D&D Court: Forgotten Traps, Sci-Fi Shenanigans & The Dice Christ Data Dilemma

Love me some spicy Murph 😂

Another case where a player thinks they deserve more from a nat 20. A nat 20 doesn't mean auto success on checks. Sure the DM could have done a little more to remind the player of a trap that was there, but the nat 20 shouldn't give me a free pass on consequences

Are you telling me my numbers and maths arent magical?

I wondered when they’d finally mention heated rivalry

strange murph vibes on this one not a bad thing tho

Did anyone check if those Flinestone cups have lead paint?

Small head, huge ass, can’t lose

I think in the Khorne Conundrum: the player reacted the way they did because the DM brought it up in front of the other players, and the player wanted it to be a secret betrayal angle

Where on EARTH is the IMAGE OF SLIM JIM GUY i was PROMISED 😡😡😡😡

If you love the Flintstone's movie glass set (which I also have!) you should pick up the corresponding Batman Forever Mcdonald's glasses too!

re: Forgotten Trap When the DM says "the exact square", that makes it sound like they're using a map. If they're using a map, I'm on the DM's side actually. A player is responsible for remembering where they placed their trap on a map.

I absolutely ADORE the PO Box shout outs. You gift giving fans are the best.

I don't know of anyone got the answer before me, but a Petard was an exploding device and foisted is similar to hoisted-its something like lifted up. So foisted by your own petard is like your own bullshit blew up in your face

as a canadian i will say that poutine needs to have cheese curds. you can change the type of gravy, but if it doesn't have squeaky cheese curds and you tell me its poutine i will be dissapointed. that being said as long as it has fries, gravy, and cheese curds you can add whatever else you want (taco meat for example) to it and its still poutine

It’s true your honour. The DM has no dick for Michael chick

Point of order: Conjure Woodland Beings 5.5e doesn't actually summon anything. It creates a damaging shield, not unlike Spirit Guardians.. So technically it doesn't actually break the rules of single combat

I have a big collection of the other fast food chain glass cups they used to do, they do spark a lot of joy to drink out of lol

It’s so funny that they independently stumbled upon resident evil as precedent for the lab/mushroom case given that the submitter’s campaign is almost exactly the plot of resident evil 8

"Petard" was also slang for "huge fart"! So the phrase also means "sickened by your own rotten ass".

For the 17 year old fungal paladin I feel like the super shroom can be upset he’s not spreading spores so he attacks his dad. Then the paladin has to leave the lab to protect his dad despite what that might do for the contagion. Just another idea the pod didn’t come up with.

Was anyone else introduced to Slim Jim Guy because you could play as him in Dave Mirra Freestyle BMX 2? Or is that just me?

If i had two nickels for every time the two crew made a Snow White and the seven dwarves OC, I would have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird it happened twice.

Murph confidently listing the Seven Dwarves and Caldwell quietly impressed muttering "...off the top of his head" fucking killed me 🤣😭🤣

“Something’s rotten in the state of Murphmark” deserved more love, Caldwell 😂

Also to the person who had the Confessional: Try rolling a few sets of dice every time you play! Declare to your DM and table ahead of time, so they know what you’re doing isn’t some crazy shenanigans and it’s all in the name of science, and then roll all the sets and record their results. (Obviously you would need to declare a “prime or gamer” set that actually counts towards your session.) This would be an interesting comparison to see other dice compared to your original set! …this is all assuming you regularly use the same dice at least most of the time…

As far as I’ve always remembered, Sneezy was always allergy coded! Maybe it’s a Mandela Effect but I could swear Snow White gives him flowers and he sneezes the petals off or something? …or maybe it was just Tuberculosis…

Don't be the 8th dwarf mopey

This was a great episode, I laughed a lot. Thanks!

Caldwell it was Sister Bear but you were super close!

Okay, I scanned but didn't see anyone mention that the phrase is "foisted by my own pitard" not "hoisted."

How come there hasn’t been an officially sanctioned Dice Christmas? I feel this has been a faltering on behalf of our Divine Justices.

You could not, even in like a hotel or dystopian space ship, insist your room is someone else’s. Also, you as a player do not have to believe a fellow player’s deception.

