April Release Overview - April Fools Joke
WARGAMES ARE DEAD, LONG LIVE RACING GAMES!
Hello everyone,
Today we are happy to announce that we have finally listened to all of your feedback, and we are officially switching away from wargaming miniatues, into a new era of racing miniatures!
We've seen your comments and complaints about the poor quality of our models, the terrible art direction, and of course that we're not providing enough value for the money. You are absolutely right, our wargaming models suck, so we're throwing them all into the trash (where they belong).
After long deliberation, we've decided that since our wargaming models are so bad, we're going to switch to a new type of miniatures, made for racing games. :D
In the coming years, you can expect us to release 1 high fidelity racing model every month, inviting you into the heart-pounding world of miniature racing, the tears of split-second pit stop tire changes, and of course the drama of the inter-personal relationships of the racing pilots.
To give everyone a taste of this new direction, we have decided to give out this month's miniature for free, so that the world can enjoy it. That's right, with this new amazing deal you now get $0+ worth of content for just $10!
Grab the model for free by CLICKING HERE!
THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING US!
EVERYTHING YOU GET THIS MONTH
3D Print Rewards (1 model):
Ratmen - Racer Trio x1
3D Print Welcome Pack:
Dispensable
2D Print Rewards:
Superfluous
Early Access Rewards:
Redundant
Full Rulebook Rewards:
Unneeded
General Rewards:
Inessential
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TERMS & CONDITIONS
All of the provided files remain the property of onepagerules; by becoming a patron, you are given a license only for your personal use of these files.
You may not sell, share, distribute, rent, transfer, copy, reproduce or republish the files in any way. You may also not sell, share, distribute, rent or transfer the prints that you make in any way, and you may not re-cast the prints either.
You may resize or cut the contents of the files for personal use, but you may not sell, share, distribute, rent, transfer, copy, reproduce or republish the result in any way. You may also not otherwise modify, duplicate, create derivative works of, disassemble, reverse compile or reverse engineer the files in any way.
Comments (114)
Noooooo.... did I miss it? Oh wait... this is last year's? Daaaamn... I want a ratman racer...
One page rules gorka morka? Or gaslands? Sign me up! XD
Lol why'd patreon send me this update today? I'm happy they did, but odd hahaha
This "joke" was actually a great idea. There's tabletop football that uses fantasy-type creatures. probably soccer and baseball too. Why not racing. Video games do it, I don't see why tabletop games couldn't. There's gaslands which could probably be classified as a sci-fi racing game. no reason another could be created.
I saw Gaslands and it seemed way overly complex. I'd love to hear what you thought of my racing game rules. I gave these rules to OPR and tried to make them loosely in the OPR format to begin with. I think that anyone probably over 8 could pretty easily follow this, and I think it might make an awesome gateway to the hobby.
So, I built a core set of Grimdark and Fantasy Racing rules that is only One Page (Just one actually, no front and back.) and it really focuses on simplicity. NASCAR vs F1? NASCAR. Every car is the same... Same speed and agility maximums, (They total up to 12), same weapons / effects, etc... Each turn you privately pick your 'speed' 1-12, and the rest is your agility for the turn. This is your tactical steering wheel, as each point of agility lets you turn by up to 10 degrees, but you have to move your full move you selected. From there, everything is resolved in one roll of 1D6 each player, and it can work with several players, not just 2. I asked OPR for an email to send to them, as I intend to give this to them freely, but until that happens, anyone can have this ruleset as I put it here: https://jeeveswifi.com/GrimdarkFantasyRacing.pdf Comment if you like it!
I would love 3 or 5 version per Faction and than use it for Gaslands or an edited version of those rules. OPR-Fantasy Racing
I have to echo the sentiment that I live in a world with Blood Bowl, so "Age of Fantasy Motorsports" would fit right in. The Skirmish equivalent would be a Age of Equestrian Competition game.
Like the GW2 mount races :-) Awesome!
Yeah that was funny and all , but I really want this mini.
... At least for now (unless/until they take it off of google drive), you CAN have that mini. Just click the link!
kinda want a Kart racer game now....
Pretty plz do a real cart racing game 🥺❤️ this is something I could get my mom and my partner to play!
