Right Reasons: Aubrey Tells Mike About "The Bachelor"
As you may have heard on yesterday's episode, we're finally going to start offering bonus episodes! You've all been supporting us for nothing whatsoever and it's about time we started giving back. Thanks for being here.
We have no idea what form these will take in the future, but for the last few months we've been steadily building a list of Rantathons — topics that come up while we're recording and one of us has to say, "omg stop me, I could go on about this about this for hours."
We are ranty people and this happens a lot; it's already quite a list. Today's bonus episode started out as an extended tangent in our Halo Top episode and became a perennial conversation topic whenever we had a few minutes to kill. Eventually we thought, hey we're gonna talk about this anyway, why not record it?
So here it is: Aubrey's guided tour through the flora and fauna of the Bachelor/Bachelorette/Bachelor in Paradise universe. Disclaimer: We recorded this about two months ago, and there has been a *lot* happening in Bachelor world since then. We're already planning a follow-up.
OK, on to the technical stuff! There's two ways to listen to this episode. First, you can play it directly through the Patreon app.
Second, you can use our custom RSS feed to play it through your favorite podcast app. Here's the instructions from Patreon.
We're still figuring this out, so let us know in the comments if you have ideas for future bonus episodes!
See you next month,
A&M
Comments (169)
Oh god I'm with Michael, the bachelor rap made me shrivel up like a salted slug
Ready for the Taylor Frankie Paul update any day, guys
i really enjoy these sorts of recap eps of shows ill never actually watch, they're so fun and i really enjoy both of your critiques and reactions! it's a good way to consume shows like the bachelor sort of by proxy
The rap thing TOOK. ME. OUT.
A SHOT AT LOVE WITH TILA TEQUILA
Sorry, I screamed this lmaooo That show was the very first bi representation I ever saw in media and it meant so much to me at 14 😂🤣😭 But yes, incredibly problematic and horrific to look back on.
Never watched the Bachelor. But this episode made me a little curious, where is a good place to jump in? Is there a certain season that kicked off a run of fun seasons?
sorry to be 8 days late, but the 15th season w/ Hannah Brown (the Alabama lady who MP mentioned) is generally considered. tho, in my opinion, each season is a different contestant with roughly the same amount of drama so I would recommend starting with the newest seasons. iircc Bachelor in Paradise premiered a few weeks ago + I think that's it until next year in terms of new content. hope this helps 😊
I’m currently processing some trauma so I needed some distraction - finally decided to subscribe to your patreon! Thank you for everything you do 🧡
This franchise is my guilty pleasure. It is garbage, but it is MY special little fun garbage and my Bachelor group text is fun.
I’m behind on these episodes so I listened to this right after finishing Joey’s season of the Bachelor this morning. This was so fun to listen to!!
omg when the mention of a clip came up I was HOPING for Hannah B’s season!!!! Yessss
In The Netherlands, we have the gay version. It is called "Prince charming".
The number of times I have come back to listen to this episode.... it absolutely fascinates me every single time
Hah, I can only watch The Bachelorette (or Bachelor in Paradise), i can’t watch The Bachelor. Watching a woman rank men is fun, watching men rank women is gross. 😂😂 (to me, they’re both awful and problematic)
We've actually had a gay version of the Bachelor here in Germany for a few years now and yup... The contestants hooking up with each other has been a consistent issue in most of the seasons 😆
Idk if this has been said before but the mimosa line HAS to have something to do w/ his rampant homophobia
That rap group date has haunted me for years
Not sure if someone already shared this but Aubrey talking about the Christian undertones reminded there was a fan-made Mormon-specific bachelor that was a whole ride
had to look up the video of luke getting his ass handed to him. beautiful.
This is still my favorite Patreon episode haha
Ari was trash
I listened to all of your content in less than 2 weeks and immediately came for the bonus episodes. I love you both so much and your podcast has been all I’ve been talking about
I am straight up sure someone mentioned this, but Micheal - an author of ‘the One to Watch’ listed you in her acknowledgment, because this novel is about the first plus size woman on the equivalent of the Bachelorette.
