Outer Masks - Chapter 18: Jealousy

Four Days Later

Nothing makes sense anymore. How could you do this to me, Beck? Joe thought as he lay face down in bed. He had not left his apartment since his and Beck’s breakup, choosing to wallow in his heartbreak and sorrow.

Love doesn’t exist, how can it when the woman of my dreams chooses to leave me instead of sticking it out and working on our relationship? How can love exist when you have decided to stomp on my heart over and over again, Beck? I will never know love again; I will never recover from this utter betrayal and pain.

“Joe? Are you in here?” Joe could hear the voice of his sister along with the sound of his door closing behind her.

I regret giving her a key.

Rory eventually turned the corner and found the broken mess that was her older brother. “Hey, Joey.”

“What are you doing here?” Joe asked, his voice muffled by his pillow as he refused to lift his head.

“You’ve been ignoring my calls and texts, and I haven’t seen you in days. Had to make sure you didn’t die in here.” Rory said, looking around the apartment and seeing the trash, half-eaten food, and discarded clothes that were strewn about.

Joe buried his face deeper into his pillow, “I’m still alive, you can go now.”

Rory instead sat down on the corner of Joe’s bed, “Look, I know that the breakup was hard for you-”

Joe let out a loud groan and, begrudgingly, pushed himself onto his arms, “Rory, I really don’t want to hear your ‘it’s going to get better’ speech. I just want to lie here and curse the day I ever laid eyes on Guinevere Beck.”

Rory sighed, “You really loved her, didn’t you?”

“Of course I did.” Joe muttered, “And now she’s gone, she broke up with me... over a misunderstanding and is refusing to hear anything I have to say.”

“Wait, have you been calling Beck this whole time?”

Joe did not say anything; his silence answered Rory’s question for him.

“Joe...” Rory groaned, placing a hand on her forehead, “Why would you do that?”

Joe looked away, “I just wanted to explain myself. And it doesn’t matter anyway because she’s been ignoring me.”

Not once had Beck responded to the numerous calls and texts that Joe had sent her. He had held out hope that he would eventually be able to break Beck's resolve, and she would have to respond.

But this small hope was instantly crushed when he woke up this morning, texted Beck, and saw that she had blocked him.

Rory sighed, and Joe hated the pity that he could see in her eyes. “Joe, I think you just need to give her some space. You’re not going to convince her to get back together with you by hounding her like this.”

“And what if I give her space and she never wants to take me back?”

“Then you just got to accept that and move on.”

Can I really do that? Can I really just let you go, Beck? After everything I did to make this relationship work?

“Now.” Rory said as she stood up, “Get up, you’ve been lying in your own filth for way too long, and you definitely need to get out of this apartment.”

“You’re not going to leave, are you?” Joe drawled.

“Nope.” Rory grinned, “So, come on. I’m not afraid to drag you out of bed, you know.”

Joe groaned, wishing that he had a sibling who cared a little less about his well-being, as Rory started to pull him out from under his blanket.

~X~

Two Weeks Later

Peach Salinger was not a happy woman.

Right now, for the first time since she was outed, Peach had left her townhouse and was walking through the streets with a permanent scowl fixed on her face.

Her expression greatly contrasted with those of her best friends, each having a tentative smile on their faces. The trio had forced Peach out of her house, refusing to leave until she agreed to come with them.

“See?” Beck said as she spread her arms out, spinning around to look at Peach, her smile growing, “No one’s looking at you or talking about you behind your back, or taking pictures of you. See? No one cares about you.”

“Yes, I’m so glad that the unwashed masses aren’t buzzing round me waiting for me to fuck up more than I already have,” Peach said sarcastically.

It was not the average person that she was worried about, but those who ran in the same circles and belonged to the same tax bracket as her. After all, they were walking through Tribeca, who knows who they could run into here?

“You’ll feel better when we get to Bergdorf. They just released their newest collection, and I already know what I’m going to buy.” Annika said to Peach.

Peach huffed, “I guess some shopping could do me some good.”

“That’s the spirit, girl.” Lynn said cheerily before becoming serious, “And we can even get you a whole new wardrobe if you want, we accept you know matter what, so if you want to dress how you want to express who you really are, then we support you.”

