[TADC] 📜🎪 M A K I N G ◦ A N ◦ N P C ! - Act 6 + 7

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M A K I N G ◦ A N ◦ N P C !

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CHAPTERS 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21

⊹˚₊·‧Chapter 6: Clip

Instead of getting messier, more overwhelming, and more straining, life actually started to be more exciting for Pomni from thereon out. She found herself enjoying watching Ragatha over the days. Seeing how she would hide her state, acting normal, having fun with the others. Forgetting all about it at times, until Pomni saw the tiniest hint of a curve, or caught Ragatha touching her belly for a brief moment. Seeing her grow. Witnessing her love and care for the upcoming NPC. Exchanging short, knowing looks every now and then, of which Pomni didn’t fully understand the meaning of, but always liked it; As if they were accomplices in a secret game nobody had the luck to know about yet. The touching of Ragatha’s belly every night, feeling the shifting and kicking. And even hiccups, occasionally. Sometimes from the front, but also sometimes from behind, when they were lying in a more spooning position.

Pomni didn’t think too much about everything. Not at all, really. She was just… experiencing. Until, one day…

“Yo. You’re crushing, or what?”

Pomni lifted her head, blinking slowly, as if she was just catapulted out from the REM phase of sleep. Just in time for Jax to take another picture, with what looked to be a kid’s toy version of a camera.

“W…. what the hell….” Pomni mumbled, “Why do you even have that??”

“Answer my question, jester.”

“What question, I don’t get what you’re asking. Crushing what?”

“That piece of work over there.” Jax specified, nodding in a certain direction.

Pomni followed Jax's nod, directing her gaze to the spot she had been staring at for the last minute. Ragatha.

“Whaaaaaaat….. noooooo……..” she slowly said, careful to sound as bored as possible. No, wait. She did sound bored. She didn’t have to try. Because it wasn’t true.

Jax snorted.

“You’re sweating.”

“Nooooooo…….” Pomni repeated and then stood up from the couch. “You’re sweating.”

Jax stared at her for a moment. Then his grin grew wider.

“I mean… no! Don’t get any… no! Wait, no seriously—!”

FLASH.

Another photo.

“This one might be the center of my Pathetic Pomni Photowall.”

“Jax, what—— why do you— no, wait, just—”

“Shhhh, shhh. It’s okay, my little gooning chum. I forgive you.”

“JAX!!” Pomni screamed, making all the others standing further apart turn around to face her.

With that, Jax just went up to the dormitories. Pomni was left under the gaze of everyone else, sweating and with a pounding heart.

She stared back at them, panicked, feeling caught in a rather graceless position. She looked at Ragatha, who also stared at her curiously.

Unable to keep up the eye contact, and absolutely overwhelmed about how to behave, Pomni slowly walked backwards, keeping the same pose. Wasn’t it raptors who couldn’t predict movements when you walked like that? Maybe it worked in the virtual world, too?

Her back touched the wall. 

She didn’t care.

She pushed with all of her might and… actually managed to clip through.

Chapter 7: Ready

She tried hard to not think about this in the following days. She had been getting good at that. But Jax's commentary didn’t leave the echo chamber of her mind. Every time she caught herself looking at Ragatha, or thinking about her, every time their gazes met, every evening Pomni crawled into Ragatha’s bed—the ghost of his words teased her, in her head.

He just… he simply didn’t know the truth.

Yes, Ragatha and she were connected, but not in the way he thought. Besides, Pomni was pretty sure that Ragatha wasn’t swinging that way. She had talked about an ex-boyfriend in the past, and she also didn’t particularly seem to be into women. 

But after she calmed down a little, she noticed that Ragatha was behaving a little differently, too. Avoiding gazes. Being a little awkward. Being a little more touchy, maybe. But then rather distant at nights. Or was it just Pomni’s projection?

Whosever fault it was—their dynamic had changed a little. And it was becoming cumbersome.

Pomni had to do something.

So eventually, she found herself in front of Ragatha’s door, knocking.

She heard shuffling inside, then the door opened, just enough for Pomni to see Ragatha’s face.

She seemed exhausted, blushing in a strange way.

“H-have you been crying?!” Pomni asked instead of greeting her in any civilized way.

Ragatha seemed surprised. “W-what? N-no, no, don’t worry!”

Then, when Pomni didn’t stop staring in concern, she added, “I… I was just… exercising. It’s… it’s important in pregnancies. In… in any case, what can I do for you, Pomni? It’s not evening yet…”

This was peculiar. But there were more important things to attend to.

“I… wanted to talk. No, I needed to. To talk. I mean. With you.”

Ragatha looked at her perplexed again, then gave her a weak, unsure smile. “Uhh… n-now?”

Something inside Pomni couldn’t wait any longer. Before she understood what was going on, she heard herself form the sentence, “I’m ready to be a parent!”

Pomni could see in Ragatha’s face that she was just as surprised about this as Pomni herself, who threw her hands in front of her mouth. Why had she said that? She hasn’t even thought of that yet! She wanted to talk about something else!

The expression on Ragatha’s face changed and took on a more embarrassed look. Maybe even apologizing.

As Pomni asked herself what all of that was about, she heard somebody in the room yell. “OOOOO, THE DRAMA”

Ragatha opened the door a little further, revealing Jax behind her, who—almost not surprisingly—took a picture of Pomni.

The flash made her dizzy, and she stumbled a little. “J…  jax…….” she stuttered, confused, not able to process the situation.

