D&D Court: Dramatic Dice Trays, Enrazzment, and The Family Fun Mix

Fritos can be made into walking tacos: add all the fillings you would add to a taco and eat with a fork

What i dont understand is why the "DMs pet" was the one yelled at for a DMs ruling. The other player jumped on someone who asked a question and got an answer and I know its not that serious but I know I wouldnt be happy abt being shamed like that

This person is just pre rolling his dice, how is it any different than pre rolling d20s

I am here to represent Funyuns as a first choice in those boxes

Is Caldwell doing an Alan (from Smiling Friends) impression at 31:15???

I agree that dice tower edgelord isn't cheating but he sounds so impossibly insufferable I literally wouldn't play at the table with him lmao

So now rolling out of order is fine? And dismissing the roll is bad? I can’t keep up with the ever shifting winds of the court

The dice tower case, it feels against the spirit of the game. It would be like pre rolling a bunch of dice and recording the results then using them in order.

That snack case, that would be like bringing a snack that no one wants/eats and then saying he doesn't have to bring next week because he can bring his left over casserole dish again.

The DM is edging with the cold rolls.

Caldwell did we go to the same school? My 5th grade science teacher did the exact same trick to explain calories and also different states of matter

Leaving my first comment ever to say that I’m 100% on vorpal sword guy’s side here - sure the DM is finagling to let the guy keep his sword, but it’s also already been nerfed and can’t one shot. They already were playing outside the rules, and we’re talking about a character who can’t do anything getting effectively one shot by the sorcerer vs a guy who can just do the same spell again on his next turn. Justice for vorpal sword guy, he was not the DM’s favorite even before the game began, the DM just wanted him to be able to participate in the fight.

Welcome to the nightmare verse bounty hunter peppermint patty

I feel Ricky Gervais would make a good adult Charlie Brown

It’s def worth mentioning that The Fritos in the Family Fun pack are “Honey BBQ twists” which are genuinely the most horrific shape or chip to exist. They’re all crunch and sharp with none of the normal frito satisfaction. So while I don’t love the Funyun shade, I do think John is a dick simply for implying that the Fritos twists even count as food. They’re not—they’re torture devices for the roof of your mouth

Crab cake on a burger would be good

I'm sitting here furious - furious! - that a joke like "low elf-esteem" could be made unacknowledged. I've literally stopped what I'm doing to complain, and it's late and my phone needs charged.

Caldwell’s good old Charlie Brown joke was so good

But what if John can't afford snacks every DnD session? Things are so incredibly expensive nowadays and the judges didn't take that into consideration

The box roll was never gonna be dramatic, at best, they get a 19/20 and the wind is still sucked out of the room, it would just feel sucky and disappointing to roll again and fail. Like the failure wouldn't feel deserved and all you did is watch a guy roll into a box

Wouldn't that dice tray thing be annoying when you have to roll with advantage or disadvantage? How would you roll the second die without bumping the first one?

Disarming does work well in BG3 because you can just loot their weapon and book it, not sure how that would work out on a real table though

justice for john

Bring back Surprise Round, this episode has a mini one and I miss it.

Funions over fritos for life

How did yall not clock Caldwell saying “waters for crit-ers” - A tier joke

how has murph gone so long without seeing the costco chip samplers ???

I'm gonna go to bat for the vorpal sword player for an entirely different reason here. Not only does Telepathy not allow you to control other creatures like what happened in the story, it's not even allowed for sorcerers! This combat encounter was bunk from the start by a min-maxer who doesn't respect the sanctity of the institution as a way to bring up less experienced parties and help your fellow man.

Caldwell peeping zaps voodoo chips has raised his faction points imo

does anyone know if the first few episodes of dungeon court are on the patreon? i can't find them in the collection and i don't have spotify or apple music so i'm always wondering where exactly flip a dvd comes from LOL

I love the weird gravity of the waiting dice. Knowing that the roll is there, waiting for you, whatever it may be. Is strangely compelling

With the inclusion of the Dice tower sect of the church I feel like we need to collect the previous church opinions into a religious text

CALDWELL - with regards to "there has to be something fun to do with the leftover Fritos bags." Emily almost had it with the individual Frito pies. The answer is Walking Tacos. John just needs to bring a Tupperware of taco meat/fixing & everyone can scoop them into the individual bags and munch on that.