Little bombs are called pétards, because they are being compared to farts in French. To fart is péter, pronounced pay-tay. Fun fact: when you say ChatGPT in French, it sounds like you’re announcing to your cat that you farted.

Thanks for including my case, Magnificent Crit Justices and Cuck Juck! For a little more information for everyone commenting, this campaign was the first D&D for two of the players, the Monk being one of them. The Monk’s only experience with TTRPGs was, in fact, Warhammer 40K and was an avid player and loved the lore. So yes, the Monk did know that Khorne was a chaotic evil God and voiced to me that he knew of the ramifications for siding with them and was all in up until it was time to side with Khorne. I spent years overthinking on that interaction and that being the last session for that campaign which bummed me out because it was set in the same world as my first major campaign and I was attached to it. But now I’m running games for other groups where there is respect at the table and better communication from not just my players, but myself as well. Thank you for reviewing my case, may all your important rolls be 20s. 🙏🏻

i wonder if the monk got the two gods mixed up (either in the discussion ahead of time or during the session)?

That they did an entire bit about a mascot named "loli" with no alarm bells going off shows how pure and untainted the boobs are and I hope they never change

What tier do I need to have to get a couple podcasts of Jake reading- his soothing voice is the perfect ASMR to fall asleep to 😅

“Every girl from a coven I was in” might be the most Emily Axford sentence I’ve ever heard

naddpod NEEDS to talk about ace attorney truly

oh my god mopey -> millennial dopey

Those Flintstones mugs are likely very high in lead content sad to say. It’s in your best interest to not drink out of them, but there’s no harm in keeping them as a collectible

i love murph’s ✨ passion ✨

As a former (microfilm!) archivist, I salute all archivists! 🫡 Truly doing SUCH important work!!

VINDICATED!!!

Anyone looking for khorne knows what they're getting

I'd like to humbly request that Caldwell should definitely draw Marlon Brando with a switch or a Gameboy saying "I'm gonna get a Nintenda" during his next drawing stream. It's such peak Just Two Things millennial cringe. It would've been on so much merch circa 2014.

Holy shit!! I also graphed dice rolls! 🤣 I’m the DM, though, so I did it for my three players’ skill checks. They roll online, so it was easy for me to get the data along with what skill it was. And then I used it to sermonzie about Dice Christ to them, because they are nonbelievers 😭 something had to be done, though, to convince my Paladin husband to stop using Deception and stick to Persuasion

The chance of only rolling 7 Nat 20s or less out of 353 rolls with totally random dice is only 0.93% (I think I did the math correct?). So pretty unlikely if the dice were totally random, though possible I guess

Nintendo games in your stocking, okay rich!!!!!

Another soul claimed in the name of the Naddpod Nightmareverse

I actually would like a madoka campaign

Oh we’re talking petards? Where’s my Age of Empires gang at?

i was scrambling to comment about the origins of being hoist on your own petard when caldwell looked it up and now i have um actually blueballs

Btw the ending of the Shield series was mega lame btw, no justice for the corrupt af cop

The confession is a classic case of “Not fair, you changed the result by measuring it!”

I’m with the DM on the first case. Players should take notes and keep track of stuff like that. Having a gap of time is no excuse at all and just shows how sloppy this player is. It’s the most annoying part of playing DnD with some people. It’s like you people don’t care about what’s happening and what you do. Take some notes people I beg of you. That player deserves more traps thrown at them. I don’t get the “honor the nat 20” thing. Unless it’s an attack it’s not an auto pass. The player shouldn’t get advantage or anything just because of that. I don’t understand these people sometimes, it’s like they want to reward the worst players for being unprepared. It’s so unfun.

For the mushroom campaign, paladins have the ability that makes them immune to disease. Not exactly the same as fungal spores, but that's a decent enough basis for why they would not become a spreader.

There is no way the player would not know that Khorne is evil by default - he’s literally a chaos god from essentially 40k’s hell dimension and is where we get “blood for the blood god” from

For that mushroom submission I was just imagining the lords from re 8 as a dnd party.

