Natural Enemy 2-8B

“YOU’LL NEVA GET A CENT OFFA ME!”

The shout hammered the air, loud enough to rattle the rigging as Kai’s eyes went wide. The footstep that followed it hit harder though, enough to make the entire galleon shudder. The deck tilted, Kai barely keeping his balance as the entire thing jerked as the anchor chose that exact moment to drop. 

The door to the captain’s cabin burst open faster than he could blink, wood exploding outward at all once. Splinters flew like shrapnel, Kai immediately ducking low as the heavy oak frame flew over his head; the entire thing reduced to toothpicks as it shattered against the far railing near the ship’s helm.

His eyes darted back from the mess of wood to where it came from, breath coming as fast as his eyes blinked. …Jesus Christ.

Barely a full second later, a shape stepped through the wreckage of what used to be a doorframe, ducking under it before standing tall.

Jesus Christ… Kai blinked slow as the thought repeated in his head like a prayer, water dripping from his hat as he tried — and failed — to close his mouth at the sight of what he could only call a monster. If that’s Barnacle Bill, someone needs to get fired.

The poster was a straight lie. 

A bad joke, even. 

A doodle drawn by a blind man in the darkest room ever. The sketch above the name had shown a big guy with a hook and a beard, almost a generic cartoon pirate. 

This… this wasn’t at all generic. What the hell, man?

While he wasn’t all that tall or all that buff, Bill was definitely broad, the pirate captain built like two or three barrels stacked side by side and wrapped tight with duct tape. His skin was red and leathery, what little of it Kai could make out. But past that, there wasn’t much skin to even see, with most of it gone. The pirate’s body was more sealife than flesh, sunburnt skin fused with clusters of hard red shells that crusted over the man’s shoulders, chest, and legs.

Are those…

Barnacles.

They were barnacles, just like the man’s name, jagged ang angry looking things. All over his body, beneath and on top of his clothes like a set of armor; if armor both grew out of you and swallowed you whole like a jagged living reef.

“A tadpole?” Bill’s voice boomed loud, sounding more like a normal pirate than the rest of him looked as he swung that huge calcified scythe of barnacle shell thicker than Kai’s thigh he probably called a hook. The half-man, half-reef laughed loud, tangled nightmare beard hiding his mouth as he took another step forward. “A little tadpole thinks he can flood my ship?”

Chill, be chill. Kai swallowed, chest heaving as he wiped sea spray from his eyes, doing his best to ignore his heart trying to rabbit-kick itself out of the cage of his ribs. Just a crab man. His feet stayed planted, knees locked as he stared up at the monster-man bearing down on him. Just a big crab with a beard.

“..I ain’t a tadpole."

Bill laughed again. “Come here, little fish. Let me shuck you.”

The pirate charged.

It wasn’t a run, more a lumbering motion that carried him forward with pure momentum; a waterlogged landslide learning to walk. But that momentum built like a beast and Bill covered ground terrifyingly fast even as the deck planks groaned and bowed under the weight.

Kai raised a hand, two fingers pointed as he grabbed the moisture hanging heavy on the waterlogged deck. In barely a second, it compressed instantly in between the tips of both index and pointer.

A dense high-pressure slug of water. Bang.

Blue shot forward as Kai let it fly, fast enough that it was a blur to the naked eye.

That same blue hit Bill square in the middle of his chest, dead-center on a cluster of thick, red barnacles with a simple plink.

The water bullet shattered into spray, the shell not even cracked or chipped as Bill kept charging straight at him. “Kasu Kasu no…”

Blue eyes widened. Uh oh.

“Krab Klaw!” Bill swung the barnacle-battered weapon, the thing looking heavy enough to anchor a whole ship on its own.

Kai dodged — barely. The wind of the swing ruffled his hat as he threw himself hard to the left, sandals sliding on wet wood as he scrambled for safety. Sawdust and splinters peppered his back like grapeshot as the club smashed into the railing behind him, pulverizing the seasoned hardwood into confetti.

Holy—

Kai scurried back, the teenager putting distance between himself and the walking reef.

