D&D Court: Pilfered Portents, Hidden Ents and The Great Food Truck Race

For future me, you can skip to around the 11 minute mark to avoid listening to a case that shouldn't have taken more than a minute. Or to 13:55 if you're okay skipping all the tasty little bits during the denouement. Or like skip to uhhhhh 22ish to avoid another case that shouldn't have taken more than a minute can be skipped but then the bit at 15:45 is also delicious, but also there's a delightful convo at 19:50. Future me, what a tough position you're in trying to farm this for bits while trying to skip everything you know me to be silly. There is no player nerf going on in the ent case, the court and the players are mad about a stat block in a game they agreed to play, that's on them. Murph says the solve is often to have different friends, and he's right, but the other solve is that people shouldn't be playing 5e just cause it's popular, that's no basis to play with such a complicated (and badly edited) system

Commenting to inform everyone that on this day, Wednesday June 24th the year of our lord 2026, I was at subway and the radio was playing what I can assume with full confidence to be the "youth of a nation" song they sing every episode. It felt like like spotting the white whale while in the bath

I'm beginning to think all the water haters just live in places with bad water. your body has failed you if after millions of years of evolution you hate one of the number 1 things you need to survive

please make sure you’re getting electrolytes with your water! too much water in one go is not the way to do it. Murph is correct! little sips throughout the day. electrolytes are the way to stay hydrated. sodium, magnesium, calcium, and potassium

I love this podcast and there are so many good bits, surprise meat Twix nearly killed me as I was listening at work. Cannot express how badly I needed to laugh that hard, thank you for all the laughs!

Murph’s low “yeah” when he is in pastor confession hearing mode are so good and on point.

If your in the same as Emily about water try liquid death sparkling water. The crew need to do a one shot where they are all different birds lol and Murph can finally be his city pigeon self

I love Emily’s hemp milk call and response song so much. It’s a great blend of “give me a _______”, and “when I say ________, you say _______”. Always gives me a chuckle when I relisten.

none pizza left beef

Im like 85% sure that the player WAS running beside Cinnamon. Because the wording was "you won't double the speed, but you'll have advantage on checks to soothe her because she's happy to have a friend". As in, she's happy there's another direjackalope there running with her.

Did anyone else notice that the Tree Ent question was directly about The Adventure Zone Petals to the Medal?!? It was about Taako and Trent the tree ent!

Amazing

Hoptea in Boulder! Love that stuff, their “brewery” is right behind my old apartment.

Cue me running to the comments to see if there are any other taz people

WATER IS GROSS? Emily, I'm with you through thick and thin, but you gotta fuckin hydrate

Yes. Please come to Kansas City.

I 100% agree with Emily. Water is gross and I am said that I need it to live. Why can't I just stick with tea, Sprite zero and and flavored sparkling water in an emergency?

I'm with Emily, I'm always dehydrated and I wish I could just have it put into my body, without having to actualy drink.

Shoutout to Jake for proper pronunciation of "Kan-city"

Sorry but this tree Ent reminds me of the scene from The Adventure Zone, petals to the metal ark.... Anyone else know what I'm talking about?

If it doesn't feel impactful enough you can allow them to add a plus one

In regards to the cinnamon case I would like to propose the addition of a simple new mechanic where in five below half speed 15 above double speed rest equals normal

The Dasani water calculator told me 32 glasses per day... 🤔

The treant case is literally a major scene from TAZ: Balance. I do remember being upset about that 20 not being honored properly. Oh well, Trent got his ass chopped

Come to Kansas City please that would be awesome! (Also I love that you guys know tommy Siegel, I’ve met him at a couple jukebox the ghost shows, he’s very nice)

Big woof with Jake conflating Ireland and the UK. They are separate states with a huge history of Ireland being colonised for 800 years by the British... not that I would hold it against that handsome Prince but you wouldn't want to make that mistake in Ireland.....

Portent on advantage rolls - I would also rule as Murph did. One of the two rolls becomes a 1. This is how we do luck checks and halfling luck as well.

