The Shadow's Game - Part 1

Finding her wasn’t difficult. You just had to follow the trail of cigarette smoke she left wherever she went. Almost always alone, just like me — though in her case, by choice — walking unhurriedly through the halls where students no longer raised an eyebrow at her rebellious outfits.

That afternoon, I waited for Mr. Ramsey to dismiss the restless class eager to enjoy the weekend and rushed out the door, my things packed long before. My anxiety wasn’t about celebrating Friday at yet another party I wasn’t invited to, but rather to sneak around and watch Megan leave the room next door.

She walked distractedly and quickly, rummaging through her backpack — probably for her pack of cigarettes — and I had to pick up my pace to catch her before she turned the corner and disappeared from sight.

“Megan!” I called, slightly breathless.

Her boots stopped on the sidewalk, and the unlit cigarette seemed ready to fall from her chapped lips as she turned slowly, brown eyes smudged with heavy black makeup filled with indifference at seeing me behind her. She didn’t reply, but her gaze dared me to continue whatever I had to say.

“I… I need to know, Megan,” I gripped the strap of my backpack on my shoulder, summoning the courage that had brought me there in the first place. “Why did you do that?”

Still silent, Megan stepped aside and leaned against the dirty wall of the lot next to the school. Her hair looked orange under the setting sun, and she took her time lighting the cigarette with a yellow plastic lighter. She took a long drag, staring at the street and pretending to consider my question.

I shifted my weight from foot to foot as I waited for her to speak, the breeze lightly rustling her skirt that was so short it left very little to the imagination.

“That what, exactly?” She finally responded, blowing the smoke softly, looking almost bored. One eyebrow lifted, and her tone was ironic. “Blow you?”

I felt heat rush up my neck, embarrassment mixing with anger. I clenched my fists, short nails digging into my palms.

“Didn’t know one fuck would get you so worked up, kid,” she continued. “I thought you’d be grateful, you know, that I popped your cherry…”

“You know that’s not what I’m talking about!” I said through gritted teeth, ignoring the fact that my face was bright red. “Why did you run off with my stuff and leave me there? Without clothes and…”

Without dignity, I completed silently.

“Are you seriously still hung up on that?” She scoffed, flicking ash from her cigarette. “Get over it, grow up.”

“It’s easy for you to say — you didn’t end up with the nickname Storage Streaker’!”

Unfazed, Megan took another drag from her cigarette and rolled her eyes, clearly tired of me.

“Do you want to compete with how many nicknames I’ve earned around here, streaker?” she snapped, already losing patience. “It was just a joke, stop being such a drama queen.”

“A joke? That wasn’t a joke, Megan. That was humiliation, and I know you know it. I just want to know… what did I do to you?”

I still didn’t know what had driven me to confront Megan, nor what I expected to gain from it. An apology? Regret?

All I was getting was more disdain, but something made me keep trying despite Megan Wood’s beautiful, irritated face.

“Look, that’s probably why Brian picks on you so much, you know? Can’t even take a joke…”

“Brian?” I repeated, and she froze for a moment before looking away, trying to cover her slip. “Brian Powell? He wanted you to do that to me?”

Her boots tapped impatiently on the sidewalk, and she seemed annoyed with herself for letting that slip, but of course, she tried to maintain her indifferent stance.

“Look, kid,” she insisted on not saying my name, and I wasn’t sure if it was on purpose or if she genuinely didn’t know it. “Brian has… his ways. If you take everything he does seriously, you’ll end up hurt again. If I were you, I’d just ignore it and move on.”

I couldn’t say anything else. With one last drag, Megan tossed the cigarette butt to the ground, stamping it out with the sole of her boot. I barely noticed that she seemed uncomfortable when she looked at me before tossing her hair back and adjusting her backpack.

“Take care, kid,” she said quietly, turning on her heel and leaving me there, unable to move my feet.

*****

I arrived at school early, as usual. I still liked the quiet of the mornings before chaos erupted, the empty halls, and the few distant voices echoing at the entrance. It was the only time of day when school felt bearable.

I slung my backpack over my shoulder and walked through the gate, but as I entered the building, I felt a strange discomfort in the emptiness of the hallway. There was no one around, which was unusual even at that hour. The silence felt different, heavy, as if it were watching me.

Then, I saw them.

Brian and his two goons — Caleb and Derek — leaning casually against the lockers ahead. The three of them looked relaxed, but in a way that only worsened the feeling of threat. It was as if they knew I had nowhere to run.

As I approached, they moved. Caleb positioned himself to my left and Derek to my right, closing the space around me. Brian, of course, stood front and center, wearing his purple jacket and that crooked, dangerous smile that made me want to turn back.

“We’ve been waiting for you,” Brian began, his voice low and dripping with sarcasm.

I stopped, my heart pounding. I tried to stay calm, but I knew they could sense my hesitation.

“Why?” I managed to say, trying to sound indifferent.

“You know,” Brian took a step forward, “on Friday, someone went to talk to Megan and ask questions. You know who that was?”

My mouth went dry.

“I just… I just wanted to talk to her,” I said, taking a step back.

“Talk?” Brian repeated, tilting his head as if surprised. “You thought you could talk to her without me knowing, kid? She told me everything.”

My mind raced. Megan told him? Of course, she did.

Brian took another step and placed a hand on my shoulder, gripping it tightly.

“Let me give you a warning,” he growled, the smile vanishing from his face. “Stay away from Megan.”