Bill didn't stop, the big bastard not even slowing down as he stepped over the few men that couldn’t get out of the way. He just kept coming, turning around with all the grace of a fully-loaded cement truck as he followed afet Kai.

One heavy, stomping step at a time.

Okay, legs. Take out the legs. Kai’s hands thrust out, water pulled from the puddles on the deck again, shaping itself right between both his open palms. It swirled for a good second, compressed as tight as he could make it before — “Water Gun: Stream Shot!” — he launched a stream of high-pressure water, a fire hose blast aimed right at Bill’s thick, crusted cankles.

Bill didn't even stumble as Kai’s streams did nothing. He waded through the force of the blast, water not even wobbling the barnacle-head as it broke uselessly against his shins. 

“Tickles.”

The pirate grunted as he reached out with his hook hand.

It came in low, a jagged red blur aimed to gut Kai like a fish.

Kai dropped, going low as the hook whistled past and almost taking everything above his neck with it. Now! With a grunt, Kai lunged up inside Bill’s guard and drove a heavy fist of his own into Bill’s stomach, all his weight behind it.

Nnngghhh! Pain shot right up his arm, hot and sharp as his knuckles screamed at him inside the glove. All his weight behind it and he might as well have been punching a mountain covered in sandpaper. 

He pulled his hand back, shaking it as he tried his best to see through watering eyes. Ow. Ow ow ow.

A set of teeth that looked like broken rocks, gums so gray they were almost black, grinned down at him. “My turn.”

Bill brought his other hand down, a fist encased in a thick knobby shell built like a Thanksgiving turkey.

Arms went up, instinct forcing a block. “Nnnghhh!”

Have you ever been stupid enough to try to catch something heavy, some insane idea of your own strength or just your own dumb brain not moving fast enough? Kai regretted it as quickly as he did the punch from before as the impact drove him into the deck. “Gah!” A gasp tore itself free from his throat, pile-driver force taking any words he had to give as his knees slammed hard into the wet wood, planks cracking loudly beneath his shins.

Bill raised his foot, the massive black boot also covered in barnacles.

N-no! Kai threw himself sideways, body rolling across the shattered planks before he scrambled across the deck on hands and knees, no different than a crab on a hot rock. Bill’s crewmates didn’t even bother to fight with him, all the ones that could move running for cover as their captain’s boot stomped down right where Kai’s chest had been. Wood splintered with a wet crunch and the deck had a new hole straight through it. 

The teenager jumped up, already backing away as his breath wheezed in his throat. Not like the Grime Brothers. Not like the Grimes Brothers. That much should have been obvious from the beginning, even before he got here. The Grimes had been one-and-a-half million each and they weren’t entirely easy to take down. This guy…

“Still running, boy?”

This monster was worth about four whole Grimes in one body.

“The hell even are you?” Kai found his voice finally, breath coming easier now as he fought to keep his balance on the already listing ship, and the first thing he did was throw an insult. “What kinda monster did you crawl out of, man?”

“I ate the Crust-Crust Fruit!” Bill pulled his foot out of the hole with a grunt and a squeal of tearing wood as the pirate captain bellowed even louder than he had before. “I’m a Barnacle Man! Nothing breaks me! I’m the rock the waves break on!”

Wait, what? Kai blinked, mouth hanging up. “A Devil Fruit?”

Despite being chatty otherwise, Barnacle Bill didn’t really seem to be in a question-answering mood, considering he just charged at him again.

This is what those Devil Fruits do to people. Kai backpedaled, circling the mast as he eyed Bill’s monstrous body. “I thought…” He had thought Devil Fruits just gave out like powers, normal powers, but this was a… No, don’t call anybody a freak. 

Teeth gritted, Kai fired out again, drawing up water again as quickly as he could. Puddles surged together again, a blue construct barely the size of his chest forming as quickly as it leaked water; a fist of water, but barely full size.

No time to aim. 

All force, he swung out and the flying punch of water followed. He fired out again with a heavy, flying punch of water. “Breaker Fist Jr!”

