Balthasar Speedboat: Skincare Edition feat. Alex Haddow
Nothing but riffs. Nothing but jokes. Noting but Riley revealing more about himself and everyone saying 'I'm confused' or 'oh, that makes sense.' And this one features friend of the show and repeat guest Alex Haddow as well.
Comments (30)
"Derived being gay from first principles due to being too autistic" is pretty much my actual sexuality though. Am I an AU of Riley?
Did Riley really mispronounce cynar? Absolutely unhinged.
You can tell that Russian comedian story as many times as you please it is literally the funniest shit I have ever heard I cannot imagine it getting old.
Heavily armed bakeries guards is just Central American culture, in Guatemala they prefer a fuck off shotgun over an AK but same principle
I am begging you to put the political correctness gone mad section up on YouTube because it would kill
Brixton maccies with two bouncers undefeated
wasn't fritzl's wife deaf
Respect Milo's commitment to Balkanisation
Fuck muslimification, I want full Bosnification of norway today. Letsgooo 🏁🏁🏁🇧🇦🇧🇦🇧🇦
It brings me great joy to inform Milo that there was a one season US re-make of Life On Mars where the stinger wasn't that they where in purgatory but IN CRYROSLEEP on their way to MARS to start a NEW LIFE and apparently the people in charge decided the best way to prepare future Martian colonists was to put them into 1970s NYC COP MATRIX
I'm deeply fascinated (but not to the point of tracking down and viewing) the Spanish Life on Mars because the conceit is obviously a bit more heavy handed in Francoist Spain and also I want to know if DCI Eugenio Cazador is an Atlético Madrid fan or an Espanyol fan. (Real Life on Mars heads will get my meaning.)
I like when podcast guests accidentally describe how I've been dressing for the past 3 years
The Erotic Walkingstick?
Sure, I'll carry the heads of my transphobic kinsmen on my belt as trophies like my Celtic ancestors would've wanted. How much?
Tying together 2 themes from this episode– weird Austrian shit and weird Victorian shit– there is the anonymous pornographic novel “Josephine Mutzenbacher” https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Josephine_Mutzenbacher . Purporting to be the memoir of a sex worker who began her career at age 5 (!), it has been repeatedly banned and unbanned in German-speaking countries, because despite being, you know, fucking child porn, it is one of the only works recording the Viennese dialect spoken at that time and therefore possessing some cultural merit. The kicker? Despite being anonymous, linguistic analysis proves it was almost certainly written by Felix Salten, the guy who wrote “Bambi”! Somehow, I’m not expecting a Disney adaptation of this any time soon
Linguistics takes us to some wild places, huh?
Noting
Riley's status as the world's fanciest socialist is completely untouchable at this point
He just wants nice things for all of us 💔 💔 💔
Gregg's in Brum has bouncers! So does the Macdonald's on "the ramp"
you joke about the funeral cake but my gran's funeral actually did have fantastic catering
I work for a catering company that does funerals and what strikes me is how we largely stopped doing weddings because people are so cheap and weird about it (like wanting steak for the primary party and hamburgers for the rest of the guests), whereas families of the deceased are like "oh they liked meat, we could do a three option carving station"
"So autistic you've become gay" please put that on a soundboard lmao
Excellent skincare routine Riley but if you wear sunscreen during the day you really want to use the oil based cleanser at night, to get the sunscreen off before you go to bed, then follow with a water based one. This has been completely serious skincare notes on an otherwise very funny comedy podcast, thank you.
I got the bus from Split to Dubrovnik - We had to stop in the Bosnian seaside town of Neum. On the stop I tried to upload a video of a millipede I’d found to my Instagram story, instantly tanking all of my data & costing me a lot of money because we were technically not in the EU & this was out of my roaming deal. On re-entry from Bosnia to Croatia the border guards picked out all the obvious foreigners to search them for contraband. They offered me something like a £700 fine if I’d surrendered them at that point, or £1.5k if they found it during the search. After being strip searched they had to let me go - although in the process of checking every pocket of my bag they opened one with a crumbled oil pastel in it, covering the guard with blue pigment. They weren’t best pleased.
One of my fav European borderlands. Thank you for sharing your tale. 🙏
was not expecting riley to have a full American Psycho face cream routine
"There is an idea of Riley Quinn. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, I simply am not there."
A24 is no longer as interested in artsy movies unfortunately. The enshitification continues
Yeah, at this point I have to admit that Milo’s completely right about Serbia, though I would add that it’s in many ways achieved slavic horseshoe theory as our president god called the f-slur a few times like 10 years ago and now regularly does this show of power in both TV appearances and national addresses where he talks about what “they’re saying” and regularly refers to himself as an f-slur in so doing. Bonus: his eminently kissable lips have earned him the nickname “picousti” (lit. pussy mouth). It is on this basis in combination with myriad other disturbing idiosyncrasies that I might recommend serbia as an ideal location not for tourism as such but rather a kind of Karen’s Diner experience on a national scale.