Demon lord ch3 Sketch 1-8
Alright let's begin this big bastard project. I wish i can sketch more pages but catch a bit of cold yesterday. Anyway it's essentialy a prolouge got a lot character to introduce. So any suggestion and help for lot of grammar mistake are apperciate.
Comments (26)
So Hype to see this,
same. I am counting days to that update.
When are you going to finish or show use some clips of it
hmm we changed good men heroes in sexy demons haha
And so the third chapter begins, I hope you overcome that cold.
@ibenz009 Get better soon! Alright everyone, sorry I'm late! Was at work/sick when this dropped ... but to make it all up, PLENTY OF GRAMMAR EDITS AND SHAKESPEAREAN ENGLISH, NOTED IN UPPERCASE! Page 1: Narration: YONDER NEAR THE OUTSKIRTS OF THE KINGDOM … TEN MONTHS AFTER THE SLAYING OF THE DEMON LORD … Civilian: MY LEGS DO FAIL ME … I FEEL NAUGHT. MY LIFE EBBS AWAY? THUS IS MY RECOMPENSE FOR THE ASSAULT OF THAT THING WITH A CLEAVER. OH, PA … I CRAVE THY PARDON. I SHOULDST HATH FLED AS THOU TOLD ME. I AM WROTH WHENCE THAT DEVIL HARMED THEE. FOR THAT MUST BE A DEMON. NEVER BEFORE HATH MINE EYES BEHELD ONE. WE ARE BUT FLIES TO TH' DEVILS; THEY SLAUGHTER US FOR THEIR SPORT… DAMNE. MINE BLOOD DOTH BOIL. WHEREFORE HATH WE WRONGED THEE!? WHEREFORE DID WE MERIT THIS!? WHEREFORE!? WHEREFORE DOTH WE DIE LIKE CURS!? HOW UNJUST … THERE IS SO MUCH I WOULD DO. Page 2: Civilian: Wha …? WHO GOES … !? WHO BE THAT!? AH! I DOTH REMEMBER THE TALE FROM A JOURNEYING STAGECOACH. SHE STILL APPEARS WHEREIN TRAGEDY GOEST … WITH MIRTHFUL DELIGHT, WATCH UNFOLD. WHENCE THOU NOT SEE HER, DOST NOT APPROACH HER. WHATSOME'ER SHE OFFERS THEE, DOST NOT RECEIVE. OR ELSE THAT WITCH WOULDST DAMN THEE IN THE DARK. Dragon: STRANGE … YOU … SAME AS US. WHY ATTACK? WHY NO FEED!? Aria: O ILL ONE, REPENT TO HER. Seek solace in MINE hand and be cleansed by HER RADIANCE.
Page 3: Civilian: Ah … TIS’ GONE … WHEREFORE … did … she … Aria: IS IT YOU THAT’S afraid of PEACEFUL SLUMBER? Or is it YOUR IRE that KEEPS YOU from PASSING ON? Foolish girl - YOUR WOUNDS ARE BEYOND SAVING. If you wish to live that much, I PROPOSE a choice. Civilian: Civilian: What … What DOTH SHE SAITH!? Aria: DO NOT CONFUSE this as your salvation. Civilian: SAID HE, “HARK, BE NOT BEGUILED BY WITCH’S WORD.” The witch STILL DOTH TEMPT WIT’ PROMISES FALSE.” Aria: Take my hand if YOU’LL accept this contract. Page 4: Civilian: PRITHEE FORGIVE ME, FATHER. I S’PPOSE I’M ILL HARKENED TO THINE WORD. I do but not my life concludes in this manner. Aria: “If that is your answer …” “Then the pact is sealed.” Leo (sword): HAIL! YOUR HIGHNESS, REYNALD! Reynald: Ah, Gah! I’M AWAK’D, GOOD SIR! Leo: SEEMS IT THOU HATH NOT SLEPT ONE WINK! FRET NOT! TO NIGHT, I SHALT SING THEE TO SLEEP with GLORIOUS LULLABY WRIGHT by myself! It WOULDST SOOTH BOTH THINE HEART AND SOULl, MY LIEGE. Robard (Hammer): GOD DAMN IT, Leo! The LAD DOTH NOT NEEDETH NOT HEAR THAT TRUMPERY. HE DOTH YET ACCUSTOM HIMSELF TO THE NEW PLACE, that’s all. Leo: TILLY-VALLY! MINE MASTERWORK WARRANTIZES to COUCH any man, woman, and CHILDE to SLUMBER. EVEN THOU SLEPT AS DOTH A BABE ATTENDING TO IT. Robard: ‘CAUSE I STRUCK myself DOWN! What degenerate sang WITHOUT PAUSE FOR THREE HOURS!? Leo: Ha! What kind of MADRIGAL lasts less than three hours!? Robard: A NATURAL one!?