Emily (and Jake) I think that you were both over hydrating. This is something that I am guilty of and my doctor has insisted that I limit the number of glasses of water a drink per day. My anxiety probably drives me to drink more water and then what is considered normal healthy and even at my current 12 glasses a day my doctors would rather I reduce down further. Also the standard definition of a glass (250ml) is a lot smaller than what I first thought.

No frogs were harmed in the making of this - you can't harm the willing. 😅

The water problem seems very millennial to me lol. Gen Z kids carry water bottles everywhere (lesson: Murph an old soul, he's a very young soul??)

Drinking a glass of water in the morning is a punishment and I appreciate Emily for bringing this to the court's attention. Also a delight anytime Murph says 'worter' ((water))

As a farrier/ blacksmith id be happy to have that dm work with me for the day as there punishment

https://youtu.be/OWASUMMQjj8 an Adam Ruins Everything ep about hydration! you’re right to hate chugging water emily, there’s no online calculator that’s better at knowing how much you should drink than your own thirst

For mixed bag can we please get some British food reviews? British fast food? British breakfast? Give me a British gas station energy drink review I need it

Emily's water boredom reminds me of the XKCD comic that basically tells us there is no scientific consensus on how much water we should drink. The best advice is, if you're thirsty, drink water. Most people drink about a liter. https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/1708:_Dehydration

Emily should watch the episode about football in Adam Ruins Everything. TL:DR Basically, you should drink when your thirsty.

Go Costco. I say as I prepare to clock in to my shift at costco

God, Murph’s former Catholicism is too relatable

As someone who solely drinks water I'd like to argue that water is good

Dang I gotta hook y’all up with my 86 oz big ass water bottle with a shoulder strap it has a straw and I suck that shit down no problem

Absolutely batshit insane that Emily says water is gross while drinking Kombucha

I'll just say this. When it comes to team draft animals emily is very right, if the oxen, or jackalopes in this case, need to work as a team which takes time. The bigger issue is the rigging on the food wagon. A single horse cart is not set up to hitch a team to. Sing carts has parallel shift that go on both side of the animal. A team wagon has a single shaft that goes between the animals.

I’m so on board with Emily’s opinion of water lol get us all hooked up to an IV drip so we don’t have to worry about it! Though an interesting thing I’ve discovered is get yourself a small cup. Weirdly, I find myself craving it more when I have a small cup I have to keep refilling. And I feel more accomplished when I lose track of how many cups I’ve drank, compared to a giant water bottle that I only get through 1/4 of and then I get mad at myself lol

I'm really loving the slowly emerging segment of Murph's DM Sweat Lodge. Pour a little water on the hot rocks, steam up the room and lets hear more panicking DM cases, I'm here for the sweat!

Emily you’re not supposed to water board yourself! It’s supposed to be throughout the day!

I bet the second Case’s Treant was named Trent. Campaign seems familiar lol.

Water's good.

LET HER SPEAK. SHES RIGHT. WATER IS GROSS

Emily makes a really good point with the sync up part because you can't just add an animal mid race. You have to have the right equipment and can't hook it up mid movement

I know that the "big water" comment was a joke, but it's not far from the truth. Nestle water and its subsidiaries actually have funded some of the fear-mongering stories that people aren't drinking enough water. Those studies also have serious problems with the way they measure dehydration, so they end up pathologizing results that are completely normal in order to sell more bottled water.

Mbmbam explains why horse friends have more power than lone wolf horses (not to do with speed, but still fascinating!!!) https://youtu.be/y765TOFKk_M

The case about nat ones in Avernus was interesting, because having nonmagical weapons break on nat 1s is a suggestion in the adventure under "Life in The Nine Hells" on how to impart that Avernus is miserable and torturous, although the DM seems to have increased it to two nat 1s. It also suggests that food tastes like ash and water tastes like bile, undercutting successes with small backsteps like snapping your favorite belt or getting rewarded for doing evil tasks. That's probably the context of the DMs rule. With that said, it's a fine line between being in an in game miserable context and feeling like it's unfair and not fun for you as a player, so every table should discuss what level of day to day in game misery they're comfortable with. If I ran the campaign, I'd maybe have most looted weapons be cursed and corrupted and most uncorrupted weapons be very expensive. As to not hinder the players and give them options but still imparting a sense that nothing in Avernus is permanent or to be trusted.

