[TADC] 📜🎪 M A K I N G ◦ A N ◦ N P C ! - Act 3

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M A K I N G ◦ A N ◦ N P C !

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⊹˚₊·‧Chapter 3: Talk

Pomni couldn’t even process this.
All of this led to nothing. Right now, she wasn’t capable of grasping anything.

The only thing she could do, really, was not leave Ragatha alone right now.

So she got up again, slowly, as if she wasn’t a child anymore but an old-timer, with every movement being impossibly hard. 

Then she opened the door to her room again.

Ragatha was now sitting on her bed—finally—the somewhat deranged, worried look on her face revealing that she had heard Pomni.

It was okay. Pomni couldn’t fall any further from grace.

And it was… interesting. That she had given Pomni the space to do what she had done.

“I’m sorry,” Pomni said meekly, standing now before the closed door. She didn’t dare to come closer to Ragatha.

“Oh, don’t be. It’s… it’s quite understandable. It’s a weird situation, isn’t it…? And, well… it took me a whole month to cope, so… yeah. Understandable.”

Pomni lifted her head again. That’s right… Ragatha was all alone with this. For a whole month. What a terrible thought.

“If… if I may ask… why did you wait so long to tell me?”

Ragatha brushed through her hair again. It looked pretty. And it, again, revealed her middle, which was a bit clearer, now that she sat.

“I’m… I’m not sure, really. I think I… I wanted to know where I stand in all of this before revealing it to anyone. To think of all the options. To see—in case there was an option to ask Caine to… undo it—whether I would like to follow up on that or not.”

Pomni came a little closer. “Ragatha… that’s… that’s some tough journey until now. That’s pretty strong of you.”

“Is it…? I don’t know. I don’t feel strong.”

“Then just take my word for it. I’m… I’m sorry I didn’t react as cool as you’d deserve.”

Ragatha chuckled. It sounded so sweet. Pomni liked when she did that.

“It’s okay. I think we process things differently. You seem to have been able to see everything all at once. I was just… dissociating, I think? Questioning? I don’t know.”

Pomni came even closer now, standing next to one of the poles of her canopy bed.

“That means that…. every time I asked you to come with me to ask Caine about the wheel thing, you…”

“Yes. I already knew.”

“Oh… oh god. I’m… I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be. It was my choice. And I was curious what Caine would have to say.”

Pomni looked at her. Never had Ragatha seemed so brave before. Who knew she could be like this…?

“So… can… can I ask your stance in all of this…?” Pomni asked, carefully.

Ragatha nodded. 

“I want to keep it.”

It felt like somebody had glitched inside Pomni's chest, grabbing her heart. 

She couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad feeling. But it was intense. She could barely breathe.

“Assuming there might’ve been a possibility to get rid of it. Which there might not have been. But whatever will come out of this—I want it to know that I truly wanted it, you know? If that makes sense.”

“It… it does.”

“But… b-but I want you to know that this is completely my decision. I don’t… I don’t expect anything from you, Pomni. Just because I agree to all of that… doesn’t mean that you have to. It might be yours, but … just by code, probably.”

Pomni couldn’t help but stare at her, in awe. Ragatha seemed so… mature about this. So settled. So caring, both for the hypothetical child and Pomni. And maybe even herself, too. 

“How… how do you know it’s mine?”

Right after saying that, Pomni felt ashamed of her question. She sounded like a petty dude who didn’t want to cope with the consequences of his actions, trying to put the blame on somebody else. Even though she didn’t meant it like that.

Ragatha lifted her head, looking at Pomni. “You mean, aside from the assignment on the wheel?”

Pomni nodded.

With a sigh that could mean many things, Ragatha looked at her belly again, touching it with the most gentle care.

It made Pomni’s heart start beating again. It looked as if Ragatha was meant to be… like that. To be pregnant. To be a mother, eventually. Like as if she was, right in this moment, her complete, authentic self.

“I’m… I’m not sure. “I just know it” isn’t a satisfying answer, I know, but… It’s like that. It’s a bit scary. Because it doesn’t feel like human nature… I have to admit, I don’t know much about computer science, probably the least of everyone here, but if part of me has a code, and the baby is also… code… then I can just feel that it has part of yours. Does that make sense…?”

Pomni nodded again. It did, somehow.

“But… a-again, just because it’s yours, doesn’t mean you have to take care. I… I understand that this is a tough request, because… how should you distance yourself from that knowledge? And… and I’m sorry I can’t take this off your shoulders. But I can promise you, that I will take good care, whatever will happen.”

Looking at Ragatha, Pomni had no doubt that she would.

“So much so that you would never feel like you should intervene. And I… I will not tell the child that you’re the other parent. It will be your choice if you’d do it, and when.”

Ragatha seemed so… so confident in her choice. So sure. It was… rather enticing.

“You… you really thought of everything, didn’t you…?” Pomni said, while gently fidgeting with on of her costume’s yellow pompoms.

Ragatha gave her a smile. It looked exhausted, but genuine.

“Yeah well… I did nothing but, for a month.”

Pomni finally found the courage to sit on the bed again, next to Ragatha. She laid her hand next to her on the mattress and opened it, a silent offer for Ragatha to hold it. Ragatha looked surprised but took it. Pomni squeezed it gently.

“Thank you. For being so… down to earth about all of this. And for presenting me with such thought-through options. And… and for giving me the distance I needed earlier. That’s all… that’s all pretty neat of you, Ragatha.”

Ragatha gifted Pomni another one of her smiles.

“You’ve been very honest to me, so I… I won’t lie to you. I… I do need time to process this, Ragatha.”

The ragdolled human nodded agreeingly, reassuring Pomni non-verbally.

“I don’t know how long. I’m… I’m ashamed to say this, but… judging by the size of your belly, things seem to progress rather quickly here, so… so it might not be after it is here. Whatever… it is. I really can’t say.”

“It’s okay. I didn’t expect anything from you. Oh, wait, no, that sounded… that’s not what I meant--”

Pomni shook her head to show Ragatha that she hadn’t misunderstood her.

“I probably will have to be alone for a while. I’m… not sure. But… but aside from everything, I’m here for you as a friend… ok?”

Ragatha squeezed her hand. “Yes. I understand. Thank you, Pomni.”

Then she got up.

Pomni couldn’t help but look at her stomach again, her face felt strangely hot.

“Just so you know… I won’t tell anyone for now. And if I plan to, I will inform you beforehand, so we can… agree on how much we share. Okay?”

Pomni nodded. “That’s very fair. Thank you.”

And with that, Ragatha gifted her one last encouraging smile, then left Pomni alone in this room full of doubts, worries, and unnamed feelings.

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