August 6, 2023

Soon™

I was trying to get it ready for today, but it's 1700 and I still have lots to do. 😭


What the fuck is going on?

On Discord yesterday, I wrote that I feel like I've kind of "levelled up" somehow in the writing of this episode.  I've just got this incredible energy to dive into the things I've glossed over in the past, really think about them in detail, and pull out the things that make them sexy.

Example (mild spoilers): yesterday I was punching up a scene where the heroine is getting ready for her shift, the part where she changes into a thong and heels before going out into the club. Normally I just describe that happening and let the avatar do the lifting, it's sexy because girls in thongs are sexy, right?

But somehow I just kind of knew there was an emotional beat missing from this scene. It's not just about changing clothes, it's about the effect of changing clothes. We have this intelligence officer, stripping out of her normal underwear, slipping on this girly little scrap of lace and elastic, designed to decorate her for the male gaze.

And I knew this would have an effect on her. A psychological transformation accompanies the physical one, as she changes from 'badass intelligence officer' to something more submissive, sexualised and demure.

And all this is happening in like a second, so it can't be this long internal monologue where she processes this and understands where it's coming from.  It's just this instinctive little rush of confliction that she has to grapple with when she sees her reflection.


Is it worth it?

I don't know! 😭 It's so hot to me that I feel like I can't not do it. But I don't know if you guys are even going to notice all the hours and effort that are being poured into every scene.

I feel like I have to trust my instincts and give myself permission to do this. I'm so motivated for this, it feels like a manic state (except I'm not cool enough to be bipolar).

After this episode I will need your feedback to either rein me back in because I'm over-editing, or let me know this was the right call because it's hotter than usual. I'm too close to it to know.


How long will it take?

It's nearly done.  I know I've been saying that for two weeks, but it's nearly done.

There are basically three scenes left that I want to punch up (one of which I've been working on since 8AM today, and is nearly ready).  If I finish that tonight, then do both the others tomorrow, it'll be ready tomorrow.  If I do one punch up a day, it'll be Tuesday.  If one of the scenes takes two days, it'll be Wednesday. Etc. I want it to be tomorrow.

The release won't be perfect, I'm not polishing it to the point where I'm 100% happy and proud of it. Just getting it to the 'good enough' state and pushing it out to you for feedback.


Okay, that's it, I stopped working on it to write this report because I am stressed to fuck about it not being ready for you guys.  I hope it is going to be worth the delay. I'll keep working on it with everything I've got, I promise you will have it Soon™.

Comments (27)

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Natalie23f · November 11, 2023

Crush...youre doing WAY more than fine!!!!!

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MugiwaraKaisoku · August 13, 2023

Don't stress. We all know it will be worth the wait. Thanks for all your hard work.

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Xaxa · August 11, 2023

Crush, Everything Finnrock just said, plus "We all know its worth it, that's why we are here, and nobody is rushing you." <3

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Finnrock · August 8, 2023

Crush The reason I (and I suspect many of us) are supporting this project is because we think you do a good job at writing scenes. Something about your style resonates with us. If you think a change will improve the scene, then do it. We all trust your instincts, so you should too. As far as over-editing, I think you fall into the camp of "everyone is their own harshest critic". Everything I've seen from you so far has been very high quality (hence why I chose to support you). It's a hard thing to learn to say "good enough" and mean it, but I think you're work is high enough quality that "good enough" will still be spectacular. On that note, have you considered using the early access audience as a testing bed for new scenes? You could release scenes mid-editing process and get feedback from us, then edit them based on the feedback and post that to the free side. That way, you would know what potential problems we actually notice and what we don't. This might be more work for you, so maybe just do it once so you can get an idea of what things we do and don't catch. That might help you understand where to focus your efforts when editing. <3 Finnrock

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Karolina Q (NSFW) · August 7, 2023

❤️

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One of billions · August 7, 2023

I'm a little surprised at the tone of some negative comments here, I'm personally for a constructive dialog. It's better to describe one's emotions (for example my disappointment from a lack of update) than to act under the influence of those emotions and pressure the author or post some questionable information about update schedule or work ethics. That being said, I saw several good projects with very trustworthy authors and good release history slowly lose update speed almost to the point of stalling (1 or 2 releases per year). There probably is a variety of factors that affect this, but I wonder if an excessive support of any delays by patrons (e.g. always "take as much time as you need" even if releases come out slower and slower) has a role in this. I think we should seek some kind of balance and to achieve this we need 2 things: express our opinions in a constructive way and get some kind of feedback from the author. Crushstation posts regularly, is transparent in what he does and incorporates feedback from audience. As I see it, we already have most of what we need to find that elusive balance of authors creative freedom and audience expectations.

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John Brett · August 7, 2023

If you're changing your approach/methodology/style, and you think it's better, you're probably better off saying "it'll be another month" and take the pressure off from the supporters. So long as you still maintain whatever internal motivation/pressure you need in order to get the product out. I understand the frustrations of the other responders, but I'm fine with the wait - I think what you've produced so far shows that you can create something worth waiting for.

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Worldknower · August 6, 2023

How many scenes are in this update? Please dont rewrite your work a 100 times looking for improvements. Sometimes, "done, is good enough", and chasing perfect is a fools errand.

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Devilsangel013 · August 6, 2023

A couple of updates ago, before you introduced beat-sheats, is when you used to do this. Getting in your way from completing the update by getting stuck in the cycle to keep improving it and postponing release. Beat sheats was the way you worked through that problem and then streamlined quality and timed release. Don't fall into that rut again, you have been doing good since the last couple of updates. Making it hot and getting it out on time are both equally necessary. The best dish on the planet won't taste good if it isn't served when it is supposed to be served.

