D&D Court: Bonus Cases - The Great Croissant Debate

Murph’s Halloween-town made me laugh so hard i squeezed out a fart.

To be fair, a final destination style campaign where everything is trying to kill you in weird and random ways could be extremely fun

Too stupid... funny but I am distracted by lack of understanding of physics

Jumping 100 feet into anything is never going to be comfortable or safe for the average person. A deep foam pit full of croissants might be one of the less terrible options. The deciding factor is probably how squished the croissants at the bottom are by the weight on top. As is often the case, Murph is talking loudly and confidently out of his ass 😅

Am I the only one who doesn’t remember a dragon in The Rescuers?

Young Black Dragon with a broken wing you say? ....queues up Blackbird by the Beatles for the montage of the party nursing the dragon's broken wing ending in them riding it off into the night For the "there's always a bigger fish" scenario. Dude, you should've rolled with it and just added an even bigger, bigger monster that ate the bigger one! ...and then had it also swallow up the party and then have them fight inside the bigger-bigger one with some interesting environmental/terrain situations, and then the death of the bigger one causes it the bigger-bigger one to throw up and become disinterested and leave the party covered in throw up. For the Inn campaign. I'd recommend some of the Waterdeep: Dragon Heist resources as that campaign revolves around the party having an inn/tavern that they run. The official module has a good bit of resources, but there's a lot of 3rd party publications that expound the tavern-running aspect of it all.

The backwards kangol…did you know about the jfk jr show

I am am doing my maaters in physics, and to be honest, I think the croissants are so compressable, that in a large enough tub (croissant ocean??) They would take the fall. Hay is much safer than whater at some point as well, and I think that croissants and hay are close in structure

We need Hank Green for this question!

Jake unleashes the cultist voice from skaldova at 38:00, its my favorite

I hope Caldwell got to see Avatar 3 because it has way more Spider in it than the others.

I'm probably way late, but i thought i offer some thoughts/calculations regarding your croissant debate... y'all had me laughing so hard as I drove home from the grocery store that I thought I was going to have to pull over for the safety of the general public! 😂 First off, I'm coming right out and siding with Murph - as a rock climber, i've looked at 100 foot drops and ain't nobody with any sense jumping from that height into anything! That being said, Emily's faith in the air pockets of her beloved croissant left me wondering... would they save you? I'm a chemical engineer by education but I did have to take 3 years of physics plus Statics and Dynamics classes (back when y'all were little). If a 100 pound person (like Emily) fell from a 100 foot height, she would have 10,000 foot-pounds of Kenetic Energy when she hit the croissants. (The fall would take just under 2.5 seconds and she'd be moving 54 miles per hour). A foot-pound is the energy it takes to lift one pound one foot off the ground. So experiencing 1 foot-pound would be like dropping a 1 pound weight from 1 foot high. 10 foot pounds would be like dropping 1 pound from 10 feet high OR 10 pounds from 1 foot high... ergo, 10,000 foot-pounds is similar to dropping 1,000 pounds from a 10 foot height. (Let's put a pin in that) The Impact force exerted on a stopping object (Emily) is calculated by dividing the Kenetic energy (10,000 foot-pounds) by the stopping distance. So, if a 10 foot deep swimming pool were filled with croissants (or water or packing peanuts) and whatever you landed on stopped you RIGHT as you reached the bottom... you'd experience 1,000 pounds of force. (10,000 divided by 10) Something that weighs about 1,000 pounds (that Emily might be familiar with) is a Steinway model D Grand piano. Therefore, if Em is comfortable with someone lowering a Steinway Grand piano down on top of her as she lays on the floor and then cutting the rope, she's probably ready to jump? Personally, I'd pass. Ultimately, the question could boil down to "do you trust 10 feet of croissants to save you from a falling grand piano?" Regardless of whether y'all use these calculations s on the air, thanks for the laughs and the wonderful years of entertainment 🥰... been a listener and patreon member since September 2020. Saw y'all in Savanah Gerogia and had a great time. Keep on doing what y'all do!

The real looney toons question is how hard are the croissants? Are they all freshly from the oven and had a chance to cool so they’re not too hot nor too cold? Or are they all from a week long sit in a Starbucks display case with a tiny bit of mold? Will there be music playing or just the sound of Murphys protests? And also are the croissants plain or buttered? Is the butter vegan? Will there be a lifeguard and first aid or will these be on private property? And is bugs bunny taking notes? These questions plus about how big and long the pool is should answer the question: can you survive a 100 ft dive into a pool of croissants?

They could probably get Hank Green to answer the croissant debate

I never realized that Murph is actually the only sane one out of them until today

This is the best episode. congrats guys, have fun in retirement.

So... Short answer is technically you could. Long answer is more like, what are the dimensions of the pile/vessel containing the croissants? Basically if you could fill a pool the width and breadth of a catch net and make it twice as deep as it would have to be to catch you from a free-fall. BUT, the size of the croissants would also have to be bigger to make the space between them bigger to allow you to get slowed down at a rate that wouldnt just make the bread squish into a solid. Think about how much of a croissant you could push into a 1/2" socket before you can't fit anymore and it starts to push back out. You need enough empty space to accommodate your body entering the vessel so the croissants don't squeeze you back. But 100 feet into water people have literally done this week all over the world.(Probably not all of them are fine, I haven't checked)

Also I can’t believe Mr. “I Ate A Croissant A Day For Years” didn’t bring up his vast boots on the ground croissant knowledge and experience. Cowardly yet modest

I like how Caldwells frame of reference for rehabilitating the dragon with a broken wing was somehow the Rescuers and not How to Train your Dragon

Joana’s eggs on dungeon court was not on my bingo card

Having jumped into foam pits before, I think croissants would be pretty safe to fall into Probably not very comfortable though

Considering croissants are mostly air it really becomes a question of how deep the pool is. Because a croissant is basically an edible foam cube and foam pits are perfectly safe to jump into

The croissant discussion is exactly why i pay for this patron thank you for this

I’m actually an airbag scientist, we invented a croissant air bag that was 100x more effective than normal air bags. Unfortunately, the air bag lobbyists will never let it see the light of day

The only way to get to the bottom of this is to drop a basketball 100 feet into a pool of croissants, since basketballs, as we know, are like people

I cant explain how much I love the concept of a NADDPOD x Taskmaster crossover

I want them to do a one shot in Dark Souls Halloween Town

Look .... All I'm saying is dropout need to give these guys a sketch show again... Just 7 minutes skits build from dungeon court.... I just... Really want to see Murph, dressed as batman, buralising his players 😂😂😂

Murphs argument about penetrating through the croissants doesn't really make sense. If you had a pool full of small soft pillows, you wouldn't shoot through them either but it would be quite safe

You don't go through the croissants (which is Murphs strawman), the croissants collapse underneath you. It's literally a crumpoe zone in a car.

I normally agree with Murph, but he's way off base with the croissant thing. It was be 100x safer than water. Depending on how deep the pool is, it would be fairly safe honestly.

