On art, burnout and fear
Hey y'all so this will be maybe a lengthy post, not sure as I'm just going to type it as I think and we'll see what happens. So apologies for any rambling or weird sentences.
First things first, the sci-fi print isn't happening. Now this doesn't mean that I won't still be making art for a print for March (and no April as well) it just won't be sci-fi themed. There are a few reasons for this but the main one honestly is that I scrapped 5 ideas at different stages of completion because I hated them and it was causing me excess stress and anxiety that really I just don't need right now. Now what this means for the Patreon and the folks who are at the print tier, you will be getting prints still, no worries. They are just a little delayed but what will most likely happen is you will get a package with multiple prints instead of individual for March and April. They will all go out together once the art is done and I can actually get the prints made. Apologies.
Now onto art and posting and what this Patreon is. I had big plans and a lot of ideas and I still do! But I am suuuuuper burnt out on a lot of things right now and it's hard drawing if it isn't for work (day job) or commissions. But I still am, it's just really slow. For example the image attached at the top of this post. That is a preview of a WIP that will be March's replacement print for the sci-fi topic. It is my own character and just something that I can sort of chill out with, noodling all the little foliage and things. So this all said I know posts maybe haven't been as frequent as I would like here and that's 100% on me. But without things to share it's hard to actually make a post haha. But it is what it is. I don't have a set schedule on Patreon but always tried to post at least a couple things a week. This doesn't seem like much but as the person who actually has to make the content that is hopefully meaningful enough to warrant said posts consistently when everything is seemingly crumbling it's a little daunting. But again, that's on me.
Now about this I am going to tell you right now that I won't promise anything but that my intention is to make one post a week. A general art update/check in with how projects/things are going and where we're at with the print art as I work through it. If this isn't great and folks don't feel as if they are getting their patron money's worth I completely understand if you have to back out. No hard feelings obviously. But I'd hope that if you still like my work, are able to and choose to that you'll keep supporting. Or if Patreon isn't your thing, check the shop out. As the world spins, things change and gigs get canceled I'm scooping up as much commission work as I can to make sure my bills stay paid so a lot of what I post will probably be looks into those commissions and how I do stuff. As always if you have questions or anything you can always shoot me a message or ask in the comments and I'll do my best to answer.
In regards to fear. I have had a pretty slow but consistent building of anxiety for the past couple months and it has honestly crippled me creatively. I am very lethargic in terms of thinking about drawing and the idea of drawing makes me anxious and then when sketches aren't working or a design isn't working or I missed out on a project or whatever that just adds to this notion of not good enough and failure and stress and it all just compounds until I just put things down and don't draw at all. This sucks. And I hate it haha. I love drawing and creating characters and art for you folks and everyone who follows my work. I have characters I want to share and stories I'd love to get out there so I can't let these feelings own me. But at the same time I am very much aware that it isn't mentally great to just plow through and continue when I'm just making mediocre work and further hating myself for it. So what I will say to you I guess to sort of end this long, rambling post is that I may slow down a bit to catch my creative breath but I will keep drawing. I truly appreciate all the support I receive from you all and my artist peers who I chat with online from time to time (who are always great about sharing info and just generally helping each other mellow out) Thank you all, and as always, be excellent to each other.
- Teeg
P.S. here's some recent art just so this post isn't basically only words.
P.P.S. Check out my new manga inspired t shirt collection <3