A VERY HONEY HEIST CHRISTMAS

PHYSICAL PATRONS: Thank you for your kind ongoing contributions. I'll be sending out the next batch of paper copies in January.

It's Christmas! Chiz chiz, jolly et cetera.

Can I share a secret with you? I'm not very good at Christmas. I don't like it much. I'm fine with the feasting part, and I'm always happy to receive free gifts, but every other element just rubs me up the wrong way.

Is that in part due to The Depression? Undoubtedly. As a man who's retreated further and further into a hermit-like existence over the last couple of years, Christmas is far too social a holiday for me to enjoy it properly.

BUT. I am fascinated by the shape of Christmas, the cultural weirdness of it, and how it's a) drifted far away from the original Christian themes* and b) resulted in a hyper-specific traditions held by each family. (For example: my partner's family doesn't open all their presents at once. What the fuck is that about? A sort of festive edging? Back in my day, we opened all of our presents at midnight on Christmas Eve and then slept in until 10am.)

And! I'm fascinated by the idea of Christmas specials, too. I ran a Honey Heist Christmas Special game for Rusty Quill many years ago - six, I think? Five? That pandemic really muddied the waters with regards to my perception of linear time - and we had a lovely time with it. It became kind of a running joke that I would crowbar in Actual Jesus to every single holiday special I did with them, because I find something inherently funny about the contrast between:

• Candy canes, mulled wine, jolly little robins, paper hats, indoor trees, etc and

• The conception and birth of an unknowable half-god from beyond space and time

SO - if you want to run your very own Holiday Special game of Honey Heist, complete with potential Actual Jesus, here are the tools to do it. Plus it's got a drawing of a bear on it that reflects the eight years of practice I've had since the last time I tried to draw a bear; I think you'll agree I've come along a bit since then.

Merry Christmas, if you celebrate. And not if you don't! Okay.

Yours,

• Grant "Jolly Holiday" Howitt

*Yeah, yeah. Pagan holiday. Midwinter feast. Yer lad Jesus wasn't even born in December. I know. Come back to me when it's not named after one of the three biggest facets of the Lord God and we'll talk.