Currently using three small (4") skillets to cook buttermilk biscuits from the DND cookbook while listening to this 🧇

The "DM's pet" thing has got to be copying a @ZachTheBold skit, thought of committing so hard when no one else knows the ref had me dying lol

I think the Dragon familiar should have used a REACTION not an OPPORTUNITY ATTACK and it would've solved a lot of issues.

First time I disagree with the Dice Church Representatives. I was yelling "BLASPHEMY!" and wondering if that meant I am splitting from the church. Then they said they're maybe excommunicated from the Dice Pope. Does that mean... am I... Dice Catholic?

The "covered pre rolled dice" confession is so strange but it's like the schism of Catholicism and Eastern Orthodoxy. Because it's not wrong it's just odd and not practical but not technically wrong or illegal.. very interesting cosmological or philosophical difference. But damn .he's not wrong

Love "when did Bradley Cooper come out"

Voodoo chips mentioned, a man of fine taste.

If I don’t hear more defense about Funyuns I’m going to scream

Yelling DM’s pet is genuinely insane behavior

I'm shocked that this episode doesn't say anything about the fearsome Peanuts Gang featured so heavily... lmao

Chesapeake Bay burger — available at restaurants in Tidewater VA. Blue-crab crab cake on a burger: delicious.

John should be eating his fritos and funyuns that he obviously knows no one else is eating. Him not touching those chips and eating others while also not paying for more chips is fucked up.

Caldwell mentions Sparky multiple times when talking about the Peanuts. Can anybody explain this, or is it just one of those Caldwell things that he throws out there with no context and never gets addressed?

Before I listen to short rest, I’m guessing Em rolled an 18.

For the surf and turf burger question, as a Marylander, crab on a burger is not uncommon here. Chicken Chesapeake sandwich is also bomb.

On the topic of seafood burgers: one of the best "burgers" I've had was a filet of salmon on a burger bun with burger toppings. It was a specialty burger place and I kind of expected it to be ground into a patty, but no it was just a slice awkwardly in the middle of a much bigger bun lol. It was very tasty though. So yes, seafood burgers are real and good.

First time commenting. Rule lawyer the pvp fight the spell cant effect anything being worn or carried so dm just let the pet do it to fix that mistake !!!

The Naddpod nightmare-verse has been in need of some female rep. I think Peppermint Patty (with a tiny skillet) is what we needed

Wait Murph is finally allowing Emily to wear bucket hats?

Brian “Of Two Minds” Murphy

The wizard of many faces case is SO buck wild and I just keep thinking of more things wrong with it. Like, if they're switching to martial classes are they suddenly trying to play a barbarian with a zero strength modifier or is this person presumably also saying their base stats get to change whenever they want them to? Also if I'm gonna be completely pedantic, once they've changed classes and they're not a wizard anymore how exactly are they switching back. But mostly I just think it's such a shitty move socially. It would SUCK being in a party with this player. My two cents for the punishment for that one, when Peppermint Patty comes to beat them she should change classes every couple minutes to keep beating them up in new and exciting ways.

this wizard who wanted to interchange between every class and subclass is just a less refined version of Kaeldros from campaign 3 of The Homebrew, Under the Cracked Sky. Only difference is Kaeldros had a resource he had to expend to change his character and it was randomized AND it was in a campaign of VERY experienced players and not a first time DM. This dude just wanted to be a worse Kaeldros

John's advocate, to solve the problem of him rebringing the same stuff, it sounds like someone just needs to house a bunch of funyuns to exhaust his supply so he has to bring something new... Not too big a burden!

How could the Telepathy spell make the ranger throw his Vorpal Sword?

