is low and the city is pretty progressive and inclusive (for a red state). As a fellow Cancer, we could hang out and you would never hear me talk about climbing the corporate ladder because small talk is the bane of my existence. You would hear me talk about my four cats and my witchcraft practice!

We loved the finger lakes area when we were there on holiday years ago - the b&b we stayed in was Victorian gothic American style. Yes, here in the UK lots of Victorian houses but ours are classic Victorian - beautiful red brick, stone bay windows and the occasional turret!! Way more important to move somewhere with like-minded peeps though. And yes, the whole nit wanting kids is difficult when you're younger but once you look like you're a bit older people will stop asking - trust me! I lost touch with a lot of friends who went down the baby route - soooo boring in the early stages when that's all they want to talk about. If they offered Mr z baby I just used to say only if you want it to immediately start crying! I a light hearted way of course babies sense when someone isn't comfortable with them. Got me out of it every time! I find that the easiest way to have great friends is to find those with the same interests - I got into historical costuming 4 years ago and now go to quite a few events meeting up - and am on historical costuming FB groups with the same people. My current funest friends are those I've met through sewing. We ALWAYS have something interesting to talk about! Currently in bed with our tuxedo cat curled up between us. I really should get up and get some breakfast but yes, you've guessed it I don't want to disturb him! 🤣

As an owner of an orange cat, I guarantee that all orange cats share exactly one brain cell. I've never met a smart orange cat lol

The whole 5th Person thing made me think of the scene in Bridget Jones where she goes to the Smug Marrieds dinner! (I do sympathise).

Bonus cat! :) I love that you got a bonus cat! I too get motion sick if I'm not watching where we go, and have had the awkward situation of wanting to look at kitties but also wanting to not be ill. Orange kitties are often dim. And I think their colour is linked to the Y chromosome (like tortie colours are to the X), so they're almost always boys. Have you been woken up at o-dark-hundred by Ollie's face slams? My Socks does that. He doesn't like lying on laps, but will gladly stand on my chest, or snuggle across my shins. I remember in my early 30s, all my friends were talking about diaper services and breastfeeding and I thought "how soon can I leave?" They kept offering their offspring to me to hold and my internal monologue was, "oh hell no." Five years later the kids were at that wacky age where they'll go in any zany direction you offer, and I was the crazy aunt that the parents rolled their eyes at. I'm also the one who told them, as teens, "when you drink, call me to pick you up. I promise to bring you a barf bag." Bummer about your tattoo appointment! :( Can't wait to see how it looks! Someday I'll get a silhouette of my cat that passed, and a d20 die. My outrage meter has been stuck at 11 for the last few years and at this point, I find it more satisfying to just pet the cats instead. Visit the Finger Lakes (south of I-90), it's gorgeous there - and there's a good coffee place somewhere there called Big Nerd Coffee (I know because they stock the RPG book my friend wrote). I don't know about the cities so much, I live in Boston, land of All The Victorians. It's harder to find houses here that are recently built. I love my house (1894) but I wish I had air conditioning and modern wiring. Plus, Boston lets you see that there were some butt ugly Victorian houses too. At any rate, if you make it out to NY, you should attempt to come up this way to Salem. Don't, for the love of Pete, try to go there over Halloween because there are line ups of cars inching into town on those days, but it's worth it to check out the fun places.

I fully understand the tattoos vs family hating them situation! But now I have a full sleeve and my mother hasn’t disowned me yet!

Hello! I live in the Rochester, NY area (town of Irondequoit specifically). We get 4 seasons and have plenty of antique shops. Plenty of nice towns to hit up, you may want to check out the finger lakes area. Happy to answer any questions you may have.

Welcome to the "I'm not a cataholic, I'm just Cat-A-tonic" club! Love my kitties too. No children, just my husband and cats! Not a think wrong with that choice. East Aurora, NY. This is an arts & crafts town, home of Roycroft! I think you would love. The whole area is fantastic! Agree our country is falling apart. Being part of the group that fought hard in the 70s for our rights, SCOTUS sucks. I cannot believe how corrupt it has become. Everyone vote Democratic - our best chance at fighting back the bigoted, old white men. I'm for banning Viagra, Sorry for venting so hard. Once an activist, always an activist.

What is the name of the tattoo artist?

Meeeeeooooww meow meow meow. Ppprrrrrrrrr

I'm very happy for you and your upcoming tattoo appointment. I'm not into them myself, but we've all got to do what makes us happy and I feel happy knowing you're happy. Your tattoos aren't like others I've seen, they're historical and I like that. My grandmother had a Cartouche from their travels to Egypt and I've always thought your right arm tattoo resembled that. I feel the same way about not having much in common with people who want the status quo life. It's like being a puzzle piece with no other pieces to fit with and it only seems to get more so as time goes on. That's why I love my piano and my music so much. Speaking of pianos (black and white) your last dress is very cool. When you put your arms out, it's like that trippy glove video you made a while back. I wonder if you'll still make a white dress for your birthday. Your kitties are adorable and your parents sound like likeable folks. Enjoy your birthday activities. I have a Frank Lloyd Wright post card here which I coloured for you, taking inspiration from some of your latest designs. I'll put that in the mail to your PO box. It sure has been a rough week, but thank you for the friendly podcast and the extra video. Planning a possible scouting trip to upstate NY sounds fun. Downtown Rochester is rather depressing (except for the Eastman School of Music) but outside of downtown is lovely. I remember Park Ave and the George Eastman House. Highland Park is quite nice! I'd like to know the towns better myself as I'm close to the border. Hugs to the kitties!

Don’t know how you’ve had the time to kill it with the so many versions of space queen dresses like you have with some many kittens demanding so much attention. Hope the new tatt turns out as well as you anticipate, nothing like your birthday as an excuse to splurge on some new adornments. I hear what you’re saying about the awkward social engagements too. Once you fall out of that standard cookie-cutter American template it’s sooo hard just to have any common ground to interact with most people anymore, especially if you’re also introverted. Hopefully your upcoming social interactions are less irksome.