Lightside Sith 010

“Master Skywalker, how nice of you to join us.” Kaine said, turning around with an overly gracious smile. 

He then gripped the teen in a side hug-because the bastard's mechanical hand was still latched onto him-and gave the Chosen One an equally intense squeeze. Channeling [Inflict Pain] from his fingertips-so as to mask his use of the Force-he met Anakin's piercing blue eyes. 

For a moment, neither man was willing to release the other, and Kaine even felt the edge of his clavicle begin to strain under the stress of the mechanical hand. 

“There you are. It's good to see you two have worked things out.” A soft, almost lispy woman's voice said from in front of them. 

Lifting his eyes, Kaine saw that Padmé was standing in front of them. From an outsiders perspective, it truly did appear that they were long lost friends reuniting at a party. 

Anakin's scowl transformed from one of hatred to disgust. His grip loosened, and just as he was about to recoil away in disgust, Kaine pulled him in for a more ‘friendly’ looking hug. 

+10LP. 

Kaine felt that he had gaslit the Chosen One enough. Now, the Lightside Sith thing to do, would be to garner his sympathies. 

“Oh yes, Anakin and I have much in common. Both of us are orphans, slaves, and we equally hate sand. Although I must apologize, but I think I'm the more handsome man between the two of us.” Kaine said with a disarming smile, and inclined his head towards the beautiful Senator. 

“Is that so? Maybe you could be friends even.” Padmé replied with a brilliant smile, and looked at Anakin with a pleading look. 

Anakin appeared as if he had a hot retort on the tip of his tongue, but ultimately shut his mouth, and sighed. 

Skywalker turned to him, and as if looking at him for the first time, gave him a scrutinizing gaze. “You were a slave?” 

“More accurately, I am a slave. You could say Count Dooku can claim my life at anytime, and tasks me with what I am to do with no room for refusal. If that is not a slave, then what is?” Kaine said in a bitter tone. 

As much as he respected Dooku for his skills & aura as a fan, this relationship could not continue. One of these days, he'd have to raise his own celebrity to a similar status, then replace the skilled duelist once his head was lopped off. 

“Oh you poor thing…and you're certain you won't join the Republic? The Jedi could protect you.” Padmé said, and once more looked towards Anakin pleadingly. 

“...I could put in a good word for you with the Council.” Anakin reluctantly added on. However, his tone was wavering. Although he still looked at Kaine like he had stolen his favorite ball before recess, it wasn't quite as harsh a look as a man hellbent on murdering the adulterer caught shmoozing his wife. 

“Thank you, but it is as you have said. You are Jedi. I am Sith. My goal in life is to defeat you.” Kaine replied with a small smile. 

“Why you-!” Anakin was quick to raise his voice, only for Padmé to pull him away. 

“But you're clearly such a kind soul, why must you do this?” Padmé asked, shaking her head in confusion. 

Kaine looked her in the eyes, then turned to look out the palace window. 

“Your Republic is diseased. If the Jedi were strong, then what was done to your planet years ago never would have happened. The blockade of Naboo is but the most obvious of examples. The Senate goes without punishment for crimes that would see any other man locked up for decades. What's worse is that members of your delegation support slavery, and actively work to keep their people poor. When droids are capable of 90% of heavy labor, this can only mean one thing, my dear. The Republic is evil.” Kaine said in an ever increasing volume, and then finally, spun around with a dramatic twirl, staring intensely at the duo of husband & wife. “And I intend to be the one to cleanse it of its rot.”

“I admit, the Republic has its flaws, but there is a framework to mitigate these issues. The CIS are worse, can't you see-!” Padmé argued, only for Kaine to hold up his hand, stopping her. 

“The CIS will have their day. To clean the sewers, one must work with others who are unafraid of being stained by filth. I do not wish to destroy the Jedi, as many other Sith are wont to do. No, I wish to do battle with them, to remind them of what they once were, what great heights they could once again soar to! Now, they are weak, sanctimonious fools. Men like Windu & Yoda pontificate for weeks on end whilst their people suffer. His mother died because he was told to let go! I. Will. Not. Stand for this!” Kaine finished his statement by unleashing his emotion. 

