The 2023 Direct-to-Netflix Kevin Hart Vehicle ‘Lift’
The gang watched Lift, a movie where Kevin Hart plays a gentleman thief who lives in the Battersea Sky Pool building. Also, it contains the line: “I paid my $22m… I want my NFT.”
Comments (82)
Discovering now that there is a movie where someone hacks the MOSE and a police boat on Venice - peak fantasy
Tom cruise is 5”7 3/4 Kevin hart is 5”2 1/2 according to celeb heights the standard repository of all knowledge and wisdom
All this time I was hoping that the bit was "We didn't record this episode but are going to make you think we did" instead of what I knew to be "We recorded the episode and will very obviously lie that we didn't" because now I have heard the episode and I know that everything about it is stupid and netflix will continue to be a going concern in spite of all the wasted humanity to make it and the world is finally proven unambiguously unjust.
If nominative determinism was real, Burn Gorman would only play characters who end up dying in horrific explosions
"Cousin Roland with the Tenga egg came" - King Lear, act 3, scene 4, line 195
It was shot in Belfast and I am an extra in a few scenes. I was being bullied at work and was very depressed. The experience lifted by spirits.
Saying "lift" not "steal" is like remembering to say "November" and not "Alice"
burn gorman was born in the US but his parents were english and he moved to england when he was 7. you can tell he’s not american cause he is an actor, while an american named burn gorman would be a republican state senator in the south.
November needs the interpol windbreaker from the 2023 Direct-to-Netflix Kevin Hart Vehicle ‘Lift’
Big Shortman is a Kojima character and you won't convince me otherwise
I mean I just thought Interpol was a Post Punk band.
betrayal aside, every time nova says something bad about one of the actors in this film i just imagine abi thorn feeling a cold chill pass through her
The gang should watch The Beekeeper after this. Similarly shite writing but fun
Big Shortman is a side character in the next Death Stranding with an inexplicable backstory about how the beach makes his height unmeasurable or some shit.
The beach that morphs you into the world's shortest giant
What is caviar but the Tenga of the sea.
🇮🇹🤌🤌we canta arrest th’ man! ees against the rules of eetaly 🤌🤌🇮🇹
The emergency glass has been broken. The life vest film has been inflated as the vacation plane crashes into the sea, 5 meters from the coastal shelf.
I'm sorry Sir this is a Wendys
Hold up...none of that inflated movie budget got spent on acquiring REAL AUTHENTIC NFTs for shooting, did it? Don't tell me no one's that dumb, one of my qanon relatives now gone flatearth, drinks their own piss and believes it heals their skin....you better bloody believe people are that dumb lol!
Huh so this isn't the one where Kevin teams up with wheelchair Bryan Cranston for suspected saccharine trite movie-bonding shenanigans 🤨 Well the vague recollection of a single unappealing Hart film just did a metaphysical mitosis and split into 2 after hearing this. Gonna need more drugs am afraid.
Wait I thought y’all weren’t gonna watch this, ever??? 😱😱😱
Hussein gave me a moment of Horror thinking they got J Groff for this movie
I was really surprised to see this movie wasn't spelt Lyft
The lead up to this has been so long that I genuinely did not think this episode was real.
This is the Trashfuture equivalent of Well there's your problem "next episode is (famous disaster)". But instead of doing it in a live show, they slow rolled it for 3 months. Well done team.
I am fond of the bit about how 9/11 should really be called 11/9; I just want to add that there's a *great* follow up joke to be had in referring to the fall of the Berlin Wall as "European 9/11", because that did in fact happen on the 9th of November
Lost joke from the berlin live show
Eez a good egg/cunt e iz
ACtually the 2023 Kevin Hart vehicle is a Tesla
I did not look up 'the 2023 Direct-to-Netflix Kevin Hart Vehicle "Lift"' until today, so for some reason, I had it in my head that this was a movie somehow based on the rideshare app 'lyft'.
they said it couldn't be done
I'VE BEEN DUPED. HAD. LIED TO. I FEEL BETRAYED AND I MAY NEVER TRUST AGAIN
I feel lied to
what the FUCK
this is obviously a bait and switch, wherein the 2023 Direct-To-Netflix Kevin Hart Vehicle "Lift" is simply a bit. Haven't listened but I believe this fully
Feeling so much better about myself because I watched the whole of both Obliterated and The Gentlemen but crucially not Lift.
I also can't believe that they made the lagoon less equitable.
Tom Cruise has been photographed with his notoriously short friend David Miscavige, however…
t h e e g g
The thing I appreciate about Tenga is that they're abstract and do not try to look like body parts.
Does November also own the Avatar branded makeup kit?
big shortman is a kojima ass name
Counterfeit fake god tungsten ingots are actually readily available I think
And that this movie got a $100 million budget and no one in the writer's room thought that iron ingots painted gold was a bit weird I feel represents Netflix in a microcosm. The plane probably has a sensor if there's a massive weight and balance shift all of sudden for safety reasons.
this cant be….
Wait a minute, are they talking about the 2023 Direct-to-Netflix Kevin Hart Vehicle ‘Lift’?
This is how the podcast ends This is how the podcast ends This is how the podcast ends Not with a 24 hour Neom-a-thon, but with a Kevin Hart direct to DVD action/comedy commentary track
Feel like a james somerton fan , so betrayed , they said they would never do it.
Ahhh, now to eat a nice big spoonfull of breakfast cereal and see what the topic of this week's Trashfuture is...
We love a 5’2 king
I am shocked and appalled
Every time you mentioned the Kevin hart vehicle lift I thought it would be spelled lyft
And to think my day started learning about Habsburg con in Texas https://thebaffler.com/latest/feeling-blessed-hooks
Fuck...the day is here and I'm...I'm just not ready for it. I can't be the man which the episode of Trashfuture where they watch the 2023 direct-to-Netflix Kevin Hart vehicle Lift needs me to be. I'm just not strong enough.
Perfect timing on this, I’m about to ‘lift’ up on a flight, can’t wait to listen
🎶I hate every bored ape I see, from NFA to NFT🎶
They predicted the event!
A shocking U-turn
Top 10 anime betrayals
OMG
This is Riley and the gang blinking at the camera about their hostage situation
IT'S HAPPENING
I'm skipping work
I can't believe the woke mob forced them to watch this movie after all.
The prophecy is fulfilled,,
No! No!!
i never thought the day would come when Trashfuture reviewed the 2023 direct to netflix kevin hart vehicle "lift" but here we are
is this some sort of code to indicate that you have been kidnapped?
This better be a prank.... I cannot believe you would be the kind of podcast to watch the 2023 direct-to-Netflix Kevin Hart vehicle Lift...
They said it couldn't be done
Things are about to get LIFTed.
they said they'd never do it.. so much for the tolerant left..
It's here! Can't wait to find out if they watch it!
utterly bamboozled. taken for a ride
Dog cunts, liars, HOONING ON MY HEART LIKE THAT!
egg cunts, even!
LIARS!!!!!!! You said you’d never do this yet here we are……. No more pocket money for you!!!!!!
no way!
In lifting the first comment, and you can't stop me
Get in there!!!!
Also the egg cunt line was from in the loop (the thick of it spin off film)