A Curse Upon Thee 2-22

For all its vaunted softness, Egyptian cotton was suffocating.

Regina Mills opened her eyes from beneath the sheets, pulling them down from her head to stare up at the ceiling. Barely an inch of morning light made its way in through the blackout drapes, the sterile hum of the HVAC filtering into the room serving as the real marker of morning. 

She lay perfectly still on her hand-chosen high-thread-count sheets, the artistry of immaculate crown molding visible even with barely-there lighting. 

Twenty-eight years of literal absolute authority in Storybrooke meant twenty-eight years of meticulously customizing her environment to fit her exacting tastes, and her former office was no exception; the adjoining suite hidden inside City Hall her secondary fortress.

A king-sized bed made entirely of mahogany to match her desk, a luxurious bathroom complete with sunken soaking tub and rainfall shower and — of course — a walk-in closet worthy of the title of a guest room.

This was the hidden annex attached directly to the mayor’s office — the same luxurious, hermetically sealed suite she had been sleeping in almost every single night since the wraith had attacked.

Undeniably hers, it was her home away from home.

And, over the last two weeks, it had simply become her home.

Her eyes slid shut again, irritation and restlessness burning in her chest as she grunted into a pillow. What’s the point? She barely saw a reason to leave her bed anymore, what with her life’s work, career, and family in shambles.

All she had known for the last thirty or so years of her life was blocked off to her, her demesne in the clumsy hands of an idiot farmboy.

And, in all the man’s greed, he hadn’t seen fit to simply stop there.

No, those clumsy mitts of his had gone for her son as well; Henry already eager to become a heroic knight that would make his ‘grandpa’ proud.

There was a reason she had been aggressive with her needle-prodding of David; anything to get him to claim the office. As pathetic as it sounded, she desperately needed an excuse to be evicted from it. All David had to do was as he had always done, in this realm and the last, as he had with everything else.

Just take it from her.

And it wasn’t like she would fight him.

Oh, she could, of course.

But then, she could simply burn the whole town down around her if she wanted to.

It wouldn’t fix anything.

What was the point of an office without authority, after all? Just a gilded cage that reminded her of everything she had lost. So, was it too much to expect an external force to simply act? Was it too greedy to need a tangible demand to leave the building and return to spending time in the sprawling, empty silence of her actual house on Mifflin Street? 

But then again… What’s the point without him there?

Throwing the heavy duvet off her body, and the sheets along with it, Regina’s bare feet hit the chilled hardwood. She forced herself through the motions of a shower — scalding water flushing her skin a strong pink as it beat down on her shoulders.

She may have had no life to speak of but she had at least two things to take care of; fix her magic, and heal her son. 

And to do the second, she knew exactly who she needed to find.

One hand turned the water off, leaving a nude Regina standing in steam. I need that vagrant.

– o – o – o – o – o – o – o –

“Effie.”

The bell above the glass door of Ursa Majors chimed aloud, the sound cheerful and cloying.

Regina Mills stepped over the threshold, her bespoke blazer snapping sharply around her hips as she stepped into the fifth business of the morning; patience long gone.

Eucalyptus and crushed lavender scented air greeted her; nothing unappealing but certainly nothing that eased Regina’s mood either as she walked further in. Behind the quartz reception desk sat one Aura Whitley; the round-faced blonde a portrait of over-maintained pastel perfection in a sickening cream-and-pink cardigan.

"Hi there!” Salon-neat ringlets wreathed a pair of dimpled cheeks, both indentations visible as the girl lit up with fake cheer as soon as she heard the door. “Welcome to Ursa Majors Day Spa and Salon, how can I—"

All that bubbliness fell away to nothing as a pair of blue eyes focused, the pop in her voice softening into a small-town weariness as she quickly found something to distract her. "Oh. Uh. Um… Ms Mills. I..” Manicured fingers suddenly started fluttering over her keyboard. “Just... just give me one sec, ma’am, let me save this file."

"I don't have a second to spare, Goldilocks." The girl physically flinched at the sound of her old name as the once-mayor stepped even closer, cold authority in all three syllables. "I need an answer."

"Okay, ma’am.” The smile on the girl’s face plastered itself back on, girlish vowels stretching thinly as she was forced to look up at the risk of being rude. “ Um, okay, do you have an appointment? We’re a little booked up this morning, but I ca—”

"Effie." Regina had little intention of waiting for the girl to stumble and stammer her way through a sentence, dark eyes narrowed as she dropped the name again. “Have you seen Effie?”

“Effie?” Soft features scrunched up as the girl rose to her feet, nervous hands smoothing out her cardigan. "Like... the homeless lady who sleeps near the pharmacy? I mean, no? We don’t exactly get a lot of foot traffic from her in the salon, Ms. Mills. Why would she be here?"

“I didn’t ask if she was here.” Regina’s temper sparked with the snap of her words. She planted her hands flat on the desk, leaning forward into the girl’s space until Aura leaned back. “I asked if you saw the vagrant.”

The strained smile on the girl’s face finally dissolved in full, defensive nerves fighting front-desk training. “I mean, no. Not lately. We don't exactly get a lot of foot traffic like that around the salon, Ms. Mills.”

“Uh, hey babe.”

The door chimed again, saving Aura from the sharp edge of Regina’s withering glare.

"Ma said that the inventory for the mud masks is running low or whatever."

The voice was a goofy boom that filled the front space of the salon, the owner a 6’3” wall of dirty blonde mass more than muscle, all of it held back by a strained red flannel. The round boyish face over all of it was topped off with a mop of shaggy blonde hair that managed to make him look even younger than he already was.

