Zoom link for TONIGHT at 6pm

I won't be able to join y'all, but I have a question if you don't mind reading it. Loyal fucker and lurker here in the Patreon/listening to the share-apy sessions, so thanks for what you do! Similar to you, Krystyna, I have historically been no-contact with my parents and sister. Currently I have a superficial relationship with my parents, and no relationship with my sister. Family drama blew up back in 2020 and we had a disastrous family therapy session where my sister essentially verbally abused me. Since then, she had a baby and didn't tell me about it, and we have not spoken aside from her texting me happy birthday every year. My parents are very religious and very close with my sister, who is also very religious. My parents called me last night and delivered some difficult news about my sister's health. She has a diagnosis that is concerning and may involve brain surgery. They wanted to let me know so I could do something about it if I wanted to. The subtext is loudly "you should repair your relationship with your sister because she could die." They never have advocated for my sister reaching out to me and repairing a relationship with me -- it is all my fault and therefore my job to fix. I appreciate them keeping me in the loop, since they actively hid my sister's pregnancy from me. I feel torn. Since I am not religious like my family, they don't know how to respect boundaries and the fact that I have different beliefs than them (like my dad is a scientist but literally believes the earth is only like 8,000 years old and God created it in 7 days). In the past, when I have tried to maintain a "less-contact" or "low-conflict" model of a relationship with them, they express consistent discomfort about not being able to examine everything I believe and think and seem to think that I should be comfortable sharing every single part of my life with them. It's obvious to me my parents wants me to reach out to my sister and offer support. I don't want to do that out of guilt or shame. I also want to respect the fact that my sister is going through a tough medical diagnosis with two young kids and that maybe now is not the time for reconciliation/difficult conversations outside of this diagnosis. My mom mentioned that one of the kids will need a lot of support and delicate handling when it comes to difficult stuff. I guess I'm wondering if there is a middle ground I can find or if any of you have any words of advice for me.