Being... I’m going to start dressing like a lesbian stereotype from 2004. Peach did not bother to hide her grimace; she hated how over the top her friends were acting to try to make all of this seem normal.

When they finally reached Bergdorf Goodman, Peach walked through the store anxiously, looking over her shoulder, still worried that someone important would see her. She was only able to relax when Beck, Annika, and Lynn became distracted by various items, which allowed her to walk away from them.

Peach sighed as she looked around, nothing standing out to her as she walked, wishing that she had not allowed the others to talk her into this.

“Oh my God, Peach? Peach Salinger?” Peach felt a mixture of irritation and dread when she heard a familiar perky voice call out to her from behind.

When Peach turned her head, she saw a short Caucasian woman with long blonde hair and large brown eyes, who was dressed in the gaudiest colors that made Peach feel like her eyes were being burned the longer she looked at them.

Chelsea Branham was the most annoying attention whore that Peach had the displeasure of knowing, and that look of superiority and fake kindness she always wore angered Peach further as she watched the other woman approach with her gaggle of mindless followers.

“Peach.” Chelsea said, her smile growing, “I thought that was you. How have you been?

“I’ve been doing great, Chelsea,” Peach said, fighting the urge to sneer at her.

“That’s good, it’s been forever since I last saw you, so I was worried.” Chelsea said, “I mean, I had assumed that you may have started using again.”

Peach and Chelsea had known each other since they were five years old, having gone to the same schools, and because their fathers were in the same line of work, they were forced to spend even more time together, to both of their despair.

This fucking bitch. Peach thought, knowing that Chelsea was referring to her stint in rehab when they were in high school. Peach’s smile became sharper, “Still sober, thank God for that. And I’m sorry to have worried you so much, but I’ve simply been busy; some of us have more important things to do than wait around for our lovers to pay attention to us again while they're busy sleeping with other people.”

Peach felt nothing but satisfaction as she heard Chelsea’s minions gasp, looking between the two of them with shock and fear.

Chelsea’s smile fell away, and she glared at Peach, “Logan is my boyfriend, I’ll have you know that we’re exclusive.”

“Does he know either of those things?” Peach asked, “I’d hate for him to be confused about where you two stand, as he has been since tenth grade.”

Chelsea looked as if she wanted to slap Peach, and Peach welcomed the idea, wanting something that she could take her anger out on and being confident that she could take the much smaller woman in a fight.

But the other woman composed herself, and soon Chelsea was giving Peach a vindictive smile, “Well, I suppose it would make sense why you are and always have been so confused about real relationships, given what team you play for.”

Peach knew it was too good to be true that Chelsea, of all people, would not have seen the picture and would not try to use it against her.

Seeing Peach clamp up, Chelsea’s smile grew as she needled the other woman, “It should have been obvious that you’re a lesbian. I mean, the way you were always staring at everyone in the locker room? And that girl you’re so close to, what was her name? Beck or something dumb like that. To be honest, I’m less surprised that you enjoy slumming it with your little blonde welfare charity case, but that you’re apparently fucking Walter Hayden’s daughter. Isn’t she the one who her parents are so ashamed of that they’ve been hiding her from the public for years? What great taste you have, Peach.”

What. The. Fuck? Peach clenched her fists, a rage overcoming her as she glared at Chelsea.

“I guess you don’t care about the embarrassment of it all, then? You have far stronger skin than I do, Peach, if you knew half the things people are saying about you then-”

“Then what? You think I should care what an anorexic, silicon-stuffed, future baby mama and her gaggle of brain-dead sluts think of me?” Peach hissed.

Chelsea’s eyes widened, and her friends gasped again from behind her, looking at Peach as if she had lost her mind.

Peach did not care; she would be damned if she allowed Chelsea Branham of all people to think she was better than her; her pride would not allow such. So, it did not matter if Peach was still unable to come to terms with being outed and still felt shame about her sexuality; she was not going to stand there and be insulted because of it.

“Y-you can’t speak to me like-”

“Oh, I can’t? Then what are you going to do about it?”

Chelsea’s mouth opened and closed like a fish, still staring at Peach in shock.

“That’s what I thought.” Peach sneered, “Honestly, you should be focusing on the pathetic trainwreck that you call a life instead of thinking that I have anything to be ashamed of, and that someone as worthless as you can have anything over me that you can feel superior about. Now walk away, Branham, before you embarrass yourself even more.”

