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October 20, 2020

Based On True Events

to be fair, it DID break the skin

Comments (52)

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Coriander in the Spice Rack · October 22, 2020

Elliot is a lovable guy who loves animals. Enough said.

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Darcy Conaty · October 21, 2020

At ~ age 13 I rescued a squirrel from a dog, and the squirrel promptly bit me (right through the thick gloves I was wearing - I wasn't a TOTAL idiot). My mother called the doctor, told him what had happened, and asked about rabies. The doctor reassured her that, "Under the circumstances, I think the squirrel had a perfect right to bite her." In retrospect, that may have been a little more casual than warranted.

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Kriss Pang · October 20, 2020

I don't blame Elliot for asking, rabies is scary!

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Lisa F · October 20, 2020

As someone who literally got attacked by a squirrel a few months ago, I feel Elliot's pain.

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darklion · October 20, 2020

My dog found a baby bird in the grass and shook it to death. I freaked out so much I almost scared him into oncoming traffic.

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Kattandra · October 20, 2020

i had a dog ages ago, that licked a bird so much it died and then he continued untill it essentially fell apart, very nasty

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Marc Moskowitz · October 20, 2020

Didn't Eliot have one of the neighbor cats regularly wander into his apartment in an old story he told once?

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Solomon Garland · October 20, 2020

Moses. He passed away last year (comic time, I guess) at the age of 17.

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Sarah Ellis · October 20, 2020

Haven't been bit by a rodent, but I did once have a squirrel bounce off my back. A heavy rainstorm broke a big limb out of one of the many oak trees in our front yard, and it landed in the street in front of my car. The tree limb was so big that I ended up scraping against some lower branches on one of the trees when I was moving it out of the road, and I accidentally knocked a squirrel out of the tree. The squirrel landed on my back, but bounced away immediately. It didn't break skin, but rather was one of those "Did what I think just happened really happen?" moments. And yeah, I've had cat drags in a dead bird moments, but it's not nearly as bad as having to deal with a cat leaving a squirrel corpse in the yard.

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TV4Fun · October 20, 2020

My cat is a very good hunter. Not so much of a killer. He once brought a live chipmunk inside the house and then let it go. That was fun to try to catch. BTW, chipmunks can detach their tails if grabbed by them, so if you have to catch a chipmunk, don't grab its tail.

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David Pipes · October 20, 2020

Our cat when I was a kid was the opposite. He constantly killed stuff and brought it to the mat at the back door, so my mom would find it in the morning with the cat waiting for approval. Once it managed to kill an entire groundhog; it squishily engulfed her foot when she stepped out groggily to get the paper, and the screams woke half the neighborhood...

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Finvaara · October 20, 2020

Delightful

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Jon Guyer · October 20, 2020

Was it a radioactive chipmunk?

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Bagge · October 20, 2020

That can't be good!

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Bagge · October 20, 2020

Date's still going fine :-)

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Nancy Boutwell · October 25, 2020

clap clap clap

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Evgeniy Semyonov · October 20, 2020

Clinton: - Ha, really? Billie Eilish: - He's the Chipmunk Guy. Duh. Clinton: - What?! Billie Eilish: - I'm Billie Eilish.

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Scott Vogel · October 20, 2020

This is very important surgery.

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Hugh Eckert · October 20, 2020

Once our old hound dog actually caught a rabbit. My spouse said he looked very confused at this point, like, "OK, what do I do now?" She told him to drop it; he did, it ran away, she told him he was a good boy and he was happy. Dogs.

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Captain Button · October 20, 2020

And so Eliot failed to become "Chipmunk Guy", fighting evil with his Super Chipmunk Powers. 8-({

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Chris Vermeers · October 20, 2020

The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl had (or has, depending on how you count a title that has been retired) a crime-fighting partner called Chipmunk Hunk.

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KCkittysnores · October 20, 2020

Chipmunk teeth will just keep growing and growing unless they soak them in human blood.

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Nancy Boutwell · October 25, 2020

haha!