What are croissants but edible foam bits? As long as the croissants are deep enough to cancel out the momentum from falling you'd be fine

Sorry, Murph. You're wrong on this one. It's about density. Water is far more dense than croissants. Croissants are mostly air. We can all agree that toasted croissants = death

Absent DM in the Wizard/Ranger case!! Where was this DM? Did the wizard run this by the DM and they decided to hide it from the ranger? Why? Even if the character isn’t supposed to know, the player should, so they can be prepared. Wizard came up with a bad plan and presumably this DM okay’d it. Otherwise, they’re even worse for not stepping in and stopping this. Hold DMs accountable, Murph

Dark souls halloweentown had edgelord blood hunter energy

As long as the pool is deep enough that the croissants compressing against the bottom isn’t a factor, I’m pretty sure you’d be perfectly fine. I feel like there’s not a lot of better foods you could pick that are natural air bags, which is yknow, what we use to reduce impact

Ok I'm pretty sure you'd survive but rather than try to use AI that will just halluciate a solution. I'm making a simulation in blender of a guy falling into a pool of croissants and seeing if they'll survive. I'll try messing with the depth of the croissant pool and see if that changes if they survive or not. I'll update on progress as my computer struggles to simulate 1000 croissants filling the pool lol. Also I'm a biologist so also just take everything I'm doing with a grain of salt

The croissant conversation had me and my fiance arguing our whole 7 hour drive. Team Emily!!

Can't believe nobody posed a hypothetical about the outcome of having croissant walk cast on them

You would die so incredibly fast diving into croissants

Emily pleading saying "If it isnt toasted" has me cackling at work!

Didn’t know Murph was such a baby. Croissants talk exposed him. You’d be fine

The restaurant idea gives big Dave the Diver energy and I think I found my new campaign idea.

If it’s Dark souls Halloween town doesn’t that mean death is off the table? Death doesn’t mean much in those games. Sorry Murph you’re gonna have to take the tiny L on this one.

BIG D&D movie energy on this one 😂😂😂

My calculations are in your email for the 100 foot Costco croissant dive. But TL/DR, sadly Murph is wrong. Negating suffocation, it is survivable.

Wait -- I think with Water Walk, they would fall right through anyway: "An affected target must take a Bonus Action to pass from the liquid’s surface into the liquid itself and vice versa, but if the target falls into the liquid, the target passes through the surface into the liquid below." (from the DMG) (Also this ep was so funny 🤣)

I can’t believe Murph doesn’t know they aren’t toasted! SMH soooo embarrassing.

Not trying to be funny but Murph is wrong. A 100 ft fall doesn't put you anywhere near close to terminal velocity and so long as there where enough croissants, they would decelerate the fall more than enough for a safe landing. If you don't fall in a weird position you probably wouldn't even get hurt.

Murph thinks they're toasted

I agree with Emily about the croissant landing pad.

I would listen to an entire series of Dark Knight Halloween Town DM-ing where the gang tries to play the session and wiggle out of Murph continually trying to kill them. Had me cracking up the whole time.

The landing sounds possible but how do you get out without buoyancy? How deep do you go???

Theres not a fucking chance its possible to jump 100 feet into any baked goods and survive

fucking. at the gym and they said the words "jorkle horkle" thats a one hit KO. I look like an idiot here laughing with my headphones on. thank you that was hilarious

Yeaaaah Murph’s wrong. I am an engineer and an endlessly deep pile of croissants is a SIGNIFICANTLY safer landing pad than water. Honestly it probably ranks pretty high among literally all substances, almost certainly the best among baked goods at least! I cannot wait to hear Murph’s reaction to this comment section

I am an engineer. The croissants are better. Murph was so close with that example of the crumple zone on a car, but he incorrectly translated it to croissants. The goal of crumple zones is to increase how long it take for an impact to be transferred between two objects which means that the deceleration takes longer or that it happens over a greater distance. Let's consider a landing in each of the two extreme landing positions, feet first and body slam. In the case of landing in water or on concrete, those can both be considered to be incompressible. Concrete doesn't budge at all so the impact is instant or over a short distance and a landing on the belly or the feet would be disastrous. Water is also incompressible, but it's a liquid so it can move, however, in a high speed collision the water molecules move very slowly relative to your body and it makes very little difference if the impact force is spread out because the more water that has to move, the longer it takes. Landing on water feet first is much better because less water has to move and you can slip between the water molecules. The croissants would act similarly to the crumple zone on a car and because they would slow your fall in a similar way with crumpling rather than with drag which is what would happen in water you would want to spread your force out as much as possible rather than try to slip through so a belly flop would be the safest option. Murph is right that as they crumple they would harden, but that's not a bad thing, that means that the rate of deceleration would increase as you slow and you would gradually slow to a stop. The depth of the pool needs to be considered here as it does with the water because if it's too shallow there isn't enough sponge to slow you before stopping. Essentially, the croissants would act like a giant airbag like the ones Nitro Circus uses for practice if the pile was big enough and it would be more effective than water at slowing you down and keeping you alive. Murph should look up videos of people falling far distances onto cardboard boxes because that's a similar principle.

Murph, you gotta take the tiny L

This croissant question is way more complicated than I originally thought. To get an accurate answer you have to consider: - croissant displacement as a function of depth (at the top of the pool, croissants will fly all over the place but as you go deeper they will be more likely to stay in place) - croissant energy absorption through the entire smooshing process (it’s likely some exponential function) - croissant packing density - the fact that as you go deeper, the weight of the upper level of croissants pre-smooshes the lower levels, reducing their ability to absorb the jumper’s kinetic energy. Eventually, in an infinitely deep croissant pool, there would be a floor where the croissants are fully crushed by the weight of the croissants above them). I think the only way to solve this is with a full on sim. Idk what SW, if any, can handle this lol I’m not a mech Eng though so don’t spend too much time simulating physical systems. Maybe this SW is readily available.

🥐 Went down a rabbit hole, thought I’d share. I fear that everyone saying a 100 ft jump into anything will destroy you are wrong. [obligatory trained professionals, do not try this at home warning] The standard men’s high dive is 89 ft, the world record cliff dive is 192 ft. The world record cliff jump into snow is 255 ft, which, is kinda making it sound like those air pockets are important. Speaking of air, stuntmen can safely jump onto airbags from ~200 ft but the world record jump onto air bag is 342 ft. There’s a flight attendant that fell from 33,000 ft after the plane exploded and survived, but she was obviously Quite Injured. However, there’s also at least one guy who jumped from 125,000 ft, no parachute, successfully landing in a (special) net. And what’s a croissant but a special net? I tried looking up novelty record jumps into other random objects but had no luck and am taking the internet away from myself now. So tl;dr: I think *some people* could jump into croissants and be fine, but the average dummy/person in the “I moved my head slightly too fast and threw out my back” age bracket (👉me) should probably back away from the diving board. Anyway, I’m off to go touch some grass (carefully, with no sudden movements) ✌️❤️🥐

What if it was a giant tube also 100 ft long filled with croissants so that it would slow the rate of your descent like how skydivers get cushioned by branches? That’s the only way I can envision it working

Ok but we are glazing over the word "across" in the spell. It's for moving parallel to the water, not falling into it.

murph would like for you to drink a lake

The idea of someone jumping off a 10 story building (roughly 100 ft) is terrifying no matter what the pool is filled with

Murph, you’re so wrong it’s killing me. Is it the depth of the pool that is fucking with you?

I entered the croissant question to 'what if' from xkcd. I will let you know if the question ever gets answered.

