DIRECTOR'S CUT: Psychology of a Hero: MATILDA

Just realized that I never commented on this episode. This must be fixed immediately seeing how much I idolized Matilda growing up. I cannot emphasize just how much she influenced me in all that I did and even do. I even wore a red headband as a kid in place of a ribbon because I didn't want to feel like I was copying her too much. It gave me strength every time I wore it. Even when it would scrape my scalp 😅. Yes, pictures of this exist lol. Literally every single thing Jono and Alan mentioned in this are all ways of how I survived my childhood. I often escaped into books, movies, TV shows, and video games when I was able. I went out of my way to befriend teachers and kids my age. I had bullies, yes, but I also always had a support group at school. I stood up for my friends without question, then would be forced to be quiet back home. I did all I could to find the good amongst all the horrible, and by golly I still do to this day. As for my superpower: I learned how to read people. I learned how to understand their needs, their wants, and goals. I used this as a defense mechanism for many years, knowing when to walk on eggshells or knowing how to make the abuse stop more quickly. Now, I use it to help people 💙. To anyone who is struggling with this now, take heed. Remember that it's possible to claw your way out of the hell of wherever you are now to a better place here in this world. It's so worth it. I don't know who you are but I'm rooting for you. Always.

To the question of what do you do with the ‘bad’ in your heart. I turned my trauma into spite. I had suicidal ideation as a teenager. I still sometimes do. I refuse to let them take the rest of my life, like they did my childhood. I have a wonderful, full life, and it is literally from defiance.

I loved this movie so much, and, looking back, I can see why. My older (7 years) sister is a narcissist and was emotionally abusive to me more days than not until she moved out when I was 9. As a kid, I could not have explained why I identified so much with characters like Matilda, but. The signs were there. PLUS, I spent a holiday weekend catching, like, 137 newts, so. Not to flex or anything... What superpower did that trauma give me? The ability to mirror others. I match energies and ways of presenting in an uncomfortable way when I don't have the reigns on it. It makes sense; if I'm similar to my sister, that's safer, right? (Wrong, but that's because nothing was safe) But what has it helped me do really successfully? Therapy. I make sure I hold on to my core self and become the version of me that my clients might find most relatable, safe, or just familiar. I doubt they even realize it most of the time, and it isn't such a flip that my friends or family wouldn't recognize me, but the ease that I shift is...weird. It legit feels like the emotional version of Mystique, but...more subtle? I honestly think I could be the world's best actress, but we will NEVER KNOW because my stupid tiny hometown shut down the drama program just as I could have joined. Oh well!

I freaking LOVE Matilda! It’s one of my family’s absolute favourites! Back when blockbusters were still a thing, we’d rent this movie at LEAST twice a month 🤣 We quote “much too good for children!” so many times……hahaha This entire cast is just so incredible. I adore Mara Wilson. And the MUSIC IN THIS MOVIE is so iconic. To this day “Send me on My Way” is still one of my favourite songs.

Trunchbull killed the dad, right? I don't think they ever clarify that she also did the same to the mom.

I love matilda. I believe it is because of what happened when I was so child and the fact that I have now got the strength to stand up for myself and others and I resonate with her in that respect. I won't always do it, but there are times when it needs to happen. Thank you for doing this episode.

I don't have kids and was too old for this movie (tho the perfect age for the book). But I really appreciate the discussion and your question to the audience. I grew up with abuse and neglect. Self-soothing is definitely something I had to learn very young and I use it all the time. Also empathy - I use it in my work as an activist. I know how to be a "diplomat" and how to better navigate the bullies I encounter as an adult. I am EXTREMELY difficult to manipulate, because I grew up with a master manipulator. I also appreciate the note about inner defiance being a way to stand up for yourself. It is a powerful survival tool!

What makes Danny DeVito one of the best is while they were filming the movie, Mara Wilson’s mother was battling cancer and it was dedicated to her. I believe it was also said they watched it before it was officially released and before her mom passed.

Favourite childhood movie ❤️

Aww, I got a mention! Thanks!

