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Hi everyone.

Thanks to your comments on my last post, I realized I should probably go back and read my own work from the very beginning. I had forgotten so many of the settings, and I figured that maybe, just maybe, my writing wasn't as terrible as I had imagined.

Even with that thought in mind, I still hesitated for two whole days before finally clicking it open.

Going into it, I had expected that—

I would be overwhelmed by intense embarrassment and cringe.

I would get trapped in editing hell, endlessly deleting and rewriting sentences.

I assumed that the world-building and characters I hadn't carefully planned out back then would result in massive chaos and plot holes.

But... none of that happened.

I ended up reading the entire story almost obsessively, barely changing a single line. As I read, I found myself laughing and crying at my screen.

I laughed because—how the fuck did I write so incredibly well back then?

I cried because the version of me who could write those words so effortlessly and without any burden feels like that part of me died amidst the illness and pain.

The Ulith from two years ago had no idea that I would get sick, go on hiatus, and go through so many struggles. But relying purely on instinct, my past self left behind these unpolished yet absolutely sparkling words as a gift to the future me.

Maybe I can't bring that past Ulith back, but I have, without a doubt, received her gift.

Thank you all so much. If it weren't for your replies and encouragement, I might still not have found the courage to face my past.