Ep. 217 Premium - 'fake' sports [AUDIO]

You have to consider that a lot of would be amazing athletes dont get the chance because they have to work 2 jobs to live in america on top of if their community has the resources to build the fields, have teams, coaches, and compete. Also the two main american sports basketball and football are basically size gated so kid who get scammed by growth spurts dont get as much of a chance. Like unironically if we had a baskball league where the average height of players on the field has to be 5’10” we’d see athleticism that make the current pros look mid

The fucking jack black and kage bit is unbeatable. I laughed my ass for until I almost puked. Kage he's throwing a knuckleball

Using a footpedal to play runescape by clicking the same spot is not new tech, it's been know since 2007 haha

Not saying wishing death on anybody is cool, but overall minus the death threats, I'd say Pirate Software is reasonably hated. He is just a fraud when it comes to so many things. He portrays himself as an expert but doesn't know shit.

PIERCE THE VEIL MENTIONED

They keep talking about sports they know nothing about, lmao

Just in terms of money/profit, the US sports teams Majorly control the top 50 sports teams net worth. Soccer has seen a major decrease in value compared to the NFL or MLB (NBA is getting there).

Great to see everyone universally agreeing Ludwig's take on football is dog. American soccer is decades behind the rest of the world and it would take so long to catch up, and would require them to completely change the way football works from the ground up in their country. And even of they did the incentive is still there in the USA for the best athletes to go into american football, baseball, or basketball because of all the money in it domestically

Reminds me of a few years ago when lud thought esfan could kick a ball well in kickball cause of his strength.

I was not expecting chrogman being mentioned

I feel if you were to have an Australian coach scout American athletes, to build the perfect AFL team. Then that team was trained for one year with no Australian intervention, it would lose to Geelong. Most of the players have been nurtured from a very young age to be the best AFL player and I don't think any country could compete with less then 5 years of building an institution.

As a whole, Ludwig is correct in the physicality, Americans are by far consistently the most agility and physicality based in soccer but then the skill and tech difference is so insane. It's why old heads from Europe and central america can come to the us league after because they have such a gap in skill that their lesser physical ability just doesn't matter

I feel like Title IX in college makes it harder for there to be professional soccer/futball in the US

Yo Aiden! Watch the Jim Wamsley docs. His western states races are legendary

"Is there breaking news in lolcow esports" might be the funniest thing slime has said

I remember a video of Jack Black talking about doing Kung Fu Panda promos in China even though he doesn’t do the voice in Chinese. Somehow he was still a draw to the movie

Ludwig is smoking the fucking crack man. Just like in America they almost always release movies in the original language with subtitles well before the dubbing comes out. My girlfriend is from China and knows Jack black BECAUSE of kung fu panda.

banger ep

As a balding blond boy from the Netherlands, ludwig doesnt know frick about football (💩 soccer). Usa doesnt have the infrastructure, well said aiden

I think the main economic barrier to sports is not equipment, it's almost definitely Access to food, then optimal macros. You need to be somewhere where there's no war and little violence, famously the US has these qualities unlike lots of Africa.

Aimen talking about a cricket score being 505 to 7 is so funny man, none of our boys know anything about other countries.

For the love of God, stop talking about soccer in the podcast.

The volume difference between the end of this episode and D&D is diabolical. -_-

Yes Ludwig the world series is 6 games I believe that you're a real baseball fan now and it's not just ohtani

lotta hate comments this week

ludwig and nick being confidently wrong as per usual

Ludwig butchering Christian Pulusic gave me literal pain

God tests you by having the yard discuss something you have knowledge about

the Shohei argument is so braindead, Ludwig forgets that like the average person literally does not watch baseball, and if they do they only know players for the team they watch. I’m Canadian, so while it’s fair to say it’s not an “america-centric” take, he’s very unknown outside of America/Japan. I asked the two biggest canadian baseball fans I know if they knew ANY dodgers players, and neither knew a single player, but could name almost the entire Leafs lineup. I don’t think people generally “know” players unless they’re a deeply invested fan, whereas anyone who has seen a single Jack Black movie would know him. I also think it’s an overwhelming common sentiment among Yard listeners who are not explicitly from LA to have learned about him entirely from Ludwig and this podcast.