I recently heard a podcast about a super fucked up reality show in the UK in the 2000’s. It’s the bachelorette, but she’s trans and it’s a surprise reveal in the end and everyone involved needs counseling. It’s the crazies to story. So sad. It’s called there’s something about Myriam. :(
That was an INCREDIBLE podcast. I’m sad that she died so young, I think she could have been part of a really interesting conversation if she was around now.
This episode is making me miss the Bachelor! I'm a new fan from BC. I've been bingeing your back catalog. Love your content Michael sounds so much like Adam Devine.
Mike, I'll watch The Bachelor with you! 😂
Please do an episode on the shoddy af ‘Married at First Sight’. I bet some people don’t know it started as a ropey UK show with really cheap production value + was just vaguely depressing from the start…
Gosh what a trip that show is! When it was first imported to Australia I refused to watch it because, as a gay, I wasn't legally allowed to marry yet. The combination of people like Fred Nile vomiting about the sanctity of marriage being ruined by the gays while Married At First Sight existed was too much for my poor sensibilities. I can now marry, but I still haven't watched this depressing show.
I just want to say I'm so here for the two Korean women that left during a rose ceremony to fall in love with each other. Also the completely bisexual season of "Are You The One" had some gay fun.
I don’t agree about reality tv. The way it treats the contestants is often abusive.
I can’t stop thinking about how Tila Tequila queer baited us all…..”In March 2018, Tequila uploaded a video to YouTube to confess she was neither lesbian nor bisexual; she only pretended to be in order to create ratings for A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila and had a boyfriend while filming the show.”
This actually changed my feelings about The Bachelor family of products.
Hi! New to the Patreon but not the show…and catching up on this backlog of bonus eps! Thanks for everything y’all do - the show is incredible. This episode made me desperately want you two to cover Love Is Blind. I’m both sorry and happy to suggest it as a topic 🤣
Omg I NEED love is blind ep I think it’s the perfect topic for this podcast.
Wasn't there a suitcase full of protein dude on married at first sight?
I don't watch the Bachelor but I do follow dedicated meme instagrams and if it is on around me I "reluctantly" watch it
need
I need you both to go on Chatty Broads
Let maintenance Phase needs a Snyder cut of each episode for Patreon members only
Just gotta say that the dude who picked no one used to drive around town in an orange Hummer with the license plate BACH1
There was a gay bachelor show called something like The Prince,
Links to the clips 🥺
Aubrey you gotta listen to Game of Roses, it’s the best Bachelor recap podcast out there
Aubrey is a true bachelor scholar - those clips are 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Would pay an inordinate amount of money for an Aubrey bachelor recap pod
The Luke guy they talked about was scary! I wouldn't be surprised if he also had a case brought against him too.
did anyone else see that chad had a domestic violence case brought against him??
I have always been opposed to the Bachelor, but this sucked me in and sent me down a bachelor/ette youtube rabbit hole! ugh! I might end up watching it now... ahhh
the right stuff by NKOTB should be their new theme song
This episode was worth the price of admission alone. Worth noting that the current season in Australia has an Indigenous Australian bisexual Bachelorette with 50/50 men and women contestants. Chaos ensues...
My brain rejected it like a transplant🤣
You need to watch Angie Kent’s season of the Australian bachelorette! She told a massive creeper the fuck off
Would love for you guys follow up on this and talk about how many past contestants are influencers for terrible diet products and MLM shit!
I went to 6-12th grade with a Bachelor contestant for most of that he bullied me usually about my weight he nicknamed me Jenny Craig.
Have you read ‘One to watch’ by Kate Stayman-London, Aubrey? It’s a take on the Bachelorette but with a plus size woman as the lead. I really enjoyed it knowing nothing about the show. It might tickle you. Loved this episode and hearing you and Michael giggle in these bonus episodes is giving me joy. Thank you for them.