I actually think Dice Tower Weirdo is a badass. Imagine if God handed you a piece of paper telling you how well your next major decision would go and this guy isn't even tempted in the slightest. The amount of restraint it would take to simply ignore the gift of premonition is an insane thing to put yourself through for no reason other than 1 second of efficiency. This dude is resigned to his faith in ways Kierkegaard could only dream about.

Yall should do a Mixed Bag reviewing the Boys series finale! They totally stole Murphy idea!

Just learned that I’m going to be headed to a wedding in UK the week after the London show so I’m going to fly out early and attend. So glad there were still a few left!

I think the dude bringing individual packs needs to let it go. Eat the ones people didn’t want at home? Like why are you being so sassy about this, it’s not like they made you buy this specific snack and now refuse to eat it. They consumed their snack and now you get to eat or deal With whatever’s left. You arent absolved of contributing forever bc no one wants to eat the cast off chips.

I just had a similar chip issue with my group, no drama though. My roomie convinced me to get the spicy chip assortment and nobody ate ANY of the spicy chips but him. The assortment is still sitting in my living room

Don’t know why flat-caps get all the shade they do. I have a few classy Irish-made ones and bust them out from time to time. But truthfully they do look better on 63-year old dudes. Also welcome to your 40’s Caldwell! All my 40-year olds give me a Calloh-Callay!

I think with the confession made to dice christ at the end, it's essentially acting as pre rolling your dice to save time, something talked about as a good practice. It seems like the person with the dice tower was essentially doing that but with all their d20 rolls instead of strictly damage or attack rolls. Is it odd? yes, especially since it doesn't seem like the character has anything that eats up time or takes some time to calculate, but not a sin for sure.

The suspense of that mystery dice roll...

Did Murph think John was bringing 50 Full Sized bags of chips to DND Night everyday week??

RE: Surf & Turf Burgers I used to work at the Grand Floridian Cafe. I made hundreds if not thousands of lobster burgers while I was there. It was years ago and they don't have it anymore because $$$$, but I believe it was: 7oz Beef Patty Gruyere Cheese Butter Poached Lobster Hollandaise Sauce Brioche Bun

I play a limited multi-character that I would definitely recommend. It's similar to what the honorable judges recommended: She's a life cleric who was a child assassin in her past, so she can change into an assassin rogue with a different character sheet and stats to reflect it. MOST IMPORTANTLY the DM decides when (not without my permission) and there are consequences - like not being able to heal, which is important to her story as well as to the party. I can't flip back and forth willy nilly. She's one of my favorite characters. It's a really fun way to play, both for variety of mechanics and for story.

The rolling in advance and revealing is psychotic. In a pivotal moment where the dm says something like, “ok you need a 15 to not fall into this pit and die” and then the player just lifts the paper to reveal a 6 or even a nat20 the drama just isn’t there.

The Left Over Chips: you just gotta "eat" those chips in between sessions.

I’d listen to Caldwell’s Bobby O voice read ANYTHING

Because my case helped create such a wonderful Bob Odenkirk idea I’d like to enter a plea deal to get my ass kicked by Linus.

The variety packs always include more Fritos than any other chip tbh

Don't hate this Schrödingers dice move. Not my style but kinda cool.

thank you for stopping jake from starting for us in the back emily

Closest thing I can think of for seafood on a burger is Worcestershire sauce, either before cooking (not my style but fully acceptable) or as an ingredient in special sauce.

Re: the crowded church fight, I’ve also been the DM who, after setting up fight, placing the minis, pointing to things on the map, and still *every round* of combat having to explain the battle to the guy who’s been texting the whole time and the other one who’s trying to pay attention but isn’t super bright. I can’t help but wonder how many times the status of the crowd in the church was actually said out loud before the AOE was cast.

I’m calling my boy Charlie now, we’re steamed

"Telepathy"

I have a baseball cap that says silly goose on the front and on the loose on the back where the ponytail hole is

Yoo Bob Odenkirk as Weapon Brown would be amazing

I was yelling at the audio that I wanted to hear the interesting hats! Thank you Emily. (I wore a bowler hat to school my whole Junior year of HS in 04-05. It was a strong choice.)

