Science Experiment B.E.

Interviewer (cheerful, slightly nervous):
Congratulations, Emily! Your experiment looked like it worked… spectacularly.

Emily (deadpan, gripping the shirt):
Thanks.

Interviewer:
So, what does it actually feel like?

Emily:
They’re heavy. Like… stupidly heavy. Each one feels like a ten-pound kettlebell welded to my ribs. My lower back is already screaming and it’s not even noon.

Interviewer:
And the shirt you’re wearing…?

Emily:
This is my boyfriend’s. Only button-up on the planet that still reaches around me. I annihilated every single top I own in one afternoon. Buttons were flying like gunfire.

Interviewer:
Anything else we should know?

Emily:
Yeah. I’m still growing. Right now. I can literally feel the pressure building while we talk. The fabric’s getting tighter by the minute…

Science Experiment B E (YouTube)