YKS The Mag #24

Tactika Headwear - “A New Product for the New Normal”

“These days, masks have become a necessary part of daily life. But let's face it – they all have a number of serious problems. They suffocate, pinch, muffle, crimp our style, and hide our smiles. And wearing glasses with masks compounds the problem, with fogging making us unable to see!”

These fellers went and made a pair of eye glasses what  snaps onto your mask, and vice versey.. What’ll they think of next? I’m serious what do you think they will invent next?? I wanna know! They're just using cloth filters so I guess the draw here is the anti-fog, and the fact you can take it off and put it back on (which, okay isn’t the fuckin point of this entire shit that you’re supposed to have your shit covered at all times? Is the virus looking away and you’re waiting until its head is turned or some shit? What’s with these fuckin inventions where you pull a string and your mask opens up so you can eat your 16.00 reuben. Fuck you go home!

“With this in mind, we chose reusable, washable cloth filters for Tactika’s mask. Not only do natural cloth filters have many performance advantages over synthetic materials, but also they greatly reduce the amount of waste during their reusable life and as they biodegrade when eventually disposed of.”

Cool Cat Fights Coronavirus - In “COOL CAT FIGHTS CORONAVIRUS”, COOL CAT tells kids to wear the mask and be safe, but DIRTY DOG thinks Coronavirus is a Scam!

“Hello Cool Cat Fans, after numerous requests to do a Cool Cat Coronavirus film, I searched the internet and could not find a kid’s Coronavirus themed film out there, which I found extremely surprising, but also found extremely exciting!”

Derek Savage’s whole shit sounds so exhausting but god bless the man for being passionate about something. Cool Cat Fights Coronavirus is another installment in the storied Cool Cat series of films that started with 2012’s Cool Cat in the Hollywood Parade, a film where Cool Cat’s wife (Paula Poundstone) is hit by a car repeatedly. Just kidding about that part. Its about him going to a parade or something. Anyway it sucks.

“1- The film introduces Cool Cat’s new archenemy, Dirty Dog, to the Cool Cat Universe. And Dirty Dog is one mean Dog! Howl!!!!

2- It shows both sides of the Coronavirus issue. Cool Cat tells kids to wear the mask and be safe with CDC guidelines, but Dirty Dog thinks coronavirus is a Scam and humans are sheep for wearing mask!

3- It helps to setup for our next Movie, “Cool Cat Stops a School Shooting”, which we need to attract a Studio or an Investor to bring this Feature Film to life.”

Anytongs - Instantly Turn Your Flatware Into Kitchen Tongs

“Anytongs instantly turns your flatware into versatile kitchen tongs. Why have multiple clunky tongs when you can simply use the forks and spoons you already have? Go ahead and turn those hearty meats, stir some noodles, and serve that delicious salad. You’ll always have tongs ready when you need them with Anytongs.”

This is one of those ones what sounds like we made it up. Attaching your forks to a pair of gripper things and making new tongs. Jesse is like ohh yeah I have multiple tongs. Is this useful? Do you think I missed the mark? Keep in mind I can see who agree's and disagrees with me on these posts, and I am not afraid to swing the ban hammer if I detect anything less than complete and total loyalty.

Maybe this isn’t great for single dads who have one set of forks because you’re gonna be using up forks all night long! Unless you’re taking the forks off the thing in between. Then its like, what are we even doing. What’s the fuckin point of all this! I would just walk out of my house if this happened to me. Just keep on walking.

Weighted Sleeper: You hug it. You Sleep better - Luxurious weighted sleep pillow you hold. Irish. Sustainably made. For a refreshing sleep.

Yes this thing looks like a big worm (Friday) but maybe you’d like sleeping with one of these logs between your legs. My shit is all pillowed up. My shit is looking nice. I slept with a weighted blanket for awhile and, I’ll tell ya… I didn’t notice a difference, gang. What was I supposed to have noticed anyway? That I got a big heavy ass blanket on me? Yeah! I think I could tell! Next!

Movie Movie Game - The ultimate board game for entertainment lovers looking to frustrate and befuddle their friends

Didn’t understand this one due to my IQ being too low (still unclear) but Jesse said its from Jeopardy and a reader left a vm saying it was actually from Wheel of Fortune. Nice try Jesse, maybe next time try being less stupid. You are one pathetic moron.

db! db! db!

Memloc - A tool and a method to remember what truly matters!

“With Memloc, you can! Memloc will ensure you remember what you want, as you build your memories one by one. By associating personal and emotional elements to information, you will soon see huge improvements in your school, work and daily life.”

I would probably love this shit, if it worked! I have a dog shit memory. I will tell someone the same story like eight times. No idea why this happens to me. Guess I’m just god’s cursed man. :(