The Hero’s Stain - part 2

Sarah always thought that the day something bad would happen would feel strange from the moment she woke up. She thought she’d be able to predict it, sense somehow that things would be off, that there would be an inexplicable weight on her shoulders keeping her on edge until the bad thing happened and she could finally say, "so that’s it". But she found out, still at seventeen, that bad days that turn your life upside down can start just like any other day.

The night began as quietly as the morning. The ride home on the school bus was exhausting, with some students still wanting to ask questions about the fundraising even after the meeting she had held to explain everything. Despite everything, the reception of the bad news had been positive, mainly because Sarah had already come up with ideas to solve the problems.

Being in a leadership position wasn’t easy. Often, she had to overlook close friendships to be fair to the interests that would benefit most of the student body, which sometimes caused clashes even with childhood friends. But that didn’t make Sarah falter; in the end, she could always talk and make herself understood in her position on the student council.

“I’m home,” Sarah announced as she walked through the living room, already smelling the dinner her mom was cooking.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Louisa said. “I’m taking advantage of Elijah’s nap to get dinner ready.”

“Need help?” Sarah dropped her backpack on a chair and approached her mother.

“Can you help me stir the sauce until it thickens?” Her mother asked, handing her the spoon before sliding over to the sink, breathing deeply and massaging her chest, her brows furrowed.

“Are you okay, Mom?”

“Yes, I… I’m just feeling a little anxious, don’t know why,” she replied honestly. She was about to say more, but was interrupted by the phone ringing in the living room. “Must be your aunt again…”

Sarah stirred the sauce as it began to bubble, large red bubbles swelling and bursting on the surface, splattering the stove and her t-shirt. The wooden spoon moved clockwise, steadily and slowly.

Then it happened.

A tearful scream, a thud.

Sarah left the pan and ran to where her mother was, finding her curled up, kneeling on the floor, the phone pressed to her ear. Her green, tear-filled eyes wandered around the room without seeing anything, Sarah knew as she approached her.

“Mom?” She touched her shoulder gently.

“Yes, I… I’ll…” she whispered to the person still talking on the other end of the line. “Thank you,” the cordless phone slipped from her loose hand to the gray carpet.

“Mom, what happened?!”

Louisa finally looked at her daughter. Tears streamed down her cheeks and her trembling lips struggled to say something before Sarah’s mouth dried up and her heart pounded so hard she could hear it in her chest, just from the fear her mother’s expression caused her.

“Sarah, your… your… dad…”

“No,” her eyes burned and the knot in her throat couldn’t stop the scream. “NO!”

Louisa pulled her daughter into a hug, seeking support for both Sarah and herself. Kneeling on the carpet, they sobbed and cried out in desperation, in complete denial and yet understanding everything.

The smell of burnt sauce and the smoke coming from the kitchen didn’t matter. Elijah’s loud cries waking up scared from his nap in the midst of the commotion were the only thing that could get Louisa off the floor, staggering to pick him up.

Sarah remained where she was, numb. Her mother hadn’t uttered the words, but she knew the moment she saw her in that state.

Her father was dead.

****

“Lou, I know this may not be the best time, but due to the ongoing investigation, we need to ask some questions…”

“What do you mean?” Louisa gasped. “What investigation, Alec?”

“What do you mean, Captain?” Sarah, accompanying her mother at the police station, interjected.

The large, burly Captain Alec Caldwell looked at the girl like one would look at a lost puppy. He was an old family friend, having attended their home for years, joining parties and barbecues on the porch, and his daughter had attended the same school as Sarah until she graduated the previous year. At this point, he was more than just her father’s boss; he was a beloved friend.

“Sarah, sweetie, why don’t you go get a snack in the canteen? I need to talk to your mom, it’s an adult matter…”

“No, she stays,” her mother put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close like a mother goose tucking her gosling under her wing.

“Very well,” the captain tugged at his belt over his protruding belly before sitting in his wide chair behind the desk cluttered with papers. “I think I owe you the details of what happened to Samuel.”

A week before, Sarah had seen her father — her hero — inside a coffin wrapped in the American flag and lowered into the ground. The details of what had happened weren’t disclosed; all they knew was that things had gone wrong during an operation to arrest heroin traffickers.

