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July 4, 2026

Stop me if you've heard this one before

Back in 2005 I was asked by the agency who then sold space on scarygoround.com (imagine such heights, an ad agency!) if I would like to swap a month's run of ads for a page in Los Bros Hernandez' legendary B&W indie comic Love & Rockets.

I jumped at the chance. Jaime Hernandez is one of my favourite cartoonists, and his brother Gilbert may have his knockers but it's hard to say he doesn't have a formidable body of work.

But this was 2005. What kind of "creative" was I going to use to fill a page of this mag? The ad had to be black and white, and all my work was in colour - back in those days it really fell apart without it.

So I did the only thing I could: I went through Domenic Priore's "Look Listen Vibrate Smile", a 1993 book which exhaustively collates all the magazine writing, advertising and editorial around the Beach Boys' then-unreleased Smile LP, until I found what I was looking for...

...then I just transcribed it almost exactly.

Of all the esoteric artistic decisions I have made in my career, this remains one of my favourites. I knew that this ad would look incongruous unless the reader knew exactly what they were looking at, which I reasoned would probably be a maximum of three people. In the twenty years since, I've met one person who saw it - possibly a decade plus later - and knew what it referenced. And I like to think of the person at Fantagraphics who laid out the book looking at it and going, "what is this shit?" Then, as now, I was incapable of playing the game.

______

Footnote: in writing this post today, I looked up the original ad. It was actually in colour? Blew me mind. I still put this record on sometimes, the first song is three songs and it still thrills me.

Comments (18)

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Richard Holland · August 19, 2026

John if you are ever in Chicago and want to have several hours of boring conversation I would be delighted to discuss Smile with you. Few records I have ever obsessed over as hard as that one. Many many physical copies, boot, the multi disk sets of session, the official box set, at least 3 or 4 books,

C
Chris J. Zähller · July 7, 2026

Fantastic!

D
Dean Reilly · July 5, 2026

Didn't Tim have a nephew or something named Van Dyke?

A
Anthony Thompson · July 4, 2026

Premium Hanes Beefy T image option when

A
Andrew · July 4, 2026

What other long games is John playing… time capsules? A series of letters held for conditional release, that refer to long out of print publications? I can’t wait.

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Sean · July 4, 2026

I think their recent collected edition of the first 50 has all the original adverts as well, so you may find it lives on

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Charles Place · July 4, 2026

Shelly's just sitting there and judging you like my daughter's chinchilla. Love it.

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Zakrael · July 4, 2026

I think you may actually be an absolute master of the game - just not necessarily the same game other people are playing...

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Matt Howl · July 4, 2026

I love this so much.

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Rian Murphy · July 4, 2026

On the contrary, John. You have always played the game on a rare and delightful level. How did i miss that? I'm gonna have to pull out my back issues nd find that ish...

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John Allison · July 4, 2026

I tried to reply to this once but Patreon ate my comment and I can't remember the smert werds I said. But thanks Rian, this one's for you.

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William Cole · July 4, 2026

Yours is a deeper and superior game, Jon.

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N. Forsythe · July 4, 2026

Did he ever consider making a line of winter coats and marketing them as "Van Dyke Parkas"? No? Ah well,

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N. Forsythe · July 4, 2026

What an interesting use of the word "generic".

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William Cole · July 4, 2026

The entire ad copy is "interesting". The thinking that went into hyping a record as "uncommonly predictable, inevitable, inescapable" is utterly alien to me.

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Pete Ashton · July 4, 2026

"Gilbert may have his knockers" Oh John. Not while I'm drinking tea, OK?

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Andrea Burgess · July 4, 2026

"a formidable body"... I shall join you in going "JOHN."

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Tudza · July 4, 2026

Good decision to not have the girl cover her face with her fist like the model picture guy does.