Mushoku Tensei — Chapter 62 - Sylphiette — Tears Unshed

"You... are you Sylphiette?"

When someone called my name, my first reaction was fear. Or maybe anger.

After the teleportation, I'd been mistaken for a member of the Sperudia tribe so many times because of my hair color that I'd stopped giving my name to anyone. Except when I registered as an adventurer. You could count the people who knew it on one hand, maybe just a few staff at the Guild.

And I was wearing my hood.

I raised my head and glared at the man who had called out to me.

Then I stopped.

A familiar face. No, more than familiar. I knew him.

Rudeus's father. Paul Greyrat.

He looked startled. I pulled the glare back immediately.

"Is that... Uncle Paul?"

"Oh! It really is you!" He broke into a grin. "I kept hearing about a green-haired Voiceless Casting mage in this area, and my first thought was whether it might be you. The only Voiceless Casting mages I know are my son and you — that's the whole list."

He smiled exactly the way I remembered. Easy, warm, like nothing in the world could weigh him down.

Something loosened in my chest.

"Long time no see." I hesitated. "Uncle Paul... do you have any information about my family?"

---

My encounter with Uncle Paul had happened in the Shirone Kingdom. Getting back to Fittoa Territory would still take time.

Partly because I'd wasted so much of it right after the teleportation, panicked, completely at a loss, stumbling through days I barely remembered. It wasn't until a year ago that I'd finally steadied myself and started earning travel funds through adventurer work.

When I asked about my family, Uncle Paul's expression shifted. He went quiet in a way that told me everything.

"You don't have to say it. I already know."

"Yeah."

He introduced me to the people behind him. All adventurers. One of them I recognized, or rather, I recognized her from one side only.

Roxy Migurdia. Rudeus had mentioned her constantly. His most respected teacher.

Out of politeness, I lowered my hood.

"I'm Sylphiette. Nice to meet you all."

Uncle Paul's expression didn't change. The rest of the party looked somewhat surprised. Roxy's reaction was the strongest, and it looked almost like fear, which I didn't understand.

The golden-haired elf, Elinalise Dragonroad, had a different kind of surprise on her face entirely.

I set it aside. This wasn't the time to study anyone's reactions.

My family was gone. Was there even any reason to go back...?

Then it hit me.

This was Uncle Paul's adventurer party. There was no way Rudeus wasn't in it.

"Uncle Paul... Rudeus, is he..."

Please. Not what I'm thinking.

I have nothing left.

"Oh, Rudeus? He's on the Central Continent right now."

The breath I'd been holding came out all at once.

"Is that right... that's good."

He must have grown up by now. He had, seven years was a long time. I don't know why that thought surprised me.

Honestly. Get it together.

---

"Sylphiette, do you want to join our search party?"

"Search party...?"

"Well, it's more of an adventurer party at this point — the official search and rescue group was disbanded. Those damn nobles." Uncle Paul spat the last words like a curse.

"Alright. Though I should warn you, I'm not as capable as Rudeus — even if we're both Voiceless Casting mages..."

"Ha! There aren't many people more capable than my boy!"

The moment he said it, Elinalise elbowed him in the ribs.

Nobody argued the point, though. I wouldn't have either. And if anyone had tried to argue it, I would have argued back, because Rudeus really was that good.

He taught me everything I knew.

---

Over the next 2 months, I filled the role of the party's mage.

Piece by piece, I learned what had been happening. Uncle Paul and his group had already combed through the Milis Continent and the Central Continent. Rudeus had covered the entire Demon Continent on his own. What was left were the Bijankilt Kingdom and the Begaritt Continent.

He'd searched nearly the whole world for his family.

After talking it over, the group decided not to bring me to the Begaritt Continent. Instead, I would escort Norn and Aunt Lilia to the Central Continent to meet up with Rudeus.

I was looking forward to it. More than I probably should have been. It had been such a long time.

And I still had feelings for him.

"Sylphie, I'm leaving Miss Norn and Miss Lilia in your hands."

Roxy said it with an ease that still caught me off guard sometimes. When we'd first met, she'd been afraid of me. Now she talked to me like a friend.

It made sense, I supposed. She was the person Rudeus respected most. And her knowledge of magic had helped me more than I could say.

"Don't worry. I'll protect them with everything I have."

"I'd love to come with you, but the Begaritt Continent needs an experienced mage..."

"You've been to the Begaritt Continent? As expected of Rudeus's teacher."

The admiration was completely genuine. Roxy, however, looked like she'd rather not hear it.

She waved a hand, shaking her head.

"Rudeus's teacher... he's long since surpassed me. I don't deserve that title anymore."

She was smiling, but there was embarrassment underneath it. I didn't understand. A student surpassing their teacher wasn't shameful, it meant the teacher had done their job.

"Miss Roxy, Rudeus has said the person he respects most in the world is you. Please don't deny being his teacher. I think it would make him sad."

"Is that so... ah... well, I suppose..." She laughed, a little awkward. "Ha ha."

---

After that conversation, I went back to the inn to pack for the journey.

Honestly, those 2 months were the best since the teleportation.

No one looked at my hair and saw something wrong. When things got dangerous, they watched my back and trusted me to watch theirs. They let me stand beside them.

The feeling was strange. Warm. Like something I hadn't realized I was missing.

Before meeting them, I'd never traveled in a party. People were wary the moment they saw the green, nobody wanted to put the mage's support role in the hands of someone who might be Sperudia. I'd always worked alone.

I was fine alone. I told myself that every time.

But every night, I thanked Rudeus. For the Voiceless Casting. For teaching me which spells to use and when. Without that, I probably would have died on some solo commission long before now.

"Alright. Stop dwelling. Time to move."

