Red Sonja (1985)
Sword and sandals this week ActionBabyz. The Boyz return to the Hyborian Age and have a nice little visit with RED SONJA. This type of movie is right in the sweet spot for the ABZ; the locations, sets and cast look amazing while the performances fucking suck. Neilsen and Schwarzenegger look incredible together but manage to be boring with their 63 minute play-fight (them tapping their swords together) that's supposed to be sexy? All the footage they had of Arnold/Kalidor, not Conan, is shamelessly hamfisted in to the final cut of this 89 minute movie that still feels long. Go watch the movie and listen to this episode, there's nothing left to say - you're all masters now. We can't teach you anymore, go pick out a sword. Don't worry, an unexplained ghost-princess will help you choose the right one.
Comments (17)
I felt that “you gotta throw away your subway signs you stole from the f train that you’ve had since you were 19”
Hell yeah
Also can't believe they didn't clock Pat Roach.
Im crazy late but I just saw this movie for the first time. I liked it.
Watching this on HBOMax now and using this episode for my long holiday drive coming up
Got 25 mins into this movie before I realized it was the French dub
Your sister is dead.
The 'it's a hot butt--it's your dad's butt--he's piloting the Challenger into the twin towers' bit! A+
Gabrus, please hire me to do the poster for CHUNK NORRIS, I already have several ideas for it.
I need this.
Really phoned in the exit bit on this one
Oh fuck, my debit card got declined. Oh fuck. FUCK THAT. I GOT MY PAYPAL FOR THIS $9 INVESTMENT. PRAISE THE PORCELIN GODS!
"sniveling lackey who cannot comprehend a wife's decorating style" is a great new character
What is this Red Sonja, or kink.com over here.
Hey what happened to the new theme song?
I haven’t seen this movie in a long time and I’m almost afraid to watch it now or listen to this episode because I know as an adult Ernie Reys Jr. is probably annoying AF in this movie and does not hold up at all. My brother and I loved this movie when we were younger though and we loved Ernie in everything. These days kids help ruin pretty much everything (Homeland, Walking Dead etc.)
Ernie's performance in this movie is truly disastrous but he still does a better job than virtually every adult in the cast.