PATRON EP. 69 (nice 😎)

Turn your wifi off on your phone and porn hub will still work in your state

In this episode two idiots can't comprehend why incomprihensible things would be scary.

Sam's, let me know if you need anything 3D printed or any of the files. I work at a print farm and can help out. We also do resin printing which is tougher and higher resolution!

Bring us the vessel

Hey guys what happened to the latest episode... patreon is broken and that l looked like an i

Hope your doing good we love you so much and I hope you have a great day and Fuck these guys post when everything is settled down and love-your self that comes first you make great content - stalltt make another vid we like the last one

Day 17: HOLY SHIT THEY JUST POSTED AS I WAS ABOUT TO TYPE ANOTHER LONG RANT

I want addresses, these boys need talking to

Just saw you post a video Sam. So here’s the deal, either you post a podcast by tomorrow. or I drive my car into a brick wall going 70 mph after, I take the airbags out. And you lose one of your few female patrons.

Dope as hell, cant wait for the next one.

Poop is mega faggot level gay now

Zharrgrim will hear about this

All around me are familiar faces Worn out places, worn out faces Bright and early for the daily races Going nowhere, going nowhere Their tears are filling up their glasses No expression, no expression Hide my head, I wanna drown my sorrow No tomorrow, no tomorrow And I find it kind of funny I find it kind of sad The dreams in which I'm dying Are the best I've ever had I find it hard to tell you I find it hard to take When people run in circles, it's a very, very Mad world, mad world Children waiting for the day they feel good Happy birthday, happy birthday And I feel the way that every child should Sit and listen, sit and listen Went to school and I was very nervous No one knew me, no one knew me "Hello, teacher! Tell me, what's my lesson?" Look right through me, look right through me And I find it kind of funny I find it kind of sad The dreams in which I'm dying Are the best I've ever had I find it hard to tell you I find it hard to take When people run in circles, it's a very, very Mad world, mad world

I'm getting ready to perform a fucking hex on you two WHERES MY SLOP

Glad to see I’m not the only one annoyed they haven’t delivered any of the goods we fucking pay for.

They enjoy watching us beg every month

Can I get half a podcast cuz? Fuck w me on half a podcast nbs. I'm thirsty. I need it! Slop man. Slop man, please! I'm thirsty! I'm ready! I'm trying to pour up! Slop man, please!

Yeah where’s our dose of garbage?

Slop question mark?!

Sam’s grandma clearly has passed onto the great beyond and we should be more considerate as to why these freeloaders haven’t posted an episode in over two weeks

i say we all die in our sleep and they come back to poverty

This is not cash money. I need my fix

if the both of you are not in a coma then we will put you in one

you guys know this is like your actual job right?

getting withdrawals worse than when i quit cock for exactly three hours

God damn it’s been over 2 weeks what am I paying you guys for

Didn’t know NK nuked Florida… damn this was a good podcast.

Day 16: Still no signs of a new Forehead Fables Podcast. I keep checking the Patreon every few hours for some reason... which is ultimately pointless since I have email notifications turned on & I would know almost immediately if there was any fresh audible slop uploaded to this otherwise quite barren platform. Maybe I just find comfort in reading the comments? The days have started to blend together. How am I meant to do the dishes, laundry, & other mundane tasks without the Sam duo bantering in my ears? I've been thinking about listening to the podcast over from the beginning just to have something to listen to so that I can be more productive again. Although that does concern me in a way & I don't mean to be graphic... But I fear that might be like eating already digested food again for sustenance... if you catch my drift. Sam & Sam may you please end my suffering? Whether it be by uploading a new podcast or by personally choking me out (totally not in a kinky way). Otherwise, I fear I may only have a small amount of time left before my inner demons take me out. That would certainly be a distasteful way for things to end but I think I can go at least one more day or maybe even a week under the right conditions. Fellow patrons wish me luck as I will do the same for you. As for Sam & Sam... I hope my message may reach you before the final hour... whenever that might be.

I feel like Billy from buffalo 66

The guy who visited the white house the other day was from Indiana. Has anyone heard from Poob recently?

Another December 2022 moment, no episode until the 18th let’s go

Upload now or face consequences

Please release another I’ve been suffering for two weeks at work 😭

Any of you boys get signed out of patreon? I did and if i recall there was an issue a while ago where they did not know their password. Might have somethin to do with the late upload

I didn't want a podcast episode anyway!!!!!!

The last time they were this behind there was a major death in the family. Hope all is well

Another day without our slop, thanks obama

Keep edging me

I'm going to have to start drinking pretty have to fill the void, thanks guys

If you don’t upload I’m going to kill myself

They just love making us wait

How am i supposed to screen max while im doing the dishes if i have nothing to watch? I've resorted to plastic silverware and paper plates.

the first package is in transit and will only be called off if you upload.

hurry up you retards

UPLOAD NOW

i feel like a dog scratching at my owners door waiting for this damn podcast

Bro I've been scathing like a fiend for the next one, seriously the only podcast I listen to

Alright everyone you may now tweak out they missed the time frame… again

I’m glad I’m not alone in craving another episode to drop why must they treat us this way 😭

Another month not knowing when a podcast is coming, will they keep on neglecting me who knows. The cycle of abuse continues

I have an itch and it must be scratched boys

sam recognizing opening up to anyone as giving them "ammo" has never changed over the years and gives us a view into his true psyche

You guys should try to get Small Brained American on the pod.

