I have been away a while because of all that stuff happining the last few years and especially 2025, but also i disliked my weight loss in that time from close to 580 lbs down to current 511 lbs.

I still admire my fat extremely and never want to lose weight on purpose.

We are living together now in an 3 person appartment, as now all three diagnosed autists. Getting this diagnose last month was an important step to get some care, help and legal stuff going, which will also assist me in functioning better you can say. I also have to process this diagnosis because looking back till my early childhood, i always was different and had problems to keep pace with others. Early social masking and acting like "Others wo function", got pretty early on an routine and is so normal for me, that it feels like putting on shoes going outside. Sadly, this routine doesnt make it easier or less exhausting. Over the span of a day i always felt like burned out, even when i was thinner and younger.

Since i now now what caused so much misery and failure in my life, i can go finally getting rid of self hate in that regard, making me less depressed. So i feel like using this bit of free and new energy to reward myself with good food and hopefully new pounds on the scale.

Our house tho is still a mess, but since our partner moved in and we are three now, everything improved and is still improving. Cant wait to finalize our home and since our second man now in our home is also a feedee, good cooking is done way more regulary and that also helps to spend not so much money on orderimg food and insane fast food prices with disgusting quality.

We discuss already maybe doing this here together since we are two male feedee and a female feeder. He is already around 320 lbs and wants more. Our feeder does not on purpose gain weight but she did and i think we have to finalize our home before we can start something together. So, yeah thinks have to be discusses and everyone has to be comfortable.

Hope you enjoy this video, even when i lost some weight. I dislike pretending to gain weight or holding it when its not the case. I just want to enjoy posting from this day on.