I put one up at: https://jeeveswifi.com/GrimdarkFantasyRacing.pdf and gave this to the OPR team. What you mention is exactly why I was thinking this would be fun too!
Perspective 1 - LOL Perspective 2? - Dang... Now I'm gonna be up all night crafting an OPR simple tabletop racing game... It is actually a pretty good way to involve the youngsters. Imagine you draw out a track on your tabletop. 4 LAPS, no more, no less... Weapons lay effects on the track either where you are, behind you, or ahead of you. Your moves can be picked by setting your speed in the next round on a card that is face down. 12 speed you can not turn... 6 speed and you could make a 60 degree turn during your 6" move. 20,40,60,80 degree turn and a number of inches forward... Speed plus Agility = 12 (A speed 6 agility 6 vehicle could move 6 and agile enough to turn up to 60 degrees...) Each weapon could: * CCW --> If close enough on your turn to hit, Roll a D6 they take one wound, and you knock them that many inches away from you. * Ranged Weapons --> Will allow you to place a 6" round template onto the track within range. Run over the template, and take a wound... * Each contestant gets 3 wounds... Take all three and you wreck and lost the race. No killing. No really bad stuff beyond a mario kart type of thing, but I can see a couple kids having a blast on a tabletop game as a result. 10/10 April Fool's Scale... :-)
Minimum speed "4" (As that leaves 8 for the 80 degree turn). Roll-off for initiative each turn AFTER their move number is set for this turn, but BEFORE they actually move... (so this allows both players to do "attacks" with genuine element of surprise). I can see this being actually fun.
Totaly up for more racers! I'll pit them against the Duchy steam ostriches and boars and the sisters bikes. We got ourselves one epic whacky race! Also what an amazing sculpt for the sole purpose of an april's fool! You guys rock!
Yup. totally got me with that.
Scientifically accurate too! Turns out rats enjoy driving! https://arstechnica.com/science/2019/11/these-rats-learned-to-drive-tiny-cars-for-science/
You say April fools joke, I say Fantasy GorkaMorka.
I really hope, racing minis will be a thing until the point you release a rules set, it will be awesome
Can we get more of these, please.
Would love this running over a nurgle
Jokes on you I’m into this.
Genuinely laughed out loud... the clown bicycle posture is amazing!
im feeling more about .. Kart Raging... 🤪.... just hope we will have the jackall one release soon... so just shut up take my money and give me more....magnetized time is over. says welcome to the spring laucher time....
Love the wacky races rat ogre :D
GW has bloodbowl, OPR has Cart Racing! I like it! I need more death roller for other factions :D
This April 1st joke is so going to blow up in their face as we all demand a Mario Cart style game with customizable racers for every race. Better get onto it OPR :)
I could get into a Death Race 2000 style racing game or a demolition derby free for all.
Like Andre The Giant on a Big Wheel. OPR Kart, I love it.
I love these so much, you teasing bastards....
I think OPR accidentally made something people are going to ask them to do 😂
Please! Rules for this Bad Rat Roller. The top tiny rat commander just makes this perfect:)
I hope they have more factions in this! I want to have some Gaslands fun with these.
Give me some bananas and tortoise shells, and I'm in!
I'll be really disappointed if this joke ends and there isn't an orc go-kart released. I would absolutely play them.
I high-key kinda do want some racing models now for Mario Kart style shenanigans 😂
I was looking into some combat racing games just a couple months ago. I'm sure the rules for this will be ten times as good as the rules for the war games.
I know this is this years April fools joke but I'm not gonna lie. Now I'd love for you guys to write a version of gaslands and to produce 1 model a month for that game.
The real April Fools is when you realize this is actually amazing. Glad I downloaded Wasteland Racing before the one offs got removed.
Love your take on the Rat rod :)
Haha I love it great job opr
Really looking forward to the other racers :D But seriously, please include rules for this guy :)
OPR, you broke my heart.
I dunno, you say it's a "joke" but I would use these as alternate Cavalry or as a Hero unit...
I really hope that stats get added for this to AoF for a mounted unit. Also fantasy racing game would be amazing.
I'm using this for Kings of War!
i have no idea what's going on in those pics - BUT I LOVE IT!