---

The journey took half a year. When it ended, we were standing in the northern part of the Central Continent.

We went to the Adventurer's Guild and dropped Rudeus's name.

The woman at the desk blinked. Then she straightened up and gave us her full attention. Around us, the adventurers in the Guild started murmuring.

Just his name. That was all it took.

About half an hour later, Aisha arrived.

"Sister Sylphie, you must be exhausted from the trip."

I stared at her. I hadn't even taken my hood off, how had she recognized me?

And she still remembered me. It had been nearly 7 years.

"Let's head back for now," she said, "and wait for Brother to come home."

---

The house was large. Impressive. There were even two maids.

Rudeus. He'd gone further than I'd imagined.

After we washed up, Aisha, Norn, and Miss Lilia settled in the sitting room, talking about something. I didn't join them. I drifted to the window by the entrance and stood there, watching the street.

What would he look like now? Taller, probably. Older. Handsome, almost certainly, though that thought made me feel foolish.

Would he dislike my hair? He'd traveled the entire Demon Continent. He would have heard the stories. All the bad luck that followed green.

And what about the rest of me? Uncle Paul's wives were both... well. Rudeus was Paul's son. Would he,

The door.

Brownish-gold hair. Emerald eyes. And below his left eye, that mole. That familiar, unmistakable mark.

He's handsome. I knew it before the thought finished forming, and then I realized, that's not my imagination. He's actually there.

I was about to go open the door when I noticed the woman beside him.

Golden hair. A figure I couldn't help noticing. She and Rudeus were talking easily, comfortable with each other in a way that made my stomach tighten.

An adventuring companion. That's all.

I held onto that.

Then she kissed him on the cheek, smiled, and walked away.

Rudeus was outstanding. It made sense that women would be drawn to him.

This was normal.

This is normal.

I didn't go to the door.

Maybe it was how effortlessly beautiful that woman had been. Maybe it was simpler than that, I was just afraid of what his face might look like when he saw me.

I pulled my hood back up and walked to the sitting room.

"Sister Sylphie, you saw Brother?"

Norn looked up at me. I nodded.

"Why are you putting the hood back on?"

"I... I'm afraid he won't recognize me. And I'm afraid that if he does, he'll be disappointed."

"He would never, Brother—"

Rudeus walked through the door.

Up close, he really was handsome. Built solidly for a mage. And his bearing was the same as I remembered, composed, steady, serious.

He smiled for her. That thought surfaced before I could stop it. He smiled easily, in front of a woman like that, and I just,

He greeted them. The reunion played out around me. Then he looked over and went still.

Of course. The hood.

In the quiet, Norn was the one who spoke.

"Take... take off the hood. Brother won't forget. I promise."

I knew I was being ridiculous. I knew it. But I,

"Is that... Sylphie?"

His voice cut through everything.

Huh?

He remembered.

I lifted my hands and took off the hood. Slowly raised my head and looked at him.

No disgust. No disdain. None of what I had been bracing for.

What was in his eyes was something different.

Pity.

"Sylphie, your hair is still as beautiful as before."

I crossed the distance between us and wrapped my arms around him.

Pity, warmth, something else entirely, it didn't matter. I didn't care what it was.

As long as it wasn't disdain.

That night I stayed close to him and didn't let go, talking and leaning on him until I fell asleep on the sofa.

---

In the days that followed, Rudeus stopped adventuring.

He was home almost constantly, going out sometimes with Norn and Aisha to run errands, and occasionally bringing me along.

But what about the woman?

If she and Rudeus were involved, wouldn't she want to see him after all this time apart? Unless...

Unless they weren't together anymore.

I knew what kind of person that thought made me. I knew it was small and ugly. But I couldn't stop it.

I found Aisha.

"Brother's girlfriend? No, no, no~" She waved both hands.

"But I saw a woman kiss his cheek."

"Hmm? But Brother's fiancée is Sister Eris. So he really couldn't help himself around another woman after all?"

"Wait — Miss Eris?"

"Yeah. They got together 3 years ago." Aisha tilted her head. "...Okay. Here's what I'll do, when I get a moment alone with him, I'll ask for you!"

"Thank you, Aisha."

So. Miss Eris.

She had confessed to Rudeus the year he came back.

If it was Miss Eris, then... maybe that meant...

I could too.

Because we'd made a promise, Miss Eris and I. Back then. If Rudeus falls for you first, I'll tell you before I make my move. If he falls for me first, you tell me.

Those were her exact words.

A few years ago she hadn't been able to find me. But now I could find her. I could write.

No, wait. The real question was whether Rudeus even had feelings for me. If he didn't, it wouldn't matter what Miss Eris agreed to.

No, write to her first. Write to her first, and then make him fall for me.

---

2 days later, Aisha came back with an answer.

"That was some woman who'd been chasing Brother and couldn't get him, so she just grabbed him and kissed him~"

The relief that went through me was embarrassing.

Thank goodness.

Right. So. The next step was getting a letter to Miss Eris.

I waited for Rudeus to come back inside from the courtyard. When he did, I made sure I was smiling a little brighter than usual.

"How did it go? Did you finish talking with Aisha?"

"Mm. Thank you, Sylphie."

"Rudeus, don't be so formal with me."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Go ahead."

"Where is Miss Eris?"

"Ah... she went to train."

"Is she reachable?"

"Should be. Though I'm not sure she still remembers how to read..."

I almost laughed at that. "I see. I have something I want to tell her. Could I send her a letter?"

"Of course. She's at the Sword Sanctum, send it there and it should reach her."

"Thank you, Rudeus."

The Sword Sanctum.

Now I just had to make Rudeus fall for me.

➤ Next: Thoughts in the Heart