Ludwig calling Tyreek Hill the fastest player in the NFL in 2025 proves he really doesn’t know ball

I'd argue baseball "americas pastime" is way more mickey mouse than any sport they mentioned here. And the americans aren't even the best at this sport. Actually fuck this conversation

No ludwig is pissing me off with this soccer shit

By slimes logic I've given him enough money I can call him a bald bitch and tell him to kill himself without being blocked or banned

Jack Black is so uber famous it's not even close, this discussion boils my blood to no end. More people know Nacho Libre than Shohei

I think hearing slime argue that playing street fighter for 8 hours a day which requires no scheduling, coordination with other people, or real social interaction at all might be my reason for ending the patreon subscription. Its actually insane to think thats harder than running a company of any size

Pulisic left Chelsea like 3 years ago lmao

"Pitch of Destiny" that quick was so funny. Also Ludwig is really underestimating Jack Black. Nacho Libre, Tropic Thunder, Jumanji, Minecraft, and Panda. Any 31+ year old knows his old comedy movies too. (Comedy Central played them alllll the time). He's been around so long.

Holy shit shut the fuck up about AFL so just wrong players who mark the ball (catch off someone’s kick) can’t be tackled only IF THE BALL went more than 15 metres. If they just tried to kick the ball around for the 4 20+min quarters they would fail and get fucked up. Also it’s contact so players would just hit them so fucking hard they can’t get up whilst contesting the ball. AFL players are some of Australia’s best athletes so interceptions and contested marks is very common. Nick being so confidently wrong literally broke me I never comment on shit but bro you are just wrong. Bout to bully beat down nicks ass for his take

Couple of insane takes in this one, the USA suck at the Olympics if you look at per capita, so I’d say no there not genetic freaks and also no American dominates in the AFL, Mason Cox is only one who comes close he is a middling player who only gets game time because he is 210 cms tall.

AFL players don’t just pass indefinitely because percentage you win by matters on the ladder not just because of some gentlemen’s agreement. + it would be hard to just continuously pass around without being intercepted.

ludwig is soooooooo wrong what

Ludwig gotta hop off shoheis cock and nutts, mf is mentioned every ep, jack black is 5x more famous

stingray bite ??

Slime would tell Weah to kill himself after the red card if he cared about football

A comment on ultra marathoning: although I have a lot of respect for the competitors, to pursue training requires near unlimited time which means you are either an influencer or rich, which eliminates a lot of people from the pool. There also is a lot less prize money in ultra marathoning than more traditional distance running which means fewer pros.

To any of the yard boys reading this, watch the Juventus vs Dortmund Champions League game highlights. Absolute cinema, youll really enjoy that.

As someone who is 30 and plays soccer against college age Kenya guys all the time i can assure you they can run for forever. Even the professors at the uni. 55, Kenyan, can run for forever

Bully beatdown for online games is a fire idea, but the logistics seem tough. You'd inevitably get a bunch of lunatics trying to stream snjpe you to be toxic for attention and potentially monetary gain.

I stopped doing this because it felt too mean, but the ultimate card to play on a toxic teammate is "Why are you playing alone right now? You don't have friends who want to play games with you? I can see why"

With modern training methods and nutrition Don Bradman is still the goat cricket batsmen. His batting average is 50% higher than the next best, over a 20-year international career, he was just that dominant. His stats will never be touched.

The argument around soccer is ridiculous because there’s a kind of soccer the U.S. cares about as much as the rest of the world - women’s soccer - and we are indisputably the best at it.

Crazy that Lud doesn't seem to understand that America does well in sports because of its economic and cultural emphasis on specific sports. And not because Americans are just more athletic.

I live in Baltimore, the way mark Andrew’s was bashed was insane

people weren't hard enough on PS

Who’s more famous? The pope or jack black?

Im not an american, but lud is so wrong regarding soccer being mickey mouse. Just so you know today’s american squad is actually higher skilled compared to the wc squad for USA in 2010 but the skill gap between USA and other nations is too much for the US mens team to make a dent in the international scene. But more talents are playing overseas nowadays which is a step in the right direction. America fuck up because they were too late to the academy/scouting system of say England for example too many kids in US need some pretty wealthy parents to pay for them to play organised matches to get noticed. Btw pulisic is playing for ac milan in italy nowadays.

Nick and Slime are like one step removed from being Sports Ball guys

Pierce the veil mentioned

I would love to see some videos of Aiden just dunking on people in chat

no pirate software fucking sucks and its a lot more than just WoW lmao

Jack Black is more famous. More people have watched Kung Fu Panda, Tropic Thunder, School of Rock, Minecraft Movie than have watched Shohei Otani

wahoo!

Oh boy I wonder if they’ll talk about it