Midnight Thoughts

There is a battle inside me, a constant war between the hunger to let you in and the need to keep you broken at my feet. You awaken something sensual in me, something that coils low in my belly and purrs like a predator scenting prey.

I want you to become my good devoted boy, to let myself loose in your worship, to let you meticulously please me and see me undone. I want to feel you give everything you have for pleasing me..

I want to feel my climax burst in your mouth while I breathe heavy, while I moan your name like a curse, while I grip your hair and pull until your scalp burns, while I wrap my legs around your throat and squeeze just enough to make you a bit dizzy.

I want to drown in the sensation of you, your tongue, your devotion, your trembling obedience. I want to feel alive in your utter surrender.

But at the same time, I want to exclude you. I want you to watch… kneeling, aching, hands bound behind your back, while I come undone without you. I want your eyes to be the only thing that touches me. I want you to see every shudder, every gasp, every drop of wetness that slicks my thighs, and know you cannot have it. Not yet. Not until I decide you’ve earned the privilege of being my ruin.

This is hero worship, boy. This is devotion carved into your bones. You will learn to live for the sound of my approval, for the barest flicker of warmth in my gaze.

I will be cruel, and I will be kind, and I will make you feel more alive than you have ever been, even as I tear you apart.

The exquisite tension between giving you everything and taking it all away…
And when you finally break, when you weep and beg and offer me your very soul, I will taste again your devotion like the sweetest poison, and I will smile.

And then I will destroy you again, just to watch you rebuild yourself into something that belongs only to me.