“I-I-I have never! You are such a.... Ugh! Come on, it seems this store is just accepting any rejects that come in here!” Chelsea said to her followers, glaring at Peach one last time before turning on her heel and immediately leaving the store.

Peach watched the group leave, feeling nothing but anger at the thought of Chelsea and the fools that Peach had long since written off were mocking her behind her back. She had expected this, but seeing it firsthand was infuriating as much as it was soul-crushing.

“Hey, wasn’t that Chelsea Branham?” Peach heard Annika ask as she rejoined her, “I thought you two didn’t like each other?”

“We don’t,” Peach said plainly.

Annika glanced at the doors, “So what were you talking about?”

Peach glared at the other woman, “What do you think, Annika?”

Annika did not respond; understanding was written all over her face, and Peach hated the look of pity Annika was now giving her. “Peach, I-”

“Save it, and don’t tell Lynn and Beck either, the last thing I need is those two trying to reassure me or whatever.”

Just as she was trying to walk away, Annika grabbed Peach’s arm, pulling her back, “Peach, wait. Look, I think you’re a massive bitch a lot of the time.”

“Excuse me?” Peach asked as if she had misheard Annika.

“Let’s not act like you’re not.” Annika said plainly, “You’re a crazy bitch, hell, all four of us are bitches, maybe that’s why we're able to still be best friends even when we say and do some out-of-pocket shit to each other, and I hate seeing you like this. This isn’t you, you’re not the kind of person who hides from the world when things don’t go her way, and you don’t let people like Chelsea Branham act like they’re in the same league as you.”

“Is there a point to this crap?” Peach asked, although she had yet to pull her arm out of Annika’s hand.

Annika sighed, “My point is that I’m not going to act like I understand what you’re going through right now because I don’t, but I know that staying like this isn’t doing anything to help. Peach, everyone saw that picture of you and Rory, and everyone knows that you’re not straight and there’s nothing you can do to change that. So, are you going to spend the rest of your life wallowing in your own pity or are you going to show the world that you’re Peach fucking Salinger and that they have no right to judge you because you’re better than all of them?”

Peach stared at Annika with a blank expression on her face. As much as she hated to admit it, Annika’s speech was comforting in a way, even if her emotions were still raw.

But Peach had lived most of her life wearing a mask, hiding a part of herself from the world out of fear of judgment and abandonment, so could she not just keep doing the same?

Annika was right that continuing to hide away was not a viable option, nor did she really want to.

And even if I am... not... even if I’m... gay, I’m still leagues better than everyone else. If I’m dirt, then they’re lower than dirt.

As Peach remained silent, Annika became worried that what she said had the opposite effect on her, “Peach, are you good? I didn’t mean-”

“Thanks, Annika,” Peach whispered.

Did Peach just thank me?! Annika thought, staring at the other woman wide-eyed.

Peach frowned when she saw Annika's expression, knowing what she was thinking, “Don’t make this weird.”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” Annika muttered.

Peach rolled her eyes before the two of them started looking around for Beck and Lynn, with Peach wanting to leave the awkward moment behind them.

~X~

One Week Later

When Rory had gone to Joe's apartment to visit him, she had not been expecting to see someone who clearly was not her brother answering the door.

The person was a young, beautiful African American woman with curly and kinky black hair and brown eyes. She was wearing nursing scrubs and had a small smile on her face as she stared at Rory questioningly.

“Hi, um, is Joe here?” Rory asked.

“He’s in the shower, and you are?” The woman asked.

“I’m Rory.”

The woman’s eyes lit up, “Oh, you’re Rory, I was wondering when I would get to meet you. I’m Karen, Karen Minty.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Karen,” Rory said as Karen stepped aside and let her into the apartment.

Before either of them could say anything else, Joe entered the living room, using a towel to dry his hair, smiling as he caught sight of the two of them. “I see you two have met.”

“We have,” Rory said plainly, not knowing what else to say as she watched Joe wrap an arm around Karen’s waist.

“Oh, right, Rory, this is my girlfriend, Karen, she’s Claudia’s best friend and coworker. And baby, this is my kid sister, Rory.” Joe said, realizing that his sister had no idea who Karen was to him.