OPR, youve awakened something in me, fantasy kart miniatures game brawler, IF YOU DONT MAKE THIS I WILL
Pretty good ;-)
In seriousness, Heat Petal to the Metal is a hot game right now and unavailable. Making minis that could be used in Heat but themed for dark fantasy with some cool print and glue track designs… Would be awesome! :)
The perfect new piece to dominate in Gaslands: Refueled ;)
About time you listened to my feedback! It only took until April First! :)
Same, Age of Fantasy: The Rat Race! Develop this for real.
Have to agree with everyone. I know this is a joke but I'd be down for a fantasy cart race game.
Please tell me this is real and not April fools, because that is some flex right there?! I will take that rat off there and rehash it for battle sisters just for fun!
This is one of those jokes that you kind of wish was true
Been thinking about GorkkaMorkka recently and honestly wouldn't mind more bikes, trucks, and some Mad Max "Witness Me!" -style vehicle combat rules. But yeah, its April :)
And me looking at the renders without reading the post: Cool a deathroller. But it looks a bit like a go kart, strange design choice.. *facepalm*
You've created a monster. Now you're going to actually have to go and finish making us a racing game and expand your cart lineup!
Cool April fools prank. Now, please brush off the old Wasteland Racing ruleset and actually make a fantasy racing game.
Finally!
Would play and not ashamed.
Please tell me the link is really the rat cart
It is :)
This is one of those jokes that accidentally are just good idea!
yea opr cart racing isn't a bad idea honestly. the factions are already there, and you could fit the rules on one page. have gaslands type theme and a track.
This is absolutely ridiculous. I was expecting amorphous blobs when I made this request. Not these wonderfully highly detailed sewer rats with lots of great details I have to paint!
That being said it actually is a really cool idea. I would actually love to see a battling cart style game.
Honestly I'd play it
If this doesn't become a reality I will be very disappointed
I actually wouldn't mind a racing or car combat ruleset in the future
I wouldn't be mad at a fantasy-themed, tounge-in-cheek Gaslands, tbh
At last! A sound business choice! 👍🏼😂😉
Well, I got hyped by a joke, thank you very much. I think it would be funny to have a kart for every faction, maybe every 3-4 months, for a Mario Kart kind of game. It would be luvely
This! I'd love to have one for each faction, just as a fun paint project/collectible whether an actual game for them materializes or not.
This, this is what was missing in my life. Need more. Please. Give us more!
I hate April fools day lol
I know this is a joke but now I want more racers. OPR-Cart time.
Side note: there is, or at least was, a One-Shot Racing Game on the OPR website that these could work for, so it's not as crazy of an idea as they make it out to be. I'd play a FF or GDF Mario Cart crossover game for sure
I'll help develop a racing game! Who's in with me?
This is what I’ve been waiting for ❤️🥰
Phew! It's about time OPR. Out with the old and in with the new 😉
You jest, but printing up a few of those to field in their own rat-race using Gaslands rules will be fun.
That would be sooooo fun
This is fantastic!!!
I am down for some table top Mario cart
Love them, thank you.
Finally! Took long enough ffs
Finally, a game I can get behind
Finally a post where I can be 100% certain that it is not a joke. I've fallen for too many dumb "pranks" today, so it is a delight that you guys actually listen to your community and give it what it truly desires.
I could totally make use of this is a twisted game of Gaslands.
I actually had that same thought! Mutated Rat Go-Cart Team
Old and busted: Trying new products not on April 1. New Hotness: Acting like something is an April fool's day joke to see how we react. Just shut up and make a fantasy cart racing game so I can give you my money like the filthy capitalist mark that I am.
I actually love this, new branch of OPR pls. One Page Racing?🤣
I know what date it is, but can that please be part of the April release for real?
You can download it in the link above ;)
I mean, it's not exactly the worst idea
I wouldn't be mad at a OPR fantasy racing game 🤣
There used to be a karts game, IIRC
💀
Finally
Exactly what I needed for Gretchins!
😆👌🗓️
Yessss
Now I want to see racers from all factions...
Super Ferrario Cart is born
;)
lol, awesome! \m/
I can't wait to see the Jackal Racer!
It's beautiful <3 Glad you made this brave decision
Aw man you got me I thought I had died and went to hell
Finally! I've been asking for this for ages! I'm so happy!