Skirts 2

(For Story With Images, See PDF Below)

After the assembly, Wyatt made a beeline for Regina. His crew followed along. “Hey, Gina. How about baking me a cake?”

Frank, Dante and Mark all snickered.

Regina planted a hand on her hip and grinned. “Cooking is a very useful skill.”

“For a trad wife,” Wyatt said. “Which is what you’ll be. Haha. See ya, hot legs. While you’re learning to make brownies, I’m going to be studying Math and computers and stuff like that because I’m not an airhead.”

Regina grinned and hooked her hair behind her ear. Walking away, she looked back over her shoulder and said, “I hope you boys like puppies.” She went over to a group of girls who’d been hanging out by the stage.

The comeback made no sense to Wyatt and felt off script to their usual banter. He shook his head.  He saw Regina whispering something to the girls. They looked over his way, and then they all started laughing.

“What the hell is going on?” He wondered.

For the next few weeks, everyone settled into the rhythms of the school schedule: classes, clubs and sports, studying after dinner. Wyatt got together with a few different girls and did some heavy petting, but he was determined to get Regina back as his official girlfriend. He was Alpha Wolf. She was Queen Bee. They belonged together. 

Wyatt wasn’t sleeping well. He tossed and turned and woke up several times each night, sweat drenched sheets tangled around him like cobras. He could only remember blurry, funhouse mirror fragments—girls in leotards. Girls in bikinis. He couldn’t understand why any of those things should disturb him. He loved seeing girls in leotards and bikinis. The girls in his dreams, he seemed to remember, had sweet curves. He had some notion that he wanted them, found them hot, but there was something that felt wrong about wanting them.

The most striking image, and the one that lingered longest after he woke, was a girl riding a unicorn.  He couldn’t see her face, but there was something dark and foreboding about her, something dangerous. In his dreams, she would seem to be riding along, almost as if in a trance, then she would slowly look toward him, raise her hand and point before whispering… something…  No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t understand her. 

The whole scene unnerved him and left him queasy. As he moved away from sleep and the dream began to melt off in the light of day, he would laugh about it. “The only reason I feel weird is because there’s a stupid unicorn in my dream,” he told himself as he splashed cold water on his face. 

Each morning since the dreams started, he woke up anxious, tired and stressed, which made the morning meditation in home room more vital than ever. He found they calmed him. In fact, they calmed him so much he would come out of the meditations with a big, bright smile on his face. Looking around the room, he saw all the guys smiling the same way.

Sister Blanca, meanwhile, observed and after home room kept meticulous records of how many boys had begun to sit with their knees together, how long it took them after meditation to shift back to a more male posture. Mother Superior had been quite pleased to learn that all of the boys had now begun to smile during their meditations. Well, all but Sean, the “new kid,” but she wasn’t concerned about him.

Dante, like the others, came out of the meditations feeling good, but for him that feeling didn’t last. He’d always been husky, to use his mother’s word for it, but he’d been one of those kids who just felt right being heavy. He was a meatball and a fun kid. Now, though, he felt gross and ugly. He found himself often looking at the girls with their slender waists. He wanted to be skinny. He needed to be skinny. He started to diet and exercise more.

Days got more boring again as the excitement of being back at school faded. Then, something extra fun happened. One day, as Wyatt and the boys filed into the lunchroom, they noticed there were no girls. “Where’s the Chickas?’ Dante asked as he carried his salad to their table.

“I was wondering the same thing,” Wyatt said.

The answer came soon as Mother Superior entered and clanged a dinner bell. “Attention, gentleman. Today, as a special treat, the young ladies of Gloucester Orphanage will be serving tasty treats they prepared for you in their baking class.” With that, soft music began to play, and the girls entered carrying little wicker baskets.

“This is too perfect,” Wyatt said as Regina came up to him, opened her basket and handed him a brownie wrapped in plastic wrap. The other girls were doing the same for the other boys.

“Wyatt,” Regina said through clenched teeth as Wyatt accepted the brownie.

“Why, thank you, dear,” Wyatt said, putting on a voice like an old guy from some black and white tv show. “Can you get my pipe and slippers?”

Regina’s eyes went hard, but she kept smiling. “I guess I’m learning to be a proper wife, right?”

“You took the words right out of my mouth.”