Before I could react, I felt his fist connect with my stomach. The impact was sudden and strong, knocking the wind out of me. I staggered back, doubling over as I struggled to breathe.

“Do you hear me?” Brian continued, leaning close to my face. “If I see you near her again, it’ll be much worse.”

Caleb and Derek chuckled softly, their voices muffled as I tried to catch my breath.

“You should be grateful,” Brian said, stepping back. “Today was just a warning.”

I felt a nudge on my shoulder and blinked in surprise to see the teacher staring at me, and the entire class as well. I blinked slowly, my eyes adjusting to the light and my mind to the realization that I had left the hallway.

“Can you repeat what I just said?” she asked, eyebrows raised.

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. I had no idea how I had gotten there, let alone what she had been talking about.

“Sorry,” I mumbled, feeling my face flush. The class chuckled softly but quickly lost interest when the teacher turned away and resumed the lesson at the blackboard.

I tried to focus on the rest of the class, but my mind stayed trapped in that strange void I felt.

It must be the stress, I thought.

It wasn’t the first time time had slipped away like that… but it was normal, right? I’d been really tired, after all.

*****

“Hey, Big Boy.” Victoria’s voice filled my room before the door even finished opening. She walked in without knocking, as always, and flopped onto my bed, making the mattress creak under her slight weight.

I kept my eyes on the computer screen but had already lost half my focus on the game.

“Hey,” I muttered, trying to ignore her while my fingers tapped nervously on the keys.

“Take your face off that thing and talk to me!” She threw a pillow that hit me squarely on the back of my neck. The sudden movement made the wheeled chair shake, and the sound of ‘GAME OVER’ told me I’d lost the match.

“Fucking hell,” I muttered, slamming my fist on the desk and pushing back in the chair.

“Watch your mouth!” Victoria scolded, but she was laughing. “And be careful, don’t break anything or Grandma will get on us.”

I rolled my eyes but ended up laughing too. Her lightness was nice, even if rare. Since before Dad’s accident, moments like these were hard to come by, and I tried to hold onto them when they did.

“How’s everything? School okay?”

“Uh…” I hesitated. The image of Megan Wood and Brian Powell hit me like the punch he had given me earlier that week, but I tried to play it off. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Nothing much.”

“Hm…”

She shifted a bit on the bed and began rummaging through some stuff in the nightstand drawer, where I kept nothing worth worrying about — crumpled papers, keychains without keys, loose coins, old candy, and condoms she’d given me but I’d never used. Victoria twirled a keychain on her finger, as if deciding whether it was worth continuing the conversation.

“What about you, Vic? How’s life out there?” I asked, unsure what to say. Her life seemed like a world apart from what went on at school.

“Eh, it’s alright…” She shrugged and glanced out the window. “There are some weird guys, but nothing I’m not used to…” Her gaze wandered for a moment, and the silence between us grew heavy.

“Vic,” I said, and she looked at me sideways, a curious expression on her face. “The other day… I saw you near the market, with that guy. Blip.”

Her reaction was instant. She froze for a moment but quickly recovered, forcing a smile.

“Blip? What are you talking about?”

“I know it was him, Vic,” I said, turning in my chair to face her directly. “Is he still around? Did you talk to him again?”

“No.” The response came quickly, almost defensive. “Look, he doesn’t deal anymore. He’s clean. And so am I, before you ask. You know that.”

“Are you sure?” My voice came out rougher than intended, but I couldn’t help it. “He’s not exactly the kind of person who just shows up for a chat, Vic. You don’t have to—”

“I’m not doing anything wrong, Big Boy,” she interrupted, now serious. “He showed up, we exchanged a few words, and that was it. End of story. I’m not going back to that, okay? It’s over.”

I wanted to believe her. I should believe her. But the weight of our past was hard to ignore. I leaned back in my chair, trying to soften my tone.

“I just don’t want you to get in trouble again,” I said. “You’ve been through so much, Vic. We both have. And now that you’re better…”

“I am better,” she repeated, more gently this time.

She sat on the edge of the bed, a small smile playing on her lips, but there was something in her eyes that made me uneasy.

“I know you want to look out for me, Big Boy, and I love that about you. But relax, okay? I’m fine. We’re fine.”

I nodded lightly, but the feeling of discomfort remained, like a shadow lingering in the corner of the room.

“Oh, did you manage to sort out that thing from yesterday?” she asked, almost absentmindedly after a moment of silence.

“What thing?” I said, pushing my chair back toward the computer.

I felt Victoria’s gaze on the back of my head.

“Weren’t you in my room yesterday looking for a phone charger? You said you lost yours or something…”

“In your room…?” I blinked, confused. “Oh!” I tried to laugh, but the sound came out forced. “Yeah, the charger. I forgot to tell you I found it after…”

She hesitated for a moment, then sighed.

“Alright, then, Big Boy… if you need anything, just ask.”

I nodded, keeping a smile as she stood up, pulling her phone from her pocket, signaling the end of the conversation. Before leaving, she cast one last look at me, a mix of affection and exasperation.

“Take care of yourself too, okay?” She winked. “We don’t need anyone else getting hurt in this house.”

And she left, leaving behind a silence louder than anything she’d said. I turned to the computer, but the game no longer seemed appealing. An unease crept over me, my heart racing, and my mind spun wildly.

I didn’t remember going to her room. Or saying anything about a charger.

My fingers tapped lightly against my leg as I stared at the computer screen, seeing nothing. It didn’t make sense. Another blank space in my memory. Again.

It must be exhaustion, I thought.

It’s always exhaustion.