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Marc Pengryffyn · October 20, 2020

People talk about all the dangerous wildlife here in Australia, but at least we don't have rabies. I'm thankful for that.

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Jeffrey Anderson · October 20, 2020

With all the spiders and snakes you don't need anything else.

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Populuxe · October 20, 2020

More like Chipmunk Hunk, amirite? (Yes I stole that name from the Squirrel Girl comic.)

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Michael Grundy · October 20, 2020

All these years people thought that Martin was Jeph's autobiog char, but it's really Elliot.

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Joseph Bonnar · October 20, 2020

Chipmunk guy? Ooooohhhh, I love that.

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Carl Fink · October 20, 2020

"... all I have to do is remember an embarrassing that happened to me." So Jeph got lost, bit a huge muscular guy and got thrown out a window?

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Tudza · October 20, 2020

Beats the wounded bleeding rabbit my cat brought in. Woke up a 0300 to let her in and didn't see she had something in her mouth. Then the squealing started. Didn't get bitten. Oh, and the bat from the attic the cats brought downstairs. Fell to my mighty tennis racket, poor thing. A bunny is one thing, but I didn't want to mess with a bat.

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Simon Green · October 20, 2020

My asshole dog went hunting rabbits one evening a few weeks ago. Came back in around 9pm, jumps up on the bed, goes hoik, hoik, HOIK and pukes up a fucking rabbit head complete with ears right onto the bed spread. Fortunately my wife was already asleep so it was not necessary to evacuate and burn down the building.

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Bruce · October 20, 2020

Oh, Elliot, you wonderful soft boy, you!

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Mike · October 20, 2020

If your vet laughs at you for getting bit by a wild animal, you needed a new vet anyway.

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Rachel Maeroff · October 20, 2020

Right?!

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Thisguy · October 20, 2020

Last week, a young Eastern Brown Snake found it’s way into my house. Luckily I was in the room at the time. For non Australians, this snake is very deadly (as in, actually deadly, not “joking about how deadly stuff is in Australia” deadly), so the natural response for many who encounter this snake is to scream and jump up on a chair. Thankfully, the snake was able to be removed from my house.

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Crushogre · October 20, 2020

I'd be in trouble if I ever moved to Australia. I have an almost instinctive desire to catch any snake I see, and I know that that is a bad idea with aussie snakes if you don't know what you're doing.

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Zodiak · October 20, 2020

Had the same thing happen to me. Replace chipmunk with squirrel, and chucked out the window with threw out the back door.

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Beechwood Chip · October 20, 2020

Same thing, but bat, window, and it didn't bite me

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Charlie · October 20, 2020

Why would a vet laugh about that? Any wild animal bites should call for a rabies shot, especially rodents.

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Jon Daneman · October 20, 2020

Because he definitely, completely unnecessarily, poured out the whole story of chasing it around for an hour because his cat was too dignified to do so. And should also have probably called a doctor for humans, rather than a vet?

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dirtknight · October 20, 2020

He says "oh my gosh" How precious can Elliot be

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Mel · October 20, 2020

He is a marshmallow in all the best ways

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Michael Boettger · October 20, 2020

Hasn't Eliot heard of brooms? Sweep the chipmunk out the door and call it done.

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LH · October 20, 2020

Cosmo!!

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Brandon Terrell · October 20, 2020

Jeph stop appropriating your characters for personal cuteness.

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strngbirdx@gmail.com · October 20, 2020

Not everyone has chipmunk scars, though.

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Miyaa · October 20, 2020

This would explain your fascination with Squirrel Girl, Jeph.

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Michael Boettger · October 20, 2020

And just how is Cosmo doing in his forever home?

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Miyaa · October 20, 2020

Tomorrow: Cosmo lapping cereal (soy milk of course) while Clinton’s mom is baking CBD laced dark chocolate mint chip cookies.

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Michael · October 20, 2020

There are worse things a vet could call him.

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Simon Green · October 20, 2020

Late For Dinner?

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Peter McDevitt · October 20, 2020

ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!