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Juan Homa · August 6, 2023

I really appreciate your honesty. I do write myself and know those moments of doubt all too well. And I know the following: If you yourself have the suspicion that you are over-editing, you almost certainly are. Let the chapters go, there’s no such thing as perfection. You can come back later if really necessary. It feels better in the long run - at least for me. That said, I immensly value your work here. As someone already said, it’s easily the best smut. So we will stick around even if one chapter feels not finished for you. So thank you and good luck and keep it up!

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Luna_Silver · August 6, 2023

I can't say I wasn't hoping it was an update that was posted when I got the notification, But I understand that your work takes time and is always worth the wait. Will the extra effort you invested at the cost of delays make a significant improvement in the game is something we all are looking forward to finding out. You're "previous level" of writing was already very good in my opinion as someone who has been following the game for some time, and I always enjoy the updates. Something you could consider is when you get done putting the scenes into the system and have the first rough edit of it, you could post that version to patrons so that we can have some content in the meantime, and we can see just how much the content improves over the time you spend polishing it. Overall just wanted to say I always enjoy your work, but I'd also like more definitive deadlines going forward, even if it is further away.

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Steve C · August 6, 2023

I’m surprised at all the negative comments in here. Normally, we’ve all been pretty patient. I’d hoped that streak would continue. As for me, I’m perfectly fine waiting on perfection. Your nearly finished updates are still better than most game developers’ finished updates.

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Micheal Jackson · August 17, 2023

the reason people dont wait for "perfection" is because it isnt real, its a fools idea. there is a old saying "done is better than perfect".

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BB · August 6, 2023

You must be a farmer. 🐄🥛 the teat is getting sore! Games with actual graphics, animation, and good story move along faster than this. It would be understandable if there were choices that actually branched out and made a difference. It's a very good story, but that's what it is, a story. It's a long time in between releases for 20 minutes' worth of reading. But hey, you're laughing all the way to the bank 🤣

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jdanarchy · August 6, 2023

This! If there were multiple branches and different story lines, i could understand. But the story is still very linear and she IS’NT EVEN A BARGIRL YET, WHICH IS THE MAIN POINT OF THE STORY! This game is never getting done.

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Hoyomojo · August 6, 2023

There's an expression, "Perfect is the enemy of good." Nobody wants you to sacrifice your artistic integrity, but for me personally, I subscribed for good content (which it has been so far!) While I admire your pursuit of excellence, I can't deny that the constant "almost there" posts leave me disappointed. Maybe you could release what you have for your beta releases, and do your polishing up of scenes for your final releases. Just like you had placeholder texts and images for some of your earlier work. Anyway, just my thoughts, it's still my favorite game and only one of two projects I'm willing to put my hard earn money into supporting.

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Hoyomojo · August 6, 2023

Also want to add, that sometimes putting out "imperfect" work is a good thing. Most of your community is very supportive, and that is how you can get constructive feedback on what sounds good, and what needs improvement.

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Ornithorhynchus · August 6, 2023

Soon? How about Now! Sorry pal, but you're stalling. Again. > It's nearly done. I know I've been saying that for two weeks, but it's nearly done. Weeks? A little over two months ago, you told us: 2023-06-05 -- [1.19] Storyboard complete! Unfortunately, imps must have stolen some of it, because three weeks later: 2023-06-26 -- [1.19] Storyboard 89% done [220/248] However, the imps seemed to be caught quickly, or so I thought 2023-07-03 -- [1.19] Storyboard 100%, now polishing Polishing something that is "complete!" or "100%" must be serious business though, for you went on for week after week: 2023-07-10 -- [1.19] Almost there... 2023-07-17 -- [1.19] Still polishing... 2023-07-23 -- [1.19] Still not quite ready... 2023-07-31 -- [1.19] Nearly there... 2023-08-07 -- [1.19] Soon(TM) I've been in software development for like 40 years now. I also know stuff takes time. All I'm asking for is a reliable estimation, because otherwise you're going to alienate a loyal fan base. Oh, and maybe do think about a consistent "Definition of Done".

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Heresiarch · August 6, 2023

Maybe tone it down a little? Crush is more open about delays than a *lot* of software developers out there; just sayin'.

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vladeemer · August 6, 2023

If it's hot to you, then you're doing it right. Looking forward to it!

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AlternativeInSight · August 6, 2023

Still on schedule for the Oct 31 release date. 👍

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IbizaDalton · August 6, 2023

crying

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Xerrol Nanoha · August 6, 2023

you're doing great 😊 do work that you are proud of, don't let the anxiety hold you back

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Anthony387 · August 7, 2023

Downplaying the value of mental health? Grow up.

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Marlow · August 6, 2023

I see a lot of great creators make the mistake of thinking iteration doesn't exist: don't be scared to release something not 100%! You can always go back and tweak it later. Ie that random mechanic you teased a few months ago, nothing stopping you from going back and adding that in earlier shifts. Or the heroines first meeting with the floor manager (Scottish guy forgot his name lol), I always thought that scene should be more of a "before and after" for the heroine. Not a thing wrong with going back and iterating

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Marlow · August 6, 2023

But to double back on myself this game is legit the best smut on the internet so idk lol just hurry up and have the heroine get fake tits already ffs

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Micheal Lenik · August 6, 2023

I think you might be starting to get george rr martin syndrome.