Damn I've never watched a single episode but I kinda want to now... 👀👉🏻👈🏻
Mike saying “I wanna die” after hearing the rap verses made me cry laughing
Would like to point out that BN has had 3 POC leads. Rachael, Tayshias, and Matt (and now Michelle, but the season just premiered). Still way too low given how many fan faves get looked over for a personified pair of khaki pants. Including the new Bachelor *sigh*
I *need* to know Audrey's thoughts on this season of BiP
This was amazing and v educational (we also didn’t know much about the bachelor franchise). However, for some fucking reason we DID watch More to Love (~10 yrs ago?) and I am dying to hear Aubrey’s take on this show. It was a purported “fat Bachelor” — but there was a lack of diversity in bodies (and race) on that show, which made it pretty boring. Definitely no women over 300 lbs. And some of the women were just fucking tall. It was so weird. And of course there was no Bachelorette version of more to love…
Aubrey!!! Not sure if anyone has already alerted you to this EXTREMELY important news, but the next Bachelorette in Australia is bisexual and will be having male and female suitors!! AND she’s First Nations Australian (Noongar / Yamatji)! Her name is Brooke Blurton, she rocks. The season premieres in a few weeks, I cannot WAIT.
Was catching up on old episodes recently, heard about this bonus episode, and went to subscribe IMMEDIATELY.
I did exactly this 🤣
So happy i was able to finally get the patreon episodes and also if i dont get merch that says "go drink a fucking mimosa".......then I will make it bc I love both so much.
I could listen to Aubrey and Michael talk about the bachelor universe for HOURS
Great episode, but I’m still not watching the Bachelor/Bachelorette.
Does anyone know where I can find link to what they're watching?
This ep alone was worth the price of admission.
I know you have already gone into the president’s physical fitness test, but as a newly minted middle school student, I would really appreciate if you guys went a little deeper into anti fatness in schools, and how students can help combat it.
Can we also talk about why the bachelor franchise doesn't include the outtakes in the actual show? Those are usually the BEST scenes!
I would love a shirt of "The Michael Hobbes seal of 'It's Fine!'"
yes! it's been a mantra for me lately. It's fine!
I just read this romance novel “One To Watch” which was a super fun read for fans of the Bachelor franchise (probably lame if you’re not), and the author thanks both Aubrey AND Michael individually in the acknowledgments for helping her understanding of fatphobia! Surprised they didn’t mention it in the episode!
This was the kind of content I needed in my life today. Thank yiu both!
AUBREY! Can you please talk to michael about this season of the bachelorette with Katie as well as the scandal around last season with Matt James?
Yes!!! I kept thinking waiting for this to come up!
I was so concerned you weren’t going to talk about the ‘right reasons’! It’s rife in the Australian versions as well ( which incidentally seem to produce either long term relationships or utterly confusing terrible behaviour- like the guy who ditched the winner for the runner up or the guy who picked NOONE!)
I really appreciate Audrey bc I also acquired the “indefensible hobby” of the bachelor. People stare at me slack jaw when I admit this. I
I'm a psychologist and I lost my first supervisor to complications following gastric bypass. She had it done at a reputable hospital but they nicked her bowel and she went septic and died, leaving two young kids. I've been surprised that over the yrs the death rate remains steady and no one talks about the risks of death or even serious complications.
That's absolutely awful! There was no mention of death rates or any death at all in what I read, which seems like an oversight. I know all surgery has risks, but is the risk of death worth it just to be thinner??
Yeah, and the girl who got it and they say she's now eating "at most, a cup of eggs, meat or cauliflower or broccoli as a meal." That does not seem normal or ok!
Just read an article about bariatric surgery for teens on NPR, and there were some definite cringe moments/quotes in there. It made me realize that I've only ever heard about weight loss surgery from the perspective of the medical community concerned about the "obesity epidemic" and people who are its "success stories." I would love to hear the Maintenance Phase perspective on it, especially on offering it to teens, which seems kind of sketchy to me, but I have never been in the position where these teens are so maybe that's just me. Here's the article btw: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2021/06/17/1002602277/bariatric-surgery-works-but-isnt-offered-to-most-teens-who-have-severe-obesity
This was on the radio today and I was thinking about Mike and Aubrey the whole time! There were def some cringey moments and a lot of "the teens need this to keep from aquiring all the diseases that come with being fat for a long time" reasoning while also the teen herself made mostly cosmetic arguments for it.
