No Diet November 2025 - 6

Chat, there is no reason for these blatant accusations! Still, keep those questions and comments coming! Anyways, here is a recipe for a decadent fried butter explosion!

Mega Fried Butter Bliss: The Calorie Nuke

These golden nuggets of pure butter bliss get battered, fried crisp, and drowned in sinful toppings that would make even the most industrious piggy blush. One serving will make your jeans weep.

Yield: 1 serving, Calories: ~9,725 (diet's worst nightmare)
Prep: 15 min Cook: 10 min Total: 25 min

Ingredients

Butter Nuggets:

• 1 lb (4 sticks) unsalted butter, cubed into 8-10 chunks

Batter Blitz:

• 2 cups flour

• 1 cup sugar

• 4 eggs, beaten into submission

• 1 cup heavy cream

Fry & Finish:

• 2-3 cups of your favorite frying oil

• 1 cup powdered sugar

Topping Torrent:

• ½ cup warm chocolate syrup

• ¼ cup maple syrup

• ½ cup chopped toasted pecans

• 1 pint vanilla ice cream

Instructions

1. Cube the Nuggets: Chill and slice butter into fat cubes. Put them on parchment paper and back in the fridge to keep cold and firm. You may find even better success popping them in the freezer for a deeper chill.

2. Mix the Batter: Whisk flour, sugar, eggs, and cream into a thick, sticky batter. It'll hug those cubes like your jeans after a serving.

3. Fry Frenzy: Heat oil to 350°F in a deep pan till it snarls. Dip chilled cubes in batter, completely coat, and fry 2-3 min per side till golden and crispy. Drain on rack or paper towels.

4. More sugar!: Gently toss the hot nuggets in powdered sugar until completely covered. Watch it melt into sticky glory.

5. Stack the Sin: Pile nuggets in a bowl. Drench with chocolate and maple syrups, sprinkle candied pecans and chunky sea salt, serve with melting ice cream.

6. Devour: Eat the artery clogging dessert you pig. Drink the rest of the heavy cream for more calories too, we know you were going to do it anyways.

Pro Tips:

• Stretchy pants mandatory.