“In spite of all my years in denial, I have to admit there is something pleasing about preparing and serving food. I feel more like a woman when I’m in the kitchen.” Her voice sounded fake and forced. She was a terrible actor.

Still, Wyatt almost fell off his chair. “Finally!” He said. “You get it. That’s why they say a woman’s place is in the kitchen.”

Regin grinned. “So true.”

Holly, meanwhile, had approached Dante and offered him a double-chocolate fudge cookie. Dante shook his head. “I’m watching my figure,” he said.

“Good for you,” Holly said. “I’m proud of you, babe.” She and Dante had been going steady.

As soon as she left, Wyatt punched Dante on the arm. “Watching your figure?” He said, shaking his head in disgust. “Fucking gay, dude.”

“I was being funny,” Dante said, though he hadn’t even realized how wrong it sounded coming from a boy’s mouth. Now that Wyatt had called him out, he felt overwhelmed with shame. “I’m the funny fat guy. You know that.”  He pointed to his belly. “See?”

The lunchroom at Gabby could best be described as “shabby shack.” Like the rest of the school, it had moldering walls and dingy tile floors. Numerous posters urging the students to “eat healthy” and “brush your teeth” hung from the walls, but they’d been there so long they’d grown yellow and hung crookedly as if they’d given up on life. Of course, the forever flickering lights gave the whole room the unmistakable horror movie vibe embodied by the rest of the school.

Regina had so far refused to get back together with Wyatt, which annoyed him greatly. With her having been duly humbled due to her baking duties, he decided to stir things up. He had a plan: keep annoying Regina until she realized it would just be easier to say yes.

The nuns who had lunchroom duty typically snuck out to have a smoke about halfway through lunch hour. Wyatt was with his guys, waiting, ready to move as soon as the sisters headed out the door. When they did, he got up and

sauntered over to Regina’s table. She and her crew were  chatting about patterns and stitches—some girl nonsense. He reached over Holly’s shoulder and grabbed a tater tot from her tray. “Catch,” he said and tossed the tot at Regina who dodged it.

“Wyatt,” she said. “I’m so glad you came over.”

“Ready to admit you’ve got a crush on me?” Wyatt said. Regina had a pretty face, with a sprinkling of freckles that drove him wild. As he appreciated her looks, his chest started to ache. It had been happening more and more often. Without giving it any thought, he put a hand to one of his throbbing pecs and gently squeezed, since squeezing lessened the throbbing. 

Seeing Wyatt grimace and squeeze his chest, Regina and her friends exchanged amused glances. “Do you like puppies?” Regina asked in a taunting voice. Just as she asked the question, the lights flickered. The girls all started giggling like Regina had said something hilarious.

“What?” Wyatt said, still squeezing his chest.

“Never you mind,” Regina said with a dismissive wave of her hand just before she changed the subject. “I was just telling the ladies that I am 100% sure we could beat the boys at soccer.”

Wyatt burst out laughing. It wasn’t forced or faked. “You’re nuts,” he said.

“Oh. I’m serious. In fact, the ladies and I are willing to make a bet.”

Ah. Now Wyatt understood all the smirking and secretive glances. The girls had been planning what they thought was a clever little trap. He chuckled. “So, this is the big secret plan you’ve been working on? I knew you were up to something.”

Regina let her mouth drop open into a dramatic O and raised her hands in a gesture of surrender. “You’re so much smarter than me,” Regina said. “You figured it all out. But, ya know, how about a bet and a soccer game anyhow?”

“It’s free money on the table, so sure.”

“I want to make this official, so you won’t try and welch. We’ll have mother superior as a witness.”

“I don’t welch,” Wyatt said, “and besides that, you’re going to lose, so what do I care?”

“All the more reason to make it official. That way, the girls can’t welch. You know how scatter-brained we are.”

Regina referring to girls as scatter-brained? Since when? Every instinct in Wyatt’s head screamed that this was a trap. He remembered the way Mother Superior and the girls had been whispering.  “Nah,” he said. “You’re up to something.”

“Scared?” Regina said. “Chicken?” Her posse began to make clucking noises. Wyatt realized the other kids were watching, listening. He couldn’t lose face in front of the whole school.

“As if. Fine. Let’s do it.”