I don’t agree with Murphy

As someone who's been playing online games for years, hard disagree on the digital dice not telling their stories.

we need a mixed bag cousin alignment chart

Some croissants would compress, but there also be croissant displacement. I agree with the people who equate it to a foam pit. The only real issue is the height. I don't know it anything could keep you safe from a 100ft fall. Except maybe an airplane seat, luck, and a jungle canopy.

People have survived skydiving accidents by landing on blackberry bushes..so? Probably wouldn't die from landing in croissants. Wouldn't be good. But Emily definitely got the sound effects right.

who can get them in touch with Dr. Angela Collier?

If the goal is purely to survive the initial hit, the answer is croissants. The air trapped in the dough layers makes them shock absorbers compared to the rigid, incompressible nature of water

You guys should have Goodreads profiles so we can follow what you’re reading both good and bad

Fiending for a campaign where we try to renovate our tavern, running it or playing in it honestly

You would for sure die as the croissants would collapse underneath you and grow harder and harder as you continue to fall. That being said, could you survive falling into a pool of wonderully fluffy focaccia?

A croissant pit is like a thicker more dense foam pit. Sounds more dangerous than a foam pit. 100 feet is so far, its scary. I think the gang needs to stand on a 100ft ledge or at least Google it

I'm Dyin' Murhpy!!! ITS DARK SOULS HALLOWEEN TOWN!

Well now I want a cWahsoinntttt

Murph, they're NOT toasted

No you wouldn’t die. Did we forget about David Blane jumping onto the cardboard boxs from 100ft up. Now if the croissants were only pool deep you would die but if there wasn’t a limit on how deep the croissants you wouldn’t die.

The juice question ending with "should I have stopped this?" Almost made me crash my lawnmower, I was laughing so hard

You would 100% die. When you first hit the layer of croissant it would collapse and take some of the fall but that layer would compress against the layers further down and make it as hard as rock.

Anyone else's first thought the Halloween town from the Disney Channel Original Movie?

The amount of people who think croissants are akin to foam makes me really concerned that NADDPOD fans have been eating decorative fake croissants made of foam for years. Don’t eat foam 😭

I love how there is no consensus on the croissant debate

A simple thought experiment of slapping a croissant vs slapping the surface of a pool tells you which one is more compressible/less painful/better at slowly dissipating an impact. The main concern regarding impact then would simply be that you'll need far more depth to dissipate the impact in croissants than you need with water. However, at one point, the idea of an infinite depth of croissants was permitted, so that scenario is fine. You'll almost certainly get buried and suffocate/"drown" but Emily didn't seem to mind that consequence 😆 I would even estimate for the napkin math that they have a much lower spring coefficient than, say, a bungee cord, so my worry of injury from impact itself is very low, given a suitable depth and posture upon landing. Edit: Including this great Reel Physics video that Nate Card linked earlier, as its discussion of the Assassin's Creed trust fall into a cart of hay is an excellent analogue to this discussion: https://youtu.be/yr6Wg8sQj0w?si=2RluDsEOsskULTHT

The croissants under the top layer would compact under the weight of the other croissants. So you’d be good until the the top layer of croissants compress under you and you basically impact solid crogound after that.

Skydiving into a pit full of croissants feels like something red bull would do

I see why they didn’t make Murph Batman at College Humor

Mechanical engineering professor here; sent an email with my results and assumptions.

Still thinking about this an hour later lol. But if this man can survive a jump from 25,000 feet into a net, you can survive one from 100 into croissants: https://youtu.be/GaANi96Z-Wg?si=RVlcpLmGjl43hVa6

i'm sorry murph but i am siding with emily. i do think an ocean filled with croissants is way more dangerous, but if its just a pool? yeah i'd trust the costco croissants to protect our stupid asses. i dont think it would have an air sound when its crushed tho, sorry emily </3 maybe a few flaky crunches at best.

I love how confidently wrong Murph is. Assuming the pool is adequately deep enough, the croissants will definitely act like a foam cushion and protect you.

Emily would absolutely die

I asked my physicist friend and here's his response "I would need to know more about the compression ratio but gut instinct says it's bad. Either it compresses slowly which means the initial impact will be pretty stiff and maybe kill you. Or it compresses quickly and the initial impact will be soft but then 30 feet won't bleed all the energy and you'll splat when it's fully compressed and you bottom at still at high speed. Argument could be made depending on weight of person and hence energy bleed required"

I would agree with other commenters who argue the croissants would be analogous to a foam pit. As someone who did gymnastics for most of my life, I have a great deal of experience with those, and as someone who was a dumb teen with constant access to a foam pit, I have a *specific* relevant experience to offer. When I was about 12 or 13, a friend dared me to dive into the foam pit as I would into water, and I agreed! Reader, the way I felt my whole spinal cord *compress* in a horrifying way was beyond description. Thanks to the grace of pure luck, my 13-year old joints, and the fact that I'd only done it from a very low height, I managed to walk away mostly uninjured (though my whole neck and back felt *awful* for a few weeks), but I can firmly attest that any "soft" material you might go to land in can still absolutely break you if you do it from too high or in the wrong position. At minimum you'd break both your legs.

Croissants are less dense than water, so it’s more like jumping into a foam pit, it just depends on how fast the croissants would compress if they are loosely stacked and not compressed to begin with

The pastry jump discussion had me thinking of this video from a dozen years ago: https://youtu.be/yr6Wg8sQj0w?si=2RluDsEOsskULTHT This is using hay which they assume compresses at a 6ft:1ft ratio. I’m guessing croissants do not compress that much. And even if they did you would need over 20 feet deep of them to walk away from the jump. This video also assumes a jump of over 150ft though. So you might need slightly less cushion. If you bought the croissants you’d want to use, try to press them into a flat solid and measure the ratio of puffed vs flat. And then you could use the formulas from the video.

The record for the highest jump into water is someone named Lasso Schaller who jumped from 196ft 10in. Which is wild! Also, Neil deGrasse Tyson crossover?

So i kinda think they should do a monthly show where they play as "the worst possible annoying players and DM" personas that they've been building. Just for like, a few months

I agree with Emily on a lot of things but the croissants ain’t it, girl. 😂

Mark Rober or Mythbusters. Are yall here? PLEASE explain croissant physics to us!

Is this another tiny L?

Batman murph voice in Halloween town would be an amazing campaign. “DEATH IS ON THE TABLE” so funny.

yall really think bread wouldnt greatly injure you vs water, which people often jump into from heights lmao

So, I know how we feel about AI as a whole but the croissant thing truly had me curious, so according to ChatGPT you’d PROBABLY die jumping into the croissants. You may live depending how deep the pool is and how you landed, but you’d definitely not be walking away. They’d compress too rapidly and you’d slam into hard croissants very quickly

I think Emily is totally right with the croissants!

You absolutely would be better off jumping into a pool of croissants, so long as the pool was deep enough. It's all about deceleration. If you jump from high enough, water tension makes the surface of the water act essentially like concrete. Croissants would essentially act like a foam pit- as you squish the croissants together, they'll compress and slow the fall. There'd be a less rapid deceleration. People have survived skydiving accidents because they landed in a bush as opposed to plain ground. They were hurt as fuck, but survived. In the same way, you'd probably be hurt really badly but you'd be more likely to survive a high fall into croissants rather than water. Murph is 100% wrong, and Emily is, as always, perfectly right :)

There's a whole spectrum between Will Definitely Kill You and Walk It Off Without Even An Ache The Next Morning. My entirely unscientific gut call is that it won't kill you, but it will hurt enough that you regret not listening to Murph.

