May-time faves

My May kicked off with an unforgettable road trip to Glastonbury for the magical May Day and Beltane festivities! I witnessed the enchanting raising of the Maypole and soaked in all the vibrant energy of the celebrations. It's been a month of highs and lows, but here’s what’s been keeping me going!

—There are Instagram ad’s between every single story these days. It’s wild. How many times can insta try to sell me Fussy’s all-natural deodorant? I am not the target audience. As someone unhealthily obsessed with hygiene—more specifically, smelling good—natural deodorant simply isn’t going to cut it for me. Give me all the aluminium, please. The £6 dove maximum protection cream stick antiperspirant is my go to. That’s the shit. You smell good even after a panic attack or late-night-fever-nightmares. Iconic.

One of my current fragrance obsessions is Café Rose by Tom Ford. I’ve always been a fan of Tom Ford—I mean, who isn’t? His fragrances have a distinct voice: sophisticated, sexy, commanding. Especially those classics in the ribbed glass bottles—you know the ones. Café Rose is this gorgeously rich, spicy, balsamic rose scent. It highlights Turkish and Bulgarian rose, laced with coffee and cardamom—a divine combo—plus patchouli, coriander, and base notes of frankincense and sandalwood. On my skin, the coffee doesn’t come through as literal, but rather as a smoky, creamy warmth that elevates the florals and spices. It's sultry asf!

Another thing I’m still obsessed with? Ambien. Lol. That hasn’t changed. I just made it through one of the roughest periods I’ve had in ages— double entendre intended. I jest. But I digress. I took Ambien every night for the past week—not just as a sleep aid, but to untangle my body from its anxiety-induced knots. It gives my racing mind a mini-vacation to, quite honestly, the cosiest highs imaginable. I’ve just reordered a fresh script from my online pharmacy. I like to stay well-stocked—at least a couple of boxes stashed away in my drawers—especially after the various medication shortages and recalls I experienced in recent years.

…I even drank a little over the weekend—unusual for me, considering I’m strictly a special occasion drinker. —Though it was a special occasion! The mix of Klonopin, a half-Ambien, and cocktail or two sent me floating off into a silky dreamworld before my head hit the pillow. Luxurious.

The sun is finally back out, and being the simple creature I am, I’m overjoyed! Seriously, what the fuck is up with English summer time? It’s scandalous. Two days ago, it was grey and raining. Yesterday? Muggy, sweaty, still grey. But today? Glorious blue skies. More of these pleaseeee!

This morning, my elderly Jack Russell woke me up—she bravely climbs the stairs to my room before flopping down beside my bed like a slightly dishevelled piece of roadkill. She then snores like some kind of industrial motor. She’s an absolute angel, but my god, the volume. Her snoring can yank me straight out of a nightmare!

Speaking of sleep, I’ve been religiously spritzing the Sanctuary Spa Wellness Solutions Sleep Mist lately. Normally, I’m not a fan of sleep sprays if they’re lavender-heavy, but this one surprised me! It smells dreamy. No cloying lavender here, just creamy woods and a soft, powdery floral that feels soothing and enveloping. I’m 100% repurchasing the full size once I finish this 75ml mini. Apparently, it’s a “scientifically proven” sleep aid fragrance. No clue what science they’re referencing, but whatever it is, I’m here for it.

In other exciting news: I’ve started a brand-new supplement regimen! I discovered this super ethical, female-scientist-founded brand called Ditto that specialises in PMS support supplements. As someone whose premenstrual hormone dips go hand in hand with suicidal ideation, I need all the support I can get. After doing online supplement research, naturally, I fell in love with the most expensive option—about £54/month—but with an every three months subscription, it’s slightly cheaper. So I subscribed to be billed £126 every three months.

These pills are not only packed with everything my body allegedly needs to reduce all pms symptoms, but they’re also stunning. Transparent capsules filled with golden oil and rose-gold beads—honestly, they’re almost too pretty to swallow. But swallow I do. Two at a time, actually. They’re quite large, but the soft vegan gel capsule helps them slide right down. And really—if you’ve ever dry swallowed Godamn hexagonal, hello-kitty and domino shaped mdma pills in festival tents, you can swallow anything. Anyway, I’ll deffo report back on whether the supplements help with my PMS. Fingers crossed they do. Something’s got to; pray my nearest and dearest lolololol.

Hope y’all enjoyed this informal, magazine column style, life update post!

The lineup…