Padmé recoiled with tears in her eyes. “Anakin, say something.” 

Anakin had no rebuttal to his words, and had been staring at the ground with his fists clenched. Seemingly every single one of Kaine's words had been like gut punches, as his expression was full of sour unwillingness. 

+100LP. 

Seeing the number float up, Kaine was secretly pleased. Being a Lightside Sith wasn't really about saving lives, or stopping conflict. No, he benefited from exposing the impotence of others. From rocking their world views! This entire time, Kaine could be ragebating Skywalker into drawing his sword, but that was too easy! Breaking a body, anyone could do that. But the spirit, that was a much more satisfying nut to crush! 

Skywalker took a deep breath, and then he tenderly wiped away a tear that was forming at the corner of his wife's cheek. 

“Maybe you're right.” 

“Anakin!” 

“But one thing you're wrong about. A Jedi will always protect his friends.” Anakin said, and slowly unclipped his lightsaber. 

Blue light snapped into existence, and the Chosen One looked at him with a steady zen-like confidence. Gone was the angsty teenager, gone was the angry petty prick who had camped outside a suite for hours in the morning. Standing in front of Kaine at this very moment was Anakin Skywalker as he should be. Hero of the Republic, caring husband, and faithful Jedi. 

“You hurt my friend's feelings. Apologize.” Upon uttering his final words, Anakin's lightsaber seemed to hum in agreement. 

The entire venue seemed to go quiet, and most of the guests took a step back as if they were watching a show. Many of the people at the highest echelons had interacted with Jedi before, and understood just how dangerous things were progressing. These friends of the Jedi were quick to press themselves against the walls, making space. Before long, the entire ballroom floor practically belonged to them. 

Kaine felt his breath hitch, and stared at Anakin as if he were witnessing a ghost. Soon to be Knighted, Skywalker was technically still a Padawan. Only 18 or 19 right now, he was still a kid in Kaine's eyes. Yet like Alexander the Great, he had an aura about him that engendered respect. 

Slowly clapping his hands, Kaine wore a wide, genuine smile. 

“Perhaps I was mistaken. There might be worthy Jedi amongst the Order as of yet.” Kaine said in a deeply appreciative tone, before turning towards Padmé, and offering a light bow. “You have my apologies, Senator Amidala. Knight Skywalker is a most stalwart guardian, and worthy a friend. You are lucky to have him.” 

Padmé had been about to tear into Anakin for ruining her peace summit by drawing a weapon, but upon hearing Kaine's words, her brain momentarily 404'd. Then, glancing up at Anakin, and watching him stand strong in her defense, any anger washed away like a sandcastle in the high tide. 

“I am lucky, aren't I?” Padmé beamed with a great big smile. 

For a brief second, Kaine & Anakin had come to an understanding. 

He could see a small amount of respect form in Skywalker's eyes, and Kaine nodded in return. 

“You know…if that flying fish truly was an accident, I wonder what it would be like if you truly tried to do it. Perhaps some squid beast in the toilet?” Anakin said with a smirk, and a raised eyebrow. 

Kaine's eyes widened in appreciation, and a naked grin spread from ear to ear. 

“That’s a good idea, perhaps I'll use it next time. However, I think I'd much rather hire a bounty hunter who'd hire another bounty hunter who'd then use a droid who deployed worms to do their dirty work.” Kaine said with a laugh. 

Anakin's eyes glimmered as he recognized that this was the exact same turn of events that took place when Jango Fett ‘tried’ to assassinate Padmé two weeks ago. (That being the start of Episode II.) 

“I don't think that'd work. Pawning off hits never seems to end well.” Anakin said with a smile. 

“Right?” 