Not to be 🤓 about it, but it's all about slowing down as gradually as possible, and a pool full of croissants does a WAY better job of that than water... It might not be the ideal rate of deceleration, but I wager it's close, and I would literally bet my life it's closer to the optimum than water from a high starting velocity. Edit - I thought of this later, but think about a foam pit... What is a croissant but a block of foam made from gluten+air instead of plastic/rubber+air?

I don’t swim, can’t swim. But you bet your ass if there is a pool of croissants, I’m Scrooge McDucking into that pillowy pool of safety to the bosom of god.

I disagree that players should be allowed to derail any campaign just because you put a shop they can own in it as set dressing. There's a whole genre of management sim video games that scratch that itch far more satisfyingly, please stop forcing DMs to learn business classes, it's so boring to run in practice.

…Caldwell said 6-7

i stand with emily on the croissant debate 🙂‍↕️

I hate to say it but Murph needs to take the L and jump in the croissant pool

I make croissants for a living, and everyone is wrong, but Emily is least wrong. WATER is bad to land on. Croissants are more equivalent to foam blocks. The 100 feet would be the killer either way.

I think that the breaking force of the croissants is slow enough to stop your fall, but you would die from the unequal distribution of that force on your body since you’re falling into an uneven surface. Basically your bones would snap and you’d break your spine.

Take the L Murph 😂

I did (some of) the math! You’d be going 54 mph hitting those croissants after a 100 ft fall. So the force would be the same as being hit by a bus going 54 mph. Imagine this bus is coming down a narrow alley at you. Now imagine filling up the alley with the lightest fluffiest croissants ten feet high and 20-30 feet deep. Would you survive the hit cushioned by all those croissants? Maybe Another fun variation: you are in the bus standing in the aisle. No seatbelt or airbag. But the entire bus is filled to the ceiling with croissants. They are all around you. Then the bus crashes into a brick wall at 54 mph? Survivable? Maybe. I was in Murphy side but now I’m not so sure

why am i paying for this and why am i going to keep doing it

I'm pretty sure Emily is right about croissants. Murph is correct, it boils down to a material's ability to gradually slow you down rather than stopping you abruptly. In other words, it's about how squishy a material is. I think, croissants are squishy enough that an ocean of croissants would save your life. However, you'd need to land flat to hit a larger surface and benefit from more croissants being squished. Here's a video of a guy falling ~30 ft and landing on empty boxes: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/lfX3P3MwKN8 Boxes are clearly better suited for that -- more air inside means more squishiness. And it's 30 ft, not 100 ft. So I think a 100 ft fall into an ocean of croissants would be dangerous, but there's a chance to survive that.

Hi! I bought tickets for the radio city hall show however I just found out I have an exam on the day of the show and I live in Canada so I won’t be able to make it. I bought ticket insurance just in case so I would be able to return the ticket. However it says resale is unavailable for the tickets (Row V seat 609, 610). I spoke with ticket master support and they said I could transfer the tickets to another person. Any advice on what to do?

If you are looking to sentence to a large hat. You should have chosen the Razz-berry berret, come on it was right there!

I need to see Shoocharu animate Murph’s edgelord DM bit

That's not how HP works murph

#TeamCroissantSurvival.

Literally fell asleep listening to them talking about croissants and woke up to them still talking about croissants.

I love to listen to my favorite professional rage baiters and my favorite professional rage rat

Murph probably thinks they are toasted.

I feel like croissants are kind of the texture of foam, so landing in croissants is like landing in a foam pit like they do in BMX so you'd be totally fine

Don't know if this has been said yet but airbags can definitely injure you, it is not a good argument for diving into croissants lol

I fully believe the croissants would be fine. Especially if there's a sufficiently large pool of them, they're dissipating your energy both by compressing and by physically moving out of the way, like a fluid.

You could survive jumping into croissants from 100ft Murph is trippin

HANG ON: Even if you have infinite croissants, the weight of the croissants at the top will cause the croissants below to become more and more compressed the deeper you get, until at a certain depth the croissants will basically be bricks. So the golden question is: is that ultimate squished croissant depth deep enough to allow you time to decelerate slowly enough to survive? I’m not proud of how much this has consumed my brain for the past 15 minutes.

This is the best physics based argument they’ve ever had on the pod, Murph must take a gargantuan L

FYI, the water spray in high-diving doesn’t make the landing softer, it’s just so the diver can clearly see the surface of the water better than if it was glossy, smooth and reflective 😁

My gut reaction was to agree with Murph - I feel like the croissants would compress and run out of “give” too quickly to provide a gentle enough deceleration. But the more I think about it, I think that assumption applies far more when you have a finite container, like a small pool, which prevents the croissants around the edge to move down and outwards. BUT if you were diving into an infinitely deep ocean of croissants…maybe you’d actually be fine?? Because every croissant that becomes fully compressed will then just transfer the force to the next one down, and so on. We need a YouTube psychics nerd to do a deep dive (ha) on this

Hearing how confident Murph was about the danger of jumping into a pit of croissants just makes me believe Murph has never had a good croissant.

When stunt people make long falls, they land use cardboard boxes, not water. Croissants are more like boxes than water. Therefore, croissants are safer than water. I'm not smart enough to do the math, but I'm certain that if you can survive a 100 ft fall into water, you can survive a 100 ft fall into croissants more safely. The greatest danger is not stopping in time and hitting the bottom of the container. I do not believe you would be killed by the croissants because they have less surface tension allowing them to be moved more easily by your impact, whereas impacting the surface of water is the dangerous part.

All I know is that now I want a fluffy soft Costco croissant (not toasted)

As an engineer with an agricultural specialization, I believe I am uniquely qualified to answer this croissant question. Justice Axford has the right of it, it would be comfy and good. Thank you

Mmmm .k

I would watch taskmaster with the 2 crew and zac with Brennan as the taskmaster and Sam reich as the assistent taskmaster

I really love that Murph couldn't move on

Made the mistake of working out during the Dark Souls Halloween bit. Murph was killing me mid-set Also, I'm thinking the pool can't be any less than 50 feet deep or you're rocketing through those croissants and splatting on the bottom.

Hey gang, I'm searching for the elven word they joked about tattooing/having as a funny tattoo. Does anybody know what word it was? xoxo

Wet Jake 2028

“Grab them and force them into the juicer” - Murph…. Sounds a lot like “You ARE meat” - Maxwell Gotch ( played by Murph) …. Starting to see a trend here 😅😂

Taskmaster is a channel 4 show not BBC and how would you score jump into a pool of croissants? Caldwell I fear you've let yourself down there old boy.

I personally don’t like the “make death real” kind of DMing. I am running a serious dark fantasy campaign right now. I usually am a super easy going dm when I see someone is near death I attack another party member or come up with a reason to give advantage and such. But for this one I said it’s a dark fantasy resurrection is not common place and I won’t pull punches. So I still do the other stuff but for example last session a PC came very near to death bc they are a queen and an assassin came after them. The assassin spent every turn focused on them because that’s what they came to do not attack anyone else. That is fine to me but just killing pcs to make fake stakes is cheap. If you want to go hard on one PC in a fight that’s fine but make it a plot hook. An assassin after them, an old rival who caught up to them etc.

