D&D Court: Bonus Cases - The Smeg

Can’t wait for the Phoebe bridgers dnd album I hear she’s coming out with music soon

I'm reading the comments cuz i thought i was crazy in thinking the girlfriend is right.

I also had no idea what a smeg was.

Used to work at a concert venue, can confirm that Phoebe Bridgers did indeed have a smeg during her time in our green room lol

This is multiple years late but the rogue should’ve been dead, cuz it should’ve been a con save and not a dex save

joke: wanna know how i got this scar? ... i fell off my bike

Smeg

I so desperately want to see grog of substantial whimsy utilized in a campaign, deck of many things but drink form

22:48 crossover episode

the whole time they were saying phoebe bridgers my mind was saying phoebe buffay and it took me longer than i’m willing to admit to realize i was off

My coworker is constantly throwing up balloons in serious meetings and can’t figure out how to turn it off

I'm coming back onto naddpod after taking a year off for financial reasons. Hearing Smeg so much in this episode is so offputting because of the slang "smeg" referring to 'smegma' ie dick cheese. I've obviously heard of the expensive kitchen appliance brand but it's always gonna be dick cheese to my mind.

"Orber me a Smeg"

I never felt so out of touch. I'd never heard of Phoebe Bridgers before this, and apparently she's "one of the biggest artists" or whatever. I probably need to touch grass or something. *sigh*

I thought Emily was exaggerating with the Fiat Smeg but they really weren't

Phoebe actually does have smeg lyrics: “Someday, I’m gonna look up from my smeg and see my life”

Hi, delayed weirdo here. I literally had to make a spreadsheet to make sure the math worked out on the D100 confessional. Only then did I remembered that you don’t roll a 0 on a D100. From a statistical point of view she’s in the clear and using the same probability as the rest of us. 🎲 👍

Suddenly desperate for the boygenius dnd album

Just here to say the girlfriend is right. I am throwing my comment in the pot in support. The die with two numbers dictates the tens place and the die with one number dictates the ones place, though when its a ten you just add it to the already existing tens place number. You're not supposed to be able to roll a zero, that's why all the tables start at 1.

Defenestrate your Smeg dice!

Love the episode as always. What the hell is a smeg??

I feel I would have narrated the Rouge based on their class as being a Phantom they would have connections to the dead, thus the narration would be like: you, see in bullet time the expanse of a light, brighter than you've ever seen. You watch as all color in your skin fades to an eerie grey. Your breath goes silent, infact you don't even feel your breath, as your eyes gaze up at a figure in front of you looms with sunken eyes their faces changes to all those close to you all at once, those of which have died. You hear in all of their voices ringing with the hollowness of a church "what have you done? " you Blink as time has passed, your spirit returns to your husk as you have evaded the explosion, yet you feel different, hollow like a piece was ripped from your soul. Your eyes take minutes to focus again, but the rotting stench of decay and destruction overwhelms your senses, as sight returns, you see nothing but leveled ground. You have never felt this alone in all your life.

It sounds like the girlfriend is rolling the dice 100 correctly, no? It’s from 1 to 100 and dice aren’t meant to roll 0 which is what can happen if you do it the other way. Am I crazy?

If you listen to LegendLark (formerly Dames & Dragons) there’s an episode where two players play NPC Demons summoned by a PC!! It’s so fun exactly what Emily was saying

this is unhinged. these are all so clearcut. how are people so crazy

I SUPPORT THE CRUSADER SMEG

WHY IS THE GRINCH HOT, O JUST DROPPED ACID

I had some balloons pop up in zoom in a therapy session 😂😂 turns out it’s an apple setting

You guys gotta read the reviews of the Dolce Gabanna SMEG

phoebe bridgers and dnd? need 1000 more hours of this lmao

the girlfriend is absolutely rolling d100s correctly.

hey caldwell can you do me a HUGE favor and not refer to trinyvale in the past tense? i don’t have the mental health or emotional maturity to accept it’s completely done.

Does no one watch Red Dwarf and know that Smeg is an insult? Smeg head! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQ-S6SiLhrs

I am hammering my 95 theses to the dice church door, that is how rolling a percentile dice works

Would legitimately love a mixed bag or smth with lvl 2 characters and a ton of legendary items

Girlfriend is shifting the way we count 00 on the 10's place to the 0 on the one's place. I *get* it, but it's ugly as hell and I don't like it.

This is a thick, Smeggy grinch-hole of a 'sode.

how did they not say pheobe fridges? (they may have and i missed idk, but it was right there)

Timothy Chalmette is gonna be the Onceler in the live action lorax. You can't tell me I'm wrong.