Toronto again please

PEPPERMINT PATTY WELCOME TO THE NADDPOD SHITIVERSE!!!

I was thiiiiis close to buying a rhinestones bucket hat today. I feel so seen

i’m currently on a plane and the elf bit made me laugh so hard that i legit started crying from my attempts to hold in my chuckles

happy belated birthday caldwell!! -a fellow taurus/may baby

With regards to the dice christ conundrum - I disagree. Each roll of the die is a holy roll of obligation, and in the same way that one could not frontload their mass attendance ie. Go to church every day for 52 days straight and then skip out for the rest of the year, one cannot skip the roll required in the moment by replacing it with a roll completed at a less holy time. Thanks for this platform to unpack some of my weird catholic upbringing stuff.

Peanuts has entered the naddpod universe

For future reference, I'd like to put forward that Peppermint Patty is either of the silent generation or of the boomer generation

Is John eating the unwanted chips or leaving them behind as well?

Totally here for the Church of Dice Christ Schism

I love how Murph got so tilted by the first question the other three had to adopt elementary school math teacher energy to calm him down 😂

Rare Murph snack L not knowing about the Costco chip pack

Im legit excited to see what the roll was. Is it a crazy way to roll? Absolutely. Does it offer a whole new type of suspense? ABSOLUTELY!

Absolute blasphemy. Dice Christ does not know what to bestow upon the roller until the DM calls for the roll as the situation develops. Yesterday’s dice IS NOT today’s dice.

NOT CALDWELL OFFHANDEDLY MENTIONING THE GOAT OF CHIPS AND GET IGNORED BY THE REST OF THE GROUP!!!🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 #voodoochips🔛🔝

Frito pie doesn’t need a skillet. You open the small bag of Fritos and add the fixings

You guys are yearning for Surprise Round I swear. Please a comeback!!!

Oh my lord I never knew how much i needed a a Parappa the rappa’ hat until now🥹🥹🥹

Caldwell is right, a bag of Zapp's Voodoo chips is the answer, that or maybe some Grippos

I’ve actually had a 13th level character cooked up who is multiclassed into each class by one level, basically the gimmick being that he is a drifter who hasn’t really found his way in life yet. The time hasn’t come to play it yet, but one day!

Old man with a page boy hat? Oh my dad. When you’re 63? Oh! My dad.

Absolute blasphemy. Not only is the person disconnected from the dice, but the dice are disconnected from the energy of the moment. If you rolled a die, then 30 minutes later attributed it to the final death blow to the man who killed your father? Atrocious.

We are graced with Caldwell’s Alan impression

I’m making a Funyun tower to celebrate the next hogliday season

I feel like the wizard of many faces should just not work. Okay, you have the ability to change your class on a long rest; great. So the first time you do that...you're not a wizard of many faces anymore, and you can't change your class again.

Enrazzment is god tier riffing comedy

The court has ruled correctly, however just eating a snack bag or 2 of funyuns gets this over with pretty easily

There's nothing like dnd court to make me super grateful for my players being actual adults that don't make me lick funyun dust and prep for 13 alternative classes 🤣

Perfect timing to emotionally support me through the dentist

Happy birthday Duncle Caldwell!

The most obvious solution to the first issue is adding someone in the party that likes those chips. Everyone wins.

Murph screaming in outrage audibly having to get up, and back away from the mic. THERE'S NO WAY!!!!! 50 BAGS?!

Yappy Girthday Duncle Caldwell!

The chip argument is the dumbest and funniest debate they've had since the croissant pool.

Gang, I’m with John the Bag Baron. He’s a pragmatist and groceries are expensive. Make ‘em suck the Funyun dust.

FUNYUNS ARE A GOD TIER SNACK

Funyuns are A-tier chips.

Second week in a row I can listen at drop! I might have to make a habit of staying up til 2 am on thursdays

Because Caldwell took responsibility and mentioned that it was his birthday I can now wish him a happy birthday

I love D&D court so much!

supremely excited to be so early to an episode!! 🧑‍⚖️🧑‍⚖️