Regina tossed a tater tot at Wyatt. He caught it and popped it in his mouth. “Nice ribbon,” he said as he turned away. The girls all had to wear big, goofy bows around their necks. He loved to give Regina static about it, though he actually thought it made her look even cuter.

Wyatt headed back to the table where his boys waited. “Cluck, cluck….” Dante started. “Shut the hell up,” Wyatt said, punching him hard on the arm.

The other guys all got real serious and real quiet. “What’s the bet going to be?” Mark said.

“I’m going to make Regina eat some serious humble pie,” Wyatt answered. “She and all her little friends.”

After school, he and Regina sat in Mother Superior’s office. The old nun was a thick limbed, broad-shouldered woman, peasant stock, well-suited to heavy farm work. She sat behind her desk, her great arms folded across her chest, the same cold glare in her eyes as always. On her desk, a candle sat atop a skull, flickering. Wyatt couldn’t help but wonder if the skull was real.

“Before there is any betting, know that I do not tolerate people who renege on their wagers,” Mother Superior said. “Think very carefully before you make any agreements.”

“I’m good,” Regina said.

“I’m ready.”

“State your terms.”

“When the boys win, the girls have to serve as our maids for the rest of the year. Regina has to be my personal maid.” Wyatt waited, half expecting Mother Superior to refuse the terms since she’d always been so big on all that modern woman crap. In fact, it was just his first offer, to better ensure Mother Superior would agree to the second.

Mother Superior, however, didn’t react at all, but merely turned to Regina. “And?”

“When the girls win,” she said, her voice dripping with glee, “the boys have to be the girls and wear the girls’ uniforms for one month, while we will be the boys.”

Wyatt burst out laughing. “You want us to dress like girls? You’re a freak.”

“Mr. Dukes.” Mother Superior said.

“Sorry, Sorry. It’s just– wow.” He shook his head and winked at Regina. “Kinky.”

“I do not agree to these terms,” Mother Superior said.

“What?” Regina said. “Why not?” She sounded surprised and angry, and yet to Wyatt something seemed off, like she was faking it. More bad acting.

“The bets are not equal. Wyatt asks for the rest of the year. You ask for one month. Each bet must be for one month.”

“You know what?” Wyatt said, feeling cocky. “We’ll do the rest of the year in skirts if we lose. No biggie.”

“Are you sure you want to agree to the rest of the year?” Mother Superior asked. “Think carefully before you–”

“I’m all in,” Wyatt said, reaching his hand toward Regina. “Shake on it.”

“Shake on it,” Regina agreed, shaking Wyatt’s hand, meeting his own strong grip with one of her own. 

“An addendum,” Mother Superior said. “If the group that loses fails to meet their obligations, each violation will result in the penalty being extended one day into the summer.

“Agreed,” they each said.

“You will each need a vote of approval from your constituencies. All must agree to the wager, or there is no wager.”

“Fine.” Wyatt and Regina both controlled their groups. They knew they would get the votes.

The two of them walked out together. Regina bumped her shoulder against Wyatt. “You’re going to look so cute in your knee socks,” she said.

“You’re the one who’s gonna look cute while you pick up my dirty underwear.”

“Not gonna happen.”

Regina was gorgeous, and Wyatt always felt a powerful attraction to her, especially when they were bickering.  Yet, whenever he was flirting with her—or making out with the other girls for that matter—he felt strange these days. His chest ached. “You actually think you can beat us?” Wyatt said, putting a palm to his sensitive chest.

Regina’s eyes followed his hand as it went to his sensitive chest, and they sparkled with glee. “You’re going to be surprised.” She put her hand over his and squeezed. “Do you like puppies?”

“What?” He said, his voice cracking as he struggled to understand why he was feeling so—flush—all of a sudden.  Regina stared into his eyes with a piecing intensity he’d never experienced. He parted his lips and sighed, inviting her to kiss him.

With a laugh, Regina spun on her heels and walked away.

“Later hot legs,” Wyatt called, finding his regular voice again, trying to regain the sense of control he felt he’d lost in that odd moment.

Still squeezing his chest, he wondered, “Should I see the school nurse?” Something didn’t feel right.

He went to the nurse’s office. She was young and hot, so it was worth the visit. A sign on the door read “Out sick.”