EARLY EPISODE: The Battle of Carrhae
Crassus attempts to go to war to build his own resume. He ignores everyone's advice and marches his legions into the most predictable defeat on earth.
Plutarch. Crassus.
Mary T. Boatwright. The Romans: From Village to Empire
Roman-Persian Wars: The Battle of Carrhae
Comments (29)
Robert Evans once called Crassus "the Roman Elon Musk" and this episode just cements this thought into my brain even more.
As of typing, this comment holds up.
'Dipping your enemy's head in gold' sounds like it should be a euphemism for something...
'that's why I make sure I don't do a better job than my cohost, so that I don't get murdered' Hey Joe.... where's Nick?
Can't believe you left out the part where the envoy insulted Crassus by saying the Romans jerk off too much and the joke flew right over his dumb, rich head.
Look, I pay for high quality digressions. Without Nate's ADHD, we would never have had 20 minutes of 'pick-up truck brands are gay' chat on Trashfuture.
only 8 mins of banter boys! Still love it I come for the knowledge, Stayed and subscribed for the banter!
Fun fact for Tom: in farsi shish just means "six" because there's supposed to be six pieces of meat on your kebab. So Giuseppe would have just been a yek kebab.
Happy to hear from you Joe!
Finally! The Zapp Brannigan defense gets a hard counter!
Regarding Romans in China: the Chinese were perfectly capable of inventing formations very similar to the Romans on their own. It's a very 19th century racism thing to assume everything was invented in Europe.
I guess the whole pour gold down the throat of the severed head thing is the old time equivalent of those guys on youtube that do aluminum casting of anthills.
Roman Ass beating is my new erotic fiction set in a very wet bathhouse
That is not really an explanation. It is just a statement without factual substantiation.
"Libertarians" in America have a tendency to be at best fellow travelers and useful idiots for fascists and other far right ideologies, and at worst just a euphemism for them. They tend to be entirety disinterested in protecting the civil rights of ordinary individuals, in favor of removing the rights of workers and any other law that might prevent exploitation or abuse of the poor by corporations and the wealthy. They say they want small government, but they're still perfectly willing to pour money into the military, so long as none is used to help people in need. They're fully supportive of a police state so long as it's keeping down their "lessers" and only oppose it when it's preventing them from hurting others (i.e. the age of consent thing). When they talk abiut "liberty," they mean the same thing that the segregationist South meant when it said "states' rights": "I'M allowed do anything I want... to you. YOU'RE not allowed to do anything to me."
Love the program but don't quite understand the anti-libertarian position. Maybe an explanation is in order?
Libertarians are idiots, and the show is notably biased against idiots.
Speaking of toilets, our downstairs neighbors told our landlord that there was some sort of leak... turns out our toilet needed to be replaced. Then we had to wait for the plumber to special order a toilet because our bathroom is tiny and weird so the toilet was smaller than usual and crammed in a corner between a wall and the sink.
May Elon Musk be the Crassus of our time
Here here!
HYPE
One of my favorite stories to tell people who think history is boring. This shit is hilarious. Can't wait to listen.
Yes.
Is it really the donkcast if Joe isn’t congratulating himself on segues after talking about something completely unrelated for 10 minutes?
Oh yes excellent choice for an episode, Crassus proved to be one of Romes best donkeys in this campaign
Strong in the wrong, Crassus is he?
Parthian shots for everybody
You've ruined my pants Joe
If the intro song isn't Gold by Spandau Ballet I ain't listening