70s Christian Exploitation Double Feature Movie Night (Premium E337)

I went to a Catholic school in the liberal Bay area and literally all we were taught (by the bro-ish gym teacher, no less) was about STDs. We split into groups and all had to do a presentation on a specific disease. Didn't even learn how to put a condom on, which genuinely caused me issues later in life.

There's gotta be at least one repressed Christian housewife who developed a communist fetish from this

I think half my reason for listening to this show is just to hear Jake say "well done. You've found a way to connect to the Internet," at the beginning

At least the 4th time Jake has mentioned his sex ed gym teacher on the pod. If only Julian were there

God! DAMN IT Jake! Omg you were so close! You're talking about "I Wish We'd All Been Ready" and how it's a banger and you shortly discuss the 10/10 that is HBO's The Leftovers, but you DIDNT MENTION that the leftovers uses the Good News Circle version of that song in the doomsday cult bottleish scene at the beginning of season 3!!! Love you buddy, keep ranting the good rant.

I actually did ride in a helicopter at the Georgia state fair.

I took his “I’m a lover not a Christian” response as I don’t cum inside like a Christian would

Jesus and his twelve opossums

I had to see theif in the night as a kid and it left me paranoid for years

I'm behind, but I definitely saw the interior ejaculation video. I'm pretty sure I saw it in 7th grade. Lol

My high school in Washington had a notorious STD slideshow you had to watch in 9th grade health class, but we also learned about IPV, birth control methods, and substance abuse, among other things. This was in the 2000s. This is why safe sex is so important (because god forbid I get gonorrhea in my eye!)

If Fidel Castro was Christ, it would explain a lot about the CIA assassinations. They were all successful but he'd just rise from the grave three days later and smoke a cigar

Should have had Josh Boreman on to discuss Orman

Footmen!! I absolutely LOVE this ridiculous freak of a movie. I even made a little cut-up compilation thingy out of it. It features the song "Christianity is stupid" by Negativland, where they've sampled Estus Pirkle. (I sent the video to the Negativland guys and they liked it!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3x57B5ZMiw

You guys never heard of helicopter rides at the fair? I guess you're not from rural Pennsylvania. LOL

As soon as I heard the four drum beats, I knew we’d be treated to a rendition of El Scorcho. 2nd reference to this song in two weeks, hell yeah

That tune is a banger. Sounds like it was performed by the Manson family

Jack is such a gem

I’m surprised nobody picked up on the Westworld reference in the helicopter scene from A Thief in the Night. The films came out the same year, they even reference it in the “nothing could possib-lye go wrong” bit from the Itchy & Scratchy Land episode of The Simpsons.

I was pretty mirror-avoidant after seeing the original Candyman in the cinema

William Friedkin didn't direct The Ninth Configuration or Exorcist III / Legion, those were written and directed by William Peter Blatty, the right wing Christian nut who wrote the novel the Exorcist is based on as well as the screenplay for the film. Ninth Configuration features the astronaut character from The Exorcist, and of course III/Legion is a followup to the first film. Ninth Configuration is kind of intriguing but sort of annoying, Exorcist III is where Blatty's talents as a director and screenwriter really shine, great film, very stylish and perfectly horrifically neurotic and nuanced coming from the pen of a believer

In the 1970 book "The Late Great Planet Earth" said the locusts described in Revelations were actually modern helicopters! You should review the book

I’m obsessed with Christian movies and the right wing call to action at the end of them is one of my favorite thing about them. The football Christian movie “Average Joe” (2024) ends with Willie Robertson (Duck Dynasty) explaining the 1971 religious freedom Supreme Court case Lemon v. Kurtzman.

Someone should tell Jake that they used “I wish we’d all Been Ready” in The Leftovers. https://youtu.be/-vQgcxD9JWQ?si=SY1z3JZY2DDVyT_W

To clear some things up for Jake: All Catholics are Christian, but not all Christians are Catholic. Catholics, Eastern Orthodox, Anglicans, and Lutherans are generally the only denominations that believe that Communion wine is literally (or something close to it) the blood of Christ. Most Protestant sects rarely, if ever, have communion. Denominations that do have communion require that the individuals receiving at least be baptized first. Catholics and Eastern Orthodox require a person to jump through more hoops before receiving.

Caught a stray when Larry Norman's 'I Wish We'd All Been Ready' came on. My dad used to play the hell out of that album on sunday mornings instead of going to church. Felt weird realizing I knew every word out of the blue.

Just wanted to reassure Jack that I had the exact same sex ed in western PA in the 90’s

The Exotic Ones was mentioned, so I have to bring up the fact that Swamp Thing was played by the physically quite large rockabilly/country singer Sleepy LaBeef

Our yearly fair has helicopter rides

The main song sounds like a Low B-Side.

I’ve missed QA, all you guys! Great stuff as always 😎

You should do a Larry Norman deep dive. He was the father of Christian Rock, and a really interesting iconoclast who had a much bigger influence on mainstream rock musicians than you would expect.

Movie with a good chunk set in heaven: Powell and Pressburger's "A Matter of Life and Death." They make the unusual choice of filming the Earth scenes in the most beautiful Technicolor imaginable (there's even a meta joke about it) and heaven in very striking black and white.