Physics teacher: with a deep enough pool, the croissants would slow your descent and reduce the force. But, having not done the maths, I'd spitball that you'd need a pool of croissants that's 30 feet deep to survive a 100 foot drop

I'm not a mathematician or anything smart. I'm a guy who has a garage, a kiddie pool, and way too much free time. I tested the crossiants, and let me tell you jumping 10 feet into a kiddie pool of them, both freshly baked and the doughy ones, both hurt like a bitch still. There was almost no change to the pain my ankles felt. No one was seriously harmed in the test

My only question is would it be easier or harder for Caldwell to learn to run across a pool of croissants like those lizards?

I mean if you really want someone to dive into the science of the croissant problem Brennan could maybe get you the Hank Green hookup

Was anyone else reminded of the blender god/demon from A Crown of Candy (or was it the Ravening War?) with all of this blender talk?

This episode is so unhinged. Hook it into my veins

If the croissant pool is unlimited depth, hitting it would be better than unlimited water but youd need some way to get out A pool full of croissants probably wouldnt be deep enough to be safe A minutes-long crunch experienced by the full body… imagine…

Someone bake Murph a croissant in the shape of a tiny L

I’m not a physicist but I’ve watched every episode of Mythbusters. You would be dead. 100 feet is jumping off a 10 story building. The average pool is probably 10-15 feet deep. I think you would need a 30-50 foot deep pool of croissants to give you a chance. Yes, water is more dense but it also slows you down enough to not slam into the bottom of the pool. The croissants are not dense enough and not to even mention if you landed in the shallow side of the pool. Hate’s me to say it, but W for Murph.

can’t wait for them to address the absolute whomp that murph is taking in the comments rn

This is my boyfriend’s take, he ♥️ physics TLDR; you’d survive, it’d be at most as bad as a survivable car crash And Emily? He thinks it would be safer than water (if you jumped feet first into the croissant pool instead of diving head first) Okay so check it: So velocity due to gravity without air resistance v = √(2gh) v = √(2*32.2*100) v ‎ =  feet/s ‎ =  ~55mph when you hit the croissants A diving pool has a minimum depth of 16.4 feet So assuming 90% compression for croissants, Let’s say you decelerate uniformly over 15 feet, Which is about 216.9 ft/s² Divide that by gravity 32.2 ft/s² You get a g force of ~6.7 Gs Which is easily survivable. Now your max g force is likely higher, I just assumed uniform deceleration because I didn’t feel like doing the calculus atm, But even so, you’re not likely to encounter a g force that will kill you unless you’re landing straight on your neck.

Unhinged behavior with Dark Souls Halloween Town and Croissant survival discussions.

Jumping in croissants is safe because i can eat them on the way back up

Grim dark animal crossing is just The Strongest Florist 😁

If you want to be super pedantic you would absolutely be more safe hitting water than croissants. Especially if the water has a bubble stream like divers have to break the surface tension. But also I DO believe that Jake is right with the LOOSELY packed croissants. It would act like a foam pit I believe. I think you MAYBE could survive but you’ll probably be crippled. Its isn’t even a tiny L it’s a MASSIVE L for the pro-croissant side.

Super excited to find that, when I went to pose this question on r/theydidthemath, it was already there, with a NADDPOD shoutout! https://www.reddit.com/r/theydidthemath/s/Y9qIQG6hBr

I don't understand how Murph doesn't get it. They wouldn't be toasted, so you wouldn't shatter anything

Another classic for the annals of NADDPod history. Croissanting will never be the same again. And neither will the Olympics.

murph being so loud and so wrong about the croissants is killing me. gonna go down as an all time giant L

How high can you stack croissants before they crush the bottom croissant and become incomprehensible? Humans typically go 21 feet deep in water at a 60 foot dive. If the croissants where stacked 10ft high and the bottom became incompressable...

man we haven't gotten a good old fashioned Murph Gaslighting like this in a while

Good news, Emily! I've crunched the numbers and you would experience *no impact at all* jumping 100ft into a pool of croissants as long as it was filled at least 47 feet (or approximately 410 croissants) deep with the croissants I got from Walmart today, assuming you weigh 50kg and flop off the diving board like a dead fish rather than spring boarding off it. Oh, and assuming the croissants are all glued together in one giant mass so they can't just slide out of the way as you fall through them. I am an engineer and would be happy to show my work if requested. Hell, if I can figure out how, I may show my work if *not* requested.

I feel like the biggest croissant issue would be not sliding right through them. Foam has a lot of friction but a not fresh, untoasted croissant isn't going to hold together well. You would need to belly flop for sure

Sentence the Tavern DM to read Toriko. The gourmet hunter’s could be a huge inspiration for campaign material!

100% team croissant here 🥐

Did they ever sentence that last person or did they just talk about the croissant high five for ten minutes 💀

Murph, they aren’t toasted

I really happy to belong to this community.

Murph has never heard of a foam pit.

Murph sounds like Pete Holmes’s Batman and I can’t unsee it every time he does the voice

Moonlighter and its sequel are exactly a dungeon crawl to finance your shop game

As a bartender I can confidently assert you would survive a 100ft fall into a croissants completely unscathed

We need MythBusters to come back for the Croissant Dive

NADDPOD x Taskmaster would heal the world.

Murph has only encountered very stale croissants.

Croissant over water. Falling in croissants is more akin to stunt people falling into cardboard boxes. The surface tension of water at that height would make it like hitting cement.

Instant death from falling 100 feet into a pool of croissants seems like an overstatement. For sure you *could* die but that many loosely packed grocery store croissants are going to absorb a lot of energy. Most likely you'd be alive but fucked up pretty bad.

Such a shame that Ryan Urphy doesn’t believe in the power of croissants

Egg drop test: https://www.reddit.com/r/NotAnotherDnDPodcast/s/Zzo6vk5BrA

Air bags and foam pits can and do injure people. Maybe not fatally on average, but still not great. So I'm on team Murph for this croissant debate.

About the croissants, I’m with Murph. The main inaccuracy being assumed by the others is that the croissants would retain their shape to some degree when pressure is applied, that’s what makes things bouncy. The outer crust of a croissant is delicate and would crush and collapse as soon as your body applied pressure to it. The rest of a croissant is air. You’re hitting the bottom of that pool SO fast no matter how deep it is

So... I may have posted the croissant question on reddit /AskScience and /AskPhysics... so far results are in Emily's favor

Murph says "You're going to die" as Emily gleefully jumps off a 100' cliff into a large pool filled with croissants. Suddenly, from a nearby tree, an even bigger pool filled with croissants swoops in and catches her safely.

I'm so sure that airbags hurt. If your body wants to be a projectile and you are hit with an airbag you're still getting broken ribs

So when is the Dark Souls Halloweentown One shot?

