DIRECTOR'S CUT: Therapist Reacts to BRAVE
Do you ever feel like you're in a conversation but just talking right past each other? Merida and her mother frequently complain that the other just. won't. listen. At the start of the movie, their relationship is full of misunderstandings because they want to be understood, but don't try to understand.
Licensed therapist Jonathan Decker and filmmaker Alan Seawright dissect the mother-daughter relationship in Pixar's Brave - from the issues that plague their relationship at the start, to the ways they seek reconciliation throughout the film, and of course the incredible animation in this film. (You might also get to hear their attempts at a Scottish brogue.)
Comments (6)
I noticed the witch only had one spell: turn everyone into a bear.
Jono, Alan, I doubt you'll see this comment, but your story about your letter to your mom was cathartic for me. I did the same exact thing, just begging her for empathy and pouring my heart out. However, I was met with punishment instead. It's so healing to hear that on another day and in another place, it went differently. It worked. She held you. Thank you both so much for your work, I can't explain how much you have helped me heal from my traumas, and I'm sure a lot of others too. Never stop doing what you love, and I hope it's this for a long time <3
How funny is it that at minute 14, Jono basically came up with the lyrics for Meghan Trainor‘s „Mother“ because that came out a year later… or am I wrong about the facts?
When I get angry, it comes out of no where (sorta) and I become very aware of myself but still lack a Lot of control over myself. For example, I don't remember what "set me off" but I do remember inside my head, I'm telling myself "you're upset right, it's time to walk away" but I'm watching myself, almost like a passenger in my own body, walk towards a cabinet and I know I'm about to hit it, I know that isn't going to go well in anyway, especially since I'm not the fighter type at all, I'm in my head saying things like "that's not the way to my room!", "you know how this turns out, dont". Still I end up hitting the cabinet and the pain brings immediate control and I'm stood there with a throwing hand and annoyed that I won't listen to me in those moments. Even still, that was much better than when I was younger and didn't care at all.
I'm one of those people who get brighter/sharper when angry, like apparently Mrs Decker. It's long confused me that most people make poorly considered choices when angry. Like, when I torpedo a lifelong friendship with six words over a game of Monopoly it's not because I speak without thinking but because I feel the need to protest against their dishonest play. Carefully considered and deliberate choices can still be "bad" choices, obviously. I don't get angry often; I try to avoid it, the way I avoid loaded firearms. It's a frightening responsibility sometimes. Just some thoughts from the angerclarity perspective.
Similarly, while I can certainly get overwhelmed and not know how to express myself, when I'm angry in the vein of frustration (as opposed to upset or hurt) I definitely get more cutting and sharp-tongued; I gain the ability to say the exact right thing to hurt someone while having impulsivity replace caution. Definitely not something I enjoy, and I've had to pay close attention to that and reel myself back in.