Even in public high school in non-rural MN (class of 2016) it was still abstinence only sex ed with the STD pictures. An old man guest speaker gave us “I’m worth waiting for” buttons after a speech about how having sex diminishes the value of our love

There's a 4th movie: The Prodigal Planet (1983)

That sound track with the cobra guy is 100% from Monty python and the holy grail.

the musical bit toward the beginning of thief in the night goes so fucking hard, that recording genuinely whips

Are you sure you aren’t misremembering the ending scene in Enter The Void where we were graced with that scarring POV ejaculation scene? 😅

Me again… Western Evangelicals would see Jesus’ blood shed on the cross as taking on “death’s sting” which is eternity in hell. If we accept Jesus’ blood (metaphorically), with its eternal hell antibodies, then we will live. I can see this being a banger of an analogy, just like the analogy of chewed gum or used tape when it comes to a female’s virginity.

The helicopter turning into a locust might be connected to the 5th trumpet in Revolution. I was taught in my 1990’s SBC that the “locust” described in Revelation 9 were actually helicopters but John didn’t have a word for what he saw in his vision from God since helicopters had not been invented. “Fifth Trumpet: The Locusts from the Bottomless Pit (Revolution 9) 9 Then the fifth angel sounded: And I saw a star fallen from heaven to the earth. To him was given the key to the [a]bottomless pit. 2 And he opened the bottomless pit, and smoke arose out of the pit like the smoke of a great furnace. So the sun and the air were darkened because of the smoke of the pit. 3 Then out of the smoke locusts came upon the earth. And to them was given power, as the scorpions of the earth have power. 4 They were commanded not to harm the grass of the earth, or any green thing, or any tree, but only those men who do not have the seal of God on their foreheads. 5 And [b]they were not given authority to kill them, but to torment them for five months. Their torment was like the torment of a scorpion when it strikes a man. 6 In those days men will seek death and will not find it; they will desire to die, and death will flee from them. 7 The shape of the locusts was like horses prepared for battle. On their heads were crowns of something like gold, and their faces were like the faces of men. 8 They had hair like women’s hair, and their teeth were like lions’ teeth. 9 And they had breastplates like breastplates of iron, and the sound of their wings was like the sound of chariots with many horses running into battle. 10 They had tails like scorpions, and there were stings in their tails. Their power was to hurt men five months. 11 And they had as king over them the angel of the bottomless pit, whose name in Hebrew is [c]Abaddon, but in Greek he has the name [d]Apollyon. 12 One woe is past. Behold, still two more woes are coming after these things.” Good times 😶🫠

Did anyone have this question asked of them at church camp? “If you had a gun to your head and were asked to step on a picture of Jesus or die, what would you do?” Now I realize the Boomers who asked this might have watched this film 😶🫠

That song...flashback! I had forgotten that song entirely, but our teen youth group definitely sang that song, and when you played it, I remembered every fucking word! No wonder I can't learn new stuff. My memory is jammed full of church song lyrics

Jake got shown Gaspar Noé's Enter The Void in sex-ed !

“I wish we’d all been ready” is such a banger tho

Honestly I think “Thief in the Night” should only ever be listened to as an audio track. Those music stings 🧑‍🍳😘

"A Matter of Life and Death" also features heaven, btw. That's a classy reference.

"The seven erotic zones of women" sounds like an old misogynistic joke where one of them is Cartier.

Audacious to include gun violence against congregations in the time when the fascists in multiple south american countries were torturing and slaughtering church workers.

Also why is her dead mom like 94 years old?

67% chance of Jesus over this weekend, uhhh

I ABSOLUTELY remember that POV video from sex ed where where the camera was in that vagine and you see the dick head come in and ejaculate. I was in 9th grade health. CRAZY.

He sounds like he’s trying to do both kinds of Georgia accent at the same time

Jake just had to throw that El Scorcho in

Omg I watched that entire movie. So much ketchup. Made me want a hot dog and a lobotomy. Killer eyeshadow tho

Honestly, growing up with these theological beliefs makes watching Trump and what he is doing extra insane. Especially as the people who are so into him should be possibly seeing the signs. A plot twist like no other.

These are so much better than avid A. R. White films... But the ending to "God is Not Dead" is amazingly funny...

Next time around you should do their follow-up: "The Burning Hell"...

Fwiw, the snake antivenom thing is real. They used to produce antibodies (and antivenom) by drawing blood from horses who were challenged with a toxin or pathogen. There's also A Guy who was bitten 200 times and his blood has been studied to produce a highly effective antivenom (article from BBC) 'Unparalleled' snake antivenom made from man bitten 200 times https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cr5d0l7el36o

we gotta get Jake the wikipedia article on catholics

I suggest Cross and the Switchblade starring Pat Boone and Erik Estrada. It’s a masterpiece and very watchable in a hideous way. And you get to see Erik in his underwear. It brought the gay out in many of us.

I Wish We'd All Been Ready was written by Larry Norman, who wrote and performed a lot of great songs. "Why don't you look into Jesus" is another great as well as "why should the devil have all the good music" (guess he had a lot of questions).

Hell, yeah.

Hell yeah. I had the all dogs go to heaven Burger King toys 👌

The cinema snob did an episode on "footmen" and a few other este perkle bangers they're wild af

Back in the day? I love my dynamo, still have it!!

That musical part they've starting putting during more serious parts is a great mood setter. I think it originated from Spectral Voyager 2? Also, glad to hear more Jack

You can in fact pay for a helicopter ride at the Illinois state fair or at least you could like ten years ago

Very coincidentally I was talking about both these movies earlier today to some old schoolfriends. We were shown A Thief In The Night (and the rest of the series) in school in the early 00s. (Footmen was a more recent discovery.)

A crossover with God Awful Movies!

I really dig Jack a lot. Good pick up y'all.

More QAA and super structure?? Let's go!

YAY YAY YAY two of my hyperfix-hate-tion films! This is very exciting, thank you.

I recommended Horsemen years ago (as I'm sure several others did) so I'm psyched to finally hear your takes on it.