How many pages for this chapter do you have planned out? Especially after finishing your longest work yet?
cannot sleep without watch this great work。
super excited for the next chapter!
I just went ahead and did a full transcribing of the eight pages, making corrections as I went along. Page 1: Somewhere near the edge of the kingdom 10 months after the Hero slew the Demon Lord I can't move my legs... I can't feel anything... Am I dying? I guess that's what I get for charging that thing with a kitchen knife. Ah, Pa. I'm so sorry. I should have ran like you told me. I was so angry when that monster hurt you. So that must be a demon. It's my first time seeing one. It's slaughtering everyone like flies. Dammit, I'm so angry. What did we do wrong? Why do we deserve this? Why!? Why!? Why do we have to die like dogs? It's so unfair... There's so much I wanted to do. Page 2: What... Who's...? Who is that? Ah! I remember the story from the passing caravan. The black veil witch. She who dwells in inky shadow. She always appears where tragedy strikes. Gleefully watching it unfold. When you see her, do not approach her. Whatever she offers you, do not accept. Or else the witch will drag you deep into the night. (I'm assuming the errors here are a stylistic choice, so I'm preserving them.) Strange... You're same as us... Why attack? Why no feed? Why? O wicked one. Repent to me. O sickened one. Repent to her. Seek solace in my head and be cleansed by her radiance. Page 3: Ah... It's gone... Why... Did... She? Still clinging to life, Human? Are you that afraid of the peaceful rest? Or is it your ire that keeps you from moving on? Foolish girl. Your wounds are beyond saving. You only prolong your suffering. If you wish to live that much. I can propose to you a choice. What... What is she saying? Offer yourself to me, and live as my familiar. Do not confuse this as your salvation. You'll become a demon. Forever bound to me. You'll live as my tool. My blade. My slave. I'll use you again and again as I see fit. What I offer you is the path of the damned. Think very carefully. Pa always said, "Do not for the witch's words." "The witch always lures you with a false promise." Take my hand if you accept our contract.
Page 4 Sorry, pa. I guess I'm really bad at following your words. I just didn't want my life to end like this. If that is your answer. Then the pact is sealed. Hey prince! Your highness, Renald. Ah gah! I'm awake, sir. It seems you didn't get enough sleep. Fret not! Tonight I shall sing you to sleep with an epic lullaby composed by myself! It will soothe both your heart and soul, you highness. Damnit, Leo, the lad don't need to hear that crap. He's still getting used to a new place, that's all. Nonsense! My masterpiece is guaranteed to put any man, woman, and chld to sleep! Even you slept like a baby listening to it. That's because I knocked myself out! What kind of degenerate sings non-stop for three hours!? Ha! What kind of song lasts less than three hours? A normal one? Page 5 By Goddess, I wish they'd have just chopped your head off when you banged that duke's daughters. Ahh, my beloveds! THey must be yearning for my tender embrace! Fate is so cruel tearing us apart like this. It's like a poem come to life. I can't believe your dumbass almost won the kingdom tourney. I proved my prowess to you in our glarious sparing, didn't I? Yeah, yeah. Scouts report that another village was razed by demons. That's the fourth this month. Ugh! Another piece of paper work to report. How was your first week at the fortress, young prince? I hope our band of misfits doesn't bother your highness too much. Not at all, Sir Valic. Everyone is very welcoming. To tell the truth, compared to the palace, it's really peaceful here. Even a prince has it rough, huh? As 58th son, I have no chance to ascend to the throne. In fact, there's no spot for me in the royal court at all. To my brother, I'm just an inconvenience. Well, in the end, all of us are unwanted nobles. That's why they put us here in the boonies. Still, the demon activity has been increasing in the past few months. This is concerning. Aside fom the commander and vice-commander, only five of us are full fledged paladins. The rest are just a normal militia. We don't stand a chance if a major demon attack happens. A major demon attack!? The demon lord is already dead! I wager it's just a pack of feral demons. Besides, there's nothing out here worth attacking. We're sitting on an old vault full of useless relics. A true brilliant knight must always prepare for any situation. Even with my might and our squad's powess. There is only so much that five paladins can do again... Archdemon attack! Gah!
