V-Friday the end

The year has progressed. It’s Friday the 14th and it feels like February is over tomorrow. Time is so fast and still the best thing we have.

Things are working, but something feels off. Is it the urge to be better to growth more faster?

Is it the feeling of having so many beautiful things at once and not being able to be as grateful as you should be?

Who measures gratefulness? When is it enough and when too less?

Growing up I was a very happy child, but one day the feeling of not being "good" enough overgrew that desire of just being.

I wasn’t sure if I would ever be like the other kids. I felt different even though nobody would expect it. To the outside things seems great, some called it "perfect“. No matter what I did I didn’t feel like I was "enough“ no be lover, good enough to fulfill my dreams or strong enough to withhold any setbacks. People, teacher, circumstances seems against me.

I knew I had to change something. I wasn’t quite sure what it was and how to do it. I was blaming circumstance on the one hand, but also fighter harder to overcome negative events, miss r opportunities, broken homes, friends than ever. I wasn’t feeling myself. I wasn’t in touch with myself and the deepest desires. I wasn’t dreaming big, but actually not believing what I was dreaming about.

Now almost 7 years later, I know what I was messing and why nothing was working like I wished it would have.

I wasn’t loving myself. I wasn’t trusting my abilities to decide what’s right and wrong, whom to believe, what to follow and how to navigate the most daily decisions.

I realized it’s always you.

Bad circumstances can happen, but if you are looking for a black sheep you may always find one to blame. You can blame yourself or a person you appointed.

Loving yourself will open every door, you can paint in your memory and future.

So today is not just about loving others, but yourself first.

Thanks

Happy v day