Would love to listen to all the unedited episodes! Love u guys! 😍
I’ve never dared suggest a topic before because I love everything you do and I just want you to do what you want. BUT I wonder if you’d be interested in a You’re Wrong About-Maintenance Phase collab about Delta Burke as a maligned woman of the 90s. I’ve been rewatching Designing Women and I was thinking about the similar media fascination with Oprah and Delta Burke’s bodies. I just love Delta Burke and also the media narrative about her absolutely contributed to my internalization of anti-fat bias as a child. I would love to hear all of you just being kind to Delta Burke.
Unreal is a Bachelor satire and watching that has kept me from ever watching The Bachelor/Bachelorette.
Same. I Loved UnReal and was like "i don't need to watch that other show now"
More episodes soon please Wonderful Duo!
I’m confused. Is there only one episode?
So far.
my favorite genre of podcast is person 1 explaining a thing they know a lot about to person 2 while they all make jokes. I will listen to literally anything you guys produce because your chemistry is fab! I do really want to hear Mike get mad about Elon Musk though.
On the Oprah episode: lets hear more about what "size 10 Calvin Klein jeans" even means, whether now, the episode in question, or the ten years prior when the jeans first fit.
Omg just had to pause the Oprah episode to come here and say YES PLEASE can we have bonus content of Aubrey reading names of random Oprah guests for Mike to tell us if they’re trash, and why. I laughed so hard just imagining it ❤️❤️
Hey, I'm excited about this new bonus episode! Tysm! I also wanted to say how much I appreciated the validation of CFS in the Moon Juice episode. I was afraid that it was going to be mentioned as a rich people illness but instead you talked about it as an actual chronic illness. I was so relieved I actually started to cry a little. It was such a small thing, but it's only in recent years that the media has started to report on CFS as a real thing. To have some of my new favorite podcasters also talk about it that way really made my day. So thanks again.
I'm relistening to the weight watchers episode and like, I would totally love to hear a bonus episode or longer discussion of straight women's lack of orgasms!
As a lover of Maintenance Phase AND The Bachelor franchise this filled my soul
So good. Your episodes are always a total delight! Really appreciate you both!!
This was so much fun to listen to! Thanks Aubrey for giving all us queers some insight into the heterosexual nonsense!
Wrong thread. #eldermillennial
On "Tila Tequila: a shot at love"-- they obvs had her narrow it down to one man and one woman for the finale. The lesbian "finalist" was SUCH a babe and seemed to be relatively sincere in her feelings for ms. Tequila, and if i remember correctly she was ultimately rejected. Watching a loveable WLW get her heart broken, not just bc her love interest chose someone else but bc she decided "I choose MEN!!!!" broke my baby gay heart and seemed a lot more mean-spirited than necessary.
Oh! and i was surprised Aubrey didn't mention ms. tequila's later turn to full-on Neo-Nazism. To be fair though, theres a LOT to say ab all this lol
You are both so amazing to spend time with! I could listen to you talk about anything. So excited for future episodes and bonuses ❤️
We don't have The Bachelor in Spain (mercifully, I think, after listening to the clips 😂😂) and I LOVED Aubrey explanations. Thank you so so much for these special episodes 💚💚💚
After listening to this episode again, I looked up the Chad segment so I could see this dude. I missed it in the audio, but in the video, I noticed that he said "why are there so many crabs around here? F**k you, crabs!" I couldn't stop laughing. Those poor crabs. Don't yell at the crabs, Chad!
Loved this! Thanks guys. Also, I was like, I can't believe Aubrey likes The Bachelor (meanwhile rushing home to catch up on Seeking Sister Wife) 😅😅😅
love this episode!!! i cannot recommend enough the podcast "Game of Roses" for bachelor content - they cover the bachelor like a sport but they also are critical of the producer manipulation, racial inequities, etc that plague the bachelor franchise. Definitely think Aubrey would appreciate this take on the bachelor!
Yes Aubrey please listen to Game of Roses, you would totally relate to their take on it and would also make an excellent guest for a “welcome to the pit” episode!