Padmé looked between the two of them, utterly lost with what was happening. One minute, Anakin was so cool and strong, the next, he was discussing her murder with a smile?!?! 

+25LP wafted over from Padmé, and Kaine, sensing her mounting fury at the Chosen One, found it impossible to hide his smirk. 

‘Ah, my apologies, Your Majesty, but men can bro over the dumbest things. I'm so sorry your so-called peace summit-which is really just a bunch of famous people jerking themselves off with how they're such good people-was ruined because your husband wanted to have a fun time hanging out with someone else. 

Glancing out of the corner of his eye, Kaine saw that half of Palpatine’s face was under some shadow, giving the hook-nosed man a sinister appearance. 

At that moment, once Anakin had mostly dropped his guard, and was about to withdraw his lightsaber, the glass panes on the giant windows along the side of the palace's room shattered! Shards fell everywhere, and a handful of smoke grenades had been tossed inside. Most of the guests were coughing up lungs, and Anakin-standing near the center of the attack-was covering his eyes, shouting out for Padmé. 

As for Kaine, it felt like he had pepper in his eyes, and lungs, yet his superior biology allowed him to see through it all. Narrowing his eyes, he saw a group of ten jetbooster aerial B2's descend into the building, and begin to blast the security personnel to death. 

“Renstar, if you're behind this, I'll gut you from end to end!” Anakin said in a vile, threatening tone. 

“There is no emotion, there is peace.

There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.

There is no passion, there is serenity.

There is no chaos, there is harmony.

There is no death, there is the Force.” Kaine recited the Jedi Code in a patronizing tone of voice. “By my ancestors, I swear I did not do this.” 

“Lord Renstar, we have retrieved the target. Follow me for extraction.” One of the modified B2's said in a deep voice, and began to drag Padmé-who was tied up in cabling-away. 

Kaine felt the corner of his lips twitch as he sensed Anakin's hatred, and also witnessed both the Chosen One, and Master of Sarcasm, Obi-Wan Kenobi make short work of the intruders. Meanwhile, a floating droid transport had flown up towards the edge of the room, and the B2 shoved Padmé inside. 

Narrowing his eyes, Kaine saw this event as an opportunity. Dashing away from Skywalker, he stepped onto the ramp of the transport, and just as it was about to lift off, he stabbed the B2 with his lightsaber, killing it instantly. Then, he leaned in close to whisper in Padmé’s ear. 

“This wasn't my idea, sorry, but again, I was ordered to kill you. Please make sure to scream as loud as you can for this next part, it needs to look convincing.” Kaine urgently intoned.  

“Why would I need to-AHHHHHHH!!!” Padmé began, only to scream at the top of her lungs as Kaine suddenly kicked her out of the rising transport down towards a furiously charging Skywalker. 

Disabling his lightsaber, Skywalker caught his wife, and rolled, breaking the force of her fall. He then stared up at Kaine, helpless as the ship rose higher & higher. 

“Gentlemen, my Lady! You will always remember this as the day you almost caught Lord Kaine Renstar!” 

+50LP -Anakin 

+50LP -Padmé

+50LP -Palpatine 

And a cheeky salute from Obi-Wan met his eyes, before the transport jetted out of sight. 

After flying for a small distance, Kaine jumped out onto the roof of some building, and activating [Hide Presence] successfully made it to the hangar where the Odachi was stowed. 

Sitting in the cockpit of his ship, Kaine wore the biggest grin on his face. He was certain that after tonight, the name Kaine Renstar would live on in infamy! 

Taking off into the atmosphere, he was about to punch in the coordinates for a return to Ryloth, when a flashing light suddenly forced a connection. 

“Return to Serenno, we have much to discuss.” 

~~~~~~

AN: As much as I enjoy clowning on Anakin, I don’t want to turn this into a Bash fic. The dude might be easy to enrage, and have plenty of terrible jealousy problems…but he's also Him. I've got to give the guy his flowers.