“Truck’s running weird too and pa’s being a tool about it for some reason.” The man didn’t even seem to notice her, oblivious to the tension in the room as he lumbered right past Regina while thinking out loud. “I’ll ask Leroy to take a look at it.”

One massive arm wrapped itself around Aura’s waist, a loud sloppy kiss placed firmly on her forehead. As the girl softened in his hold, one hand resting on his oversized forearm, the big man finally blinked up as a pair of warm blue eyes came to rest on Regina. "Oh, hey. What’s up, Queenie?"

Regina’s spine went to steel, anger molten in her chest and new magic flaring with it. "Excuse me?"

"Uh, yeah, no, I mean..." The man backtracked immediately, a nervous laugh spilling out as his pitch jumped up. "Wait, what? I just meant... force of habit? From, you know, before? The Enchanted Forest stuff?"

Regina clicked her tongue, the sound sharp as a snapping twig in the quiet spa. Hm. She looked the overgrown flannel-wearing arctanthrope up and down before finding all she had to say. 

"Bear."

 "I mean, it's Barrett, actually. Legally, here.” Baby Bear shifted where he stood, an embarrassingly sincere look worn almost proudly as he rubbed at the back of his neck. “Owen Barrett. But, uh, what can we you for?"

Sickening. At least in the forest, the Bear family were to be respected if controlled; a threat in size, power and ferality. Yet a lifetime domestication had done to them as it had done to Goldilocks and so many others, neutering them of a certain spark. I suppose that lies at my feet then, too.

Irritated even further by her own self-inflicted irritation, Regina ignored the correction. "Bear."

Owen simply shrugged. “...sure.”

Chin raised, she met the werebear in the eye."Have you seen a homeless woman named Effie wandering around this morning?"

"Wait, what? The crazy lady?" The big man ambled into the thought, brow furrowing as he looked down at Aura. "Yeah, no. I mean... I haven't seen her around the square, babe. Have you?"

"Not since the purple smoke." Aura crossed her arms over her cardigan, lips pursed as she looked back at Regina. "Are we done here, Ms. Mills?"

Look who’s confident again with her muscle present.

"Quite.” Regina turned on her heel. "Do try not to break any of the salon equipment with those clumsy paws, Bear. It would be a tragedy to ruin the aesthetic."

“...Ma says hi by the way.”

Eye twitching, Regina didn’t bother even turning around at those parting words, simply pushing back out into the late morning Maine air.

– o – o – o – o – o – o – o –

The rest of the day was an exercise in systematic humiliation, the sun long surrendering to the dark by the time she pulled into the driveway of 108 Mifflin.

She killed the engine, sitting in the leather seat for a long moment as the manor loomed in the dark. I just want to sleep.

She’d walked the length of Main Street till her heels bruised the pavement; suspicious glares making up the majority of her day. Leave it to Charming to embolden the peasants. With their ‘hero’ as mayor, the town was feeling rather sure of themselves, doing everything short of directly challenging her wherever she went.

Even when all she had was a simple question. Maddening.

If it wasn’t the judging eyes of that pinched-faced Blue Fairy and her flock at the convent, it was the annoying dwarves or so may others; the pharmacy, the hardware store, and even that irritating diner. 

Regardless of the disrespect, she asked for Effie everywhere she went and got nothing but confusion atop the suspicion.

Why is the Evil Queen looking for the town vagrant?, was the whisper she heard with her back turned. Regina provided no follow-up and offered no explanations to the undeserving. 

Unfortunately, she wasn’t sure if that was the right decision when she ended up with nothing to show for her efforts. Sighing, Regina Mills finally unlocked the front door of her house. Home again.

But for how long?

That was the question, wasn’t it?

With a sigh, she let her keys fall onto the polished entryway table, ambient moonlight filtering through the tall windows as she closed and locked the door behind her. An entire day spent chasing a ghost, and Henry was running out of time. I need a glass of wine.

Slipping her heels off, she carried them both in one hand as she made her way across the plush carpet of the living room, intending to do nothing more than drink herself to sleep on her plush white sofa.

Unfortunately, someone was already there.

The scent hit her first; her private reserve of Pinot Noir — a heavy oaky vintage she saved for occasions worthy of a migraine.

Who dares? Free hand forming into a claw, magic condensed into a blood-red light as Regina’s eyes tracked through the dimness until they came to a stop on the sofa.

"Regina..." 

The voice rolled through the quiet room, a smoky purr that only made the magic in her right hand burn brighter.

A striking blonde lounged across the expensive upholstery, white leather stark against a black robe that Regina intimately knew as hers. One of Regina’s crystal wine glasses was held loosely in a set of pale fingers, the deep red vintage a contrast to black-painted nails manicured and edged to a point.

"It's been so long.” The woman on her couch took a slow, deliberate sip of the wine. “How's life treating you, darling?”

Regina stayed silent as she watched the stranger swirl the dark red wine. "I wish I could tell you how it's been for me. But I’m afraid almost thirty years as a schizophrenic, muttering old vagrant living out of a shopping cart have been absolute murder on my memory."

Regina stood rooted to the carpet, breath emptied from her lungs as her mind worked at a pace that had the rest of her frozen in comparison. How?

The face was entirely different, younger undoubtedly. 

The unwashed grime of 'Effie' the homeless woman was completely gone, replaced by a striking flawless bone structure that was vaguely familiar but at the same time entirely strange. 

Despite all that, the voice — arrogant, mocking, effortlessly superior — remained unmistakable.

Red light winking out, Regina finally let her heels drop from her hand. 

They hit the floor with a dull thud as she let out a long ragged sigh, decorum entirely abandoning her as she looked the dragon in the eye.

"...hello, Maleficent."