I’d be interested in an episode on ARFID and neurodivergence. Are there any other medical/mental diagnoses that tend to be co-morbid with eating disorders? Why is the plus-sized fashion market so bafflingly underserved? I’ve heard a lot of wild guesses but I’d like to hear an informed take.
Off topic, but I need a shirt that says "Oh, buddy."
I just revisited the Celery Juice episode to listen to the fantastic and hilarious descriptions of its taste. Thanks for the reliable day brightener. You put your taste buds on the line for your audience and I appreciate it more than you can know!
This episode makes me want to start watching The Bachelor 😂
So, two things: first, I am a reformed Bachelor/ette watcher and this took me back so hard - like, literally, it’s 11:30 at night and I’ve been watching Bachelor In Paradise (season of The Chad) for the last 4 hours. Hot DAMN how did I not watch this show before?!?! Second, I read this book last year called One To Watch, and it is basically the story of a Bachelorette type show that decides to choose a fat woman as the bachelorette and OMG it was AMAZING. Please go read it. Like, now. Love you guys. MP and You’re Wrong About are my fave, fave podcasts. Aubrey, please sign on to another podcast because I NEED MORE OF YOU IN MY LIFE.
This was so fun to listen to! Surprised you didn’t mention “More to Love,” the spin-off with the fat contestants. The guy went to my high school. When the show came out, his high school girlfriend posted a million pictures of them on Facebook, ostensibly to show that he wasn’t fat back then, because she couldn’t stand the thought of people thinking she had dated a fat guy.
My partner and I were thinking the exact same thing! Very interesting about that guy and the horrid hs gf. That show was trash and those people weren’t even that fat!
Am I allowed to link to one of the best TikToks ever, with ideas for queer bachelor?
I laughed so hard listening to this! Thank you so much for making it
I fucking love this so much! I woud listen to a bach recap podcast by you both 100%
so funny! you both are such amazing people. very excited to be a patron :) thank you for all that you do
When you mentioned a uniquely bad gay reality show I though you were going to say Boy Meets Boy, which tried to solve the problem of the contestants sleeping together by having half the guys be straight. All the contestants knew and the lead didn’t until the end. And if a straight guy won he would have gotten a huge cash prize. It was uniquely horrific.
If you guys think the US Bachelor is wild, you should watch the Australian version... one guy didn’t pick anyone, a creepy local council member lost his job, and we’re about to have our first bisexual bachelorette... this show is an experience!
I love ya’ll soooo much - this was so good!!!
Lol I gave one month before there was anything and you pulled me back in with bachelor nation content
I mean I personally think it’s worth at LEAST $5 a month to hear Aubrey’s laugh - the episodes are just bonus, and the bonus episodes are more than we deserve!!! 🥰
Truth. Aubrey's laugh is wonderful.
You guys need to see the Australian bachelor. It is sooooo good.
@Aubrey do you ever listen to bachelor podcasts?? It’s its own industry at this point
I have absolutely 0% interest in this show but had absolutely 100% enjoyment of this podcast episode.
Manifesting Aubrey as a special guest on Game of Roses!!!
Also FWIW, there was like... also some weird race stuff around the BIP assault allegations that's probably worth mentioning.
Haven’t listened yet because I’m suspicious that you could top the CELERY JUICE episode. I LOVE YOU GUYS! ❤️
Hannah Brown’s season aired when I was fresh out of an abusive relationship, and there’s no way you can convince me that the producers didn’t knowingly cast an abuser when it came to Luke.
There actually was a gay men version of the Bachelor called Finding Prince Charming hosted by Lance Bass. It was terrible in all the best ways. Oddly enough only two of the contestants hooked up - the rest said they fell under the spell of the competition and became sister-wives. Instead of giving out roses the main guy put ties on his contestants.
