Good boy, listen up—Puppi is taking the leash and changing your career path, my little tail-wagger.

Forget those silly dreams you had before. You’re going to be Puppi’s BRAINLESS BOOTY PUP from now on, aren’t you?

Pump, pump, pump, good pup!

Up and down, wagging that tail like the obedient doggy you are.

This is your life now, my mindless mutt—just keep humping yourself dumber and dumber for Mommy. Who’s a good, dumb boy? That’s right, you are! Ruff, ruff!