“Well… we’ve known each other long enough for you to know I’m not one to beat around the bush… nor am I very delicate with words,” Alec said, and Louisa nodded, grim.

“Go ahead, Alec.”

The man sighed loudly, fiddling with a golden pen between his calloused fingers.

“There was an ongoing investigation — still is,” he began, “we were working on a tip about police officers involved in a corruption scheme,” he seemed to wait for either of the two in front of him to say something or change expressions, but when they didn’t, he continued. “Last week’s incident… well, it confirmed what we feared.”

“What do you mean?” Sarah broke the silence that had settled in the cramped room. “What did you fear?”

“Sarah, dear… Lou… Samuel was involved. He was one of the corrupt ones.”

“WHAT?!” Louisa stood so fast the chair toppled over. “MY HUSBAND WAS NOT A CRIMINAL!”

“Lou, calm down…” The man requested patiently.

“Stop it! You…” The woman brought her hands to her face.

“Mom…” Sarah, holding back tears, tried to hold her mother, who struggled like Elijah did when he was sleepy.

“You’re not going to tarnish my husband’s reputation like this, Alec!” She warned, pointing a finger at the chubby captain. “Samuel was the most honest man I ever knew!”

“Good people can be driven to do unthinkable things for various reasons, my friend,” Caldwell said.

“Not my Sam…” Louisa sobbed, her voice hoarse and broken. “Not my Sam…”

“Calm down…” The tall figure of the policeman wrapped mother and daughter in a hug, his large hands caressing their heads. “It’s okay…”

****

“I don’t think I can do this yet,” her mother dropped the white shirt on the floor, the scent of her father still too strong for her to sort through his things without feeling overwhelmed by the tears that insisted on falling. “It’s too soon…”

She then left the room, leaving Sarah alone in the bedroom that had been empty for weeks — Louisa couldn’t bear the thought of lying in that bed knowing her husband would never warm it again. She spent her nights — as it was hard to say she actually slept — in Elijah’s room or even on the couch with the TV for company.

Quietly, Sarah bent down to pick up the neatly pressed shirt — she remembered seeing him wear it so many times. She walked to the open wardrobe door, hanging the shirt back on the hanger, then lightly brushing her hand over the exposed sleeves of the other shirts, the scent so present and so… sad. The knot in her chest untied in her eyes as she looked at one of his uniforms, just like the one he wore when…

Sarah refused to believe it.

It wasn’t possible that her own father, a man whose ethics were recognized by everyone he knew, was the kind of guy who stole money and resold seized weapons and drugs while on duty during police raids. That stain on his image was almost as painful as his absence every day.

She continued rummaging through the clothes in the wardrobe, finding at the back that horrible, huge, heavy, checkered coat with the dirty sheepskin lining that Sarah always teased him about. Laughing a little through her tears, she pulled it off the hanger and hugged it as if she could hug her father that way.

She slipped her arms into the huge sleeves and wore the coat that fit her more like a blanket, falling almost to her calves. It was really warm and soft; she understood now why her father liked it so much on the coldest winter days.

“Okay, Dad, I admit that—” she began to speak as if talking to her father, stopping when she felt an object in the pocket of the coat. “What’s this?”

Sarah pulled out an old, small cell phone that was probably almost as old as she was. Frowning, she looked for how to turn it on, wondering why her father had — hid — a device like that in the back of his wardrobe.

Still with some battery, she managed to browse what was on the phone. Very few received calls and even fewer made. No saved contacts.

One text message, dated the day before his death.

stop what you’re doing or sarah and elijah will suffer

“What?!”

Falling back onto the bed, Sarah read and reread the message, slowly absorbing that it was a threat. The day before he died, her father had received a threat that she and her brother would suffer.

What did that mean? Who had sent it?

Trembling, Sarah looked at the sender’s number and did the only thing she could: she grabbed her own phone and dialed it.

It probably wouldn’t amount to anything. It was probably from a disposable phone like that one, likely not even on.

But it was on. And after six rings, there was an answer.

“Hello?”

Sarah froze.

That voice.

She knew that voice.

“Hello? Anyone there?”

She could almost see him scratching his belly on the other end, playing with the golden pen between his fingers.

That deep, very familiar voice belonged to Captain Alec Caldwell.