Murph has clearly never jumped in a foam pit

Murph is so wrong about the croissants

Unfortunately I don’t think Murph has ever been more wrong

I think this is like stunt guys jumping into cardboard boxes. For reference here's a video of a car jumping 100' into cardboard boxes and coming out basically fine. Cardboard boxes are just big croissants for cars so it holds up https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=unp8LS4TY70

For the dnd beyond case when looking at the sheet on there I've accidentally hit to roll dice when I didnt mean to and that mightve been what happened with the cousin

Infinity damage is a Ryan Urphy mechanic

Hey you guys described the gameplay of Moonlighter

They've got to send this to Randall Munroe for What If. Physicist AND artist.

Fun fact: D&D Beyond actually uses a physics engine for their dice rolls! It’s as close as it gets to real dice in a digital space!

Honestly I’m heartbroken, I’ve never sided with Emily over Murph but here we are. All it took was croissants. Really disappointed man really disappointed. I thought you were the best, most reasonable, logical of us all. The bastion holding back Caldwell’s nonsense and Emily’s schemes. Yet here we stand. Broken hearted. Bc I came to sh

I’m for sure on team croissant. It’d be just like jumping into a foam pit, no?

Great selection of cases

Love to see Batman Brian

First it was bear hell, now it’s croissant pool. 2026 is off too a great start <3

i love dark souls halloweentown sm. i knew i watched 15 hours of souls lore for a reason 🙏🏽

“maybe if their horse was helping with surgery” most caldwell phrase ever. brother what.

emily is so right about the croissant dive, the real struggle would be trying to get out

You’d definitely live jumping into croissants. 100 feet won’t get you to terminal velocity. People jump into piles of cardboard and live

100% you are better off jumping into croissants than water! Croissants don’t have surface tension (a large barrier to overcome when jumping into water which is why they have to break it when jumping from high heights) AND croissants, unlike water, are compressible. As long as you aren’t pencil diving into 15 feet of croissants you are fine Here’s the proof: https://www.reddit.com/r/NotAnotherDnDPodcast/s/Zzo6vk5BrA

Truly wasn’t prepared for the croissant debate… and honestly, that’s on me fam. I should have expected it

Where do we get “Team Croissant” shirts for the live shows?

I have a PhD in physics and live in Paris. I’m thinking that we can just check the ideal scenario of landing on croissants and see if that is possible. In line with the argument that croissant are balloon-like (when you land on them and squish them, they absorb an amount of energy and slow your fall) the question is how many croissants you would need to break your fall. As calculated for ballons (See https://physics.stackexchange.com/questions/450917/surviving-a-fall-into-a-balloon-filled-pit ) we imagine a pyramid of stacked ballons that absorb your impact. For terminal velocity (it would be smaller for 100 feet) you need only about 4600 balloons. Say that the force required to pop a ballon is the same as if you squish 30 croissants at the same time. Then we need about 138 000 croissants! If we have large croissants, each of volume 0.15*0.05*0.05 m^3, we get a total volume of almost 52 m^3. But an Olympic pool contains 2500 m^3 (although in a different geometry), so only a tiny amount of that filled with croissants is enough. The intuition that a pool filled with ideal soft squishy croissant would break you fall is therefore not totally crazy! However, as others have pointed out with that amount of croissants there is also no way that they wouldn’t act more like a granular solid or a liquid. Our pyramid of squished croissants would weight 9700 kg, they are in fact quite dense! I’m saying: tiny w for Murph here.

Team croissant here. I think it'd be more similar to those pools of foam cube than we think. I think we can survive the fall so long as it's like incredibly deep but drown in the croissants

I want to be a razzing rights lawyer when I grow up

When they said “sentence to play in this gritty juice campaign” I was really waiting for someone to chime in with something about pulp.

To quote Caldwell in some episode either 8BBC or later, “Emily you know I usually go with you on your bullshit but I simply can’t!” I’m not a sciematist, but I did stay in a holiday inn last night (I took some science classes). LETS START WITH BASE STATS Height: 100 ft (30.48m for real science numbahs) Mass: 125 lb (56-57 kg, I figured this is how much Bailiff Jake weighs) Gravity: approx 9.81 m/s^2 (Patreon doesn’t let me format this all fun and sciency so don’t attack me, real scientists!) NOW LETS TALK ABOUT IMPACT SPEED Again, I’m limited by formatting here but just imagine what the calculations look like (LABORATORY OF THE MIND). You have to calculate joules of energy by referencing speed based off gravity and height (among other things). NUMBERS. What that comes out to is roughly 16,900 (nice) joules of energy which has to be spread out SOMEWHERE. (a person/object has X amount of joules of energy based on their mass and height relative to when they land on their fall. Regardless of what they’re hitting. This is a grossly summarized way of saying this.) So 16,900 (nice) joules of energy is like a small car accident (without any sort of protection/safety features, turns out your body doesn’t have airbags! Don’t you dare make a boob joke to this), and in order to disperse that energy it has to push against something. Croissants will shoot *outward*, not directly absorb the contact, which effectively means you’ll end up instantaneously squishing the few you land on directly, while pushing away others, and then the air pockets will immediately be crushed removing any dense/soft cushion. The reason why a foam pit helps falling is due to the material being engineered to absorb impact in a way that redistributes those joules of energy, though even a foam pit from 100 ft would require a very deep pit. What you’re wanting to prepare for is SLOW DECELERATION which croissants simply will not be able to accomplish. In short, CROISSANT PIT VERY BAD, IT NO HELP, YOU DIE.

How many households are debating the fluid dynamics of the croissant today?

Justice for Murph on the croissant debate! Absolute insanity lmao Love the Taskmaster shoutout but I gotta pick up Caldwell on a small thing: it's a Channel 4 show, not BBC. Very common mistake though! All the seasons are uploaded on their official youtube channel so anyone who hasn't seen it should go and do that. It's a thing of pure fun, silly delight just like naddpod.

Does Murph realise the croissant aren't toasted?

Murph is so wrong about the croissants it’s crazy

"gods must have some microbes...like giardia.." *chefs kiss*

I'm usually with Murph, but I think you can survive falling into an infinit amount of croissants. Whenever a croissant becomes crushed and dense, another croissant will absorb the impact.

Jane Douglas of OxVenture has a physics degree I think, you probably DO have physicists emailing you but I like her energy

Doesnt emily have a "gluten" allergy? Arguement over

It’s possible to injure yourself in any fall, if someone is trained they could do a croissant dive. Are they supposed to fall into a normal pool? Presumably they would be on a high dive, and when people do dives that high it’s normally either into the ocean or a specially-designed pool for that event, you could absolutely build a pool to contain enough croissants to slow a fall. The comparison to foam blocks isn’t perfect because that foam has a higher compressive strength than the limited gluten in croissants, but that might actually work to the diver’s benefit at that height.