“I didn’t know you started dating again,” Rory said.

Girlfriend? What do you mean by girlfriend? Just last week, you were still moping over Beck? What the fuck happened since then? Rory thought.

The last time Rory had spoken to her brother was three days ago over the phone, and Joe had not once in their almost forty-minute conversation alluded to the idea of dating again, let alone already being in a new relationship.

Joe’s smile grew as he glanced at Karen, “I didn’t think I would ever move on, but I realized how shortsighted I was. All I needed to do was open my heart up a little bit, and I found the perfect woman.”

“Oh, Joe, you’re so sweet,” Karen said, kissing him on the cheek.

“Well, I’m happy for you, Joey,” Rory said, still confused by how quickly her brother’s change in attitude had formed.

Joe’s smile grew, “Thank you, Rory. I’ve ever been happier than I am right now.”

Rory felt like her brother was laying it a bit thick with the whole thing, not truly believing that he was as over Beck as he was currently acting like he was. While Rory’s feelings towards Beck were complicated, especially since Beck was Joe’s girlfriend, she could tell that Joe really loved Beck, or at least Joe thought he did.

So, it was not believable that Joe could have moved on so quickly, and in Rory’s opinion, was more likely using Karen as a rebound.

“So, Joe tells me that you’re the head of Business Development at Hayden International. What’s that like?” Karen asked as the trio sat down.

Rory chuckled, “Exhausting, one of these days I think my hand is going to fall off from all the paperwork I have to do. Although I can imagine that my job is way less stressful than being a nurse.”

“Oh, you have no idea,” Karen said, launching into a retelling of how today was for her, prefacing by stating how today was a slow day.

See, Beck, I’ve moved on, completely and totally with Karen. I mean, Rory likes her already, and Karen clearly likes her back, which is a great sign. This is going to work; I know it will. Joe thought as he watched the two women converse.

~X~

Rory smiled as she caught sight of the four sitting at a corner table of the club, more specifically, she smiled when she caught sight of Peach.

“Stop grinning like that, you look like an idiot.” Rory rolled her eyes at Max’s words and elbowed him in his side for good measure.

“Excuse me for being in a good mood, asshole,” Rory said as they walked through the crowded dance floor.

Max rolled his eyes, shouting back, “You would think that you’re going to see your girlfriend with that kind of enthusiasm.”

Rory glared at Max; he had not tried to hide how much he believed that Rory was just screwing herself by continuing to be friends with Peach after everything, believing that she was just setting herself up for more pain. “Shouldn’t you be focusing on another way to make Annika jealous tonight or whatever?”

“I won’t be doing that anymore, "I realized it was pretty pathetic to keep doing it. If Annika doesn’t want me, then that’s her loss.”

Rory looked at him with confusion, “Did you suddenly become more mature in the last ten seconds?”

Max snorted, “No, I saw how you’ve been chasing after Peach and, unlike you, decided that I could do better for myself, along with getting some damn self-respect.”

Rory turned around and was about to let Max have it when she heard their names being called and decided to save the potential argument for later. When they reached the group, room was made for them to sit at the ends of the table.

“Hey.” Rory said as she sat down next to Peach.”

“Hey,” Peach said back, a smile quickly forming on her face.

“Gross,” Max muttered under his breath as he sat next to Lynn on the other side of the table.

“Congratulations, Beck! It’s not every day you can say you know a famous author!” Rory said to the woman sitting on Peach’s other side.

Beck smiled, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear. “Famous? Yeah, right. It’s not that big a deal.”

“Not a big deal?” Annika said incredulously, staring at Beck like she had grown a second head, “You got your short story published in The New Yorker! Don’t be modest.”

“It will probably be forgotten in a few days.”

“Oh my God, Beck. Just accept that you’re a published writer and let us celebrate this.” Peach groaned, having grown tired of hearing the other woman make the same complaint ever since she found out that her submission had been accepted.

When Allison Mott, the English professor for whom she was the teaching assistant, had suggested that she submit the story she had read aloud for their writing workshop for a contest the magazine was holding, Beck had been hesitant. She did not see the point in submitting her work when she was so sure she would be rejected, given how competitive the selection process was for The New Yorker.

