[TWD x Resident Evil] — Chapter 271 - Hermione, You Couldn't Possibly Be

After a long silence, Tony finally deflated. He leaned back into the sofa and shook his head with a rueful smile.

"Alright, Hermione. I thought between fighting aliens and dismantling Hydra, we'd had enough adventures to fill a book and made enough noise to shake the world. But now, hearing all this..."

He spread his hands. "It feels like we've been playing house."

Steve's expression shifted into something complicated. He looked at Hermione, a trace of disbelief in his eyes, but more than that, relief.

"The process sounds astonishing, but you came back safe. That matters more than anything else."

"Exactly!" Pepper nodded, crossing over to Hermione's side and gently taking her hand. Her voice was soft. "Seeing you here, in one piece — we can all breathe again."

The others murmured their agreement. The earlier shock was fading, replaced by warmth and something close to joy.

Everyone here was essentially part of Hermione's inner circle. The stronger she was, the more at ease they felt.

The room came alive again. Everyone talked at once, peppering Hermione with questions about the universe, the customs, the landscapes, the strange alien races and stunning galaxies she'd described. The curiosity was genuine and infectious.

As the conversation flowed, Tony's gaze drifted to Mjolnir, which Thor had left sitting casually on the table.

He leaned in. Reached out one finger and poked the ancient metal hammerhead.

"Hey, big guy." Tony turned toward Thor, who was in the middle of demonstrating something to Dr. Banner. "What's the actual principle behind this thing? Why can't anyone but you lift it? Is there some kind of biometric recognition system built in?"

Thor lowered his arm. A punchable grin spread across his face.

"Simple. Because none of you are worthy."

A chorus of boos.

"Ha! I knew you'd say that." Tony rolled his eyes. "Anyone can brag. 'Worthy,' makes it sound like some divine prophecy."

"It's not bragging." Seeing the unconvinced expressions all around, Thor's playful side kicked in. He patted Mjolnir with one hand. "If you don't believe me, try it yourselves. Whoever can lift this hammer shall possess the power of Thor, and, according to the laws of Asgard, shall be recognized as the rightful heir to the throne!"

Tony's eyes lit up instantly. He rubbed his hands together, a mischievous grin spreading across his face. "Rightful heir to the throne? Seriously? Then I absolutely have to try. When I'm King of Asgard, first order of business: reinstating prima nocta!"

"Tony!" Pepper glared at him, half-annoyed, half-laughing. She swatted his arm. "Little Hermione is right here! What on earth are you saying?!"

"Heh." Tony laughed sheepishly, then seemed to catch himself. He looked over at Hermione. "Actually, Pepper, wait — little Hermione is sixteen now. She's not the same kid who needed us looking after her. Back when I was sixteen..."

The back of his head received a sharp smack before he could finish the sentence.

"Shut it!" Pepper snapped.

Tony immediately tucked his chin in and went quiet, which drew a round of loud laughter from everyone else.

But the mention of age seemed to trigger something. Tony and Pepper glanced at each other, and in silent agreement, both turned to look at Hermione, wearing matching smiles that were equal parts nosy and genuinely caring. Classic elder energy.

"Speaking of which, Hermione," Pepper began, voice soft and deceptively casual, "at Hogwarts... have you met any boys you might be interested in...?"

"Right, right!" Tony leaned in, suddenly very attentive. "There must be plenty of admirers at school, yeah? Anyone who stands out? Tell your big sister Pepper, she'll help you vet him. Can't have you getting taken advantage of."

The others immediately perked up too. Things were set down. People drifted closer.

Dr. Banner pushed his glasses up. "Ah. The flutter of adolescence is quite a beautiful thing. Hermione, if there's anything troubling you, we're all very happy to listen."

Hermione stared at the circle of extremely interested faces.

Her scalp prickled.

She waved her hand quickly and pivoted. "I think we should focus on the hammer-lifting situation first, don't you? Heir to the throne! And also, the prima nocta thing. I want to try that too. So. Who's going first? Let's get started."

Faced with Hermione's complete immunity to social pressure, the others had no choice but to let it go.

Their gossiping instincts went unsatisfied. But the hammer challenge really was compelling.

Only Tony and Pepper lingered on it, exchanging a quiet look, like they'd both noticed the same thing.

Pepper sighed softly and leaned toward Tony's ear. "Tony... Hermione isn't..."

A single word surfaced in both their minds at the exact same moment. Their hearts did a small, horrified lurch.

Oh no. The way little Hermione was acting, it looked exactly like the legendary... OMG.

No one else noticed their little moment.

"I'll go first!" Dr. Banner volunteered, stepping up. He took a deep breath, gripped the handle, and hauled upward with everything he had.

The hammer didn't move.

He tried again, face going red, veins standing out, the hammer sat there like it had been bolted to the table.

Banner released it. Took two steps back.

Then, suddenly, he hunched forward, clenched both fists, and let out a strange bellow: "ROAR—!"

He was doing his best pre-Hulk impression. Clearly trying to laugh off the embarrassment.

The expected laughter didn't come. Everyone just watched him in silence.

"..."

Dr. Banner's grin froze. He retreated to the side with his dignity mostly in pieces.

A general sigh of relief ran through the room.

The Hulk's strength might not impress Hermione much, but for everyone else on Earth, it was still something extraordinary. Even extraordinary wasn't enough here.

"Brute force won't cut it." Tony rubbed his chin and stepped forward with the air of a man who has a better idea. "Let me try a more scientific approach."

He started the same way Banner had, pure arm strength. The hammer ignored him completely.

"Plan B." Tony snapped his fingers.

With a soft whirr, a red-and-gold mechanical arm shot across the room and locked onto his right arm and hand.

Tony gripped the handle again. The thrusters along his arm fired at full power, pushing upward with everything the suit could give.

The hammer lay there quietly. Not a tremor. Not a millimeter of movement. Like it was welded to the surface.

"I did say," Thor said from where he sat, arms folded, a smug smile he had absolutely no business wearing. "It has nothing to do with strength. The key is worthiness. And you are not worthy."

Tony dismissed the armor piece and curled his lip. "Tch. Lousy hammer. I'm done."

Hermione watched Thor's insufferably self-satisfied expression and rolled her eyes.

She couldn't watch this anymore. You, a mere Thor, a thousand-year-old giant baby, actually preening like that.

She stood up.

A sly smile.

"Let me try."

Her voice rang out clear and light, and every head in the room turned to look at her.

Seeing the expression on Hermione's face, that particular half-smile that never quite landed on innocent, Thor's grin slowly froze.

A very bad feeling crept up from somewhere in his chest.

➤ Next: Asgard's New Heir: Hermione Granger