Science boy here, I’m not gonna do any math over this but after looking around a little it seems like the reason people can survive jumping into a swimming pool of water 10ish feet deep is because they do like a pencil dive and then flatten out allowing the water to absorb the impact in a very distributed way which doesn’t always kill you. Now if we’re talking about a pool of Costco croissants and you go in legs first you’re gonna break your legs immediately, so we have to change gears. Naturally you’d want to flatten out for that satisfying croissant recliner moment. While that would create more surface area to distribute all the energy of the fall you have to leave your spine and brain stem exposed, and even though croissants are soft they are actually just butter and air and when you squish them they quickly densify into essentially a brick of butter which I do believe after falling 100 feet would likely break your back oppa Bane style. That being said there would surely be an incredibly satisfying moment in there and I would simply recommend getting that sweet croissantisfaction by jumping from a slightly lower height. P.S. Sorry for siding with Murph, if anybody does the math or wants to make a mythbusters style crash test dummy with me let me know

Sinner The Rouge vs Ryan Eurphy when

Beautiful Illustrious Effervescent Justice Hurwitz (Boston) please more Skaldova. The people yearn

Hear me out. The croissants would smoosh together absorbing the impact. It definitely depends how deep But I think it would slap really hard and you’d break a few bones but it would works However. The buttery dust would probably suffocate you

I listened to this twice because I thought it was so funny. Near the end of the 2nd listen I realized I had been imagining bagels as if they were croissants for about 2 hrs…

🥚 EGG DROP TEST INTO CROISSANTS 🥐!!! It’s the only way to know!

From 100 ft, a person hits any surface at about 24–25 m/s (about 55 mph). That’s already a dangerous impact speed. Survival depends less on what you land on and more on how long the deceleration takes. If you stop suddenly—even on something “soft”—your body experiences massive internal forces. Croissants are fluffy… but not protective. Fresh croissants are mostly air, but that air escapes instantly under impact. Once compressed, 20 ft of croissants effectively becomes a heavy, semi-solid pile. The stopping distance might only be a few feet (or less), which means extreme deceleration. A 100-ft fall into 20 ft of croissants (above average pool depth) would almost certainly be fatal or life-threatening. Fluffiness helps a little, but nowhere near enough to safely absorb that much energy.

I brought up the croissant debate to my family, including my sister studying biochemical mechanical engineering. The results are: If you fall into a regular size pool full of croissant you would likely severely hurt your body and possibly die. They will cause some resistance slightly slowing your fall but the quantity (and density) of croissants protecting you from the bottom of the pool is so small that the resistance they provide would be dismissable. They wouldn't be a great cussion as they aren't a cohesive unit. You would slip through most of them, and the one you do fall on are not dense enough to cussion your fall, they will just be crushed by your weight. (Imagine slaming a croissant on a table with your fist, that croissant does not stop you from hurting your fist). One giant croissant would be more useful in absorbing and distributing the force of you falling. However, if you had an infinitely deep pool of croissants you would likely survive the fall. The croissants would still be crushed under your weight but with only more croissant under you, the resistance they provide would eventually slow you to a stop. Unfortunately you would probably suffocate to death as the croissants you slipped through would cover you as you fall. The real question is how deep of a croissant pool would you need to slow your speed enough to stop you before hitting bottom of the pool.

Unfortunately the only thing funnier than your player saying “a bigger book comes and eats it?” Is having a big book with teeth come and eat it as an answer

Caldwell really said “you’re not a push-over you’re a doormat”

There’s a video game from 2018 called “Moonlighter” where you own a magic item shop and moonlight as a dungeon crawler to stock your shop and that style can suit TTRPG very easily Also it would be a very cartoonish death if you high dive into croissants cause you would leave an imprint of your corpse on impact

"Dungeon crawling to upgrade the tavern" really made me want to play Dark Cloud for the PS2

No way you’re not DESTROYED by those croissants

I love Murph’s Darksouls Halloween Town setting. It’s so gritty; getting giardia from drinking a God is just one of the things that shows how grim and realistic it is.

Dark Souls Halloweentown DM Murph is amazing

Caldwell is in fact exactly wrong that physical dice are more random than digital, because the quality control to actually make sure dice are perfectly fair is cost amd labour-intensive, only casinos bother with it, it's not actually superstition that your dice roll differently

If someone threw a croissant at me as hard as humanly possible, it WOULD hurt, the same is true of balls in a ball pit, I think if you fell 100 feet, you would Impact the croissants and they would CRUSH INTO you, it would be kill you and be more horrifying than crashing into ground, you could be GORED by the pointy part of the croissant like it was the horn of a rampaging bull.

I am with Murph, the croissants would become paste under the force of your fall

The players have definitely seen Delicious in Dungeon and the DM hasn't

This is what Google AI says lol. Sorry it supports you murph Jumping 100 feet into a pool full of croissants would likely result in serious injury or death. While croissants are soft individually, at high impact speeds the human body would encounter a sudden deceleration upon hitting the dense collection of pastries, similar to hitting solid ground. The high velocity generated by a 100-foot fall means the force of impact would be substantial enough to cause severe blunt force trauma and potentially multiple fractures or internal injuries. The air pockets in the pastries would compress instantly, offering negligible cushioning against the immense kinetic energy of a falling person.

If someone can get me a pool full of croissants, I'll try this with my enemies!

The Sydney Opera House is 220 feet tall…….

I think you'd probably die from the croissant pit because croissants still have their own gravity, so there would be a point where they start crushing the lower croissants to a density you couldn't fall through. This would make the depth of the pool irrelevant after a certain point. I haven't done the math but I don't think you'd be able to decelerate to a survival velocity before reaching the denser zone of croissants.

I get a sense that murph and Emily recently rented The Watchmen from the library recently with the Rorschach reference

I mean all of those croissants are just making a foam pit.

The DM that accidentally did the same trope twice needs to keep doing that Trope. Its not gonna be funny the next im or the time after but by time it happens like 7 or 8 times in a row its gonna come back around to being funny.

I’m so sorry but the surface tension of water molecules make it act as a solid when enough force+surface area is applied (why a belly flop hurts more than a dive) now compare to those foam blocks gymnasts jump into…. A croissant has more ability to adjust to force as it is a soft solid whereas water ACTS as a full solid when impact is applied. In this essay I will….💀

Forget about the Croissants. Did anyone else notice that the voice Murphy used for Darksouls Halloween-Town DM sounded like Trump doing a batman impression?

I have to agree with Justice Murphy. Pool full of croissants sounds like fun but is not an effective means of stopping yourself from a fall.

The biggest issue in the croissant drop is how much force per croissant gets absorbed before they structurally break, and how easily it transfers between crossiants. If the time of collision is long enough, you could feasibly survive the croissant drop at 100ft.

0% chance you survive the croissant jump. Hon. B. Murphy has it absolutely right. Look up the airbags they use for jumping off buildings in movies - how quickly people sink into them. Croissants could simply not displace fast enough to accept a body w/ out crumpling it. Looking forward to the documentary.

You would die if you jumped into a pool of croissants from 100 ft. Or at least get very hurt. The croissants would offer almost no cushion.

I feel like if you spread your body out, the croissants would absorb enough energy to save you, IF it was like a pile of them like 50ft high. I also think you'd get seriously injured and then just die trying to climb out. You'd for sure get trapped under literal tons of bread

I'm getting way too into this and need to go be productive in my life but the highest high dive jump (that 193 ft they reference) was into a 26 ft pool of water. He was BADLY INJURED. A standard Olympic diving pool isn't even deeper than 17 feet. Murph is right. Everyone have a great day!

As far as the croissants go- I have about 1200 skydives. I wouldn’t want to fall vertically into them, but a guy in a wingsuit did land directly into a huge pile of cardboard boxes. I wish he had used croissants now.

I asked my father who is a physics professor, and he said the impact would probably kill you. He also said “that sounds like a waste of croissants. And also a waste of a human life.”