The second and more secretive reason was that the story that Beck had written was about a woman who had spent years trying to appease a father who was both apathetic and controlling over her, only to finally realize that she deserved better and cut him off for good.

While this, on its own, would be fine, Beck had used characteristics from both Edward and Joe when making the main character’s father.

The thought of either of them reading the story filled Beck with dread, and it was only because Blythe spent days convincing her that she ended up listening to Allison.

Beck’s smile grew, a laugh leaving her lips, “I guess you’re right.”

“Of course I’m fucking right,” Peach said.

“So, are we-” Rory paused as she caught sight of Ethan and Blythe on the dance floor, “What the hell?”

The couple was basically trying to meld together into one person as they danced, their arms wrapped around each other tightly as they swayed, ignoring the fast beat of the music playing in the club and the people they were bumping into.

Max laughed when he saw what his best friend was looking at, “Well, you can’t say that they aren’t enjoying themselves.”

“I guess I can’t.” Rory muttered, “I’m going to get a drink, you want anything?”

“Ooo, get me five-no, six shots.”

Rory stared at him blankly, “Just for you?”

“Yeah, we got here late. I have to catch up, Roro. Clubs aren’t fun when you’re sober.” Max said, looking at Rory as if she were slow.

Rory rolled her eyes, standing up and making her way to the bar, groaning silently when she saw that said bar was currently crowded and with only two bartenders present.

“So why are you hesitant about people reading your story?” Max asked, knowing that if he were in Beck’s shoes, he would be far more celebratory about it, bragging to everyone who would listen.

“She doesn’t want people to know that she based it on her and Joe’s relationship,” Lynn replied before Beck could think of what to say.

“Lynn!” Beck exclaimed.

Lynn was unrepentant, “What? It’s the truth, isn’t it? And I don’t think you should even be worried about Joe finding out if half of what you wrote about was true. Like, honestly, I was shocked when I read your story. I thought Joe was a nice guy, but he came off as an ass.”

Beck looked down at the table, “Joe isn’t like that; most of what I wrote was just an exaggeration. I was venting.”

“Yeah, an exaggeration,” Peach said sarcastically while rolling her eyes.

“So, you’re scared of hurting Joey’s feelings?” Max asked as he leaned back, “That’s dumb, trust me, Beck, Joey won't care, especially since he’s already moved on.”

“Moved on?” Beck asked, trying and failing not to sound like she cared, “Joe is dating again?”

“He has a girlfriend, apparently. Been dating for a few weeks now.” Max answered.

“What are we talking about?” Ethan asked as he and Blythe returned to the table.

“Joe has a new girlfriend,” Lynn said, glancing at Beck and Max.

“Oh, you mean Karen?” Ethan asked.”

“You’ve met her?” Beck asked.

“Yeah, she’s great, she’s been coming by Mooney’s for a while now. She really livens up the place, and Joe, too. I don’t think I’ve seen him smile as much before when speaking to someone.” Ethan said, smiling obliviously.

“Babe.” Blythe stressed, “You can’t just say that in front of Beck. She already feels like shit; we don’t need to add to it by pointing out Joe moved on.”

“Oh, right. Karen was okay, definitely not all that.” Ethan exaggerated, as if everyone at the table didn’t hear what Blythe said.

“Guys, I’m fine. Good for Joe, I’m happy for him.” Beck said casually.

Despite her words, Beck felt the urge to grab her phone and look up Karen and find out just who Joe replaced her with.

This, however, was not fooling anyone, and Peach leaned in close to Beck, looking at her plainly, “Hey, we’re here to focus on you finally getting the recognition you deserve and getting put in a famous magazine, not crusty Goldberg and his newest victim.”

“I don’t care what Joe is doing, Peach.” Beck said, grinning at the other woman, “And don’t call him crusty.”

Peach huffed, “Good then.”

“Great,” Beck said, her smile growing sharper.

I don’t care about what Joe’s doing or who. I don’t need him. I’m glad that Joe’s moving on. Beck thought, trying to persuade herself.

~X~

Rory let out a sigh of relief when she finally got her and Max’s drinks after almost fifteen minutes of waiting. And just when she lifted the tray and turned around, someone bumped into her, knocking the drinks all over her shirt.