I just recently watched Matilda I had no idea that is aunt Marge. Bullying abused wizards since 1996 :D I'd say in this case there is a bit of a difference between revenge and retribution. Matilda doesn't do it for herself but to bring Trenchbull to justice and to stop her from abusing others. I'd also say immediate retribution is sometimes neccessary to set boundaries. At highschool guy splashed water on me when I was reading book so I'd "grow up" (I'm pretty tall for hobbit though), so I filled watering pot, splashed some water on ground as he was running with his bagpack so he'd slip and then I just turned it upside down on him while he was lying on the floor. He never bothered me again.

loved this movie growing up, it still makes me ugly cry. thx for taking my suggestion for Matilda :)))))) 🫶🏻

forever keeping the phrase “I will not accept input on my character from a Trunchbull” stapled to the wall of my brain

Matilda is such an important movie to me. As an autistic person, it is one of the absolute first special interest movies that I can remember having. It spoke to me in so many ways, and it really helped me through some tough times. I just got my first ever order from Lisa's Popcorn, so I am super excited to watch this and snack in a couple minutes!

My mom wanted to play a trick on her colleague & ended up making him believed their work place was hunted. She used to work at an hospital during the night. Only time she saw someone run in the air as they jump in fright. The guy is ok & know it was her.

OMG! I love this! Matilda is my heart character. I love the book, I love the movie, I enjoyed the musical (though it doesn't quite hold the same place in my heart), and I love this review! I'm especially thrilled to see the bonus episode! My birthday was last month and it feels almost like a late present. Lol

I definitely identified with Matilda growing up. Autistic girl growing up in an abusive home. I didn't have telekinesis but a lot of times nuerodivergence can feel like a super power. I definitely used books to escape my reality and found as many extracurricular activities I could do and get away from my family with. For me the thing I took from it all was a lot of compassion and anger. I went to law school to bring abusers to justice, but ended up burning out before I could get there. Now I kind of just help those close to me and try to actually take care of myself and not just other people.

This was class , I remember seeing this for the first time in the Cinema it was class then and it’s class now , I see myself a lot in Matilda I never had friends I felt like making friends was in what I did hobbies like Music , Books , I befriended animals very easily, Connection to humanity is still a weakness for me because I’ve spent so many years being a loner and I guess being hurt by people hasn’t helped my situation so I’ve ended up with trust issues I can’t get to close because I feel I’ll be hurt in the same way so I don’t connect to anyone anymore because I feel that way I can avoid being hurt , And I did once convince someone that there house was haunted , Psychology was so fun for me dealing with bullies 😂 this was class Jono & Alan looking forward to Villain Miss Trunchbull !! I appreciate the walkthrough on this Jono 🥹 Also a big Roald Dahl Fan I’ve actually got the book Roald Dahl’s Revolting Recipes Bruce Bogtrotter’s Cake Recipe is in the book there basically all food recipes from Roald Dahl’s famous books 😂😄☮️💚🪬🌙🌈⭐️👌

I loved reading the book Matilda as a child, and this movie was amazing. Looking back, I emulated Matilda in the sense that I went and found humanity in books. 📖 It was an escape, but the books I read were usually people on their Hero’s Journey. I don’t think I connected that until now. Such a good episode with a great balance in me connecting the dots from my childhood to now, with comedy helping to levy the heavy moments in my memory. Thank you all on the Cinema Therapy team for this. Many previous therapists have asked me how I went from a child literally locked away for laughing with my sister after bedtime at the age of 4, to being brave enough to report my mom for child abuse at the age of 10, to joining and enlisting in the Marine Corps at 19 after personally witnessing 9/11 while growing up in NYC, and then retiring after 20 years. Reading, and later movies, was such an awesome escape; it’s so amazing to see that it was also trying to connect to the humanity in myself and others. I’ve been trying to reconcile that within myself recently, what’s a healthy balance in reading and movies vs numbing myself out with Netflix. Thanks for shining a light and helping me connect the dots for myself 🙏

For anyone who is interested in cognitive psychology, children who teach themselves how to read are actually using decoding skills (pattern recognition) that are different from the skills used to learn how to read with assistance. They also tend to struggle with pronunciation, because decoding is separate from phonics. The story of bright children having to teach themselves due to a lack of support isn’t as rare as people think. It’s a great example of resilience in children.

Hey all, gotta run, but… in addition to this, there will be a Patreon-Exclusive episode: Villain Therapy for TRUNCHBULL! Coming in the next few days!

Great thing to watch right before the hard work day! Super needed! Thank you Jono and Alan and the cinema therapy team! This channel is the best! I mention you guys sometimes in my therapy sessions I've learned so much from you guys and my therapist. Plus I get to nerd out!

Black Widow of friends 😂

All still alive

Yay that was fun, so glad I could make it.

Alan we capped out at 97!! So close!! Great episode everyone!

More future drops! I loved this!!

💚

This was awesome!!! Thank y'all for Drops!!!