When bizzle coming back

Got forklift certified today

How am I supposed to safely drive my 18 wheeler when my eyes are on my screen refreshing for a new episode

next episode tomorrow, the people inside the walls told me screenshot this

I’m about to work a dog at 1 and these goobers still haven’t put up the episode. I’m supposed to work a dog without two voices in my head???

This happens every month and we complain and threaten to leave. But we don't leave instead we wait in annoyance until the 20th of the month for the first ep. Then we grovel until the last day of the month waiting and begging even though we always get it on the last possible second. A 1:40 of what feels like a mandated conversation. (not blaming stalltt) I just wish you guys spread them out more

crawling upside down on poob's ceiling and screaming into his face every night the podcast isn't uploaded (i also pee a little bit into his mouth and he gurgles on it between yelling in absolute terror)

I’m gonna naw on Sam’s face like the end of a chicken bone if it’s not out by tomorrow

Fellas, can we at least agree on which half of the month?

Uhhh hello lazy fuckers what are we paying you for get to work

Never realized why people complained bout these upload times, now that I'm paying for em in getting it

Tap.. tap.. tap..

I’m impatient I’m ready for this months next episode boys

Guys don't be alarmed but I have reason to believe that poobs real name might be Sam

Marsh Diggler - my friend and colleague - has advised me that he enjoyed this episode

Great job as always boys 8/10

That shits actually pissing me you ruined my day

Is Sam so retarded that he thought C-3PO is R2-D2

Mash potatoes burgers and gravy is an Irish thing how the hell did the yanks get it?!?

Please buy the Skyrim slot for sheckelstein

Thanks stalltt

I just want both sams to compare abs

Next time you go hiking and bring said goats make sure to put Aquas face on each one

More slop

Stick to the mundane voice we understand

Give us another bizzle episode

Was this not supposed to be the heist episode?

Y’all should look at guests like Coffeezilla or Professor Dave explains if you’re doing Youtubers. Both of them expose frauds. Coffeezilla focuses on scams in general, and professor dave focuses on pseudoscience frauds. Both of them have some epic takedowns on grifters and are pretty good at roasting said grifters.

I wish these cavemen gooners would use opera and stfu abt the porn ban it’s not even a hard problem to work around they’re just retarded

How is Poob just gonna glaze over the fact that his family found the podcast. WHAT THE HELL MAN, PATRONS WANT THE STORY! ❤️

Thanks for spoiling blade runner for me guys

wait wait wair, is poobs gf name also abby?? sam and abby x2??

Would love to see Sam and poob play baldurs gate 3 together to replace my fix for die of laughter

did you soak the venison in buttermilk before cooking it? i've done that with the deer I got last season and it works like a charm

I don’t give a shit about “selling the product” with the ad reads. It’s just that’s the monotone stuttering is painful to listen through

if sam figures if he can wheeze loud enough and long enough after every joke he could gaslight all of us into thinking they're actually funny

yo sam’s, check out the yards ad reads if you want to integrate them into the fact you’re a comedy podcast

Ed Kemper would’ve loved this podcast back when he was trucking

we NEED bryan’s cocks on the podcast we men of higher education need the mental stimulation

Did the big one have to call the little one slurs so many times? Why can’t we just be nice

Naked pod plz

OTR truck driver here fuck train guys there pussys

Positively delicious my dear boy

Noice

Listening while playing American Truck Simulator for the authentic Forehead Fables experience. I must say it is sublime

I like your ad reads poob don’t worry

This is the slop I’m here for

Hey hey nice one boss

reread the mountains of madness its a lot better and descriptive than you gave it credit for

Friday Bootime Gamers

Perfect for my last few hours at the warehouse. Am I right Bryan?

Yyyyyeeeeaaaaaaah

C3p0 in a saw machine is sadistic

Mmm... I can sense this will be a most delectable serving of slop. My senses tingle at the mere thought of the wonders that await them behind the small obstacle known as 'The Play Button'. I certainly will be a productive member of society whilst consuming this exquisite slop & I WILL NOT GOON. That I can guarantee with the highest degree of certainty. 🤞

calling off the snipers

just hopped in the peterbuilt. thanks stalltt

Nice job boys(stalltt)

Hopping in the big rig now. Thanks twink and Jew boy.

We need that truck simulator podcast fellas. Hop to it 💪

nice 😎

All these people listening while they are at work. I just got off a 2AM shift and NOW you post. Feelsbadman

Once again we all say in perfect unison: "Thank you Stalltt"

Early episode? ❌ Episode within 10 hours of the next month starting? 😎

Thank you boys for this Friday post. I’ll be able to do a part of my shift now

Truckers unite

Pooping my pants

the perfect medicine for my sick day off work

Shiver me timbers they got it in with .3 on the clock💯💯💯

Just in time for my drive back from Chicago

Hell frickin yeah buddy! Happy Friday!!

perfect timing, just clocked in

A great way to end the work week

What a treat