“Go on, Pomni. Pretend I’m not here! What were you about to say?”

“T…. t-that I’m….. r-ready to…. t-take on … a parental role for… for Gangle….”

“Awww,” Jax replied, “That’s sweet, especially considering she’s older than you. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.”

“Y… y-yes… haha…”

“Jax…” Ragatha said with reproach. 

“Yeah, yeah, I always know when I’m not wanted. And you know what? This time I’ll even leave.” He commented, squeezed himself through the door, and added, “Don’t do what I wouldn’t do, girlies. Have fun thinking about parenting stuff for Gangle!”

And with that, he left.

Pomni stared at Ragatha, apologetically. But Ragatha looked more annoyed than frustrated. Though that changed when she looked at Pomni; She gave her a weak smile.

“Come in,” she then said, opening up the door even wider.

“I’m… Ragatha, I’m sorry, I didn’t know—”

“It wasn’t your fault. Please, come in.”

Pomni followed up on her request, but only now did she start thinking about the possible reason that Jax had been at her place. Especially when… she was exercising? That was… that was strange. Like, uncomfortably strange.

Ragatha sat on the bed and sighed deeply, exhausted. Her belly was now almost obvious, particularly in such a position. It truly was a miracle that nobody had figured it out yet. 

Then she looked at Pomni again. “I’m sorry all of that happened. What you said was… it was actually…”

She hesitated. Did she… was her face getting redder…?

“I mean, could you repeat that for me, so I can react properly?”

“I’m…. Ragatha, I… I really would like to, but I have to admit that I’m… a bit thrown off here.”

Ragatha looked at her, somewhat concerned, somewhat ashamed, maybe?

“I… I suppose that’s… fair. I will explain it to you… eventually. But I’d really, really love to hear about your feelings right now. That was… that was nice, how you just… wore your heart on your tongue right now.”

Pomni stared at her. Then she decided to swallow down her reservations for now and do what Ragatha had asked her to.

She came close to her, taking both of her hands, kneeling down on the floor in front of her so that she could direct all of her attention to Ragatha.

“I’ve been passive for far too long. You… you were so brave for putting up with me like that. I behaved like a… like a spoiled adolescent, who was in for the fun, but not for the responsibilities, leaving you alone with the position of a parent.”

Ragatha smiled, sheepishly. “I allowed you to.”

“Yes, but—” Pomni began, squeezing her hands, “That’s not who I want to be anymore. It was nice for a while, all this secret keeping and treating the situation as if it was nothing but a new adventure; It was that for me, after all... I never wanted kids, really… I always hated the idea of fulfilling this role that’s expected of me as a woman. And seeing you like that… it changed so much inside me. I just look at you, and I’m so… so fascinated. Inspired. But I think I’m coming to realize that… that’s not what I want. For you to be just a fascination and inspiration for me, I mean. Not for you, but also… not for myself, either. I’m… call me crazy, but I’m proud to know that you’re like… this because of me. It might seem selfish of me, and maybe it is, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. I want the others to know. And most of all, I want you to know.”

Ragatha stared at her, her eye glistening like a beautiful gem. 

“I know you could do that alone. Having you seen like this—and, God, you… you look so, so pretty with this belly and this smile on your face while touching it—I have not a single doubt in my mind that you’d be the most caring mom I could imagine. But I… I found myself wanting to actually be part of it. I’m willing to pay the price, even if it’s my sanity. No matter if I’d fall for the NP-... for the baby.”

“Pomni… you called it the baby…”

Pomni nodded, her whole body feeling uncomfortably hot upon her own words. She felt like she had undressed herself, in the best and worst way.

“Y-yes. Because that’s how it now feels to me.”

“Oh… Pomni…” Ragatha whispered, now squeezing the hand too.

“G-god… t-t-this is almost… u-unbearably kitschy….” Pomni stuttered, trembling. “H-how did I get i-i-into this… I… I actually haven’t planned to say any of t-t-this. I don’t k-know what’s wrong with me—”

“It’s okay…!” Ragatha said, then looked around, her gaze eventually resting on the door. “Do you want to go out and take some deep breaths? And come in again when you feel a bit more settled…?”

Pomni couldn’t stop shaking.

“Or… or would you maybe like me to hug you until you calmed down?”

Pomni’s heart felt like it was about to burst out of her chest.

“F-first one, t-thank you—” She quickly said to counteract, getting up with what felt like legs made of cooked noodles, then wobbling to the door. 

She didn’t dare look at Ragatha again when opening and closing it behind her and leaning onto it.

She grabbed the part of her chest where she thought she could feel something beating inside, trying hard to calm down without having another meltdown.

It was okay. Everything was okay. Her body and mouth had decided to act on their own. No biggie. Happened sometimes. And… and eventually, it was the truth. All she had said. It was what she wanted.

Maybe it was some sort of reprogramming that came with the pregnancy. Maybe Caine… wanted things to evolve this way. After what he had done in the past, this wasn’t unlikely. But maybe… maybe Pomni truly was feeling more nuanced things for Ragatha. Maybe this would stay one-sided. It was all okay. It didn’t matter. In the end, all she could do here in the circus was… to make the best of it. To enjoy it. To give herself over to the experiences.

But… if possible… a bit cooler than whatever she had presented Ragatha with a moment ago.

It was okay.

She could do it.

After another deep breath, she was finally relaxed enough to enter the room again.

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Rose comment: I just want to say that I wrote this before EP7 came out—imagine what I felt when I actually saw this photo wall in Jax' room hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh