Today has been quite a day lovelies, and what I’m about to tell you may come as quite a shock. You see, while many people have cats, or fish as pets, I have a cow. Sure, she looks like a German Shepherd, but I promise, she is unreasonably heavy, and dislikes baths. Long story short, I injured myself bathing my dog. If I’d led with that, you would have thought, “how?!?” Because I have a giant spoiled, baby of a dog thing, that’s how.

To make it worse, she’s too stubborn to even bring me things. I know she understands me. I’ll bet if I asked if she wanted to go for a ride, she’d know what I meant. Bring me a pillow? blink blink.

I’m probably going to just upload the video from last night without any sound. I spent several frustrating hours trying to write something cute, but couldn’t focus. It’s probably better this way. You can just listen to whatever you want.