It hit Bill square in the face.

The pirate captain’s head snapped back… maybe an inch, two at best, before he shook it off with a grin. “That it, boy?” Bill spat a glob of seawater onto the deck. “That all your fancy Fruit can do to a true man of the sea? Kasu Kasu no…”

Bill stomped. “Kurrent Kage!”

The deck jumped beneath Kai’s feet, red crust shooting out from Bill’s foot like a video on fast-forward as barnacles spread across the wood. Each one hardened instantly, turning the planks into a jagged uneven mess of black-and-red spikes.

Kai jumped back, sandals catching on a patch of barnacle crust as his eyes went wide. Crap. A crusty forearm swung back and caught him in the chest with all the force of a speeding car, Bill’s laugh loud in his ears as the world spun over and over.

Ow. Pain exploded in his ribs as he hit the deck like a stone. “Nnng-!” White lights danced in his vision, the taste of blood in his mouth as he bit his tongue on the second skip across the wet gangplanks. “Ahh-!” 

The scream on his tongue went nowhere, the world bright and blinding as he hit something, wood thick enough to break his fall and nearly thick enough to break his spine with it. Fuu- 

Kai gasped, trying to suck in air even as it felt like a belt was tightening around his chest. Get up. Get up.

“Gonna squash you.” The heavy thud of crusty boots only got louder with each stomp from the pirate captain. “Gonna make you into paste and feed ya to my crew!”

Y-yeah, no! Kai scrambled up on shaky legs, not entirely sure Bill was joking and that was motivation enough. Another stream of water shot from cupped palms at Bill’s feet again, a desperate blast trying to unsteady the immovable pirate.

Bill just planted his legs, the man like an anchor in shallow water.

C’mon! Kai dug deep, pushing his reserves into the water drawn from around him. Freshwater overtook the salt as he gritted his teeth, the stream blasting harder and faster.

“Wha-!” The big man with the Devil Fruit grunted, eyes wide as the Stream Shot pushed him back; not a stumble, but enough that the man couldn’t even take another step. "You little worthless mollusk! Kasu Kasu no Krab Karapace!”

And if that wasn’t enough, the shells on Bill’s body shifted, interlocking with a bunch of heavy clack-clack-clacks until Kai found himself staring down a heavy tank of red calcium.

A heavy tank with a beard standing barely more than a half-dozen feet away, arms spread wide and waiting. “End of the line, guppy!” 

Kai pressed back further against the railing, wood digging into his spine as his eyes jerked over to the sea where his skiff waited but… Six million. The number flashed in his head, a siren call of seven figures. That’s your money and it’s standing right in front of you.

His gaze slid back over to the orange-and-blue boat sitting on the sea, an idea coming back to him as he remembered his favorite character and one simple fact. Ninjas beat pirates.

Kai held out his right hand, drawing on something he’d practiced for years now. Something that had never really worked, unlike the Stream Shot. It was unstable, it was messy, and it usually exploded in his face.

Which made it perfect.

Water started to spin, Kai already pulling from everything he had left; every drop of moisture in, on, and around him as a sphere began to form in his palm. Spin. Hold. Spin.

The jagged churning violent ball of liquid chaos formed quickly, the thing spinning so fast it let out a high-pitched hiss of a whine. Air warped around his hand as water droplets flew off it like bullets, friction scraping at his palm through the glove and stinging his own face.

Stable? No. Dangerous? Hell to the yes.

Bill laughed as he lunged, that heavy hooked hang closing in. “NOW DIE!” 

“YOU FIRST! Kai planted his feet and thrust his hand forward, shoving the spinning, screaming sphere of water right into the center of Bill’s chest-shell. “SPIRAL BOMBER!”

The sphere hit the shell.

For a split second, nothing happened.

Then, the rotation bit.

The sound was a scream; a high-pitched screech of destruction as the water cut like a diamond drill. It chewed through the barnacles, the calcium, and the bone in a high-pitched scream of destruction.

Bill’s eyes went wide, the grin vanishing.

And then…

CRACK!