FINE! I'LL DO IT MYSELF
I couldn't wait to feel someone else in my hole, so I decided to pull out my favorite dildo and go to work on myself. I loosened myself up with my fingers until I was ready to lube up and go for something bigger. I kept stretching my hole by pulling the dildo in and out, wondering when the next time a real dick was going to do that to me. Then I sat on it and pressed it as deep as I could until I jerked a leg-shaking load out. Not a bad way to spend a sunny afternoon!