Hi friends.

I’ve almost finished a new chapter about my trip… almost , because my hands and brain argue about who’s lazier today. Mood chose “post about updates,” so here I am philosophizing.

Now about my jaw saga.
Finally, I got a mouthguard for my joints — a little technical miracle reminding me that comfort is a myth. It’s horribly uncomfortable, talking with it is nearly impossible, and by evening my head turns into a personal arthouse of suffering: chewing muscles protest, teeth and gums strike. Pills help, but only briefly.
The next day the doctor took my mouthguard away to have it slightly altered, because the pain was unbearable. So I wait again: two weeks for a new one, three months of wearing it, then diagnosis, then orthodontist… maybe braces next winter. A plot like an endless series: suffering, waiting, a little hope.

Mood still sucks. I cry every day, especially in the evening, when apathy comes like an uninvited guest. The only savior — headstands. Proud of myself, honestly: discipline and I — longtime enemies, and I managed to outsmart it for a minute.

Creativity also saves me: my collages journals almost end. This Sunday I plan a trip to the vintage market — the place where you can find everything humanity ever lost.
Goal: vintage postcards, journals, newspapers for my tarot cards. Headstands plus creativity — my only salvation. Too bad I can’t do both at the same time.

Evenings are drama: sadness hits like a tidal wave, and I let my emotions out. I continue learning Polish and preparing for the exam, hoping to finish before the tax office decides I’m too happy and reminds me of itself.

Instagram still deleted, support not answering , patience almost gone. Sleep and appetite bad, want to talk to no one, stay home like a domestic ghost.

But you know what? Even in this chaos, there are small victories: I do headstands, make cards, live… and that’s already something. For me life is a mix of pain, creativity, and tiny joys.