D&D Court: Nasty Bards, Evil Dads, and Mustard Custard
AD-FREE EPISODE FOR $5+ PATRONS!
Dungeon Court is back in session! Join Justices Murphy, Axford, and... Hurwitz (!?) as they convene to pass judgement on your trials at the table!
CREDITS:
Sound Mixing and Editing by Trevor Lyon
Dungeon Court Theme Song by Sam Weiller
Comments (98)
the caldwell impressions are so funny and sweet
The MTG case sounds like the DM didn't intend to go back to DnD lol
I love that Emily's dedication to bits even transcends into building MTG commander decks. I'm inspired by Lady Orca
It’s better to flip a bluray anyway since they’re scratch resistant
If you put a horse head in someone's bed to threaten them do you roll with the horse's intimidation?
Now I kinda want to learn to play Magic the gathering
Tiarat!
Maybe this is just me listening to this episode right after the campaign 0, but in this ep it really seemed like Justice Hurwitz stepped into his role and had some opinions! Love to see it.
Hey! Caldwell doesn't just say random things. He just A to Es. Really lateral thinking, free associating, jazz! "Look, a line of lighting through 10 ten tents, this is a war camp, they've probably raided nearby farms for rations. What if she were behind a cart of beets raided from a nearby farm? No one would see her if she were hiding behind a cart full of juicy beets. NO ONE WOULD SEE HER MURPH. {MURPH response} I DUNNO MAN, SHE COULD COVER HERSELF WITH THE BEET JUICE AND MAKE IT LOOK LIKE SHE WAS HURT TOO!"
I was in Austria ten years ago and I had a pork belly appetizer that had the most delicious and unusual mustard ice cream accompaniment thing and every time y’all said mustard custard I thought of that day lol.
But was it a chocolate-based custard?
Didn't think it was possible, but y'all are weirder sans Caldwell
I dont know what it is about bullspit that made me cry from laughing but it has fully entered my vocabulary
murph just saying "sure" when Emily said SantaHog made me cry laughing
The funniest thing Jake has ever said is "Hold your loved ones close and tell em they're pissing you off" lol
For the Lady Orca commander deck build- the One More Mana boys made a Lady Orca deck for their Shuffle Up & Play Jank Off.
In that first case the DM could have just said "yeah you punch right in the face" and not even call for damage, give the player a role moment... that attitude of cheeky rolling and stuff is just to punish players, and beside, you as a DM do not want to expose the lore you work hard on? I have bad memories of DMs that just work to punish players
Way back in the late 90s we used the NetRunner CCG as part of our CyberPunk 2020 campaign. It was indeed very rad, but also agreed upon by all parties.
Wild West space adventure? Firefly.
Caldwell’s presence is so strong in this ep still, amazing
If the deception check succeeds, then the enemy says "He's found us! We don't have much time." And now the rat king exists. Edit: I should have listened to the sentencing first.
What I usually do as to not get full initiative going again for something that isn't combat related outright, I'll just set a timer and have the players figure it out before time is up otherwise, consequences. Does it make them freak out and panic? Yes. Do they figure it out faster? Also yes. 😅😂
WTF?!?!? I thought we all agreed that Jake could Only be a justice in Boston. I guess I will listen anyways..
Even THAT license was revoked at some point!
Omg Justice Jake PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE play a character with a old west accent I was thrown by how good you’d sound as an old prospector or something And it’s been like 2 campaigns since Emily did moonshine, so I think it’s open season on someone else doing a twang again
I can’t wait to look for 1) mustard 2) custard and 3) a froyo machine in the Wild West 🫡 Thank you, Justices!!!
I would think from the sound of the Rat animal messenger thing the DM rolled the intimidation without saying it was gonna be roll at all
Really want some Hoglidays and Hogfather cross over... RIP Terry Pratchett.
I love Murphs increasing hatred for the socials at the end
tiarat
Blue Rat Head does cold rat damage
Big fan of Murph ceasing to ever mention Twitter.
came to say this! Very happy
The Caldwell bits are gold
They definitely meant fire bolt, not lightning bolt familiar with can't even use lightning bolt
I really need murph and Emily to be made aware of the podcast Who Killed Avril Levine if they aren't already.
As a patreon supporter I would love a mixed bag where the gang played Magic the Gathering
Hey Boobs! I was wondering, will anymore music from this campaign/prior campaigns be released to Spotify in the future? Emily was my number one artist in my Spotify Wrapped, because I use all her music for my dnd games every week! I’d love to use music from, say, the Hells chapter of campaign one or The Beastlands. No Presh ofc!
Between this and the Critical Role MTG episode I’ve learned so much about Lady Orca
I love it when people are so confident that the court will rule in their favour then they describe themselves doing something absolutely bizarre. CC: the submitter who thought they should get a surprise round for the whole party because they attacked half the enemy camp.
To be fair, neither the submitter or the court discussed the actual rules for surprise. You would all roll initiative for sure, and then the dm would determine who (if anyone) in the camp is surprised. A "surprise round" isn't a real thing.
Awwww you guys really miss Hugh
Alright what’s it going to take to do some magic streams against some Patreon lasses and lads
Maybe I’m just emotional today but the gang doing Caldwell bits while he is away made me tear up a little. It’s the most wholesome razzing.
