Let me pick your Brain! - Part 1

i like the passage, it flows naturally and explains her thoughts well

The passage doesn't seem boring or repetitive. Her attribute point distribution is important and her hesitation is understandable, as it is new for her. As readers, we also don't always remember the effect and importance of each stats, so some reminders are welcome if it mesh well with the story.

What are the disadvantage of lopsided stats, beside the obvious glass canon build with her low vitality ? Maybe she wouldn't be able to handle her high agility or strength ? Would it make her psychic power unusable due to high backlash risk ? She will get more benefits from putting points in her high basic stats, but that mean nothing if she can't use them due to her low vitality. Can her basic vitality be trained ? Strength, agility and some mental stats, I can see, but vitality is more difficult.

I’m wondering the point of their death at the faux graduation only to be brought to a real body then digitized again. Wouldn’t it make more sense to just go digital to digital instead? First death to sovereign dds directly

I've read a few of these responses and most of them make sense, i have these following questions that pop up

My first thought when I read this was, “No!!! Don’t waste your points on vitality!” I personally enjoy character/author thought process and decision making for major decisions and forecasting future build choices. My other thought was if there was a way for her to unlock psychic before her class choice. Even if she pumped all her points into perception, she’d still need the base to increase to 6.5 to be able to hit the 30 point total. At least from what we have heard so far base increases are few and far between and it doesn’t seem like even an absolute focus is going to get there before class selection. It did mention base points with a class so it is possible right after class selection or very soon afterwards. The Lecture mentioned other classes involving psykers so I’d think she want to find out if a better rounded build is better to start off or if it is worth trying to rush straight for psychic. If I was her, I would think I had something else going on besides what is on her current status sheet. Some sense stopped her from shooting at the booby traps. High psychic stats? An ability not yet unlocked?

The passage was pretty good! I eagerly look forward to the next chapter!

Like most people have said, it reads well to me. Since she is part of Alpha and all ready gets some perks, like the extras in the room. Why not have someone to ask system question as part of that, even tho they want everyone else to have a shot at the squad, the military wouldnt want to waste the potential of someone with silver abilities if they dont even have enough for a full squad normally as what was said in an earlier chapter.

Mostly reads well. But I would have expected her thoughts about Dexterity (which actually might be better called agility? Dexterity is more skill in tasks, especially with the hands, while agility is more speed and ease of movement? Though of course D&D and similar games have made Dexterity kinda the go-to there so understandable) to include mention of how she can't keep up with her own perception/instincts like in chapter 7 ""Ahhh, don't worry! I'm sure I'll figure something out… To answer your questions from earlier: Yes, I actually dodged the bullet. As I mentioned before, I got lucky. I have some extremely good instincts and although my reflexes are good, they can't really keep up, most of the time."" So it seems she'd want to improve her dexterity to make it so she can actually keep up with her instincts and be able to make full use of them.

Reads well for me. Even makes sense she’s meticulous due to her gaming and electronics history.

The only thing that sticks out is "shore up" in that last sentence, sounds off to me because "shore up" usually pertains to a physical object like shoring up a wall. rest of it reads nicely

As to feedback. I am going to echo Thomas. Currently there is zero time pressure to allocate stats. I do not see someone of her caliber making an uniformed decision. The professor did say he was open for drinking consultation.

Put up a discord linked to the Patreon for passage feedback. While still not great Discord U.I. is way better than Patreon for discourse.

The passage was written well, but as others pointed out Thea is likely to be thinking about her end game build as much as she can, as well as details on the whys of the system so she can manipulate/exploit it. If she was as pro gamer as she claims to be she would likely be asking lots of detailed questions to those with more knowledge to look for ways to exploit the system. Most professional level players know at least a few mechanical exploits that weren't actually intended by the developer and I expect Thea would be on the lookout for those. Also Thea should probably be considering what skills will allow her to go unnoticed by the enemy (those using natural perception and perhaps psykers with detection abilities as well) as an alternative to making herself tankier as the base 2 in vitality will make that harder to begin with. If we think back to the trial simulation she was able to make such a big impact because her squad took the bullets for her, but if she has the ability to go unnoticed then less of her squad would have suffered. On a similar note, I'd think her build will have a heavy focus on perception, dexterity, and speed to make her impossible to hit rather than able to survive a hit. Even if her vitality is 2, if she is fast enough to dodge bullets/shrapnel and out run explosions and other AoE weapons then it won't matter

If the road of not finished chapters, we know you primarily release platform is RR so if there is major alterations to a chapter that effects the direction of the story, can you give us a heads up of which chapters have been altered so we can go back and reread. Such as in an authors note in the next released chapter.

first off the passage reads good to me and definitely makes sense I don't see any changes that would need to be made to it secondly I'd like to say I've come up with a theory that keeps making more and more sense the farther I keep reading and that's that the mid world's aren't there by accident or government neglect they're quite purposeful and serve to help the government. how did I come up with this its simple their overview of the system and just the complete purposeful neglect of mid world's leads to me to think they are left to rot to overall reduce to base human avg strength to make it easier for core and inner world's to join the military as you stated marines need 1.5x the human avg to join nothing like some good old neglect and rot to help reduce to human base avg so the inner world's and core world's can join the system easier it also makes sense in the point that they basically don't recruit from mid world's either so the mid world's have nothing to push them to be better or work harder while the inner world's are taken care of and have a reason to work towards bettering themselves. so it overall feels like purposeful government neglect especially since they can lit print stuff out of thin air

The first two sentences were a bit jarring but it flowed smoothly afterwards. I know the jarring aspect should be fine once the preceeding context gets filled in but without it they are a little out of place. The rest of it is good as far as stat planning goes but as TyrAurelius said they don't go as far into meta planning as I'd expect Thea to, although that could easily build out as she gets more introspective about her options. Especially if she hasn't yet found out how unusual her level/skills are.

I feel like that passage is a bit awkward. Thea is set up to be pretty smart, but that passage is very surface-level thinking about the implications of her stat build. I would expect Thea to think about builds like she would for a video game and seriously hem and haw over the pro cons to create a "perfect build". Should I min-max or is it important to be more balanced? Vitality, Focus, Resolve, and Perception all seem to be important for the Psyker build, but I will need Dexterity and Perception for the scout/sniper build. That makes perception a no-brainer but what else should I focus on? Do I want to be a scout or psyker in the long-run?

As for the content of the passage, it reads easy and makes sense. It's definitely something someone would be contemplating. As to my personal preference on passages, instead of giving us snippets of passages to review separately, maybe place the passages you're concerned about in brackets in the text so we know specifically what you're asking advice about?

Passage feedback: it reads fine for me, her thoughts are clear, meaningful and reasonable. No fix needed in my opinion. … Out pof - passage comment: short passages like this will not allow to spot logic bugs or detect a wrong “vibe”