I was scouring the comments to see if anyone shared this! That show was ridiculous and addictive 🤣 https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finding_Prince_Charming
I subscribed instantly, I am so here for anytime Aubrey describes heterosexual nonsense to an increasingly bewildered Michael 😂
OHMEHGERD!!! So excited to be listening to you guys in a BONUS EPISODE 🥳🥳🥳 Hands down, my absolute favourite podcast! Aubrey and Mike, you are both so fabulous 💐
Hi, I embarassedly tweeted at Mike asking for his opinion on the Colton coming out as gay debacle. This episode was a real treat. Aubrey, can you live stream yourself watching Katie's men come in?!
The upcoming Australian bachelorette is bisexual and will have a cast of half men and half women which I am so happy to see! Though there have been people commenting thoughts similar to yours that it may end up with contestants hooking up with each other. I guess we just have to hope they are there “for the right reasons” hahah.
And she’s indigenous! Can’t wait!
As someone who has never watched this show, this was such a wild ride. Also have either of you read One to Watch by Kate Stayman-London. It's a contemporary romance focused on a fat woman who ends up being the star of one of these bachelorette style shows. The romance side is not fantastic but the fatphobia commentary and the all fame is abuse conversations are actually fascinating. Really interesting read.
I have never watched anything Bachelor but this was highly entertaining. I realize I will essentially love anything you two talk about. More please!
Extremely same.
This is delightful. Can you do ANTM next pleeeeeeaaaaase
Listening to Michael learn the ins and outs of the Bachelor franchise in real time was gold.
YESSS I love this so much. Thanks for the bonus content!
The sketch show where they do a play on gay bachelor is SNL with Jesse Tyler Ferguson and it is amazing.
finally, my two special interests have combined into one: medical/wellness debunking and podcasts about the bachelor that i listen to despite never having seen the show. 10/10 would absolutely listen to more of this.
I need for you to know that a fully “no+/sexually fluid” season of “are you the one exists” that included only not straight/gay people because of math: https://www.autostraddle.com/we-watched-mtvs-sexually-fluid-dating-show-are-you-the-one-and-unfortunately-we-love-it/
Jeebus, I could listen to you two talk for hours about staplers. Also, Lunchmeat Chad is a great band name.
I'm sad Nick Viall's halo top ad wasn't the starter for the rough cut being 20% bachelor. Looking forward to the follow up! (And all the other bonus eps)
Thanks guys!
I don't watch the Bachelor shows and I'm still not going to, but this recap was everything that I needed this morning.
The patreon Audio RSS works fine in any podcatcher, not just Apple Podcasts.
Such a good episode. Also fun fact lunchmeat chad was unsurprisingly arrested for DV last year
This was EVERYTHING. You two should do a recap show of the next season
There are so many shows in my life that I don't watch firsthand, but know every in and out of because I have friends who are obsessed and I like listening to their recaps of episodes and reactions. I could literally listen to Aubrey recount every Bachelor(ette) episode for 10 more hours.
It should work with other apps too! https://support.patreon.com/hc/en-us/articles/115005429546
This has quickly become my fav podcast. You two are so much fun to listen to
Yessss this episode. I would love to hear Aubrey talk through Bachelor in Paradise.
Extremely here for made up helicopter statistics! I have never watched an episode of either, but this bonus episode absolutely delighted me!
Woke up this morning excited to listen - highlight of my day! I loved this episode! So fun to hear you guys talk about pretty much anything but this was such a good pick.
Aubrey, I feel like you would be an enthusiastic viewer of Love Island, please please tell me you’re aware of this show? Edited to add: ah, I’ve just heard the last sentence of the episode where you mention it!
Your podcasts make me laugh so much! Thank you for sharing your joyful selves with such interesting and fun conversations!
Don't worry -- the instructions let you copy the RSS link and paste it into any podcast manager! (Even the no-longer-supported software I use to listen to podcasts on my legacy hardware.)
Between having TWO episodes of Mike and Aubrey this week and the fact that Aubrey is the first guest on Big Mood Little Mood with Danny Lavery, I think this is what it feels like to die of happiness.
Same!!!
Head's up for Android users that I had to copy the private RSS feed from Patreon in my browser - the Patreon app copy isn't working. Once I got it from Chrome though I was able to add it to my BeyondPod player.
You literally could not have picked a better bonus episode for me! I’m already excited for the follow-up 😂