I haven't listened to the episode yet, but Emily is right.

I believe emily is correct im a mechanical engineer and I will attempt to get you some numbers soon. I believe the croissants could be modeld as an elastic net

The way they all bold face gaslight Murph with unspoken coordination is genuinely disturbing 🤣

Croissant pit discussion gave me surprise round withdrawals

I suspect you would push through a whole bunch of croissants on your way down, but they would act like crumple zones and spread the impact force out over a longer period. However, based on the staleness of my local supermarket croissants , you'd be pulverizing them as you go down, at which point you drown in a quicksand of buttery pastry dust.

Murph’s bad DM voice slowly started becoming Trump at one point

I was almost pissed. Back to business as usual. I dont pay for no ads. I pay for extra content and the last 3 weeks felt like theft.

Pete Holmes' Batman, Badman - is that you?? #deathonthetable

To the DM with the monsters being eaten by other monsters: you gotta reverse the goof. Have a huge monster that is comically eaten by a tiny monster that then attacks the party. Then proudly state that your players would never have seen it coming. They may try to razz you for repeating the same goof a third time with a tiny twist but you can reverse the razz by insisting it was different.

If the croissant ocean is deep enough, there would be enough there to not fully kill you but you'd probably get hurt. If it's like, a small layer of croissants, you gon die. The key here is the depth of croissant landing location.

They’re not toasted, man

The people who wanted to run a tavern instead of dungeon crawl make me think of a video game called moonlighter. It’s a roguelike where you run through the dungeon fighting monsters at night, and at day time you run a shop where you sell monster parts. Rly cute game, good pixel art.

March 2026, we fill Sydney harbour with croissants and jump off the bridge. The ultimate test.

It hurts just to slap a big piece of uncooked dough. 100 feet would definitely kill

A Croissant pit is just nature's foam pit. Murph is wrong. Embrace the soft caress of the croissants

Yeah, this is the same concept as a foam pit. Each croissant in the croissant column only has to compress a little bit to displace your kinetic energy and slow down your deceleration. The only question would be how deep would the pool have to be?

…my time has come. Hold for math.

I'm with Emily on the croissant issue. It would be like a foam pit.

The biggest issue i think with the croissant is croissant shape leaves too much space between croissant that unless you put them in organized way it might hurt

I love when Murph

Came here for the croissant physics 😆

Team Emily for the croissants. You might need a pool that is deeper than your average community pool, but after like 20ft of croissants you’d be fine

Would 100' get a human body to terminal velocity?

I want an episode that is just Murph playing the various different bad DM characters he’s created. Robo DM Murph vs. dark souls halloweentown Murph vs Ryan Urphy vs regular Murph. Please write an audio skit that’s setup like a one shot please 🧎‍♂️

I'm team croissant. I do think enough loose and fluffy croissants could save someone from death if jumped from a high distance. However, 100 ft is probably too much, and you would probably suffer pretty severe injuries, haha

Emily is right on this one

i’m no croissant scientist but i feel like murph is right here

i need to know if any of the great croissant debate was cut. how long was it originally. poor murph

Emily correct about the croissants. They need to execute murph.

"What do you call a group of cousins?" "Cousins." had me dying laughing.

CRYING at the Halloween Town campaign.

Mechanical Engineer here - gut reaction siding against Murph on the croissant debate. Will be doing some more research though on the compressibility of packed croissants

I myself am a scientist and i can confirm jumping a hundred feet into a pool of croissants you would feel a mild pain in your feet like jumping down the last two stairs as a child

I’m emailing a physicist rn wrt the croissant query

Another Joanne reference! Drawfee has never let go of that egg eating lizard

Team Murph in the Crossoint Dive Debate

I genuinely think you'd make like a 30 foot hole in the croissants and be unharmed

Generally I liked the advice they gave to the T-Rex dm but Caldwell's bit just felt like putting a hat on a hat... Also, re: the croissant collision question, the issue here is how much impact the croissants can absorb. This would be dependent on the consistency of the croissants and how deep the pit is. In this situation the croissant pit would function a lot like the front end of a car. Those are designed to crumple like an accordian to absorb the impact of the crash. If the croissant pit is deep enough and the croissants fluffy yet firm enough to absorb enough of the impact, the kinetic energy from the crash could disperse enough that you won't take any damage.

Murph: I have the best grimdark...no one does grimdark like me

How long does this croissant debate go on

*spooiiileerrss My fav moment of this episode is when Emily thinks it would feel great to pencil dive into a lake of croissants and Murph IMMEDIATELY goes “it FUR SURE wouldn’t” 😂 had me in absolute tears.

Someone has survived jumping out of a helicopter onto a giant stack of cardboard boxes while only wearing a wingsuit. Im so sure croissants would save you from 100 foot drop

I’m gonna need Mythbusters to come back for this croissant debate

From Miles WM I disagree with Murphs take that "death's on the table" is never going to work out. You can do it, but it's easy to mess up and get lost in a "grimdark" narrative. It's likely better to say there's no softening of consequences for players doing dumb sh!t. Wanting to kill characters is messed up, and those DM's do exist, but I think that showing up is a selection bias due to them being horrendous. Some GM's see --Can die-- and interpret that as --Should die--. Most of the good very deadly games I've played/GM'd have been very goofy. What they tend to miss is that the players can always quickly hop in with a new character, even if it doesn't make a great deal of narrative sense. TLDR: Grimdark only really works with characters who are like to survive, as that establishes consequences aside from death.

Okay but fr, croissants can be compressed while water cannot, so scientifically croissants are better to fall into than water!

Can't wait for the Darksouls Halloween Town full-length campaign.

Ain't no way you living that jump into croissants

Murph is 100% correct

Emily is 100 percent correct about sweet fluffy croissants.

NADDPod on Taskmaster when??? God, y’all would be so fantastic

This is a masterpiece

Petition for Kanglin’ Danglin’ Murph at the next live show

This is one of the funniest bits ever!

Croissant Gate

honestly an indie game about dungeon crawling in order to upgrade your tavern would be lit to shit and i'd play the hell out of that

Murph was successfully rage baited lmfao

There’s no way a pool of croissants wouldn’t be at least as safe as a pool of water right? I think Murph took a tiny L here

Looove a murph ragebaiting ep

I have to agree with Emily, I think a pool of croissant would be great to land in. They're so spongy, it'd be like landing on an airbag. (EDIT: I wrote this before the airbags were brought up.) It would be the perfect slow deceleration. Not so fast as to cause damage, but fast enough that you're not dozens of meters down in the croissant-pit. Just a gentle bready blanket catching you.

Murphs GM voice absolutely destroyed me this ep. Vaguely sounded like Muscle Man from regular show but really devolved and I loved it

really excited for the dark souls halloweentown mixed bag campaign

Death on the table murph is how i imagine pre-moonshine pendergreens would run a game

Death-on-the-table Murph should be the DM next. Extremely hostile short campaign is what the doctor ordered.

I love Murphs shitty GM characters

*sees title* Oh, this gon be good 😂

Basketball of cork = a people

A one-winged black dragon….so Toothless from How to Train Your Dragon?

LET JAKE TOUT!

:3

The Two Crew is eating good this weekend! 🙂‍↕️

DUN DUN