Water is 100% gross. There's a reason why there's a billion different drinks that are just different ways of making water tolerable. Emily speaks truth

I agree with Emily! Water is gross!!

It literally states "indistinguishable". You cannot perception find a mimic. You cannot perception find a treant. You would need arcana or nature to find them. Not going to happen with perception. D&D is all about how you approach things, a nat 20 perception does not give you cross over into arcana and nature and shit like that.

We need to get Justice Oyama back because the court has drifted far too north.

I agree with Emily- water is gross!

I will drink my water and rewrite my campaign to add more Cinnamon. Humbly deserving and I thank you

You only need to drink water when you're thirsty none of that 8 glasses a day or x ounces stuff matters your body is the only indicator that matters

A bank with unusual plant growth? A tree in the lobby? Sometimes just doing a one for one Adventure Zone. But also I guess no one on the show listens to Adventure Zone? Because I'm sure they would have recognized this pretty quick if they did listen to it

I understand the dms perspective in the treent it does say imperceptible in the ability description as in cannot be perceived. However a nat 20 should be honored. I'd say do something in the middle. Maybe they are surprised but the treent has disadvantage on attacks for the surprise round or they get an AC bonus for it or something

Also re: the jackalope question I think you guys might have misread the question. To me it sounds like both Cinnamon and the Druid ended up pulling the cart together, the DM just didn’t give it the mechanical effect of boosting the cart’s speed.

I agree, water sucks. I like to stick to the frost series of Gatorade, personally.

Emily the average woman only needs 2.7 liters through out the day not all at once. It also varies based on how much physical activity you are undertaking and how hot it is where you are at. There's also many other factors, also you can just drink when your thirsty

Any liquid you intake is hydration. It is of course better to drink straight water. I make like super cold and have a great thermos. Cold cold cold water. Just sipping throughout the day.

Took a nutrition class and you are supposed to drink half of your body weight in fl oz of water

I could have sworn that one of you was in the Adam Ruins Everything about water consumption myths.

I really hate when people try to add critical fumbles to Nat 1 attack rolls. Congrats you auto miss this attack and now I am going to punish you even more based on something that has a 5% chance of happening. Also lets make martial characters even worse by punishing them for rolling Nat 1s while spellcasters just continue to be awesome. It really just rubs me the wrong way, I am sure there is a cool and fair way to do it, but I have never seen it.

You are supposed to drink half your weight in ounces in water a day

Just like everything in life, I improve my water by teabagging it . Aside from that the motions of the sea preferably stay away from my gullet

Am I the only person who actually likes drinking water wtf

You think anyone chopped the butt off that treant?

I’m SO with Justice Axford, water is a garbage liquid and really, really have to force it down to be even slightly healthy. Mineral water helps, and lemons.

RE: treants, I've been looking up lots of plant creatures for a campaign I'm running for my friends where we have an established theme of unpredictable nature and a character who always looks for plants, and I noticed that a lot of Monster Manual plant monsters just say that they're indistinguishable from normal plants unless they move, but a new Wild Beyond the Witchlight treant variant can be noticed with a DC 18 investigation, which made me think this has been like a big known issue and I've decided that that's what I'll use for all plants who aren't deliberately rolling stealth.

Water IS gross. I stand with Emily 100 %.

Emily, get your cordial game on. Water in take is important. There is a great brand in Australia called Bickfords. Also check out a soda stream if you don't have one. It carbonates your water at home and pays off in the long run. Get both together, then you get a hydration party happening! Also, as someone who was a kid and grew watching it, your wind in the willows mixed bag was one of the funniest things I have ever listened to. You guys should check out a show called The Animals of Fathering Wood. It was a super depressing critter focused British children's show.

Don't let the folks at r/hydrohomies hear this one

On the subject of the jackalope race, I replace movement speed with a movement skill and it makes situations like this so much better (and even combat in theater of the mind). I wrote a whole article about it at www.chappythoughts.com

Someone is running Petals To The Metal!

Dun dun.

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