Great episode guys!! 👏

🤍🤍🤍 yayyy

Application of EQ! Good self-management. Love it

Frankl FTW!! haha

I appreciate that Jono is always realistic about the dangers of standing up for yourself. It is much more helpful than people who set you up for potential failure with no warning because that causes more harm.

Alan: what am emotion? Good things not bad things? Jono: I not only understand what you're getting at but will expand in a way everyone wants

Pam Ferris’s physicality is incredible

From omg I'm gonna die to whoohooo this is fun.

I love watching Alan try to put words to what we know or want to ask, and knowing exactly what he means even if it comes out in a tangle 🤍

Holy crap guys. Are there going to be 100 of us watching this by the end?

“The great stories help you through your hardship.” Amen! There are certain books and movies that became my guidelines on navigating hardship

I am giggling, because in the Twilight books/movies Carlisle has love and compassion as his literal superpower lol.

😆😆 the edits are so good. In every episode.

Elsa from Frozen should be an X- man according to HISHE too

I love Miss Honey's little house. It is so cute and cozy! She deserves her dad's house for sure and I'm glad she gets it but man I love that little house

Like soooo many, I spent 40 years thoroughly believing my superpowers were my problems.

Oh boy, practice not crying at work! (I 100% expected the emotions and trauma work with this movie)

I ended up like Ms. Honey. Being a teacher and then a counselor.

Alan literally answering a question I've had my whole life

Cool knowledge drop Alan! Love it!

When I rewatched this recently, the fact that Trunchbull murdered her own brother for a house reminded me that Dahl has always been super dark.

I agree

Revenge stories are great and I love when the message that revenge isn't worth it is told as well. Last of us 2 anyone?

The Punisher but just against animal abusers

I love when Jono has these types of insights: The hero is fun to watch, but not good to actually emulate…

I love that we bring John Wick into Matilda

When you finally find the courage to say the thing you want to, regret inevitably follows

This movie was perfectly cast

A teacher that reminders me of her*

yesssss it *is* your reality

I had a teacher in the 2nd grade. He wasn't that bad, but he was close.

Is that even legal 5 hours after school haha

Why did no one ever turn this principle in?

I have three best friends, to clarify. Alan is friends with the other two. We've made movies all together. I'm not burning through bros, just fyi

Danny Devito such a treasure and hilarious.

That shot reminds me of John Candy and the giant steak in the Great Outdoors

I wonder if this scene was the inspiration for the scene in How I met your mother with the wedding cake

When you skip merrily to lunch

She’s called Pam?!

Omg that Bull of a woman I was so scared of her.

I came from a good family home and because of bullying from other kids and a family member I struggle with my self image. I am trying to get better with therapy but man it is the hardest thing to learn

It makes Trunchball very scary. It’s like she’s in your face screaming at you.

Jono here. Sorry I'm late!

Learning self love as a kid but not perfecting the skill till your an adult 👍

Already so sucked into Mara’s performance. What a talented young lady.

I was a movies kid (instead of books) bc dyslexia.

My kids have started saying “dip face” a LOT. Also, I KNOW Whit Hertford. Lived here in Utah for awhile and worked in the industry. Cool guy!

Ohhh!!! I remember this film from when I was in elementary school. I was able to watch the whole thing since I was not at home or the theaters. I never knew the title ether so I couldn’t look it up later on. I thank you guys for shining the light on this film.😊

I was a "books" kid! I consider myself a storyteller kind of person now

Alan do you always have that sparkle in your pocket for emergencies?

Like movies‽ I would never 👀

That is an amazing library 😍

As someone who loves to read this is so relatable

She’s Brooks from Shawshank

I’m listening on my Raycon earbuds I got for a discount cuz of my favorite internet dads! 😍

Imagine playing Trunchbull AND aunt Marge

Hello Mr. Internet dad Sir 😁

Aww matilda!!! Such a good movie!

I made it!! Yay!

WHOA! Hey 50 friends! Jono is on his way, he’ll be here in moments.

3rd best 😂

Well it’s nice to be on the list 🤣

I remember reading the books as a kid

I like that idea

You guys ever think of making these episodes a podcast? I always listen to the episodes while I clean.

Yay

I'm excited for this one! Matilda was one of my favorites growing up. It took years to get "Send me on my way" out of my head.😅

Darn, I have a class then.

Dare I dream/hope that Mara will be a guest in this episode??

Yay! That's my birthday! ☺️🎂

I swear if they have Mara on as a guest 😍

And the story behind the scenes with the real life actors will make your heart burst into tears so get ready!#cryingwithalan

The squeal I squelt ❤️🙌🏻😂