Semi-automatic truck is wild

For the dice Christ data dilemma, it's easy to check! Do a t-test, I bet there are online t-test calculators. If the result show your amount of nat ones and nat twenties are statistically insignificant you are all good - as the judges said, you just need to roll more dice! Also numbers and statistics are absolutely magical in their beauty!

during the Mopey on the Moped segment I had to check and make sure I wasn’t listening to a short rest 😂

Did not expect a DS reference in 2026 lmao

Small head, huge ass, can’t fail

Dickless for chiklis!

If you track dice rolls on a spreadsheet there are easy ways to have it automatically track things like most often rolled (mode) or average die result. I know this for normal, non-blasphemous reasons

Murph so sassy today

I'm really curious about the semi-automatic truck Emily mentioned 😅

I have a confession for dice Christ that's pretty good should I post here or wait for case request? The headline is I've been playing DND for 10 years, started playing a paladin for the current ongoing campaign the last year since it was my favorite world of Warcraft class.... I did not know paladins had a pool of spells and a set amount they can prepare each long rest

Thank you for reminding us of the Crash Bandicoot to The Last of Us game development continuum

Hi Emily, if you still want an aura picture taken, visit Magic Jewelry when you're in NYC again!

So jarring hearing the queer history Boston plug at the end right after going on a queer history Boston walking tour yesterday???? Shoutout queer history Boston!!!!!!

It’s funny that in a case about a potential worshiper of the Warhammer Chaos God of War Khorne, the crew seems to propose a potential rebrand of Sneezy as an acolyte of Nurgle, Chaos God of Pestilence.

enchanted by the idea of there just being miscellaneous witches out there who were once in a coven with emily axford

I can't even give the monk player leniency on "oh maybe it suddenly felt too evil". It was their idea. They knew who Khorne was.

Oh a classic too much birthday? Say no more

I think the DM trap case up top is valid actually It reminds me of the Castle Ravenloft board game, where a trap left armed can come back to bite you later I just think it’s a fun turn of events and a fun challenge Besides, why exactly does disarming and then rearming a trap make you completely immune to it? Silly But I thank Jake has the right of it Also… I can’t believe this episode ended with them soft-reinventing numerology We’re swiftly approaching official cult status

Oh Christ, I do not like Slim Jim

who else is dickless for chiklis

Emily pours nat 20 glasses of water, but doesn’t like to drink it 😂

I think the biggest crime in the first case is how the DM ignored such a ubiquitous and fun trope: remembering a dangerous thing that you just bypassed, and turning the tables on your attackers. Thats just classic adventurer stuff across pretty much every type storytelling medium. If I was the DM I’d be excited to remind my player about it and see what creative use they could put it to.

Semi automatic truck is forever in my dictionary now

the shit question and banter was so funny but when they started gaslighting murph on his nerd cred i weirdly got emotional for him 😂

Small heads, huge ass, can’t lose

"Think about Heated Rivalry, but for a courtroom." unfortunately someone already made this, and it's called Ace Attorney.

Full stop. Wtf is a “semi-automatic” car, Emily??? 😂😂

I don't think it could've been an issue with the monk's choice coming across too evil, because Khorne is nasty as hell so he would've known what he was signing up for when he proposed the concept. I'm inclined to believe Justice Murphy's initial hypothesis that the monk was a certified Main Character who was looking forward to playing out the scene solely on his terms and couldn't hang when the DM tried to do it collaboratively.

I never trust the recaps Caldwell gives of anything after the way he mangled that episode of Futurama where Bender becomes human. 🤣

omg my dice christ submission! for anyone curious, i do mix up my dice (based on character) and 6s have been the most frequently rolled ever since 2024! but i will start tracking auras and report back in 10 years with more comprehensive data thank you clergy members

When will the shop get Roll Dolls?

Yay!! In time for my bike ride home! (It’s windy and chilly out there so it might be a rough one) xoxoxo

I haven’t listened to the episode yet, but judging by the link to the slim Jim man, I know this will be one for the books.

Heated rivalry in a courtroom is already ace attorney

just finished c1 ep 70 i need to laugh 😭

Sorry, snail