Looks very interesting so far with a nice intro for the new characters. Can't wait to see Gilda do more of what she does best.
wait is this Part 2 of chapter 3? or is this chapter 4
I did not see this twist coming. Looking forward to more. More Paladins for the Gilda'd Army of the Demon Lord.
glinda's at it again.
Dialogue corrections: (page-panel – blank means no changes) 1-1: "10 months after the *Heroes have* slain the Demon Lord" 1-2: "I guess *that's* what I get for charging that thing with *a* kitchen knife." 1-3: 1-4: "*It slaughtered* everyone like *flies*…" 1-5: "Why!? Why!? Why do we have to die like *dogs*!"
2-1: 2-2: "The *Black-Veiled* Witch." 2-3: "She who *dwells* in inky shadow. She always *appears* where the tragedy goes. Gleefully watching *it* unfold. When you see her*,* do not approach her. Whatever she *offers* you*,* do not accept." 2-4: 2-5: "*You* same as us. Why attack? Why no feed?" 2-6: "O wicked one. Repent to me. O *sickened* one. Repent to her. Seek *solace* in my hand and be *cleansed* by her *radiance*."
I like where this is going. Here are my notes - I wasn't sure about some things so I put them in (round brackets). page 1: - heroe -> hero[] - I guess that['s] what I get for charging that thing with [a] kitchen knife - like you told me [to]. - so that[] must be a demon - it's slaughter[ing them all] like [flies] - there's so much I want[ed] to do page 2: - who[]...? (I wouldn't do "who's" on its own - either "who" or "who is") - she who dwell[s] in inky shadow[s] - she always appear[s] where [] tragedy [happens] - gleefully watching it[] unfold - whatever she offer[s] you - (I'm not quite sure about the meaning of the panel with "you're same as us" - is it comparing the witch to the humans? or to the other demon? what does "not feed" mean?) - o sicken[ed] one (? - not sure either) - seek sola[]ce [by] my hand and be cleanse[d] by her radian[ce] page 3: - or is it you[r] ire(/anger?) that keep[s] you from moving on - you[r] wound[s] are beyond [salvation]. you['re] only prolong[ing] your suffering - live that much[,] I can [offer] you a choice - do not confus[e] this as [] salvation. you'll become a demon, forever bo[u]nd to me. - i'll use you again[st] demon[s] as I see fit - what I offer you is [the] path of the dam[n]ed. - pa always [said] - the witch always lure[s] you with [] false promise[s] - if you[] accept page 4: - at following your [advice] - just [don't] want my life to end - it seem[s] you didn't - to sleep with [an] epic lullaby compose[d] by - heart and soul[], your high[]ness - the lad [doesn't] need - he['s] still getting used to [this(?)] new place, that['s] all - my masterpiece guarantee[s] to put any man[,] woman[,] and child - even you['ve] slept like a baby after listen[ing] to it - that['s] because I knock[ed] myself - what kind [of] degenerate [sings] non-stop for three hours - song last[s] less - [any] normal one?! (optional but might sound better) page 5: - by [the] goddess, I wish they just [had] chop[ped] your head off