“Oh, fuck! I’m sorry.” Rory heard a voice shout before suddenly feeling and seeing someone trying to wipe down her now soaked top with their hands.

Rory jumped, immediately grabbing their hands and looking up, her breath catching in her throat as she took in the other person and her eyes widening in shock.

She was shorter than Rory by a few inches, even with the heels on her feet; her blonde hair shone even under the LED lights of the nightclub, falling down her back in waves. She was unfairly beautiful with high cheekbones, full, well-defined lips, smooth pale skin, large blue eyes, and was dressed in a black one-shoulder mini dress that clung to her generous figure.

“Hailey,” Rory said, letting go of the other woman’s hands.

“Rory?” Hailey asked, looking just as shocked as Rory, “What are you doing here? I thought you-”

“I came back a little while ago,” Rory said, wanting nothing more than to run away and hide somewhere.

Rory never thought that she would ever see Hailey Andrews again, not after what Hailey had done to her all those years ago. Before now, if you had asked Rory if she had gotten over it, she would have said yes, but now, all she could do was stand there overwhelmed by the rush of old pain, embarrassment, and anger.

“Ugh! What is taking Rory so long?” Max whined, sinking into his seat, resting his head on Lynn's shoulder.

Peach rolled her eyes, turning her head to look in the direction of the bar, her body becoming deathly still as she took in the sight of Rory standing close to a blonde woman. “Who the fuck is that?”

Everyone at the table turned to the bar to see who Peach was referring to, watching as Rory and the other woman stared at each other.

Max smirked at first and was going to ask if Peach was jealous before he had gotten a good look at the blonde woman, and the smirk died, replaced with a twisted snarl. “That fucking bitch!”

The others could only watch as Max jumped to his feet, quickly storming over to the pair, ignoring the people he knocked into on the way.

“Rory,” Hailey said, and Rory did not know how to feel about the pity and shame that was now strewn across her features. “I... I don’t know... I really should... I’m so-”

“She doesn’t need to hear anything from you.” Both women jumped when they heard Max’s voice, seeing the terrible scowl on his face as he stared at Hailey.

Max then grabbed Rory by the shoulder and pulled her away, still scowling at Hailey as he led Rory away.

“Are you okay?” Max asked, having finally turned around and looking at his friend with concern.

“I...I...” Rory swallowed, struggling to speak with how tight her throat felt in that moment, “I... I-I need to leave.”

Max nodded his head, “Alright, let go.”

The two ignored the others as they tried to walk past the table, but Peach was not going to let them leave so easily, grabbing Rory’s arm. “Hey! What’s wrong? Where are you-”

“Peach, I need to go.” Rory said, yanking her arm out of Peach’s hand, “I can’t stay here. I’m sorry.”

Peach watched as Rory and Max walked across the dance floor and out of the doors, wondering what had just happened.

“What the hell was that about?” Annika asked, still staring at the club doors.

“I don’t know, but it had something to do with that woman,” Lynn said, jutting her chin towards Hailey.

When Peach turned back around, Hailey was still standing in the same spot, looking at the doors like a sad puppy longing for its owner, and this angered Peach, rightfully viewing her as the reason why Rory had left so upset.

Even without seeing Rory’s reaction, the fact that she could recognize the look on Hailey’s face burned Peach more than she cared to admit, and all she could do was imagine countless scenarios that could explain it, each one more heart-wrenching than the last.

Beck reached out to hold Peach’s hand, knowing that Peach was a few seconds away from jumping out of her seat and accosting Hailey. “Calm down, Peach. Don’t go flying off the handle now.”

“Calm down?” Peach hissed, “After what she did?”

Beck rolled her eyes, “You don’t even know what she did.”

Peach pulled her hand out from under Beck’s, “I know she’s the reason Rory and Max practically ran out of here. I know that Max clearly knows who she is and that she’s a fucking bitch.”

Peach turned back and glared at the blonde, and this time ended up catching Hailey’s eyes. The blonde woman looked at her, confused, not understanding why a total stranger was glaring at her, and eventually walked away, disappearing amongst the crowd.

Peach clicked her teeth, her good mood thoroughly ruined even as the others tried to move past the awkward moment and pretend that Rory and Max did not leave in an unexplained hurry.