Santa Hog …
When Cladwell comes back you all should play this episode for him, but pause before Murph gives the Caldwell take and see how close Caldwells real reply would have been 😅
I would have gone Mars Attacks mode if I was some future version sucked into the wild west past. The 1st town left with one survivor to explain how their fellow townsfolks were melted would have butterfly effected us out of existence, but totally worth the mayhem due to a dull DM.
The funniest thing about the distraction cast is I'm pretty sure you can't cast Lightning Bolt through a familiar since it's not a Touch spell.
There’s a class or regular feat that allows for this iirc
Foppish Dweeb right out of the gate is pretty hilarious
*Tiarat
Cheekiness is not akin to subtlety. I disagree that you can't be cheeky and obvious.
I'd almost say the point of cheekiness is being noticed doing something un expected but blatant in a playful way.
"actually we're playing pickleball" wow for sure the closest listening to naddpod has come to having a conversation with my parents
I must disagree with the first case. Rolling for initiative for every little thing would slow the game way down. It's on the cleric to call out nonlethal damage, and if they did not it's on them to make haste to heal, they know how the game works. If you punch someone to zero, and then don't immediately heal them, that's a fuck around and find out moment.
It can be hard to call out an organized action/train of thought if several people are loudly talking or arguing at the same time. Turns in combat can take over a minute to process and resolve what to do, yet we buy the conceit that it's only six seconds in-game, and that's without layered talking. It's reasonable to have a bit of that time courtesy extend outside of combat. It's also possible that the players aren't aware of or familiar with non-lethal damage. Regardless, there should be a way to handle the situation in a way that doesn't feel like getting "got" in a non-fun way.
S tier episode with a side of sad bc we miss our favorite Justice of Japes.
Worked at a tennis club for 3 years and they converted a good chunk of courts for pickleball. Can confirm the tennis vs pickleball player beef.
this episode featured some truly spot-on murph impressions
As someone who LOVES to play support I think I’d actually enjoy the crit curse
That first DM did nothing wrong. Sounds like he's asked his family to play magic before and they sadi no. Also if I know anything about Magic it's so hard to find a playgroup sometimes. Especially if you're shy and don't want to go to a FNM at a Game Shop. So instead of continuing to hound them he Met them on their level and played the game they wanted to play. And all he did was ask them for 1 session to meet him on his level and they decided they couldn't do it and that the game he cared about was nt worth their time. It's not as though he was asking them to become magic players just do one encounter with the magic cards. For the Judges to side against him on top of everything else is a severe breach of justice and I call for an appeal.
I’m from lower appellate crick court, and while they should have been open to trying it, it was an open and shut case of entrapment & misleading contract of conduct. Bad manners does not equal violating TTRPG law, I move to strike your appeal and to wish you a happy Hoglidays
I suspect the railroad dm was expecting the players to immediately start chasing down clues to get home, uncovering the time hopping villain and when that didnt happen now they are also stuck just living in a cowboy world they thought would last 2 sessions
Sadly the hours of fruitless role play were us looking for clues to get home 😭 Part of my conversation with the DM was to see if he intended us to stay in the cowboy world— he said he didn’t want to railroad us into either option ☹️
The phrase 'slinging mustard custard' is absolutely vile
The DM who is afraid to railroad is simply railroading the party into having a boring and bad time. And also weirdly railroading them into having to engage in the story in a super specific way by saying no to everything and having a storyline in mind with only “subtle” hints.
😭 Thank you!!! I feel so justified in my frustration/boredom 🫶🏻
It was great having that Justice Tanner energy channeled this episode. There is just slightly less chaos without him, and the Justices brought that extra spirit today 👌
Forced to swear Jake in? Truly these are dark times...
I can tell u guys really miss Caldwell this ep
Murph really railroaded me through this ep
Cheeky weekend at Bernie 's one shot?
… three days ago I decided to let my 11 (and a half!) year old start listening to campaign 1. We had a chat about words we shouldn’t say in school, and she’s now just about out of Moonstone. So. Uh. Bad parenting I guess.
MUSTAAAAAARRRRRRRRRD
Came here to add this, glad I wasn't the only one
On behalf of the entire town of Medford, MA, thank you
Hi Court, a Rat God has never been mentioned in my campaign at any point ever, up until the Animal Messenger plan, but I will take your suggestion and use a combined Tiamat-Tarraque stablock where they are tied together. They’re only level ten.
Tweet and Skeet (for some reason that's what posts on Bluesky are called) are pretty similar sounding.
They weren't called skeets until people were horrified at calling them skeets. A self fulfilling prophecy if you will.
had to google picketball tbh
Regarding the 1/20 curse. you could have a mechanic where on a 1/20, you roll a d2 or d4 to switch it? #flipthecrit
Tiarat
Thank you! They kept not saying it and I was going nuts!!
Pickleball mention! My 2 favorite things, Naddpod and pball!
There has been no escaping mustard on any platform for the past week. Lol
CUSSSSTAAAAARD!
Emily: oh no, *I'm* the Caldwell
We need bailiff tanner next episode!!!
#justiceforjake
I think this is the second time Jake has said the oath? double oathsworn?
But he was relieved of his duties when he chose to abstain twice and was forced to step down
Supreme Court justices don't exactly get hazed but the least senior justice does have to make the coffee
Justice Jake? JJ instead of BJ?
i know it’s the hoglidays but this is too far
What a big day for Justice Jack.
God bless Jake absolutely having the pledge locked and loaded
The baby has grown up
JUSTICE Hurwitz? I may have to abstain from this episode