when you bang[ed] - fate[] is so cruel - proved my prow[]ess - [a] scou[]t has report[ed] that another village [was] raze[d] by a demon. that's [the] fourth - ugh[]! (not clear about the sentiment here - bit weird if you complain that you have to report a report?) - band of misfit[s] - compare[d] to the pala[]ce - prince [has] it rough[], - as 58[th] (58??????) son I have no chance [of] ascend[ing] [the] throne. - no spot in [the] royal - an inconvenien[ce] - unwanted [by the] noble[s] (or [nobility]) - has been increas[ing] in the[] past few month[s] - from [our] commander and [our] vice-commander, only five of us are full-fledge[d] paladin[s] - if [a] major - i['d] wager it's just a [group?] of feral demon[s] - beside[s,] there [is] nothing - on [an] old vault full of useless relic[s] - a tru[ly] brilliant - our squad['s] prow[]ess - only so much [] five paladin[s] can do page 6: - doom again['st] mighty - you['re] really good at sneak[ing] - still work[ing] at this hour[]? you know that you['re] suppose[d] to - that['s] none of your business. - we['re] about to close[] up - your problem [with] gilda - about her [is] piss[ing] me off page 7: - "uncle" [was] kind enough - those paladin[s] didn't [notice] a demon [under] the same roof - on how paladin[s] detect demon[s] - how easy [it is] to hide among human[s] if you know the [church's] playbook - if they['ll] stay a bit - that to[o] close - nothing venture[d], nothing gain[ed] - we['ve] finally found page 8: - our goddess['] previous incarnation [is] under this fortress (if 1 relic/1 incarnation) - it[s] rightful master - we['ve] caused in the region - almost tain[t]ed enough - our goddess [was] so generous to [give] that smelly sword to a human (assuming we're talking about chapter 2) - it's [only] fair that [the] stingy human[s] must return what's our[s] - our goddess['] super Hope you get well soon!
Image 1 panel 1 "10 months after the heroes slew the Demon Lord." or "10 months after the Demon Lord was slain by the heroes"
Image 1, panel 4 (middle bottom) "It's slaughtering everyone like flies."
จากที่อ่านก็น่าสนใจ ส่วนตัวผมสนใจไปในทาง world Building มากกว่า แต่สถานการณ์ในเนื้อเรื่องตอนนี้คือกองกำลังของ Demon Lord ฟื้นกลับมาและทำสงครามต่อใช่มั้ยครับ? เพราะสถานการณ์จากเนื้อเรื่องที่ปะติปะต่อได้ก็คือ - Demon Army ทำลายหมู่บ้าน -Gilda เกณฑ์และเปลี่ยนคนให้กลายเป็นปีศาจใต้สังกัด Demon Lord (โดยการใช้วิธีปลอมรูปโฉมเป็นมนุษย์) พร้อมๆกับทำลายกองกำลังส่วนใหญ่ของอาณาจักรและศาสนจักร -Aria ก็เกณฑ์คนมาเป็น Demon ในสังกัดของตัวเอง แต่มีจุดประสงค์เพื่อทำลาย Demon Lord (แต่นิสัยและท่าทางเปลี่ยนไปมากเลยจากตอนล่าสุด อันนี้มาจากการกรำศึกมาอย่างโชคโชน หรืออิทธิพลของปีศาจ?) อันนี้คือผมเข้าใจถูกใช่มั้ยครับ?
ขอโทษที่ตอบช้านะครับ ลืมไปเลยว่าไม่ได้ตอบ เข้าใจถูกเกือบหมดครับ แค่แ่เรียซีนดะเระ ขึ้นจากการร่วมด้านลบตัวเองครับ กับอาเรียไม่อยากเปลี่ยนเป็นปีศาจแต่ก็ไม่อยากปล่ยให้ตายก็เลยถามเขาก่อน 55
Neat.
Meowoof needs more jigglypuffs
Just taking a moment to praise your sketch work. The page of the new characters sitting around the table is VERY good!