I’m glad so many others agree with the girlfriend. The RAR method is inconsistent and weird. 00+1 = 1 00+0 = oh obviously that’s 100(??) The 0 on the d10 is a 10 in regular play (try telling a fighter he just rolled a “0” on his damage die), so why change it for the percentile dice? Not to mention d10s sometimes literally have a “10” instead of a 0. Try explaining to someone who just rolled “90+10” that they just got 90. It’s insane. INSANE.

Did anybody else notice a weird 5 second of just silence during the judge intros

murph hasnt listened to anything like critical ditto. The players getting to roleplaying villans can be very fun

phoebe bridgers mentioned on naddpod this episode was made for me

The great schism of the d100

To be perfectly fair I wouldn't have suspected anything about the balloons if Murph hadn't said anything

This is an inquisition.

I looked up the price of a smeg, and they're 3k?????

The girlfriend is actually the one rolling the d100 correctly

Smeg-free 2023 but I’m dreaming of a Smeg-more 2024

There was a hot Grinch on tiktok but I think he got dmca'd lol 🥲

The DM with the reroll for acrobatics must really love Prince of Persia: Sands of Time.

I think Emily’s description of “little glasses; high pants” for Dwight is an amalgamation between Dwight and Urkel.

Lol uh, is that not how percentile dice work? With the confession? Thats how ive been doing it this whole time lol

I've never played dnd but you guys are my fav podcast. I'm in like the top 10% on Spotify

Just added the jousting paladin fridge to my online Christmas wishlist. Can't wait for my husband to check it and react.

The Smeg of many things is great but consider: The Deck of Many Smegs

MUNA’s podcast is a headgum podcast. You can for sure get this phoebe bridgers/boygenius dnd ambiance album going

Phoebe Bridgers mentioned!! Let’s goo!!

Jake ruined my blue year

I think Emily was thinking of Steve Urkel. High pants and small glasses!

All I hear is smegma everytime lol

I have a Smeg toaster and kettle. I feel seen

This one is for our Lawful Good boy Murph https://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/smeg-jousting-paladins-dolce-and-gabbana-refrigerator/?catalogId=79&sku=9420797&cm_ven=PLA&cm_cat=Google&cm_pla=Electrics%20%3E%20Refrigerators,%20Wine%20%26%20Beer%20Fridges&region_id=697020&cm_ite=9420797_14571727833&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAvdCrBhBREiwAX6-6UvJMjyqrFe3ZaCcxrOM3cr1QGETb2P8gsgTM_SIASFFMdYzJiGhHThoCBdsQAvD_BwE

As a brit, who grew up watching red dwarf, I just cannot hear smeg as anything else.

Here's the fiat fridge mentioned, if anyone else is as curious as I was - https://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/smeg-500-fiat-beverage-refrigerator/?pkey=cwine-beer-fridge

You just know the Dice Christ Inquisitor and their girlfriend they're condemning to eternal damnation have a really good relationship

Phoebe actually wrote Chinese Satellite about a Smeg that landed in her backyard

Wait, how does she roll at 1-9 then?

i’m so so sorry but when i hear “the smeg” in the context of a fridge all i can think of is the cum fridge from karina’s college

lol do you guys not know how rolling the d100 works?

og grinch not being credited as boris karloff is a tragedy when the other two were listed by the actor

I spilled my skin serum by accident because of how sidelined I was by "Smeg"

i need a photo of the court’s facial reactions to caldwell’s rendition of the office theme i bet it was choice

THANK YOU MURPH. I felt like Brennan in that neverafter scene u know the one "No, Stop. In reference to What???" [about the Smeg]

Pretty sure it’s confirmed across the board that a 0 and 00 on d100’s is 100. No further inquiry required, case closed.

Parallel Schrutiverse is insane

I think the losing bottom 10 levels of divine intervention is as to close to irl dice excommunication as you can get

Just get your girlfriend a D100 instead of using the 2d10s

Smeg is love, Smeg is life. ✌️ 🤘

Here’s that last fridge, read the reviews for a treat https://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/smeg-jousting-paladins-dolce-and-gabbana-refrigerator/?catalogId=79&sku=9420797&cm_ven=PLA&cm_cat=Google&cm_pla=Electrics%20%3E%20Refrigerators,%20Wine%20%26%20Beer%20Fridges&region_id=658780&cm_ite=9420797_14571727833&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiAmsurBhBvEiwA6e-WPPym7aukGemf4juH-sSaQQnRJEL9s2VKzkjfyU_9fernAHjoLDXdLxoC4tUQAvD_BwE

The fridge name is awful and the continuations of the talk of the fridge with its name was so off putting

7th!

Emily Schruteford

Just in time for my commute thank you murph

Smeg you very much!

Just read the title and yelled "NO!" out loud.